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411’s WWE RAW Report 3.23.15

March 23, 2015 | Posted by Tony Acero

411’s LIVE WWE Raw Report 3.23.15
* Welcome.

Do ya smell it…?

THE MANIA?

DO YA?!

RAW!
IS!
MANIA!!!

We learn Brock and Reigns will have a face off tonight, then learn that both Snoop and Simmons are in the howse! Show starts right away with the sound of a crow. Sting is here, and he’s got something to say. Sting grins. We get a nice little chant for the guy. He finally understands what it feels like to kick off RAW. Gives us a WOOOO, then says he’s been known as the WCW Soldier, and over the last 14 years, he’s watch HHH get to the top with manipulation and backstabbing all to get to the very top. Triple H must think he’s unstoppable, riht? As if there aren’t any consequences, and although Sting is the last soldier standing, he isn’t here to fight for WCW. He’s here for one specific reason, and that’s to take Triple H down.

With that, the lady whom Triple H has taken down comes out. Steph and her bra-vado come down. She wants to welcome Sting to the big time. Here he is standing in the middle of a WWE ring with Stephanie McMahon. Sting says she is also that spoiled little brat who has had everything handed to her, yet somehow believes that she earned it – but hey, nice to finally meet you. Steph understands why he may be lashing out, he must be intimidated. In WCW, Sting was a big fish in a small pond, but in the WWE he’s a minnow in the ocean. Steph is the daughter of the man who killed Sting’s career. She’ll give Sting credit, she admires his loyalty. Sting never thought of leaving WVW. They never even got a phone call. Not once. But dogs are kind of loyal, too. And sure, dogs can learn a lot of tricks, but dogs are kind of stupid. She would compare Sting to a dog, but doesn’t want to insult canines. WCW lost. Sting lost. He lost his integrity and pride. And this Sunday, he’ll lose any respect people have for him. Steph says he’s nothing more than a face painted freak. Sting WOOS. Steph is about to do some damage, but Sting grabs her hand. This brings out the the hubby!! He heads out, loosening his tie, and heading down the ramp. Sting turns while Steph heads out of the ring. Sting is ready for him. Triple H checks on the wrist of his wife. He then goes under the ring to grab him a sledgie. Not one to be upstaged, Sting has his bat. He swings it like a mad man. Triple H is on the apron. Sting notions towards the equalizers. Triple H opts to make a move, as Booker says, but he’s not having it.

Sting removes his jacket while Triple H heads up the ramp. He calls Triple H out. Triple H strongly considers it, but backs out. Steph holds Triple H back, not allowing him in the ring, and that’s all she wrote.

-Commercial Break-

Barrett is on commentary, and already he’s great.

Match 1: R-Truth and Dean Ambrose vs Luke Harper and Stardust
Ambrose and Harper to start. Go behind from Ambrose, but Harper with the side headlock takedown. Ambrose back up and uses some wrasslin to get Harper down, only for Harper to reverse and pull Ambrose down hard. Ambrose hits the ropes and knocks Harper down . He hits some rights then sends Harper in the corner. Harper is sent into the ropes. He reverses. Ambrose trips him up. Cover for 1…2..NO! Ambrose with a bulldog out of the corner. Cody hops in and tries to attack, so Truth joins the fun and sends Cody over the top rope. Harper to follow!

We’re back, and Cody has Ambrose choked up from behind. Ambrose tries to fight out, R-Truth helps with some crowd motivation. Cody shoves Ambrose in the corner, but Ambrose fights out, only to turn into an Alabama Slammer from Cody. Pin for 1…2.NO! Cody locks the arm and tags in Harper. Harper steps on the chest of Ambrose then pulls back on the face of Ambrose. Harper with an uppercut, then he hangs up Ambrose on the ropes for dressing the same as him. Cover for 1…2.NO! Harper with a front faced headlock. Gator roll into a side headlock. Ambrose tries to fight out, stands and turns into the hold. Rights and lefts to the gut. The hold is broken. Ambrose hits the ropes. He runs right into a side slam from Harper! Ouch! Pin for 1…2..NO! Barrett claims his Side Slam (Winds of Change) is stronger. Nicely done. Tag to Cody, who hits Ambrose in the chin. Ambrose in on the top rope, thanks to Harper. Stardust hops up and goes for a Superplex, but Ambrose is able to send him down to the mat. Ambrose runs and tags in Harper. Harper shoves Ambrose off the top rope to the outside. He eyeballs Barrett then sends Ambrose back in the ring. Ambrose heads back out, though, and clotheslines Harper down! Ambrose in the ring at 4. Harper follows. He runs into an elbow. Ambrose with a Tornado DDT to Harper! Both men down. Cody runs the ropes like a confused hamster. Harper with the tag! Ambrose with the tag!

