411’s WWE Smackdown Report 2.15.13
AYE-OOOO! What’s up, bitches? [/Mac] It’s Michael Benjamin here with another Smackdown report! The show doesn’t look very exciting tonight but let’s see how it turns out. SHOW… ON!
Championship Roll Call:
WWE Champion: The Rock
World Champion: Alberto Del Rio
US Champion: Antonio Cesaro
IC Champion: Wade Barrett
Unified Diva’s Champion: Kaitlyn
WWE World Tag Team Champions: Kane & Daniel Bryan
WWE Smackdown Report 2.15.13
– “Get ready for something that you’ve never known. You won’t see it coming but I promise you’ll know… It’s the Big Show.” Oh yeah. We get a replay of ADR pouring orange paint all over Big Show last week. Show makes his way down to the ring and he doesn’t look very happy. He gets riled up rather quickly, exclaiming that Alberto Del Rio has never pinned him. Well, that’s actually a pretty valid point.
– BREAK THE WALLS DOWN! Y2J interrupts Show’s tirade. Jericho says that he’s known Big Show for 16 years and that he can read him like a book. He knows how Show’s feeling. Show says that if Jericho knew how he was feeling, he’d get the hell out of the ring. Chris Jericho says that he’s back in the WWE, he’s pumped to be here, he’s working better than ever and every Jericholic knows it to be true. I can’t argue that. Jericho cuts the same mutual respect promo that he cut on ADR this Wednesday. That doesn’t do much to cool Big Show’s jets. He tells Jericho to get out of the ring before he knocks him out.
– Here comes Booker T! But… there’s only two wrestlers in the ring? Book says that he likes where this is going and we can’t be certain that we’re going to get Big Show vs Chris Jericho at Mania. Thus, he’s booking them in SINGLES action against each other tonight!
– Matt Striker catches up with Randy Orton backstage. He asks Orton how he feels about having to wrestle Mark Henry 48 hours before the Elimination Chamber match. Before he can speak, Mark walks on to the scene. They stare each other down for a moment before Mark Henry’s music hits. He takes one last look at Orton before exiting.
Orton sure looks bigger this Wrestlemania season, doesn’t he? They lock up to start and Orton quickly gets powered into the corner. A second lock up doesn’t end up too much better for Orton. They head to the outside quickly and Orton hits a clothesline before rolling in the ring. Henry gets in at 6. A big headbutt from Henry puts him back in control. He corners Orton again and delivers a clubbering. Henry goes for a splash but Orton moves! Henry gets to his feet but he gets hit with a dropkick. Orton corners him and goes for ten punches but Mark throws him over the top turnbuckle to the outside. This seems like a better time than ever to head to…
We’re back and Mark’s dripping all over the place. He has a NERVE HOLD~! on Orton. He lifts Orton over his shoulder and gives him a huge powerslam for TWO. Back to the nerve hold, baby. He whips Orton into the corner but Orton gets his foot up. He delivers a clothesline to Henry but Henry isn’t going anywhere! Two more and the big man goes down. He gets back up, ducks another, and hits his own clothesline on Orton. Orton recovers quickly. DDT off the middle rope from Orton! HE’S HEARING VOICES IN HIS HEAD GUYS! Henry gives him a loose looking ax handle and Orton goes to the outside. Henry follows him out there. Orton grabs a chair and hits Henry in the stomach with it for the DQ. If I told you to imagine Mark Henry vs Randy Orton in a TV match with a DQ finish, this is about what you’d imagine… I imagine.
OFFICIAL RESULT: Mark Henry @ 5:00 aired via DQ
– Post match, Orton beats Henry up with the chair a bit before Henry grabs it from Orton’s grip and gives him the World’s Strongest Slam. If I was a casual fan flipping channels and caught this, I would have been certain that Henry was the face and Orton was the heel here. Lets see where they are in six months.
– Matt Striker catches up with Henry backstage. Henry rips the microphone out of his hand and says that they’re going to need the police, the navy, and the marines to stop him at Elimination Chamber this Sunday. They should send out 50 jobbers dressed like that one night and let them all get destroyed by Henry.
RAW REBOUND: We get a Raw Rebound covering the Shield/Super Team angle on Raw.
They trotted Layla out before the commercial break. I’m not sure if that’s the best strategy to make sure people don’t change the channel. Tamina comes in after the break so nobody gets a jobber entrance. Good! The bell rings and we’re off. They circle each other and we get a roll up sequence in the early going. Layla hits a nice springboard crossbody. Tamina heads to the outside. Layla’s on the apron and charges at Tamina. She attempts a dropkick but Tamina catches her feet and pulls her down on to the apron in a nasty fall. That was pretty cool. Back in the ring now and Tamina goes for the cover but only gets two. She locks in a headlock. Kaitlyn is watching on the monitor backstage. Tamina whips Layla into the corner and charges for a clothesline. Layla ducks and goes for a roll up. TWOOOO. Samoan Drop. Splash off the top. Donezo. This was a decent squash Tamina looks strong heading into her title match. I’ll throw in an extra 1/4* for that sick apron spot.
OFFICIAL RESULT: Tamina @ 4:10 via pinfall
– We get a recap of the Rock/Punk altercation on Raw.
