411’s WWE Smackdown Report 12.18.12
Welcome to 411’s LIVE WWE Smackdown Report 12.18.12
Championship Roll Call:
WWE Champion: CM Punk
World Champion: Big Show
US Champion: Antonio Cesaro
IC Champion: Kofi Kingston
Unified Diva’s Champion: Eve
WWE World Tag Team Champions: Kane & Daniel Bryan
-Reminder, I do not rate matches that are under three minutes long…
-We get highlights from Raw, including the debut of Big E. Langston.
-The Miz is in the ring for a Super Live edition of Miz TV. His guests did more damage than Lindsay Lohan in a moving vehicle. His guests are Dolph Ziggler and AJ. Ziggler, AJ and Big E Langston make their way to the ring, with AJ giving Ziggler a kiss on their way out. Miz asks why they did what they did, and AJ gives Miz the REALLY treatment. AJ says Miz should ask Cena why he messed with her heart. She lost her job as GM because she wanted to keep Cena’s good name clean, and she thought it was worth it, because of them kissing like they did. AJ gets emotional and says eh won a Slammy for that, and thought it brought them closer together. She thought they would go to the next level and make something beautiful, but Cena played with her heart and emotions. She wanted to shout their love from the rooftop. She even made him gifts, and we see a video of what Vickie had found. She says Cena didn’t appreciate how long it took her to make those bows, because he doesn’t care about anyone but himself. She cared about him, and she wanted to support him, but he refused. Supposedly Cena was worried about her safety, but she knows better, he treated her like a dirty little secret. Cena was supposed to be different, but she only gets humiliated and used. Cena was supposed to be better than that. Cena broke her heart, and so she helped Ziggler break Cena. Miz calls them America’s sweethearts, and asks if Ziggler is on the crazy train. This upsets Langston, and Miz asks who he is. AJ says this is Big E. Langston, a friend of AJ’s and he doesn’t like the word crazy used in regard to AJ. Ziggler says Miz tries to be funny as usual, but is clueless. Ziggler says AJ is not crazy, and uses the almighty “earmuffs baby” line. Ziggler says AJ proved herself when she brought Langston out to crush Cena. He also learned it when she gave him the hottest kiss in Raw history. So Cena can win the Slammy for Superstar of the year, because he doesn’t need Slammys. He kept the MITB contract, it is like his shirt, he stole the show, and his girlfriend. Miz says it is great and all, and hopes Ziggler can satisfy all of AJ’s personalities. Miz says AJ has been with a gimp, goat face, a monster, and now the 6th member of One Direction. Langston attacks Miz and drops him. Big E slam connects like the one on Cena, and Miz is down and out. AJ, Ziggler and Langston stand tall as AJ says “Show…Off.” And then skips around the ring.
-Booker and Teddy meet, and Teddy has a kid that Booker should see and maybe give a chance too. Brad Maddox shows up, and Booker gets pissed because Maddox screwed Ryback. Booker says he is creepy, but Teddy puts over Maddox’s Youtube show. Teddy says the kid has talent and brings controversy. Teddy asks for a tryout match, and says a man deserves a second chance. Booker agrees to give him a match, and he will find out who his opponent is later. Maddox thanks Teddy.
-Damien Sandow makes his way out to the ring.
-No Rey Mysterio with Cara, who made a quick look back to acknowledge the fact. No, wait, Rey gets his own entrance music; but doesn’t come out, Cara looks concerned.
Damien Sandow w/Cody Rhodes vs. Sin Cara
Lock up, Cara works the arm to begin, and Sandow escapes. Off the ropes, kicks by Cara connect. Off the ropes and Sandow avoids the back elbow, and heads to the floor. Sandow back in, chops and rights by Cara. Run up the ropes lucha arm drag by Cara, followed by the springboard elbow. Kick by Cara connects, but Cody pulls Cara to the floor. Well that wasn’t very fair. Cara back in, clubbing shots by Sandow follow. Suplex by Sandow, and a cover gets 2. Headlock by Sandow, Cara escapes, but a Russian leg sweep by Sandow connects. Elbow with the fancy name misses as Cara rolls away. Sunset flip by Cara for 2. Sandow fights back, elbow drop and rights follow. Double axe handle by Sandow, and another cover for 2. Sandow works the headlock, Cara works to his feet, elbows out, and a jawbreaker connects. Sandow misses the corner charge, lands leg kicks, off the ropes and a springboard back elbow by Cara connects. The head scissors follows. More leg kicks by Cara, gets a springboard cross body and a cover for 2. Sandow rolls to the floor, and Cody over to check on him. Suicide dive by Cara takes out both men. Cara back in the ring, celebrates a bit, and we see the Shield make their way into the arena. They have Rey Mysterio’s mask and toss it into Cara. Sandow back in, necktie neck breaker and that is all.
