wrestling / Columns
411 Fact or Fiction Wrestling: Chris Jericho’s Latest Run, Brie vs. Nikki, Roman Reigns’ Push, More
Welcome back to the latest edition of 411 Fact or Fiction, Wrestling Edition! Stuff happened, people loved/hated it and let everyone else know. I pick through the interesting/not so interesting tidbits and then make 411 staff members discuss them for your pleasure. Battling this week: First up is the one and only Len Archibald! He battles Jack Stevenson!
1. The DQ finish at Night of Champions is acceptable if it leads to Cena vs. Lesnar at Hell in a Cell.
Len Archibald: FACT – It is only acceptable in storyline terms (so Cena can make a claim he was never defeated), but it does not negate the fact that the finish was still a steaming pile of Great Khali-sized dung. I personally understand what the WWE was going for and I personally expected some form of shenanigans, but I am soooooo confused over Seth Rollins’ involvement to the finish. Paul Heyman has been portrayed as a sleazy, sketchy figure who would stoop to any level to keep his meal ticket, so why wouldn’t he be the one to get involved? On top of that, why didn’t Lesnar just up and MURDERDEATHKILL Rollins when he got back on his feet, even after Cena dispatched him? That’s what the Brock Lesnar who has been booked as an unstable psychotic monster would have done. At the end of Night of Champions, I needed to take some Tylenol-3’s because my head hurt so much.
Jack Stevenson: FACT – I mean, it’s far from certain that we are going to get Cena-Lesnar IV at Hell in a Cell, but if we do, it’ll be a heck of a match. So far they’ve delivered a series of excellent bouts and memorable moments, and the opportunity to lock them in a Cell and not let them leave till one of them has been pulped is surely too good to pass up. For one thing, their last match ended in disqualification due to outside interference, so the next logical step is a match in which there are no disqualifications and people can’t interfere. For another, the Hell in a Cell format has been watered down so badly over the past few years that gullible people will soon start trying to use it as medicine; the consequence of putting between one and three on at the same show in the same month every year is that rivalries have been settled in the cell whether they truly need to be or not, and the structure has lost much of its lustre. The days of Jim Ross barking out about five different satanic nicknames for the darn thing a second seem almost desirable in comparison. But Cena-Lesnar really is a massive, hate-filled, violent rivalry, and Hell in a Cell seems a natural endpoint for it. With all that taken into consideration, I think it was perfectly justifiable to utilize a reasonably well done DQ finish and extend the feud for another month, a clean win for Lesnar would have been a definitive end to the rivalry and one for Cena would have squandered all the momentum Brock’s built up with hard work and Heyman promos and streak conquering. But, yeah, whether we’ll actually get the Hell in a Cell match is another matter, at the moment it isn’t looking too likely.
2. Roman Reigns’ big push will end up completely derailed due to him having to take time off for hernia surgery.
Len Archibald: FICTION – If you think a hernia injury is going to derail Roman Reigns’ status as the “Chosen One”, I have a bridge in Alaska I would like to sell you? Yes, I pulled out a six-year old political joke for this one. Actually, I think Reigns’ injury is the single best thing to happen to him. Not because I am wishing him harm, but because the backlash against him was staring to occur with the fans, and he can now use this time at home and behind the scenes with WWE agents to prepare himself for what seems to be his destiny, a one-on-one collision with Brock Lesnar at WrestleMania. Injury did not stop Austin, Triple H, John Cena or Edge on their way to making a triumphant return at the Royal Rumble – and this is pretty much what will happen. Where is Creed with some “My Sacrifice” videos when you need them?
Jack Stevenson: FICTION – WWE clearly like Roman Reigns a heck of a lot and one injury is not going to spoil that. It might even help it in a perverse respect, since Reigns was starting to grow tiresome with his humourlessness and Superman invulnerability- I mean, he was much the same way in the Shield, but he smiled occasionally and took a few beatings with his partners, so he seemed much cooler. He might seem fresher and more likeable when he comes back, although obviously injury is never a good thing. Certainly though he’s not going to fall anywhere close to Ziggler purgatory because of this minor setback.