Truth comes in with a clothesline, another! Spinning elbow! THE SPLITS! Splash in the corner! WHAT’S UP! Truth with a kick! He hits the front suplex! Pin for 1…2.NO! Harper breaks it up! Ambrose off the ropes with a clothesline!! He ducks one from Cody and hits a suicide dive to Harper on the outside!

Stardust turns to Truth! Pay Dirt! Pin for 1…2…3!!!
Official Result: R-Truth and Dean Ambrose
Rating: **
Kind of paint by the numbers

Barrett heads up the ramp quickly so as to not be robbed. In the ring, Truth does a little dance, then welcomes Ambrose to join in. Ambrose does…something. Ambrose and Truth stand like best buds in the ring while we head to choosing Randy Orton’s opponent. Our choices are Big Show, Kane, or Seth and J&J.

-Commercial Break-

We return back to the show where Renee Young is at the top of the ramp with some dudes representing the Special Olympics.

Afterwards, we get a video package of Reigns vs Brock, complete with Heyman promos making it oh so awesome.

Cole brings up Bill Simmons, and his issues with JBL. We get some tweets of the back and forths between Simmons and JBL.

Earlier today, Miz and Sandow interviewed Farrell and Hart about their new movie Get Hard. Ferrell and Hart both give props to Stunt Doubles. It’s actually pretty great.

Simmons is on commentary for the next match, which means we will be paying more attention to them than the match at hand.

Match 2: The Miz, Damien Sandow, Adam Rose, The Ascension vs Titus O’Neil, Darren Young, Erick Rowan, Ryback, and Zack Ryder
Miz and Titus to start. Side headlock from Miz. He locks it hard, but Titu sends Miz into the ropes. Titus catches him and hits a backbreaker, then a fallaway slam. Tag to Young. Young with a front suplex, then he grabs the head of The Miz. Miz hits a jawbreaker. Sandow wants a tag, but Miz tags in Rose. Young sends Rose into the ropes. Young hops over, and runs into a hard right hand from Young. Inverted Atomic Drop and a swinging neckbreaker. Cover for 1…NO! Young backs into the corner and tags in Rowan. Rowan with a right hand to the gut. Headbutt from Rowan. Rowan gets Rose in the corner and attacks the chest then hits a fallaway slam of his own. Simmons shows some actual wrestling knowledge. Tag to Ryder. Ryder hits the Broskii Boot. He gets distrated long enough for Rose to hit a clothesline and tag in Conor. Conor sends Ryder in the corner and stomps. Blind tag from Viktor. Stomps. Right hand to the midsection. Body slam then a tag to Conor. They double team Ryder until Conor covers but Young is there to break it up. Uppercut from Conor. Tag to Rose. Simmons asks a question that focuses the match. How nice. Ryder reaches for a tag, and Rose stops him. Tag from Sandow. Blind tag, I might add. Crowd cheers. Sandow hits the backbreaker/neckbreaker combo and kips up while Simmons calls it “Single White Female with Wrestling” haha. Miz demands a tag, gets it. He sends Ryder into the ropes. Ryder comes back with a faceplant. Ryder reaches for a tag! He gets onew! Ryback is in!!

Whip to Miz. Thesz Press from Ryback. Ryback sends Miz into the mat a few times then hits a spinebuster! Ryback in the corner. FEED ME MORE!! Rose enters, and is guerilla pressed for the fun of it. Ascension comes in and Ryback hits a double meathook!! Miz attacks form behind then stomps in the corner.

