411’s WWE Raw Report 8.11.08

We get a video package of last week’s tag title change.

Raw starts now!

Michael Cole and Jerry Lawler are our commentators for this evening.

John Cena is out to kick off the show. 2 weeks ago, the new General Manager made a match for Summerslam, Cena vs. Batista. He says he has never had an issue with Batista, but now he has a match with him, and last week they became tag team champions. He says Adamle is all about hype. Adamle asked him earlier what they could do to hype this match more. Cena had to explain to him that he does not know what he’s done. He’s put John Cena and Dave Batista in a match for the first time ever. You don’t need a photo op or pose down, you just need John Cena and Batista in this very ring right now.

Batista is out now. Batista says here he is. Cena says last week they went in as allies not enemies and the good news is, they won the titles. The bad news is, tonight, they have a rematch and if they don’t co-exist, they’ll both suffer defeat. That’s not going to be the case at Summerslam, because they’ll be enemies. This is a match that has been six years in the making. Cena says he’s been watching Dave. He saw him get hand-picked by Flair and Triple H, and he was put in the position where he was taught everything that the business can throw at you. Cena never had that but every week he turned critics into believers and now every Monday, he stands before a nation that goes to battle with him. Their resumes are both impressive, but between Cena and Batista, who’s better? On Sunday, we answer that question, and it’s going to be [Cena].

Batista says he’s been watching Cena too, and they’re two different sides to the same coin. They’ve both won Rumble matches, Mania main events, heavyweight championship and tag championships. Through all that, Cena never changed and he respects that. But he wouldn’t be caught dead doing some of the things he does and some people over the age of 15 would want to see him beat Cena senseless, and he will do just that. Sunday, Batista will answer the question, and the answer is him.

They stare down now. Cena offers his hand… and Batista takes it.

Kelly Kelly vs. Beth Phoenix with Santino Marella

Beth backs her into the corner so Kelly slaps and mounts her, but Beth tosses her off. Kelly kicks Beth in the head and hits a head scissors takeover and rolls her up for 2. Forearms by Kelly, but she runs into a slam. Beth bends Kelly Kelly around the bottom rope and chokes her, then gets a cover for 2. Kelly Kelly counters a press slam into a sunset flip for 2, but Beth comes back with rights only to run into a boot. Chickenwing facebuster by Beth though, and that’s that.

Winner: Beth Phoenix

Santino says that was awesome, but let’s send a message. Mickie and Kofi run in for the save though, and the heels bail. Santino has an idea. He will challenge *you* to a match right now. Of course, Kofi accepts but Santino was talking to Mickie James. If he is going to wrestle a woman at Summerslam, he needs practice to know where he can and cannot put his hands. Kingston says no, but Mickie accepts. Santino says he will put her back in the kitchen where she belongs.

Santino Marella vs. Mickie James

Mickie rolls out of the way of Santino and he applauds. They lock up and Mickie grabs a side headlock, but Santino rolls through to shove her away. Lock up again and a side headlock takeover by Mickie, but she fights out of it. He gets a leg sweep, but Mickie comes back with one of her own. Mickie rides Santino and spanks him. Arm drag by Mickie, but she gets caught with a slam. Santino misses a double knee drop, and he calls for a timeout. She kicks him in the back of the knee though, then puts the boots to him. Santino goes after Kofi, allowing Beth to come in and tosses Mickie into the ring post behind the referee’s back. Santino rolls her up and grabs the tights for the win.

Winner: Santino Marella

Santino celebrates like he just won a gold medal.

Mike Adamle gets a visit from Kane. Mike says they need to talk. Kane says they have one match too many for ‘Slam, so in an Adamle Original, it’ll be Kane vs. Chris Jericho tonight. Kane says that’s fine. Adamle says after the match, Kane can hand over the bag. Adamle says young boys and girls will be going back to school soon and we don’t want them imitating Kane by carrying a little bag around. Kane says he is making a huge mistake.

We get an ad for WWE 24/7 Classics on Demand.

In the back, Cody Rhodes says they respect history and they learn from it. He says they are a team, while Cena and Batista are not. He says they can’t stand each other and are filled with jealousy and egotism. They will take back their tag team titles. Ted says they are in their early 20s and their careers are further along than any Hall of Famers have been at that age. He says this time next year, it could very well be Rhodes vs. DiBiase in the main event of Summerslam. Tonight, they earn respect.

Cryme Tyme vs. The Highlanders

They’re still employed? No way! Shad and Rory slug it out, and Shad hits a shoulder tackle. JTG in and hits a slingshot shoulder tackle for 2. Robbie provides a distraction and Rory dumps JTG to the floor, then drives him into the ring apron. Back in and Rory gets a 2 count. JTG fights out of a hammerlock/headlock combo and gets the hot tag. Clothesline by Shad to Robbie, and again. Shad hits a delayed vertical suplex and boots Rory off the apron. Shad hits a move King dubs The Nemesis and that’s all.

Winner: Cryme Tyme

Cryme Tyme celebrate, while Rory and Robbie ponder whether they’ll have a job this time next week. The good news, I hear Robbie has friends in TNA.

