411’s WWE Smackdown Report 2.22.13
Michael Benjamin here! Get all of your Smackdown recap needs by scrolling down at your leisure!
Championship Roll Call:
WWE Champion: The Rock
World Champion: Alberto Del Rio
US Champion: Antonio Cesaro
IC Champion: Wade Barrett
Unified Diva’s Champion: Kaitlyn
WWE World Tag Team Champions: Kane & Daniel Bryan
WWE Smackdown Report 2.22.13
– Lillian Garcia announces Ricardo and Ricardo announces Alberto Del Rio. I think Ricardo needs a personal ring announcer. How awesome would that be? Alberto’s in a casual suit, indicating that we’ll be getting a talky segment to kick things off. Alberto addresses that Jack Swagger is his opponent at Wrestlemania. He defends immigrants and the idea of the American dream. If they decide to keep this angle running after Jack’s scrape with the law, it could be a heat machine. Alberto calls out Jack Swagger but gets Randy Orton instead.
– When are they going to pull the trigger on this heel turn? They’ve been planting unsubtle seeds for months. Randy says that he’s going to do his best to stay calm. Orton says that his chance to wrestle for the World Heavyweight Championship was taken by Jack Swagger. He tells ADR to step aside. If they have to fight over it, so be it. He wants Swagger tonight.
– This brings out Booker T. Whoa guys, how are you trying to book a match without Book? Booker T says that he already had a champion vs champion match booked for tonight. It’ll be Barrett vs Alberto. He grants Orton’s wish and gives him a match with Swagger tonight. He booked two singles matches!? He must have a 16 team tournament planned for next week. These opening segments are SO uninspired. It’s like they’re a caricature of themselves at this point.
– SHEAMUS IS WALKING. He’s good at walking. Watch him walk!
– Fan… Dan… Go…
Both men get entrances. Sandow has a microphone per usual. He says that tonight we’ll bare witness to our false idol Sheamus. His only purpose is to drag us further into the bowels of our own ignorance. Tonight, Sheamus’ reign of terror will come to an end. We’re welcome. Ding, ding, ding. Sheamus dominates to start things off with some physical strikes. The announcers are putting over how angry he is due to his loss to The Shield on Monday. Sandow goes for a hip toss but eats a clothesline. Sheamus follows up with a second clothesline, sending Sandow to the outside. He tosses Sandow into the barricade twice before rolling him into the ring. He hits a flying shoulder tackle over the top rope! A cornered Sandow kicks Sheamus in the knee in an attempt to mount offense. He ends up on the apron for the TEN COUNT CLUBBERING though. Sheamus attempts a suplex into the inside but Sandow pushes him off and drops to the floor for a breather as we head to break.
We’re back with Sandow in control. He dominated the match during the commercial break. Elbow of Disdain! Every time Sheamus tries to mount offense, Sandow cuts him off. Sandow locks in a sleeper. Sheamus fights out of it and charges at Sandow! The charge is dodged and Sheamus lands throat first on the middle rope. Sandow attacks and chokes him on the rope before attempting a pin. TWO. Sleeper hold applied! Sheamus fights out and whips him into the corner. Shoulder thrust! He hits three running ax handles and attempts a powerslam. Sandow escapes and gives him the X-Factor for two. Sandow goes for the neck breaker but Sheamus powers out! Headbutts from Sheamus! He goes for White Noise and Sandow escapes! He hits it on his second try… And boom goes the dynamite. Brogue kick. It’s over. The match was okay. They never lost me but they never had me. If that makes sense. I was expecting a better match. This one felt like it never got out of second gear despite being fundamentally sound.
OFFICIAL RESULT: Sheamus @ 9:00 aired via pinfall
– We get a video package of the Wrestlemania 30 press conference.
– A Shield video package airs. Okay, these guys are the real deal now. Is there any sort of long term direction planned for them? I wonder if they’re going anywhere with this. Right now it seems like they’re building to a Ryback/?/? vs Shield match at Mania. 4th time is a charm, Ryback!
– Earlier, Kaitlyn loved Cody’s mustache backstage. He says that the ladies call it the Lovestache. Face turn Cody!