3. Brie Bella vs. Nikki Bella is the worst feud of the year so far.
Len Archibald: FICTION – I want to say Fact in the worst way. I really do. I had hoped that Daniel Bryan’s awesomeness would rub off on his wife, but holy Shockmaster, Brie can’t emote and create a compelling persona to connect with an audience to save her life. On top of all this, the heel/face dynamic has been completely reversed, as Nikki is totally justified in her actions. Brie did leave her sister high and dry when she quit. Brie only came back to the WWE to get her job back and not save her sister (using a heelish tactic of suing the company if she doesn’t get her way.) The feud has been heatless, and even the greatness of Paige and AJ being tossed in the fold has only hurt their status – and the Divas Championship as well. There is so much Price is Right Loser Horn going on here. So why do I have this at fiction? Simple: Bully Ray vs. Dixie Carter nearly made me summon the powers of Triple H and almost caused me to smash a sledgehammer through my television.
Jack Stevenson: FACT – I certainly can’t think of anything worse on the top of my head. It’s a shame because for a long time I thought the Bellas didn’t deserve the loathing they were afforded by portions of the fanbase, they were never outstanding pro wrestlers but they were pretty competent by Diva standards and yet seemed to have a disproportionate amount of bite spat in their general direction. They’re spitting it right back with this rivalry though, because this has been an ugly, unpleasant feud, consisting largely of trashy soap opera plot points screeched monotonously at the viewer. It’s only vaguely watchable when Stephanie McMahon is around and she’s barely been involved at all these past few weeks, making for segments I would confidently fast-forward through if I wasn’t obligated to have a unique opinion on every single fucking one of them for the 4Rs column. There’s nothing remotely enjoyable about this feud, Brie’s been made to look quite unlikeable by all of Nikki’s allegations about her that have remained unanswered, and Nikki’s been made to look quite unlikeable because she is Nikki Bella and has her personality and everything. Daniel Bryan’s protracted rivalry with Kane was worse in the respect that it utterly squandered a World Championship reign that I really think could have been the most significant since John Cena’s first, but this Bellas feud has inflicted the most direct pain on the viewer, so I don’t have many issues with giving this a fact.
SWITCH!
4. You like that WWE has been playing hot potato with the WWE Intercontinental & Divas Titles.
Jack Stevenson: FICTION – Dolph Ziggler’s Intercontinental Championship victory over the Miz on Raw was a nice moment and a good match, but I don’t see how this achieves anything long term. I mean, if they want people to be excited about their secondary titles, create meaningful rivalries for them and make them career changers- there is literally nothing Sheamus has done as United States Champion, for example, that he couldn’t have done without the belt. I know those are opinions so simple and clichéd they could appear in the opening monologue of Jim Ross’ podcast, but I think they’re also true. Changing the titles a lot helps superficially in the sense that a title change will always attain a reaction of some kind, but the problem that the Intercontinental Championship has is that it seems superfluous in the modern WWE landscape, and frequent title reigns that last only a few days are superfluous in their own right. As for the Divas Championship, end this creepy childish little lesbian obsession and let characters develop more than a fifth of a dimension and maybe that will help.
Len Archibald: FICTION – I freely admit I have an old school mentality when it comes too professional wrestling. I like my faces heroic, my heels to cause riots and my championship reigns lengthy and meaningful. The Intercontinental Title used to be the championship that was awarded to the best overall “worker”, and now it is just…meh. Yes, I am happy that Dolph Ziggler is the champ again, but why lose it to The Miz in the first place only to get it back one night later? At least the Divas title changing hands have been months apart and has a long-running feud attached to it. To be honest, when the WWE Divas Title is treated like the more prestigious accolade, there are some problems. What the IC Title needs is some “Bad News” – and I think we could all use some right now. I feel that if Barrett did not get injured, there would be no “hot potato-ing” of the title.
5. Chris Jericho’s recent WWE run was a failure.
Jack Stevenson: FACT – I think Chris Jericho is really, really fantastic at the pro wrestling. His career is just full of great matches, he’s one of the best of all time on the microphone, and his heel run from 2008-2010 is one of the finest artistic accomplishments in the history of the business, a total character re-invention that worked perfectly and led to all these phenomenal matches and angles and solidified his status as one of the most admirable performers in the history of the business. I even think he’s got the best podcast in the wrestling business! In case you haven’t got the subtle message I’m putting across here, it’s that Chris Jericho is fucking ace, and that makes it all the more troubling and disappointing that his most recent run wasn’t even in the same atmosphere as ‘fucking ace.’ There was certainly nothing fucking ace about his feud about Bray Wyatt, it was more of a fucking anti-climax- it kicked off with an exciting beatdown and finished with a very good Steel Cage match, but literally nothing of note happened in between. Since that took up almost the entirety of his run, it’s impossible not to judge it on those terms, and his final match with Randy Orton, while pretty fun, didn’t really give much reason to re-evaluate. It wasn’t a failure in the same way that the aforementioned Bella feud is a failure, but by his own lofty standards, you’d have to say it was.
