411 Fact or Fiction Wrestling: Will Austin Wrestle at WM 32?

Welcome back to the latest edition of 411 Fact or Fiction, Wrestling Edition! Stuff happened, people loved/hated it and let everyone else know. I pick through the interesting/not so interesting tidbits and then make 411 staff members discuss them for your pleasure. Battling this week are Dino Zee and Nick Marsico!

Questions were sent out Monday.

Participants were told to expect wrestling-related content, as well as possible statements on quantum physics, homemade pharmaceuticals, the Turtle Total Trip Theorem, pizza and hydroponics.

1. Despite the teases on the podcast with Paul Heyman, Steve Austin will not wrestle at WrestleMania 32.

Dino Zee: FACT – I’m probably dead wrong. In fact, we should get rid of that “probably” thing, right? I’m most likely totally wrong on this. Still, there’s a part of me that, selfishly, wants my attendance at WrestleMania XIX to be the last Steve Austin match. That wants his final in-ring Mania moments to be kicking out of two Rock Bottoms, but not the third. To have Rock tell him how much Austin has meant to his career. To have Austin soak in the cheers, and then take that one final walk back up the ramp. I’d like it to stay as it is. But, this is wrestling, and I’m most likely wrong, and Austin’s going to wrestle Brock at WrestleMania 32. I fully acknowledge this is a possibility. Still, I’ll die on my sword, call “FACT” on this, and then silently stew in a butthurt world when he takes the match anyways. How’s that for a hedging of bets?

Nick Marsico: FACT – Austin has very little interest in getting back into the ring. His body isn’t likely to be able to hold up to have a proper wrestling match, and that alone is reason enough for him to stand back. Years ago Steve Austin said that once he was no longer able to go at the level that he sees fit, he would hang up the boots. That happened in 2003 and sure enough he retired. He’s been out of the ring for 12 years at this point, and chances are that he isn’t going to be able to put on a match that will be up to his high standard for himself. If he does, in some miraculous turn of events, get himself into the condition that he believes he can make a go at it, the man standing across the ring from him sure as heck won’t be Brock Lesnar. His body wouldn’t be able to hold up in the style of match that Lesnar is known for, so it will end up being sub-par. Nor will it be Hulk Hogan, because Austin won’t be able to have a real match with him, and there’s no way Austin would agree to that. Stone Cold is my favorite wrestler of all time, and I have long resigned myself to the fact that WrestleMania XIX against The Rock was his final match. I would love to see just one more, but I won’t get my hopes up.

2. Dean Ambrose should win the world title at the Money in the Bank PPV.

Dino Zee: FICTION – This one is pretty tough, because I can see both sides of this debate quite easily. If Seth Rollins loses at Money in the Bank, then his reign goes down as one of the worst ones we’ve had in the modern era. Daniel Bryan last year bad. It started off GREAT, but quickly whimpered when he had no real feuds to take care of. Randy Orton teased him into one title shot, and then we got a multiman match after that. The bottom line is, Seth hasn’t done much as champ, and that’s really too bad. To have him lose in a match where he’s preaching that he needs no help to get the job done? Yeah, that might be a tough recovery. However, the same can be said for Ambrose. How many big time matches can the guy lose while staying over? Will we have him look like a complete dolt if he loses (like, say, when Bray Wyatt interfered in the Hell in a Cell match between Dean and Seth)? Both acts are so vital, and both get good-great reactions from the crowd, that I am actually really worried about what happens. Luckily, the Monday Night Rule says Seth keeps the belt, and I’m going FICTION on this. Dean should probably win the belt in the next few months, but I don’t think MITB is the place to do it.