OFFICIAL RESULT: Damien Sandow @ 6:20 via pin
-Sandow and Rhodes bail, and the Shield hit the ring and beat the shit out of Sin Cara. Rollins up top, Ambrose and Reigns hold Cara down and Rollins hits a top rope knee drop to the leg of Cara. Enjoy your time off buddy.
-Flo Rida and Miss Piggy Tribute to the Troops commercial.
-We get highlights from last night, where Santino made fun of Tensai.
Santino Marella vs. Tensai
Crowd chants for Albert as Tensai chases Santino around. Headlock by Santino, off the ropes and a shoulder block by Tensai. Lays the boots to Santino, off the ropes and Santino speed walks. Fails at a body slam, and Tensai beats him down. Rights by Tensai, to the corner and chops by Tensai follow. Tensai looks for a slam; Santino fights out, and tries a German suplex, fails. Body slam try and Tensai falls on Santino and covers for 2. Elbow drops by Tensai, head butt follows and a cover for 2. Neck crank by Tensai, elbows by Santino, off the ropes and bounces off of Tensai with the cross body try. Tensai talks trash to Santino, lands an uppercut and now Santino fires up. Rights, and gets the body slam. Saluting head butt follows. Cobra time, countered and a sleeper by Tensai. The cobra misses, Santino escapes, cobra connects but Tensai just drops Santino. Santino avoids the back splash and covers for the win.
OFFICIAL RESULT: Santino @ 4:20 via pin
-Cole says that Cara has “serious knee damage.”
-Highlights of Flair on Raw last night.
-Kane, Bryan and Kofi meet backstage. Kane warns Kofi about the Shield, and says we all have seen what they have done. Kofi says he agree, and says tonight, he wants his hands on Barrett for payback. Bryan is still upset about losing the Slammy last night. Kofi having his Slammy there doesn’t help, and Kane asks him to let it go. Kane says they got to hang with Flair last night. Bryan says Flair does not have the best catchphrase and goes into a NO chorus.
-Cole says Mysterio was indeed attacked by the Shiled before the show, and suffered a neck injury.
Kane, Daniel Bryan and Kofi Kingston vs. Wade Barrett, Titus O’Neil and Darren Young
O’Neil and Kofi to begin. Barrett distracts Kofi, allowing O’Neil to attack. Kofi battle back and dives to the floor to attack Barrett. O’Neil follows, beats Kofi down and tosses him in the ring. Young in, Kofi fights back and tags in Bryan. He lays in the NO kicks to Young, looks to work a surfboard and does. Young yells for O’Neil, tag to Kane and he delivers a basement dropkick to Young and covers for 2. Kane lays the boots to Young, to the corner and tags back in Bryan. Corner dropkick by Bryan gets 2. More kicks by Bryan, Young battles back, but Bryan lights him up with rapid fire kicks. Stun gun off the ropes by Young, and tags in Barrett. He beats Bryan down, to the corner and more boots follow. Barrett covers for 2. Headlock by Barrett, Bryan escapes, counters a suplex and tags in Kofi. Kofi is the house of fire on Barrett, dropkick and clothesline follow. Boom drop follows, and Kofi sets, distracted by Young and Barrett clotheslines Kofi to the floor. O’Neil slams Kofi into the barricade, rolls Kofi back in and covers for 2. Abdominal stretch by O’Neil, Kofi escapes, and we see a long shot of the crowd for some reason. Young tags in, lays the boots to Kofi and then gets the belly to back suplex for 2. Chinlock by Young, Kofi battles back again, to the corner and Kofi hits hard and drops to the mat. Barrett wants the tag, Cole says that Rey suffered a SEVERE neck injury. Young still in here, stops a tag try by Kofi and delivers knees to the back. Tag to Barrett, and Cole says Cara and Mysterio have been taken to the hospital. Barrett beats down Kofi a bit, and tags Young back in. Sets Kofi up top, rights follow. Kofi fights back, tornado DDT by Kofi connects and BOTH men are down. Tag to Kane, he beats down O’Neil. Corner clothesline connects. Another, and then the side slam and a cover for 2. Kane up top, takes out Young, and misses the clothesline. Sky high by O’Neil, and a cover gets 2 as Bryan makes the save. Barrett tosses Bryan, Kofi in and eats a kick and gets tosses to the post. Clothesline by Kane, O’Neil back in and levels Kane. Young in, chokeslam by Kane and that is all.
