wrestling / TV Reports

411’s TNA Impact Report 11.13.08

November 13, 2008 | Posted by Larry Csonka


In HD where available…

TNA Impact Begins…NOW!
-JB is with Foley and Jarrett as they discuss the Main Event Mafia sweeping turning point. Jarrett says there are wins and losses, and it is all about rebounding from the losses. Foley says he needs to give the kids hope, JB makes an Obama joke, which makes Foley get pissed and say he was embarrassed for the originals. He says guys like Alex Shelley have all of the talent in the world, but would rather joke about Foley’s ass instead of winning his match.

-After the video intro, Tenay and West welcome us to the show.

~A Pep Talk From Uncle Mick~
Foley makes his way to the ring and says Turning Point was not a stellar night for many of the TNA Originals. He calls out AJ Styles, Samoa Joe, the Motor City Machine Guns, Petey Williams, Eric Young, Jay Lethal, and Consequences Creed.

They all come out and Foley welcomes them to the ring. He says their efforts were great at the PPV and if it was about heart, talent and desire, they would be champions. But the truth is that you don’t win a world series with four strikeouts, and you don’t win respect with four losses at Turning Point. Foley then sees Shelley picking his nose and gets OFFENDED. Foley says Shelley need to understand the power of words. Like “in.”
It can mean so much. LOOK AT ME! You are a valuable piece of talent here in TNA, but you are not invaluable. I will deal with you next week Alex Shelley and that is a promise. Foley turns to AJ and says they all need to understand the power of words. Like Joe, Nash says he is the smartest man in wrestling. You beat his ass at the PPV, but he got the win. No more mistakes. AJ, Sting talked about respect, you went out there, and you didn’t win. There are always more chances, and you have to learn from your mistakes. If you don’t, the MEM will strike you out every time. This is a new horizon and Foley believes in 2nd chances. Eric Young earned a title shot against Bashir, and he gets it tonight. AJ, you are a talented guy, Joe, this is in writing in a book I published for another company, I said you were the best bad ass in the industry. You and AJ will challenge for the tag team titles tonight. And who thinks we should have a TNA World Title Match tonight? Black Machismo, you’re in! They will all get another chance, and all he asks them, as he skips over the Guns, is to hit it out of the park.

-We see Cage arriving earlier today. He has no choice but to join the MEM. They appear and welcome him to the family. They will give him a party like he has never seen, anything he wants. Tonight, he becomes a made man. Steiner gives him a suit and tells him to put it on. Nash smells Lauren and contemplates giving her a jackknife. Cage throws the suit away.

-Lauren is with ODB backstage, she is building a set. She is going to have a new talk show next week, and calls Lauren sugar tits.

Awesome Kong and Rhaka Khan w/Riesha Saeed vs. Roxxi and Taylor Wilde

They brawl on the ramp to kick things off. Kong tosses Wilde into the barrier and then into the ring. Khan and Roxxi brawl on the floor as Kong tosses Wilde across the ring. She chokes her out, to the corner and the corner splash by Kong. Tag to Khan, scoop slam on Wilde and then the knee drop follows. Khan covers for 2. To the corner and Khan chokes out Wilde, a suplex follows and she covers for 2. Tag back to Kong, a whip to the corner and Kong misses the charge, lung blower by Wilde and both ladies are down. Tag to Roxxi and rights and chops to Kong. A sleeper by Roxxi, but Khan breaks that up. Wilde in as well and things break down. Wilde and Roxxi double clothesline Khan, double dropkick to Kong. Roxxi slams Wilde onto Kong. Roxxi tosses Khan, and then whips Wilde to the floor and she brawls with Khan. Kong back up, beats down Roxxi. IMPLANT BUSTER and that is all.

Winner: Awesome Kong and Rhaka Khan @ 4:30 via pin

  • Not too bad of a match overall, due to Khan looking like she knew what she was doing for once. The constant jobbing of Roxxi isn’t doing her any favors though.
    RATING: *½

    -Lauren is with the Machine Guns. They discuss Turning Point, and they say that there will be losses. They say that AJ and Joe are in the front of the lines for some reason, and everyone else is at the end. They discuss Detroit and the old riots and the ruins that are left. They are the toughest, the most handsome and feel that they should be at the front of the line. Joe and AJ should take their lead, and win by any means necessary.