Nick Marsico: FACT – Of course he should win. He won’t, but he should. WWE is afraid to do anything that doesn’t fit into their shortsighted long-term plan. That’s almost oxymoronic, but it’s actually quite an apt way to explain how the company does things these days when it comes to that WWE Title. Brock Lesnar was screwed out of the belt and didn’t get his immediate rematch. He is reportedly set to return very soon, and he is going to want that title back. Seth Rollins is the man who screwed him over, so Seth Rollins will be the champion that Brock defeats to take back control of the belt. It’s a fine linear story. There’s absolutely nothing wrong with it. Throw in the added side story of Roman Reigns turning heel and possibly replacing Rollins in The Authority and it’s actually a good story, to be perfectly honest. Rollins was a good little soldier until he won the title, but the success went to his head and he stopped listening to mommy and daddy. Reigns is desperate and will do anything for a shot at what was stolen from him, and he’s envious of Dean Ambrose, who he doesn’t believe should have jumped him in line. Brock comes back, easily picks off Rollins who has become a man without a country, and Roman waits. Eventually he turns face again and Lesnar ends up solidly as a heel, Roman cashes in and does what he was supposed to do at WrestleMania 31. The problem with staying the course in this case is that they have unwittingly stumbled onto something big with Dean Ambrose. He’s hot right now (has been for quite a while despite WWE’s attempts to push him aside) and they should run with it. Putting the belt on Ambrose and letting him hold onto it for a while is worth a try. It could end up putting him, Reigns and Rollins all on a much higher level, and it could be accomplished simply by eschewing the horse blinders and tossing the game plan in the trash.

3. Kevin Owens needs to defeat John Cena at the Money in the Bank PPV.

Dino Zee: FACT – But he won’t, because Cena already lost the unimportant match in this feud, just like when he lost to Rusev at Fastlane. Then Cena can get back to telling us how we’re all horrible for not cheering him, because he helps kids with cancer, and if you boo Cena, you’re booing those kids. WWE Logic, baby! The funny thing here is that I’m neither a) a huge Owens mark nor b) a huge Cena hater, but the booking of this feud has basically highlighted nearly every single issue most of the more levelheaded people who don’t love Cena call out. Smug as fuck, condescending, and never able to defend his actions/words beyond “Well I love the troops, so if you don’t love me, you don’t love them!” Owens coming out with another win might actually bring Cena back to earth, which would be GREAT! But we’re not gonna get that. Instead, another guy will learn that you just can’t keep this Cena kid down.

Nick Marsico: FACT – He needs this win more than he needs air to breathe. John Cena is still writing him off as an unproven guy who doesn’t have what it takes to make it in the big leagues. Don’t take his hollow acknowledgement of defeat as anything other than that. Yes, Cena did admit defeat and owned up to the fact that there was nothing underhanded about it. He is fully aware of Kevin Owens’ career status and has said as much right to the man’s face. On RAW, however, he continued to echo the sentiment that Owens still isn’t as good as he says he is. The feud right now is taking the direction of Cena saying “yeah, you beat me, but…” instead of “you beat me and I want another shot at you”. Like I said, don’t be mistaken. They are trying to paint a picture of Cena showing respect for Owens and wanting to make it even, but when you use bullshit instead of paint it’s easy to see the truth. I don’t know, I lost where I was going with that metaphor. The point is that Cena is giving Owens a bunch of underhanded compliments while telling Owens and the world that he’s a glorified rookie with a chip on his shoulder. If Cena wins on Sunday his argument is validated. If Owens wins on Sunday it proves that he isn’t a fluke and that he belongs where he is. The man has to be dominant. For his push to not fall right out of the gate, WWE cannot beat Kevin Owens this quickly, and especially not under this circumstance against this wrestler. Sunday night will make the difference between Kevin Owens: Super Heel and Kevin Owens: Angry Fat Guy.

SWITCH!

4. You are excited for Sunday’s Money in the Bank PPV.

Nick Marsico: FACT – I’m very excited to see what happens. I’m going into the show with high expectations for match quality, if nothing else, but I do feel doubts in all of the obvious winners. Seth Rollins is the obvious winner in the ladder match for the title, but I want to see WWE throw us a snapping curve ball instead of serving up a tired fastball from a weathered arm. The same goes for the MITB contract match. Roman Reigns is going to win. Some people are speculating (or hoping) that Brock Lesnar kills Kofi, takes his spot and wins the briefcase. I’m pulling for Kofi Kingston to be the winner. Kane is there because WWE. Orton and Sheamus barely exist and Neville and Ziggler are just there to fall from a high place needlessly. I really don’t expect a very good match, but I am at least looking forward to some possible drama leading up to the winner. The tag title match has me a bit curious, as I wonder how well The New Day and The PTP are going to gel inside the ring and if they will try to keep Darren and Titus’ momentum going by giving them the belts. Owens vs. Cena is going to be absolutely fantastic and I’ll be on the edge of my seat down the stretch just begging for Owens to win again. I want Paige to win the belt and hopefully spark a diva revolution in the summer (yeah, that’ll happen) and I hope Ryback makes quick work of Big Show. The short answer is yes, I’m excited for the PPV this weekend because WWE has the chance to make it a show that really matters. Whether they do it or not will define my satisfaction with the show.