OFFICIAL RESULT: Kane, Daniel Bryan and Kofi Kingston @ 10:50 via pin
-Sheamus and Cena meet backstage and talk about their tag match. Cena says Langston may be the strongest person in WWE. Sheamus says they will be surrounded by monsters, and adds that it is his kind of fight. Sheamus asks what is up with AJ, and Cena whispers to Sheamus, who seems genuinely entertained, and then freaked out. Cena tells him more, and Sheamus then looks disgusted, and then shocked. Cena then says he was kidding about it all.
-CM Punk makes his way out with Paul Heyman. Punk says he is at 394 days, the longest un in the modern era. In 20-years, everyone will look back fondly on him as the greatest star of all time. But these mutants couldn’t but aside their disrespect and ignorance and vote him superstar of the year. Instead they turned the prestigious Slammy into a farce by voting for Cena. Apparently winning and losing do not matter, and people like these fans enroll their kids in a no score keeping t-ball league so they never feel like a loser. They all proved that women and men shouldn’t be allowed to vote apparently. He expects the sort of thing from losers, there are winners like himself and Heyman, and losers like all of the fans. He expects the behavior, but expected more from Cena. Watch it back, watch Cena, you can read his face, he knows he didn’t deserve the award and knows Punk is better than him, because Punk is the best in the world. Cena is a hypocrite, he showed his true colors, and sucked up to Flair and gave him the Slammy. Go ahead Pittsburgh, keep woooooing, support the relics from the past who steal from the young lions and true best. They only come back to collect checks to pay alimony and child support. Punk says he is a winner and Flair is a loser. Flair has lost more title matches then won, while CM Punk doesn’t lose. Not to Cena, the knuckle dragging Ryback who injured him. Punk says he is a real man, the gold standard, and he sets the bar so high no one can reach it. Anyone else wouldn’t be here, they would be home popping painkillers. Instead, he is in this hellhole, entertaining the fans. He calls the Penguins ladies for being on strike, and says that he doesn’t go on strike or have an off-season. They all tune in to see him, they paid to see him. He’ll be back, and Heyman will still beholding the title, because no one will beat him.
Ryback makes his way out to the ring. Ryback grabs a mic, and Heyman tells him that Punk is injured and not cleared to compete. Ryback says he will be, and on the first Raw of 2013, Ryback says he will win the title. FEED ME MORE.
-Antonio Cesaro makes his way to the ring.
Non-Title Match: Antonio Cesaro © vs. Ryback
Lock up to begin, side headlock by Cesaro. Off the ropes and Ryback sends him to the floor with a shoulder block. Cesaro back in, shoulder block, sunset flip try, Ryback stops that and slams Cesaro to the mat repeatedly. Cesaro holds onto the ropes, kicks Ryback in the knee as he then connects with an uppercut and head butts. Ryback battles back, sets for the clothesline, but Cesaro rolls to the floor. He gets his title belt, but Ryback presses him over his head. Cesaro slams Ryback into the steps, and rolls back into the ring. The ref counts, and Ryback beats the count. Cesaro grounds Ryback, working a version of the million-dollar dream. Ryback escapes, but then misses a corner charge. Second rope uppercut by Cesaro, and a cover for 2. Double stomp by Cesaro, and another cover for 2. Cravat by Cesaro applied, Ryback works to his feet, escapes and a boot by Cesaro, but that pisses off Ryback. To the corner, but Ryback out with the clothesline. Huge backdrop by Ryback, and sets again for the clothesline. Meat hook connects for Ryback. FINISH HIM! Shell shock connects and that is all.
OFFICIAL RESULT: Ryback @ 5:10 via pin
-Sneak peak of tomorrow’s Tribute to the Troops show.
-AJ meets with Kaitlyn backstage and wishes her luck. AJ thinks Kaitlyn gave her a look, and says that AJ keeps doing this over and over, and it is hard to be her friend. AJ cries, and Kaitlyn says she has a title match and that AJ needs help. AJ says she is choosing a title match over her friend. Kaitlyn calls her a lunatic and AJ attacks and tosses her into a 7-Up machine. They brawl and referees separate them.