Miz backs him up as he celebrates, Miz flies with a clothesline, but is HIT with a Meathook!!! Shell Shock from Ryback! Pin for 1…2…3!!!
Official Result: Darren Young, Titus O’Neil, Erick Rowan, Zack Ryder, Ryback
Rating: **
I think people cared about two people in this match…

Commentary has Simmons shill The Network for them, then totally cut him out of the scene as they focus on JBL, Cole, and Booker.

-Commercial Break-

Booker T announces that tonight, Randy Orton will face….

Rollins and J&J with 77% of the vote.

Match 3: Randy Orton vs Rollins and J&J Security
Looks like Mercury and Orton to start. Lockup. Orton slams Mercury down like nothing, then demands Rollins. Rollins opts to give in to orton’s demands, but Mercury tags in Noble. Noble gets kicked right in the gut then taken down hard. Orton stomps the foot, then the other, next is the hand – or was that a forehead scrape? I dunno. Either way, Orton sends Jamie out of the ring like nothing. Rollins turns, and Orton grabs him by the hair, pulling him up on the apron. Mercury distracts, and Rollins hits a kick from the apron! Noble heads back in and clips the leg of Orton. Noble with stomps. Kicks to the back, and an elbow drop to the top of the spine. Noble gets in the face of Orton, so Orton hits a clothesline. Mercury runs in and gets a clothesline for his trouble. Orton goes to attack Seth, but Seth hops off the apron. Orton sends Mercury to the outside then hits a pwoerslam to Mercury! Orton sends Joey tro the apron! Noble is up! Orton grabs the head of both men! DOUBLE DDT OFF THE ROPES!! Rollins on the outside, watches in dispair. Orton hears the voices.

He pounds the mat, and Rollins runs in looking for the Curb Stomp! Orton deflects, goes to attack, but Rollins heads to the outside! Orton with the RKO to Noble!!! Pin for 1…2…3!!!
Official Result: Randy Orton
Rating: *1/2
Nice way to tease the tension, but no reason for the poll aspect of it all.

Last week, John Cena had an interview on WWE.com where he stated that come Mania, the Universe is going to see a man that believes in something. He is going to Mania to stop all this and take back the US Title so that the USA can have a rep they can be proud of. America is the elite, because we bust our ass to be the elite. We will not waiver, and Cena wants to be that ambassador. Wrestlemania isn’t about Cena, it’s about shutting up Rusev and bringing back the title where it belongs.

Tonight, Rusev takes on Jack Swagger. Remember that guy?

Backstage, Paige is fixin up her makeup when the most beautiful woman in the world walks up. She brings up the fact that NIkki is offering either one of them a title match tonight, and AJ feels they are trying to divide Paige and AJ. If Nikki is going to offer the title match, Paige will take it. AJ says it’s not about that, she doesnt want Paige to fall into a trap. Paige says that if AJ is going to turn down a Championship match, that makes her CRAZY. Apparently, Paige doesn’t know that “Crazy” is my and AJ’s safe word…and by safe, I mean all bets are off.

-Commercial Break-

Match 4: Divas Championship Match
Paige (w/ AJ) vs Nikki Bella

Lockup to start. Nikki backs Paige into the ropes. The ref breaks it up. Paige runs with a spear like takedown and some right hands. She sends Nikki against the ropes, then hangs her up and hits those vicious boob busting knees to Nikki while Brie watches. Paige’s scream sends Nikki to the outside. Brie helps her out a bit, while Paige awaits Nikki in the ring. The camera lingers on AJ for a bit, and I feel funny. Paige with a right to Nikki, then locks the head. Nikki shots the legs and pushes Paige around then knocks hetr down hard. Nikki does some push ups while talking shit. Nikki gets in position for a rollup and Paige gets 1…2..NO! Nikki quickly rolls out of the ring. Paige follows. Paige with a clothesline off the apron!! Paige sends Nikki back into the ring and locks the head, but Nikki hits a knee, then another to the head! Pin for 1…2..NO! And we get a commercial break…