Dino Zee: FACT – I’m a simple mark, and I like ladder matches. I also like the Ambrose/Rollins feud. I always look forward to Money in the Bank. Is Roman Reigns the lock to win that many feel he is? Will he cash in following the main event if he does indeed win the briefcase? Sure, it’s not all perfect (Ryback/Show might be atrocious), and while this certainly isn’t close to being the best WWE Card of the year, it should still give us some big time action. Yeah, I’m excited for Money in the Bank.

5. Roman Reigns will win the Money in the Bank match.

Nick Marsico: FACT – I want to see Kofi take it home, but I’m not quite that delusional. The last few weeks have been designed with Roman Reigns winning Money in the Bank specifically set to fall into place. He is either going to win thanks to Kane’s help and turn heel but hold onto the briefcase for a little while or he’ll win “without” Kane’s help and cash in on Ambrose and turn heel then. Either way, Reigns goes bad and Rollins’ title reign is in jeopardy. That, or they’ll just keep going bull headedly forward and give him the win and push ahead with Roman as a good guy, never gaining traction because all of his supposed supporting cast mates are better and more interesting than he is.

Dino Zee: FACT – Going by the formula, this would seem to be the case. Dolph has a feud with Rusev, and thus doesn’t need the briefcase. Orton and Sheamus have the same deal. Kane, Neville, and Kofi should be considered huuuuuuuuuuge longshots. That leaves our Hero with the Luscious Locks to earn another free pass to a World Title shot, right? I could try to talk myself into some other guy winning this, but it seems pretty clear to me: Reigns is winning Money in the Bank. The real intrigue, for me, is whether he cases in immediately, and whether he’s still a face by the end of the night.

6. While we all love wrestling, there are certain performers that we cannot stand. Who has instant “go away heat” with you these days and why?

Nick Marsico: The Big Show – Everybody will probably say Big Show and/or Kane, just like many people did in The 411 Top 5 column on Sunday. Kane has been absolutely fantastic in his role as The Authority’s right hand man, and has performed very well when left on his own as the de facto authority figure in charge. His appearances in the ring should be far more rare, but outside of that he’s a very welcome part of my weekly entertainment. Big Show, however, is just boring. He was boring when The Authority was making him cry and he stayed boring when he turned heel and sided with them. Recently he has become nothing more than a puppet for The Authority and Kane’s parrot. He’s actually gone from boring to annoying, come to think of it. He has been moving slowly in the ring again after looking surprisingly spry for a while, and he bogs down every segment he’s in. Put him in a tag team with R-Truth and you have my attention again. Outside of that he’s not even worthwhile to have around as a big dude that can be used to make strong dudes look extra strong. The Bellas are up there too and Randy Orton is creeping back into that territory for me, but nobody raises my ire these days as much as Big Show does.

Dino Zee: Davey Richards & Naomi – A near tie, though for very, very different reasons. I’ve not liked Davey for a while, dating to when I saw the Wolves on HD Net years back, and saw this Davey cat beating up wiry looking jobbers repeatedly, and then refusing to shake their hands until they earned his respect. That was the start. Just so pompous. Having seen more of his work, I just hate how he approaches wrestling. Atrocious and selective selling. Ridiculous offense (like that move where he kicks one opponent in the gut, then kicks the other opponent so that he’s now holding his partner, and then one more kick to force one opponent to DDT his partner). I basically can’t stand the dude, which is pretty hypocritical coming from an Alex Shelley fan. Well, deal with it. Naomi, on the other hand… she just elicits this horrible reaction from me. Face or heel, it doesn’t matter. Her stupid outfits. The way she gets shoehorned into the Usos for a couple weeks because Total Divas told us they’re married. The amount of times I have to hear about her “athleticism” while ignoring that she’s still not a great wrestler. Constant pushes. Horrible trash talk. She ain’t the worst diva, but man is she my least favorite.