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The 411 Movies Top 5: The Top 5 Wanted Crossover Movies

March 26, 2016 | Posted by Shawn S. Lealos

The 411 Movies Top 5: Hello everyone and welcome to 411 Movies Top 5 List. We take a topic each week and all the writers here on 411 wrestling will have the ability to participate and give us their Top 5 on said topic. So, onto this week’s topic…

The Top 5 Most Wanted Crossover Movies

BRYAN KRISTOPOWITZ
5. THE A-TEAM VS. THE EXPENDABLES – This is the movie version of the A-Team, not the TV version, although the TV version is awesome. Think about how in the Expendables movies how Barney’s team is sort of in competition for work with Trench’s team. Now, instead of Trench’s team it’s the A-Team, brought in by some badass villain that, in the end, wants to play both mercenary teams off of one another, hoping that they somehow kill each other in the process of completing some job. Of course, in the end, Hannibal Smith’s team teams up with Barney’s team and they attack the HQ of the bastard that set them up. It’s all a big cliché that we’ve all seen a million times in action movies, sure, but I think it would be neat to see them teams play off one another, both against one another and as a gigantic team.

4. CHO OSAKI (REVENGE OF THE NINJA) VS. CASEY BOWMAN (NINJA) – Obviously, this is yet another “heroes that fight at some point but then team up to take down some gigantic bad guy” story idea, since both Cho and Casey are good guy ninjas. I mean, yeah, the story could have one of them be the bad guy (probably Cho since he’s older and likely more cynical about life) but I would rather see these two badass ninjas tag team a bunch of bad guys hell bent on world domination or just owning the drug trade in California or Utah or wherever. The individual fight scenes would be epic, and the eventual tag team scenes would be even more epic. I think if this did happen we’d get more ninja movies, something the world definitely needs.

3. PAUL KERSEY AND “DIRTY” HAYY CALAHAN – Imagine a kind of Michael Mann’s Heat type situation with these two. Kersey is in San Francisco engaging in vigilante activities, and Dirty Harry is investigating Kersey’s various killings, trying to figure out what the heck is going on. Sounds a bit like a cross between Magnum Force, Sudden Impact, and the Death Wish movies, right? You know it does. I’m not sure which direction it would go in the end, though. The obvious, crowd pleasing scenario would have Kersey and Callahan taking out a gang of bad guys like in the end of Death Wish 3, but that may be a little too crowd pleasing. Maybe it should end in a stalemate of some sort. Going back to the Heat idea, think about that scene where Pacino and DeNiro talk to one another in the restaurant. Now imagine Kersey and Callahan having a discussion about the law, revenge, and what the limits should be. Insane tension would be an understatement, especially when Callahan explains how he isn’t a bloodthirsty psycho.

2. BATMAN VS. THE PREDATOR – I would love to see a version of the second Batman Vs. The Predator comic book series, where Batman has a price on his head, a bunch of big time assassins show up in Gotham City to take him down, and the Predator shows up because it’s hot and that’s just what Predators do. I can see the trailer now, with a sort of roll call of assassins brought in with the Predator showing up at the very end, cloaked in his invisibility thing, and then flashing his true form at the very end just in case no one knew what kind of equipment and weaponry the Predators have at their disposal. And then the movie would be Batman trying to outwit his assassins (the ones the Predator doesn’t kill) and then dealing with the Predator at the end. It would be interesting to see how Batman would deal with an alien attacker. Would he try to kill it or would he try to just outwit it and send it back to its home planet? How much of Gotham City would get nuked by the Predator’s suicide bomb?

1. THE PUNISHER VS. THE DEVIL’S REJECTS – This is the definitive Punisher from Punisher: War Zone, Ray Stevenson, and would basically be ninety minutes of Frank Castle in Texas, taking out the Devil’s Rejects in breathtakingly brutal fashion. And then, after putting a grenade down Spaulding’s pants, decapitating Baby, and engaging in an epic knife fight with Otis, the Punisher would delve into the bowels of the Firefly ranch and just lay waste to everything there. Everything. Why? Because the Firefly clan, while entertaining villains, are nothing but murdering scumbags and deserve to die in bloody, painful ways. And while the Punisher isn’t necessarily a guy that engages in torture, I’d imagine that taking down the Firefly clan would take some time since they’re resilient. And, no, the Punisher isn’t going down like Sheriff Wydell, getting his neck snapped by Tiny. Fuck that. The Punisher is going to hit Tiny with his War Wagon van, shoot him with a shotgun a few times, and then set him on fire. And then, if he refuses to go down and stay down, hit the seven footer with a grenade launcher. Because it’s what needed, man. The Firefly clan needs to go down and go down hard. Motherfucker.

Shawn S. Lealos
5. Constantine and Batman – With the high praise for Ben Affleck’s portrayal of Bruce Wayne and Batman in the new Batman V Superman movie, and more Batman movies coming with Affleck in a role he was born to play, I want to see this team-up. Constantine is of course a mage and is pretty damn powerful, but a pretty big jerk too. Batman doesn’t like things he can’t control – like magic – and has always been a pretty big jerk too. Now, Matt Ryan needs to play Constantine here because he was fantastic on the TV show, but this could be an awesome team-up movie.
4. Blade V. Buffy the Vampire Slayer – OK, I know that the movie version of Buffy was camp and nothing more. But, imagine bringing the Buffy universe to the big screen and have them have to deal with the Day Walker when he comes to town. Blade will be after someone big and badass, but Buffy (being the unreasonable and jumping to conclusions girl that she is) sees him as just another vampire to kill. They have their big fight and then team up to hunt and kill the most despicable vampire of them all – Edward from Twilight.

3. Firefly Meets Riddick – Pitch Black is one of my favorite sci-fi horror movies and Firefly is one of my favorite sci-fi TV shows turned into a movie. The two stories have a lot in common, with Riddick a fugitive who is also a bad ass at killing monsters. The Firefly crew are basically rebels who have a pretty good track record of beating some pretty nasty bad guys on their own. Now, put them in the same universe, and imagine how Riddick and Jayne would interact and how Mal would deal with it. Vin Diesel loves geek properties and it doesn’t get more geek friendly than Firefly.

2. Avengers vs. X-Men – Yeah, everyone is getting all excited about Civil War, but there is still something that is holding back my excitement – and I am both a huge Marvel Movies and comic book movies fan in general. The problem for me is that I ABSOLUTELTY HATED the Civil War comic books. Oh, yay, we get to see heroes we have grown to love of the years fight each other – wonderful. I do not care because the comics made me not care. However, when The Avengers and X-Men fought a few years later, the story actually made me interested and I understood everyone’s reasoning behind them fighting (except Wolverine, who just frustrated me). Anyway, Avengers vs. X-Men was just a better story than Civil War, and I would love to see that on the big screen.

1. Freddy vs. Jason vs. Ash – With the awesome success of the Evil Dead television series, it proves that Ash is still as popular today as he ever way. He is also a resourceful SOB and I think that it would be incredibly awesome to see the adaptation of Freddy vs. Jason vs. Ash to come to the big screen, especially if (a) Sam Raimi was involved, (B) Kane Hodder played Jason and (C) Robert England played Freddy. Yes please.

YOUR TURN KNOW IT ALLS

List your Top Five for this week’s topic in the comment section using the following format:

5. CHOICE: Explanation
4. CHOICE: Explanation
3. CHOICE: Explanation
2. CHOICE: Explanation
1. CHOICE: Explanation

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