– Here comes The Rock! The Rock wants to make something perfectly clear to CM Punk. He says that Punk traded six days of holding the belt for an ass kicking of his life. *POP* This Sunday, The Rock is going to make CM Punk suffer. He calls CM Punk a spoiled little boy. The Rock says that it took him ten long years to get the title back and it’ll only take one night to make sure CM Punk never holds it again. *POP*
– Punk and Heyman show up on the Tron via satellite. Punk reminds the crowd of the travesty at Elimination Chamber. He points out that Rock is fuming and that’s exactly what he wants. CM Punk wants him to lose his temper so bad that he disqualifies himself. This could actually lead to some really good psychology if they play to the stipulation . Rock calls Punk’s words worthless because Punk said he’d win at the Rumble and he didn’t. Does that make John Cena’s word worthless too? JW! The Rock says not to worry about what’s happening this Sunday. He says to worry about Monday when the spoiled little boy wakes up without his title. Do a shot every time The Rock calls CM Punk a spoiled little boy in this promo. Despite that, this was a good “Serious Rock” promo which is definitely what they needed for the go home show.
McIntyre is on the bench today. Heath Slater and Tensai are going to start us off. This should be a full fledged three month feud. DANCE OFF~! Slater kicks Tensai mid-dance! What a heel. In comes Mahal with the clubbering. He hits a nice running knee on Tensai and locks on a headlock. Mahal hits the ropes and Tensai catches him and hits an awful looking Black Hole Slam. In comes Brodus with the t-bone suplex on Mahal. Slater comes off the top for an ax handle but gets caught with a headbutt. Tensai hits a sit out powerbomb on Mahal. Brodus follows up with a funky splash for the three count. I take back what I said about the three month feud. This match wasn’t very good. Give em six months to get some chemistry.
OFFICIAL RESULT: Brodus and Tensai @ 3:40 via pinfall
– Tensai, Brodus, and The Funkadactyls are dancing and HERE COMES THE SHIELD. The Funkadactyls bounce. Tensai and Brodus get a vintage Shield beat down. “Don’t you dare think for one moment that this Sunday it’s going to look any different” says Ambrose. He says that they’re going to learn the hard way that their actions will have consequences and that they will believe in The Shield!
– FAN… DAN… GOOOOOOOOOO
Okay, they’ve already established that Cody is a JTTS right now which sucks. It sucks worse when said star is The Miz. Not saying he’s not a star. But you know. We get a replay of Cesaro’s awesome beatdown on Miz this Monday. They circle to start. Cody targets the injured shoulder right out of the gate. He’s doing a great job of tugging at it and really making it look like he’s trying to rip it from it’s socket. Miz escapes an arm lock and here we go! Things pick up and we get a nice reversal sequence. Cody goes for a disaster kick and Miz dodges it. Figure Four. Cody taps. Son of a bitch. They used their limited ring time well enough, managing to tell a story in a matter of minutes. It’s unfortunate that Cody’s in this position right now though. I can think of a half dozen wrestlers lower on the pecking order that could have eaten that pin while still making Miz look strong.
OFFICIAL RESULT: The Miz @ 3:14 via submission
They circle and Swagger goes for the take down immediately. He corners Ryder and elbows him into kidneys. Ryder ducks a clothesline and hits one of his own. Swagger reverses an Irish whip and sends Ryder into the corner. Ryder jumps on the top rope but Swagger tugs him down by his leg. He sends him into the adjacent corner and knees the shit out of him before sending him back to the first corner with a strong whip. These guys love their corners. Ryder goes for the Broski Boot but Swagger moves out of the way. He slides to the outside and slams Ryder’s leg on the ring post. Back in the ring, Swagger hits a chop block to the leg he’s targeting. Swagger hits a nice gut wrench powerbomb before locking in the ankle lock. Quick tap by Ryder. Swagger looked really good here.
OFFICIAL RESULT: Jack Swagger @ around 3:00 via submission
– After the match Swagger introduces Zeb Coulter to us. He hands Zeb the mic and here comes the rambling. The country is broken and these two know how to fix it. I like their shtick. I wonder how long Coulter’s going to be around.
– Striker is with Alberto Del Rio backstage. Alberto says that Big Show is right. He’s never pinned him but he loves to do the impossible. He asks Ricardo if he’s going to win and go to Wrestlemania with his title. Si!
– Big Show makes his way to the ring as we head to our final…
Big Show goes for the chops right out of the gate but Jericho’s too quick. Big Show quickly controls him though and sends him flying to the outside with a headbutt. He stands Jericho against the announce table and gives him a huge chop! He rolls Jericho back in and Jericho hits a springboard dropkick before he could get in. Jericho comes back out for him and Big Show throws him onto over the announce table. Back inside the ring Big Show is picking Jericho a part. Jericho tries to fight back with chops but gets an XL scoop slam instead. Big Show charges at Jericho but gets a boot to the face. Jericho goes upstairs but Big Show locks him in for a chokeslam. Jericho grabs Show’s arm and drops to the floor with it in an attempt to hyper-extend it. Jericho immediately gets back in and delivers quick kicks.
His offense doesn’t last long as Big Show catches him mid-air and delivers a chokeslam. Jericho rolls to the floor. Big Show isn’t going to let him get counted out though. He rolls him back in and goes for the elbow off the second rope! Jericho moves and hits the lionsault! Jericho goes for a Codebreaker but Big Show catches him! Jericho rolls through for a pin but Big Show lifts him back up! Jericho reverses that into a nice DDT for TWO! He delivers a dropkick to the head and attempts to lock in the walls. He struggles for a minute but gets overpowered. He charges back at Show but gets hit with a KO punch! That’s all folks. This was a pretty good match that surprisingly never had a dull moment.
OFFICIAL RESULT: Big Show @ 7:28 via pinfall
OVERALL: This was definitely a go home show. It was all about Elimination Chamber tonight and they didn’t let us forget about it. Unfortunately, it just wasn’t very exciting. Outside of a good Rock/Punk promo and a solid main event, the show was pretty sub par. I’m still excited for the PPV this Sunday though, so I guess Smackdown did it’s job well enough.