    -Saeed says that Kong wants competition. She tells Traci Brooks to go and find new opponents. This is a warning, if new opponents are not found, Kong will beat on innocent civilians. Even if it is the people that glorify the mouse. Lauren asks Khan why she ditched Wilde, and she asks, “who wouldn’t want to be on the side of the beast?”

    X-Division Title Match: Sheik Abdul Bashir © vs. Eric Young

    Bashir tries to intimidate referee Shane Sewell before the match. Bashir tries to attack at the bell, Young with a hip toss and then gets the belly-to-belly suplex for 2. Bashir with the drop toehold after moving the ref and then leys the boots to him. Neck crank by Bashir, rights follow and a cover for 2. Body scissors by Bashir, Young escapes and gets to his feet. Young slams Bashir to the corner, snap mare and then the charging forearm. A powerslam by Young gets 2. Knee to the gut by Bashir, off the ropes and a right and discus clothesline by Young. Rights in the corner, the ref pulls him off and Bashir then low blows Young. Bashir covers and Sewell will not count the three. He asks the fans about the low blow, and then argues with Sewell and then tosses him down. Sewell gets pissed and drops the shirt. He grabs Bashir and beats his ass. A slam on Bashir, dropkick and then a right. Young grabs Bashir, DVD! 1…2…3.

    Winner and NEW X-DIVISION CHAMPION Eric Young @ 4:00 via

  • Fine for the time given, but again it is another Impact title match that was not given time. Also, there is no way this stands, which just makes it all bullshit in the end. That’s saying something because I like the potential of the Sewell angle, but this wasn’t the right way to go about it.
    RATING: *

    -Lethal, Creed, Petey, and ODB come out to celebrate with Young as Earl Hebner tries to calm down Sewell.

    -We see a replay of Young winning the X-Division Title.

    -Lauren is with the TNA Originals, who are celebrating. Young dedicates the win to Foley as the Guns appeared to be bored. Young says it is their time to shine, it started as a dream, but tonight it is a reality. One down and two to go!

    -Tenay and West hype the rest of the show.

    -We get a Rough Cuts segment on LAX, focusing on Hernandez.

    -JB is with the MEM. JB mentions the X-Division victory for Young, and Angle says Young didn’t beat anyone in the MEM. They dominated Turning Point, and they will do so again tonight and then the party will continue. Petey enters the locker room and wants to talks to Steiner. Steiner says he will talk to him after his match, because now is the wrong time.

    -Lauren is with Jay Lethal and they discuss the title shot he has. He discusses Men on a Mission, and then turns to the time he defeated Kurt Angle. History is with him tonight. Petey wishes him luck tonight, and Lauren tells him to be careful when he talks to Steiner tonight. Petey says they are boys, and all will be well.

    -Kurt Angle heads to the commentary position for the match.

    Rhino vs. Scott Steiner w/Kurt Angle

    Angle puts over the MEM on commentary as the match begins. Lock up, to the corner and Steiner shoves Rhino. Rights by Rhino, off the ropes and a shoulder block to Steiner. Off the ropes again, counters, chops by Rhino and then Steiner gets a boot to Rhino, followed by the overhead belly to belly for 2. Steiner chokes out Rhino in the corner, chops follow, off the ropes and a clothesline, elbow drop and then the pushups by Steiner. To the corner, more chops by Steiner and then the whip. Back elbow by Rhino, Steiner rakes the eyes but Rhino comes back with the TKO. Both men are down, they fight to their feet and Rhino with rights, off the ropes and a flying clothesline connects. To the corner, shoulder block by Rhino, a belly to belly follows that and Rhino sets for the gore. Angle gets up and grabs Rhino’s leg. Steiner over, TBONE suplex on Rhino and that is all.