Len Archibald: FICTION – Most of my responses have made me sound like a crotchety old man, so let’s get some positivity going. I never think any Chris Jericho run is a failure, as it is Chris F’n Jericho and my fellow Canuck (technically) always puts a smile on my face. Could he have been better utilized? Sure, but that is the case for basically everyone on the WWE roster, save for Ambrose, Rollins and all of NXT. Did he and Bray Wyatt not “click” as we had hoped? Certainly, but that was not Jericho’s – or even Wyatt’s fault, as we were not given a real reason to care about why these two had been feuding. I even enjoyed Jericho’s Night of Champions match against Randy Orton, when again – we were given no reason to care about the match. The reality is Chris Jericho was not a failure, but WWE Creative failed Y2J and the fans.
6. The recent Grantland article on TNA Wrestling made you feel more optimistic about their future.
Jack Stevenson: FICTION – Optimism and TNA don’t go hand in hand. TNA have shot themselves in the foot so many times they don’t have feet at all any more, just bloody, infected stumps. The article is really enjoyable and it does give reason for TNA fans to be hopeful but it also meticulously chronicles the many, many, many errors the company’s made in its existence, and I don’t think there’s any real evidence that it’s going to stop making them. The consensus is that the last few weeks of Impact have been very good fun and probably better than what’s offered on Monday night, but we’ve been able to say that before, in the summer of 2012 and on January 4th 2010 and for around 18 months between 2005 and 2006, but they never seem to properly build on it, they atone for all their sins in purgatory and then get to heaven and start making incredibly crass jokes about Jesus and get thrown back down again. I don’t have faith in any major wrestling company in the United States to provide truly high-end professional wrestling on a weekly basis. I think TNA especially suffers from a culture of short-termism, always looking for that one move which is going to catapult them in the general direction of the stratosphere, and I think maybe since they seem so committed to it, we should too- just enjoy the product on the sporadic occasions where it’s actually good, and not think about whether they’ll be able to sustain it for a meaningful length of time.
Len Archibald: FACT – As a man of logic and reason, my head says Fiction. It has been documented by current and former owners alike: TNA is in financial disarray. Layoffs, poor (non-existent) house show attendance and of course the on again/off-again relationship between the promotion and Spike TV has created palpable tension for Dixie Carter and her fans. The future does indeed look bleak – and even the prospect of the switch to a new channel does not show the promise of yielding a substantial enough of a return that will keep the company afloat. But as a fan of wrestling, I have to go with my heart. The Grantland article accomplished one thing that most of the dirtsheets did not: give a true voice and honest point of view from those in power who have a personal stake in the whole ordeal. Dixie seems as Southern and aloof as ever (not saying that Southerners are aloof, she just happens to be both – my wife made the apt comparison of Sarah Palin running a wrestling promotion *shudders*), but the article paints Carter as someone who genuinely wants the promotion to succeed despite its failings. Carter, though – is not the reason I feel cautiously optimistic; as it has been since the advent of television, professional wrestling lives and dies by its talent and reaction from the fans. TNA has been putting on some of the most consistently good shows for the past few months now, the fans on the East Coast who have been seeing these shows have reacted positively and breathed new life into the promotion. The Grantland article may have also subconsciously worked something of a miracle as well – the narrative of TNA’s existence has been positively spun as a promotion that boasts the talent to compete with Vince McMahon but not the resources. If there are any business-minded individuals who read the article with awareness of the money the WWE brings in, just maybe someone out there can put up the capital to assist TNA. The article also has given a boost to TNA in regards to some mild mainstream attention – I have had friends approach me asking (appropriately) “Why would a promotion call themselves TNA? Are they like GLOW?” When I say they actually boast a talented roster, some scoff, but some seem open to now check them out. I have to say Fact. Wrestling needs more wrestling to survive. Wrestling needs more wrestlers to survive. This may be the few times where lack of reason will bite me in the ass, but as a fan of the artform, TNA needs to survive.
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