We’re back, and Nikki has a cravat locked on Paige. AJ cheers her on. Paige turns into the hold. Hits the ropes. She runs right into a spinebuster! Pin for 1…2.NO! Hi AJ. Nikki pushes the face of Paige a little bit then sends her into the ropes. Paige fires back with a knee, then we get a double clothesline in the middle of the ring!!! Both girls up at 6, but Paige is here to send her down with a short clothesline! Again! One more! DROPKICK to Nikki! Pin for 1…2…NO! Nikki struggles to stand in the corner. Nikki is up. She goes for a move in the corner but Nikki hits a knee in the corner then springboards with a….something. Pin for 1…2..NO!!! Nikki looks to be up first. She removes her scrunchie, so you know it’s bidness now. Nikki serves up her right hand like shes’ Big Show, misses a right hand, and Paige hits a hard kick to the face!! Pin for 1…..2…NO!!! Oooo, so close. Paige crawls towards Nikki and locks the head. Suplex try, but Nikki turns it into a rollup for 1…2…NO!! Paige up! Kick to the gut. Nikki with the Alabama Slam!!! Nikki with a pin! 1…2….NO!!! Nikki is furious. She grabs Paige, sets up for the Rack Attack. Paige kicks down, locks the head! RAMPAGE!! PIN for 1….2…NO!!!!! Nikki kicked out! AJ yells for Paige to get back at it! She grabs the leg. Nikki kicks her away. Paige tries for a spear, but ends up diving out of the ring along with Nikki! AJ is here to prevent Brie from interrupting!! Paige goes to grab AJ, but AJ sends an elbow to the back and hits Paige square in the face!! Uh oh….

Nikki sends Paige into the ring! Rack Attack to Paige! Pin for 1…2…3!!!
Official Result: Nikki Bella
Rating: **1/2
Nikki still shows a lot of moments of sloppiness, but this is one of the better Divas matches in a long, long time.

AJ seems apologetic. She hesitantly heads into the ring and goes to comfort Paige, but Paige shoots the legs and attacks AJ!!! AJ turns it around and mounts Paige!! Hands galore! The ref breaks them up. AJ is breathing heavily. mmmmm.

We’re taken back to Smackdown where Dolph and Bryan did their thing in the ring like it was the blue brand in 2006. Ziggler wins the match with a Zig Zag to send us back to RAW. IN case you’re interested, we’re getting Bryan and Ziggler again tonight, with one of the other five men in the match come Mania as a referee.

-Commercial Break-

Snoop Dogg is here with the Divas that don’t matter. The saunter down like The Godfather is watching…watching in a depressing, depressing manner. Snoop on the mic. He says Snoopmania is in the building tonight. He says this Sunday, Cali is the home of Wrestlemania. Snoop’s been to a few of them, and he’s here to let us know that this thing is going to be —-

Snoop is cut off by Curtis Axel! haha. Axel says not to change the channel. Snoopmania? Nah, Snoopdizzle, it’s called Axelmania. This isn’t a West Coast thing, an East Coast thing, nah, it’s a Worldwide thing. Axelmania is running wild in Los Angeles. Axel: “Bow wow wow, yipee yo, yipee yay. Axelmania is here to stay.”

Snoop says “So you that clown that’s been poppin off on Twitter?” Snoop says he’s ready. You want to talk about all the Manias? There’s one thing that Axel is missing, and that’s the most important one of all….

HULKAMANIA! Hulk is here!

While he makes his entrance, let me just say that Turkey Burgers suck. Like, really. I’m on this health kick recently, and I added turkey burgers to my diet. I hate it. Where’s the beef?

Anyway, Hogan is in the ring. He soaks in some cheers then wants to tell his brother something. He’s got a little story. When he pressed Andre over his head in front of 999 thousand people, he knew Hulkamania would live forever. He knew Snoop would be forever, too, after his first LP. As far as Axelmania, “what’s this brother smokin over here?”

Axel rips his shirt off. He points to Hogan. WHATCHA GONNA DO! Hogan blocks a right hand. Snoop grabs Axel and sends him to the outside! Snoop rips his shirt, scaring numerous people, but luckily there’s a Hulkamania shirt underneath. Snoop and Hogan do a pose in the middle of the ring, and Snoop makes Hogan look like a giant. No, seriously, stop it Snoop. haha.