Divas Title Match: Eve © vs. Kaitlyn
Eve attacks at the bell and beats Kaitlyn down. Eve hair mares her across the ring, and then kicks her in the face. Cover for 2 by Eve. Eve steps on her face, off the ropes and the running senton gets 2. Eve chokes out Kaitlyn in the ropes, and then sends her to the floor. Eve follows and tosses Kaitlyn into the apron. Back in the ring and Eve covers for 2. Half nelson by Eve, Kaitlyn fights out, but Eve gets a flatliner and covers for 2. Back to the half nelson goes Eve, Kaitlyn again works to her feet, gets a roll up for 2. Another roll up for 2. To the corner, boot by Kaitlyn. Off the ropes and a sunset flip gets 2. Slam by Kaitlyn, off the ropes and a shoulder block connects for 2. Kaitlyn with the reverse DDT ad a cover gets 2. Kaitlyn grabs Eve on her shoulders, Eve grabs the ropes and Eve then gets knocked to the floor. Kaitlyn off the apron with the Thesz pres. She slams Eve to the table, back in the ring and Kaitlyn up top now. Eve grabs the ref’s leg, Kaitlyn back to the mat and Eve tackles the ref for a DQ.
OFFICIAL RESULT: Kaitlyn @ 5:40 via DQ
-AJ bitches to Ziggler, and Big Show arrives and says he will be in a body cast if he tries to cash in again. Show says they do not trust each other, but if he thinks that Ziggler will try and set him up tonight, he will knock him into the future, by the time he wakes up, his contract will have expired.
-Highlights of Sheamus attacking Show on Raw, and Ziggler trying to cash in.
-Brad Maddox makes his way to the ring, repeating his name numerous times. He says after tonight, no one will forget his name, because he will win and earn a WWE contract.
Brad Maddox vs. Brodus Clay
Maddox wants the ref to check Clay, and he attacks. Clay slams him to the mat, head butts to the back follows for Clay. Suplex connects, and then the elbow drop by Clay. Booker and teddy watch from backstage. Maddox to the apron, cheap shot on Clay and then a dropkick follows, and a cover gets 2. Chinlock by Maddox, elbows follow. Clay is pissed, and attacks with a clothesline. To the corner, splash follows. Suplex by Clay connects, and then the running head butt. Call my mamma, splash of the ropes hits and that’s all.
OFFICIAL RESULT: Brodus Clay @ 2:30 via pin
-The Shield attacks Clay after the match. Triple team powerbomb on Clay and the Shield stands tall.
-Santa Claus is hosting the Christmas Eve episode of Raw. I was hoping for Xanta Claus…
Sheamus and John Cena vs. Dolph Ziggler w/AJ and Big E. Langston and The Big Show
Cena and Ziggler to begin. Ziggler shows off and eats a right from Cena. Show tags in, Cena attacks and Show head butts him to the mat. Chops by Show miss, dropkick by Cena. SPEAR by Show takes Cena down, and Show follows with body shots. Cheap shot by Ziggler, Show walks on Cena’s stomach, and then delivers a head butt. Show mocks Sheamus a bit, tags Ziggler and he delivers repeated elbow drops to Cena and covers for 2. Ziggler works a chinlock, Cena fights to his feet and then shoots Ziggler off the ropes, and a backdrop and both men are down. Show tags in, elbow drop to the back connects and Show then talks shit to Sheamus. Corner splash by Show, tag back to Ziggler and then misses the charge. Tag to Sheamus, beats down Ziggler, rights, knee lift, and then the clubbing shots in the ropes follows. White noise try, Sheamus drops him and attacks Show. Cloverleaf try by Sheamus, Ziggler kicks him to the floor. Clothesline by Show levels Sheamus, and he then tosses Sheamus back into the ring. Show tags in, body shots follow. Big chops by Show, body shots in the corner follow and a cheap shot by Ziggler follows. Sheamus tries to fight back, another body shot by Show and he remains in control. Knee to the head by Show, walks on Sheamus’ gut, and then works the arm of Sheamus. Sheamus gets to his feet, off the ropes and a shoulder block by Show. Ziggler tags in and covers for 2. Boots by Ziggler in the corner, Sheamus with rights, they trade shots in the corner, but a boot by Ziggler drops Sheamus. A DDT connects and a cover for 2 by Ziggler. Show tags in, final cut connects and he covers for 2. Sheamus crawls for a tag, Show stops that, chokeslam try, countered and Sheamus gets a DDT. BOTH men are down. Tags to Ziggler and Cena. Cena with the shoulder block, proto bomb, and five-knuckle shuffle all connect. AA try, Show in to stop that and Sheamus is in as well and sends himself and Show to the floor. They brawl on the floor, zigzag by Ziggler and he covers for 2. Ziggler complains to the ref, AA connects. Langston in and we have a DQ.
OFFICIAL RESULT: Cena and Sheamus @ 10:30 via DQ
-Langston hits the Big E slam on Cena like last night. Langston stands over Cena as AJ enters the ring to skip around his carcass. AJ makes out with Ziggler.
MY FIRST LINE OF DEFENSE DURING THE ZOMBIE APOCALYPSE: MACHINE GUN DOGS
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