    Winner: Scott Steiner @ 4:30 via pin

  • It wasn’t bad, but it also wasn’t very good. I still say that Steiner came back too early, as he is apparently having some troubles running the ropes and at one time almost tripped over his own feet. Coming back too soon from an ACL injury isn’t a smart move.
    RATING: *½

    -JB is backstage with Sting. They discuss his title defense Jay Lethal in a few minutes. Sting says he has heard it all, it was Joe’s night, it was AJ’s night, and now it is Lethal’s night. But the chinks in the armor are there, and when they notice it after a few losses, they will crumble. That’s the difference between boys, and men.

    -JB does the super special ring announcing.

    TNA World Title Match: Sting © vs. Jay Lethal

    Lock up to begin, to the corner and Sting breaks, but Jay with jabs and rights. To another corner, more jabs, more rights and then a whip off the ropes, dropkick by Jay. Off the ropes and a clothesline by Jay gets 2. Up top he goes, double ax smash and a cover for 2 again. Mounted rights by Jay in the corner, Jay gets sent to the apron and then gets a springboard missile dropkick. Sting to the floor, and a suicide dive by Jay! Sting is limping a bit, rolls into the ring and Jay is in control as we head to a commercial @ 2:00.

    Back from commercial @ 6:00 as Sting has taken control. Clothesline by Sting, a suplex follows and then a fist drop. Sting still is struggling with the knee, Jay rolls to the floor and Sting follows. He slams Jay to the barrier and the Guns have made their way to the ring. Back into the ring they go, and Sting locks in the chinlock. Jay elbows out, Sting with rights and Jay is able to escape the back suplex and then gets a clothesline. Another and then the hp toss, cartwheel into the dropkick combo gets 2. Rights by Jay, chops, off the ropes and as Jay gets a leapfrog, he hits the ropes and then collides with Sting. Shelley distracts the ref, Sabin in and holds Sting. Jay refuses to break the rules and tosses Sabin. Sting gets a kick to the back and then the scorpion death drop for the pin.

    Winner: Sting @ 10:00 via pin

  • It was a pretty good match, even with the four-minutes cut out of the middle. I am enjoying the Guns attitude change as an extra dynamic to the MEM vs. Originals angle. Also, I loved that Lethal refused to win dirty in an ode to the really old school face.
    RATING: **¼

    -Joe and AJ are out and they are NOT pleased with the Guns. Creed, Young and ODB come to keep the peace. Because when I think cool, calm and collected, I think ODB.

    -After a cut in for the video game awards, we see the MEM beating the shit out of Petey Williams. Steiner then tosses Petey off of a ladder, to prove than the mentor/pupil relationship is over.

    -After a replay, we see the TNA Originals checking on Petey Williams, who is BUSTED WIDE OPEN! GOOD GAWD ALMIGHTY SLOBBERKNOCKER~!

    -JB is with Beer Money! Jackie covers JB’s mouth as Roode acts who Foley thinks he is. They are the champions, the greatest tag team in the sport today. Foley can’t tell them what to do, as a matter of fact Mick, Roode will buy and sell him 10-times, even with recent stock market losses. Roode tells him to hit the road, and Strom sings. He then says that AJ and Joe need to concentrate on them, and not their soap opera business. They have their mind on their money and their money on their beer. IT IS ON THE SHIRT! TREMENDOUS!

    -We get a Jeff Jarrett video package.

    -Tenay says that this is a chance for the TNA Originals to get back on track. Now while they aren’t unified with “the good guys,” what exactly would you classify Roode and Strom?

    -Storm has a one of those coolers you ride!

    TNA World Tag Team Title Match: Beer Money © w/Miss Jackie vs. Samoa Joe and AJ Styles

    Storm and AJ to begin. AJ in control with the side headlock, to the corner and shoulder blocks by Storm. Off the ropes, float over and a slam by AJ. The knee drop lands and AJ tags in Joe. Storm rams Joe to the corner, Roode tags in and delivers chops to Joe. Jabs by Joe, a whip and a back elbow and Enziguri connect. Chops by Joe, tag to AJ and they shoot Roode off the ropes, double back elbow. They go after Storm, double hip toss and they toss Beer Money to the floor. Team 3D makes their way to the ring to join the commentary team as we head to a commercial @ 2:00.