-Commercial Break-

Match 5: Tyson Kidd and Cesaro vs Los Matadores
Cesaro and Mat 1 to start. Theey lockup. Ferny is confirmed to start. Cesaro knocks Fernando down and pins for 1. Ferny sends Cesaro to the ropes, reversed, hits a cross body. Pin for 1. Tag to El Torito, and it appears this is a six man, so I’ll change that shortly. Nattie is in with El Torito. She is ready to go, but Tyson tags her out. Tyson and the other Matador is in. Pin from Diego for 1. Kick to Kidd, then Diego goes for a splash. Kidd moves, though, and Diego runs into the ropes. Tag to Cesaro. Pin for 1. Cesaro with a cravat from behind. Diego with hits to the gut but Cesaro hits a knee. Tag to Kidd. Swing into a dropkick. Pin for 1. But it is broken up! Cravat from behind! Kidd cinches the hold. Diego turns into it. Kidd hits ak nee. Whip to the corner, but Diego hits an elbow. Another to Cesaro. Tyson hops over on the apron and hangs up Diego. Kidd flies off the top rope….into a dropkick!! Both men down! Tag to Cesaro. Tag to Fernando. Uppercut. ANother. Tag to El Torito. El Torito hops over Fern and crotches Cesaro. A dropkick helps the momentup and El Torito gets a pin for 1…2.NO! Tag to oneof the Matadors who hits the ropes, and flies atop Cesaro. Kidd is there to send him to the outside. El Torito sends Kidd out of the ring. Cesaro rolls out. Nattie with a tag. She hits a Discus (Disqus?) punch and pins for 1…2..NO!!!

El Torito up top! He rolls Nattie up! Pin for 1…2…3!!!
Official Result: Los Matadores
Rating: *
Nope, still don’t buy them as credible.

Backstage, Kane wants to talk to Barrett. He gleams and teases Barrett about being unable to hold onto the title. Kane says Barrett will have to hand over the title tonight due to him having to hang it for Mania. As Director of Operations, he is authorized to strip Barrett of his title if he does not hand it over. Barrett calls this a tragedy, and hands over the title. Kane takes the title, then says all Barrett has to do is beat 6 other superstars in a ladder match.

“It’s My Bloody Title.”

Next, Swagger vs Rusev.

Match 6: Jack Swagger vs Rusev
Swagger with a go behind. Rusev hits an elbow to break it. He sends Swagger into the corner. Rusev grabs the head and sends Swagger chest first into the corner. Rusev with a kick to the back. Another. Right hands send Swagger down. The corner cam is very porno-esque. Rusev is pushed back by the ref, so Swagger takes advantage, hits some rights. He sends Rusev into the corner, but Rusev heads out of the corner with a shoulder to Swagger. WE WANT LANA! Rusev with a kick to the head. Another. Stomp to the chest. Rusev with a hard kick to the back of Swagger. Rusev with Tazmission like hold. Swagger is super tall. Rusev drops Swagger down to the mat, cinching in the hold. Swagger with an elbow to finally break the hold. Rusev with a kick. Whip to the corner. Swagger with the legs up. Hard right to the head by Swagger. Another. Rusev piushes, but misses a clothesline. Big Boot from Swagger! Swagger with a clothesline in the corner. Another. Swagger bomb attempt, but Rusev is up!! SUPERKICK- NO!! Swagger grabs the ankle! Rusev pushes away, but Swagger grabs and slams Rusev down!! Pin for 1…NO! Rusev in the corner. Swagger mounts, but Rusev ducks and clips the leg. Swagger locked up in the corner, so Rusev attacks the back. Rusev hops on the apron and clotheslines Swagger down hard. Rusev waits for Swagger to stand. HARD superkick to the jaw!! Nicely done, Rusev. Rusev calls for CRUSH, and it’s nowhere near Lana quality.

Rusev locks in The Accolade. Swagger taps.
Official Result: Rusev
Rating: **
Poor Swagger. A great hand, but so bland.

Rusev refuses to break the hold. Cole mentions that there is no Lana to break the hold. Rusev will NOT let go! Cena’s music hits! HERE HE COMES! His shirt is off! Rusev shoots the legs and mounts Rusev. Rusev tosses Cena. Cena mounts again! He hits some hard rights. Rusev tosses Cena away once again, to the outside. Rusev sends Cena into the barricade! Rusev stands tall as Cena struggles to get up. Rusev grabs Cena and sends him into the steel post. Rusev lifts Cena again, and tosses him over the announce table. Cena flies over the table into the nice, plush chair of Michael Cole. Rusev grabs his flag and raises it high.