JBL’s Challenge

There’s a table set up in the ring, covered with a cloth, and there’s a bottle-shaped object in the middle. Punk and JBL both grabs mics. JBL says he is happy that in 6 days, Punk’s title run… Punk tells him to shut up. He’s been listening to the same old tired argument since he won the title. The World Championship is around his waist because he has earned it. They are one week away from Summerslam. As a little Punker he used to watch ‘Slam and picture himself in the ring, so it will be the crowning achievement of his career to walk out of Summerslam as champion. And when he does, he will prove that he’s the man. JBL points out his long title reign. He says this is a business that he built. JBL asks what his merits are. JBL mentions an independent company from Chicago. In 6 days, midnight strikes. JBL says he has talent, but he also has 6 days left as champion, because JBL can beat him at anything he chooses to do, just like last week. JBL removes the cloth to reveal a bottle of Jack Daniels and a shot glass. It’s a drinking contest! No way! JBL pours him a drink, and says if Punk drinks that one drink, he’ll concede that Punk wins this contest. JBL wants to see if Punk will do anything to win. If he doesn’t drink it, JBL will and he will become champion as easily as he wins this contest. Punk says if he drinks this, he’s just another JBL? Punk says he’s not like JBL, he’s CM Punk. Willing to check his body at the door, but he’s not ready to compromise his beliefs because they’ve made him successful, he’s the champion. Punk says thanks but no thanks. JBL thought he’d say that, so instead he will toast to the end of the footnote that is Punk’s title run. Punk says he’s had a change of heart. He takes the shot and sniffs it. Here’s to JBL. Sometimes it’s what you don’t do that makes you who you are. Punk tosses the drink in his face and hits a running knee in the corner.

We get footage of Shawn Michaels’ interview last week.

Kane vs. Chris Jericho with Lance Cade

Jericho goes on the attack with knees and strikes in the corner, but Kane shoves him away and gets a knock down, followed up with a low dropkick to the head. To the corner and rights and lefts by Kane to the gut, and now he hits a big beale but misses an elbow drop. Dropkick by Jericho, rights but he gets tossed out to the floor. Kane pummels Jericho on the floor and tosses him in, but Cade provides a distraction that allows Jericho to hit the springboard dropkick. Rights by Jericho now and a kick to the head. Jericho applies a half-nelson submission, but Kane quickly fights out and hits a side slam. Corner clothesline by Kane, but he runs into an elbow. Jericho comes off the middle rope but eats a right hand. Jericho avoids a charge and turns a roll up into a Walls attempt, but Kane battles back and hits a sidewalk slam. Kane up top now, but Jericho goes up with him and tries for a superplex, but gets shoved off… FLYING CLOTHESLINE! Mike Adamle and security is out now, and they surround the ring. Jericho avoids a chokeslam but runs into big boot. Kane grabs his sack… and Jericho catches him with the Codebreaker! That gets the win!

Winner: Chris Jericho

Adamle gets in the ring and says he knows that this is difficult but we need to resolve this. He is here to help. He knows what’s inside that bag, and he knows who Kane refers to when he asks if he is alive or dead. He is Kane, the monster inside of Kane. He has tried to be a normal person, but he just can’t do it. Deep down inside, Kane is struggling. Adamle says when Kane made the declaration that he is dead, he proved that he can lead a normal life. Adamle says he can lead that normal life by giving him the bag. Kane holds it close to his chest and thinks about it… Adamle says the people deserve to know what’s inside. It’s time to stop fooling around, and we need to get to the bottom of this right now. Adamle tells Kane to take down that wall and hand over that bag. Kane walks towards Adamle, and says there is a mask inside the bag, and the man who wore it has been scarred and tortured and damaged beyond all human recognition. The problem is, it’s not his mask. Kane goes into the bag… and it’s Rey Mysterio‘s mask! Kane finds the situation hilarious, and leaves.

Jamie Noble vs. William Regal

Lock up, to the corner, and knee strikes by Regal. They go to the floor and Rega hits a European uppercut and tosses Noble back in for 1. Noble comes back and hits a cannonball senton in the corner for 1. Noble up top… cross body gets 2. He runs into a T-bone suplex though. A running knee gets the win for Regal.

Winner: William Regal

We get the SmackDown Rebound.

Summerslam looks like this:
World Championship: CM Punk vs. JBL
Shawn Michaels’ Announcement
Hell in a Cell: Undertaker vs. Edge
ECW Championship: Mark Henry vs. Matt Hardy
WWE Championship: Triple H vs. Great Khali
John Cena vs. Batista

According to the text vote, 73% of fans think John Cena is the bigger star between he and Batista.

World Tag Team Championships: Batista and John Cena vs. Simply Priceless

Cena and Batista debate over who will start. Cena tags himself in and gets nailed from behind by both challengers. Cody fires off with elbows to the back of the head. Cody catches Cena for a 2 count but Cena comes back with a couple of shoulder blocks and the Protobomb. DiBiase gets knocked off the apron and Cena wants the Five Knuckle Shuffle, but makes sure to tell Batista that he can’t see him. Cena gives Batista a salute as we go to break. Back from the break, and DiBiase has Cena in a chinlock. Cena powers out and avoids a charge in the corner and Dave gets the tag! Big clothesline for Ted, followed up by shoulder thrusts in the corner. He runs into a boot thought but… SPINEBUSTER! Thumbs down to Cena! Bomb attempt, but Cena comes in and tosses DiBiase aside. Cody in and chop blocks Batista, and comes in and drops some elbows on the leg of Batista. Batista fights back but gets caught with a dropkick to the knee. Cody gets a roll up for 2. Cody gets caught and Batista hits a powerslam! Batista slaps Cena! Tag! DiBiase from behind knocks Cena into Batista and gets a roll up for 3 and the titles!

Winners: Cody Rhodes and Ted DiBiase

Cena wants Batista to get back in the ring. Face to face and they talk trash, but first they must deal with the new champions. Both champs get whipped into the steel steps. Batista calls Cena back now, but Cena walks out… but he has second thoughts. Cena back in the ring now and here comes the security. Boo! But they break through the security and they brawl! Security keeps trying and failing to pull them apart as we go off the air.