    Back from commercial @ 6:00 as AJ gets a side back breaker on Roode for 2. Roode battles back with rights as 3D is with the announce team. AJ to the apron, he nails Storm, but as he slingshots in Roode catches him with a knee to the gut. Roode slams AJ to the corner, Storm tags in and beats down AJ. Off the ropes and a high knee by Storm connects. A tag to Roode, off the ropes and Roode slams AJ down, elbows by Storm and Roode covers for 2. Roode works a bear hug on AJ, AJ then escapes and as he dives for a tag Roode catches AJ. Enziguri by AJ! Storm in and knocks Joe to the floor and then tosses AJ to the floor. Roode and Jackie beat down AJ, he gets rolled back in and Storm covers for 2. Knees by Storm as Ray says they belong in the MEM, and they are complete with out them. Double suplex, BEER! MONEY! Rights by Storm, he then goes for the whirly bird, AJ escapes and gets the PELE~! AJ tags Joe, Roode in as well and Joe begins to clean house. Samoan Drop to Storm, head butts to Roode, powerbomb into the neck breaker! PLANCHA by AJ to Storm on the floor! Snap slam by Joe on Roode and a cover for 2. Roode rakes the eyes of Joe, rights now and Jackie and Storm toss AJ to the barrier. Roode up top, Enziguri by Joe. MUSCLE BUSTER is stopped by Storm. Ray up and blows beer into the face of Storm, and we get a DQ finish.

    Winner: Beer Money @ 12:00 via DQ

  • This was a really fun match and was heading great places until the finish of the evening came to life.
    RATING: ***

    -After the match AJ and Joe argue with Team 3D.

    -Who is Suicide?

    -Cute Kip and the Beautiful People are here to say that they admire Sarah Palin. She is a fashionisha, but she spent $150,000 of her money on a new wardrobe. Anyone who does that deserves a position with the Beautiful People. If she accepts, they will give her $50,000 for a charity of her choice. They then say she has heat with some people for buying a tanning bed, but if she joins them, she can tan with them all she wants. Love says if she joins, she will know what it is like to be a part of a winning team.

    ~Christian Becomes a Made Man ~
    The Main Event Mafia make their way to the ring. Angle says it is with great joy that they welcome Christian Cage to the Main Event Mafia. He asks Cage to come to the ring, and here he comes. Cage is of course not wearing the suit they gave him since he threw it away.

    They are not happy that he doesn’t have the suit on, and Angle says that rule #1 is if they give him a suit, he wears it. While Cage has had his differences with everyone in the ring, they are here to welcome him to their family. Family is helping your brothers and sister out, no matter what. Family is having a bond with your brothers and sister, tighter than any you have had before, even tighter than the one with your wife. Family is commitment, is Scott Steiner who had a career ending injury and came back to be their hit man. Commitment is Booker and Nash, getting offers from all over the world and refusing them to stay here in TNA to make it the best. But Angle is concerned about Cage. He and his attorney refused to negotiate with TNA, and in a few weeks when his contract expires, Cage will return to the WWE. That he is tired of being the big fish in TNA. Nash and Booker had the offer, but they stayed. Now they all had the offer, but when it comes down to it, Cage is here for a certain reason. This isn’t a welcoming party, but a going away party. The punks in the back won’t help you either. Angle hopes his trip up north is worth the ass kicking he is about to get.

    Cage attacks Angle, but the numbers game get to him and the MEM whoop his ass Horsemen style. Top rope belly to belly by Steiner! Booker then gets the AX kick. Angle talks shit to Cage as Nash loses the coat and rolls up the sleeves to deliver a powerbomb on Cage. Angle then gets the Angle slam. The Main Event Mafia stands tall to close the show.

    *End scene.

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    Larry Csonka

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