Rusev isn’t done. He heads back towards Cena. KICK TO THE FACE! Rusev clears the announce table. JBL calls Rusev a “Crazy Russian” in the calmest voice known to man. Rusev grabs Cena by the legs, reverse wheelbarrows him onto the announce table! Rusev hops on the table himself, and looks for The Accolade. He stomps the back of Cena. Rusev locks in The Accolade. Refs surroiund the brute, while Cena lays completely knocked out next to a red sharpie. See, it’s red because…Communism.

We’re back to the show, and perhaps showing Cena launching himself in slow-motion isn’t the best idea.

Cole and Co are chattin up about what happened before they are cut off by Bray Wyatt. Wyatt is here live instead of his usual recorded earlier stuffs. His fireflies are in abundance. Wyatt looks about in the crowd and grins.

Why, oh, why do people hide from the truth? Because you’re afraid? Is it because you’re embarrassed to show the world who you truly are? I understand. Reality can be a very difficult pill to swallow, but it doesn’t change the fact that each of you is guilty. Because the truth is that somewhere in there, deep down, you hate the person you have become. You hate your job. All you can see is the color green. You wake up, look in the mirror, and don’t like the person staring back at you. So you cover it up with makeup as if it’s going to cover up all the ugliness inside of you. It doesn’t change the fact that you are all liars.

I’m not like you; I am not a liar. I may be a lot of things, but I am not a liar. My tongue is the sword of truth, and it cuts through the deception. I speak the truth that you all try to hide from. The truth is, The Undertaker is just like you – a liar. He tries to hide the fact that he’s lost. Tries to deny the fact that he wants so desperately for his soul to be set free. Don’t you worry about a thing, Undertaker. The angel with the burnt wings has been sent to take you back to the other side.

Uh oh…

Lightning and thunder.

There it is, that mystical aura you are all addicted to. These spirits no longer operate by your command, they belong to me now. EVERYTHING belongs to me now! I control the light and the darkness, and these demons all march to my command! I judge the dead, the living, and I have judged you Undertaker. You are guilty!! At Wrestlemania, there will be no redemption or shield for you to be taken out on. The only thing will be your fate sealed by Sister Abigail’s cute, and against your will, I will take my rightful place among the gods as the new face of Fear. At Wrestlemania, you’ll get the mercy that you so desparately have been begging for. At Wrestlemania, you an finally…

REST IN PEACE!

Bray does the Taker pose.

Well….shit.

-Commercial Break-

Kevin Nash is announced as the final entrant into the Hall of Fame. The video package focuses on his coolness, not his quads, so it lasts for a few minutes.

Backstage, Nattie is fixin her makeup. There is a divider in the room. On the other side, Tyson has his beats on and enters with a Burger King bag. He sweet talks the food, while Nattie thinks she is talking to him. Nattie feels loved, then heads around the divide, allowing Tyson Kidd to do a pretty funny shill of Chicken Fries from Burger King. Nattie grabs one, and now she needs a moment.

Match 7: Daniel Bryan vs Dolph Ziggler
Special Guest Referee: Dean Ambrose

We get a stalemate to start. Bryan gets the upperhand of the second lockup then hits a headlock takedown. Another tit for tat. Test of strength. They go Greco on us and scrape foreheads. Bryan gets Ziggler down. Bryan twists then sends Ziggler over his back. Bryan with a stomp to Ziggler’s arm. Bryan with an uppercut. He has Ziggler in the corner. ANother uppercut. Ziggler grabs Bryan, sends Ziggler into the corner. Right hands sends Bryan down. Ziggler with a snapmare out of th corner. Elbow and a pin for 1…2.NO! Ziggler with a side headlock. Ziggler sends Bryan in the corner. Breaks the hold, then smacks Ziggler hard. Ziggler doesnt like that. They get real crazy with it and fight it out. Ambrose loves it. Ziggler whips Bryan in the corner. Bryan hops over. Bryan on the apron. He head scissors Ziggler down to the outside. Bryan wants a suicide dive, but instead, he hits a dropkick through the ropes. Bryan on the apron. He runs, goes for a knee. ZIggler ducks. CLOTHESLINE OVER THE TIMEKEEPER’S AREA!!

We are back, in the middle of the ring, and Ziggler has a sleeper hold on Bryan. Bryan backs into the corner, squashing Zigler. Rollup gets a 2. German Suplex into a pin for 1…2..NO! Bryan is up. He gets to the top rope, but Ziggler hits the ropes, and crotches Bryan. Ziggler goes up for a superplex. He locks the head, raises the arm. Ziggler tugs, but Bryan fights out. He hits some rights to the gut. He sends Ziggler to the floor, but Ziggler runs right back up! Sloppy looking X-Factor! Pin for 1…2..NO!!! Bryan reaches to get up. Ziggler is up, too. Ziggler misses a clothesline and Bryan goes for a backslide. He’s got one knee down. No, Ziggler reverses and gets a backslide of his own! 1…2..NO! Bryan up! Boot to the face! Pin for 1…2..NO!! Ambrose is a bit quick on the count! Bryan is seething. Ziggler is struggling to stand. Bryan brings him up. Kicks in the corner. Yes! Yes! Yes! Bryan hits the corner, runs, and hits a dropkick in the corner!

Bryan goes for one more but Ziggler hits a SUPERKICK!!! ZIG ZAG!!! Pin for 1….2…3!!!
Official Result: Dolph Ziggler
Rating: ***
Of course, it was a solid outing.

Ambrose raises the hand of Ziggler…..then DIRTY DEEDS!!! This brings out everyone involved with the IC title match, and a ladder! Shit gets crazy, and all men are down.

-Commercial Break-

We return to RAW and Brock is here with his manager. Brock looks all kinds of intense. Heyman on the stick. His name is Paul Heyman, y’all, and he’s the advocate for the reigning, defending, undisputed WWE Heavyweight Champion of the World……

BAHROCK! LESNAR!

He says “yak” about 42 times. Come on, if he hasn’t sold us yet on a reason to watch Reigns come down in the main event this Sunday and take his beating like a man at the hands of Brock Lesnar, there’s nothing that he can say tonight to persuade us to subscribe to the WWE Network and tune in to Mania this SUnday. Nothing. If we don’t think we’re going to get our money’s worth to witness Brock beat down Reigns like no one has ever done before, then there’s nothing he can say. If you’re looking for a fight, though, then he swears to us that this Sunday, we’ll get our money’s worth. It comes down to this: either Brock Lesnar is everything Heyman says he is, or he isn’t. Reigns is either everything they hype him up to be, or he isn’t. That’s it. Period. Exclamation Point. Someone will be right, and someone will be wrong. There will be a winner and a loser. Last year, Heyman said Brock vs The Streak. We said he can’t and he won’t. Heyman said he will and he did. Summerslam? We said he can’t and won’t. Heyman says he can and so he did. Cena isn’t in the main event of Mania this year, Brock Lesnar is. Cena isn’t ending this show, Brock Lesnar is. Here’s a secret for Reigns – Brock is an intensely passionate competitor who loves being WWE Champion almost as much as he loves sadistically beating the ass of any man that tries to take that title away from him. Reigns may as well kick down Brock’s door, take his wife, remove food off his plate, watch his tv, drive his car, and rename his sons “REIGNS” if he wants to take that tiel from Brock Lesnar. That’s the type of man you have to be. This is not a man, this is a beast, who will do everything he just claimed to Reigns. That’s a conqueror and Brock conquers everything before him, and this Sunday Brock will conquer the main event of Mania. Reigns can come and say all that. Reigns says “I can and I will,” but this Sunday at Mania, Brock says “you can’t, and you won’t.”

Heyman exits the ring. Reigns is super serious. He stares down Brock. Glares at the title. Reigns snatches the title off of Brock’s shoulder, then holds it high. He stares at Brock. Brock grabs the belt, and we get a tug of war over the title, as both men have a strong hold on the title. Neither lets go, and….

that’s it?

No, really. That’s it….?

Guys….

wow…

Anyways, be sure to check out my podcast starting in 15 minutes!

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