Here we go! The crowd is SO dead. Aksana sends Kaitlyn to the outside. Kaitlyn rolls in and ends up on the receiving end of a side slam. TWO. Aksana gets frustrated and stomps a mudhole into a downed Kaitlyn. The crowd is actually more behind Aksana than anybody else in the match. Aksana attempts to deliver a running ax handle to a downed Kaitlyn but nobody’s home. Double tag. Layla hits Tamina with a sloppy dropkick. Tamina rolls through an “LOL” but Kaitlyn hits her with a spear for 3. The Shield just used that finish twice. On a scale from one to ten, it was a divas match.
OFFICIAL RESULT: Kaitlyn and Layla @ 4:10 via pinfall
RAW REBOUND: We get a recap from The Rock’s celebration on Monday. A little much for RETAINING a title but whatevz. The best part of this segment? CM Punk throwing the spinner belt at a downed Cena, pointing to the new title, and saying “I want that one”.
– Swagger and Coulter are walking to the ring before Barrett cuts them off. Barrett says that he agrees with everything that they’re saying. Zeb says that Wade has it twisted. He points out that Barrett doesn’t talk the same as him. He’s not from here and he’s stealing jobs from real Americans. Touchy angle. I love it.
Orton gets the jobber entrance. I guess it’s not really a jobber entrance in 2013. They pick and choose pretty randomly now-a-days. Here comes Swagger! His entrance music is epic. I hope they don’t write him off. I’d understand if they did though. Lock up and stalemate to start. Orton goes for a quick roll up for 2. Orton stomps a mudhole into Swagger. Swagger kicks him in the gut and hits the rope for a clothesline. Orton intercepts with an elbow and follows up with a back suplex. TWO. Orton keeps it up with a bevy of strikes. Snapemare into a headlock by Orton. Swagger fights out of hit and hits the back suplex for two. In a page out of Ziggler’s book, he drops four elbows quickly to maintain offense. A few shoulder blocks by Swagger keeps him in control. Orton gets a roll up!? NO! TWO! Orton hits a nice dropkick to the jaw. He circles Swagger and stomps every limb before delivering a bunch of elbow drops for two. Swagger begins working on the leg before Orton goes to “that place”. Swagger runs to the outside and gets hit with a Lou Thesz press followed by a clothesline.
We’re back! Orton goes for his assisted DDT off of the second rope but Swagger reverses. They end up on the outside and Swagger whips him into the ring steps. This turns the tide. Swagger rolls him in for two. The announcers are definitely hammering home that Swagger is being brainwashed by Coulter. That’s perfect for an eventual face turn if they stick with him. Back to the outside and Orton sends Swagger rib first into the barricade. Back in the ring and Swagger chop blocks the knee. Swagger locks Orton in for a suplex but Orton puts on the brakes. He hits his own and the tide’s about to turn. Swagger charges Orton but goes shoulder first into the post! He’s going to that place where he voices in his head! The new Jack Swagger doesn’t give a shit about that place and fights back. Orton hits the inverted back breaker and Swagger rolls to the apron. Note: Stay off the apron when wrestling Randy Orton. Assisted DDT! Orton’s calling for the RKO! Swagger hits an eye rake! Roll up! Win! Not a bad TV match. Swagger could use a submission win over a big name rather than these fluke pinfalls he’s been getting though.
OFFICIAL RESULT: Jack Swagger @ 12:00 via pinfall
WWE REWIND: Vickie announces that Brad Maddox is “Assistant to the Managing Supervisor of Raw”. That’s some outside the box comedy right there.
RAW REBOUND PART 2: They air a video package hyping up Heyman vs Vince for Monday. I’m sure it’ll be a killer segment if the rumors are any indication, but I’m not sure hyping “McMahon vs. Heyman” is going to bring in the ratings.
Miz vs Rhodes 2! Just in case last weeks match didn’t hammer home Cody being a JTTS enough. They show a pretape of Cody saying that he’s sick of the criticism about his mustache. He drops the Lovestache line again. Miz is in control to start. He goes upstairs and Cody hyper-extends the injured shoulder of Miz over the top rope. He stomps the arm and goes for a pin. .25! .50! .75! ONE! Cody hits a nice elevated dropkick for a two count this time. Miz should be involved in more kayfabe injuries. His matches are more entertaining. Miz hits a boot to the face after rolling through a sunset flip for two. Miz escapes a back suplex and hits Cody with a big boot for two. Josh says that Cody’s having a hard time finding his feet after separating from Sandow. AKA – Jobberville until after Mania. Cody taps to the Figure four at around three minutes.
OFFICIAL RESULT: The Miz @ 3:00 via submission
Swagger’s music hits as he and Coulter step on to the ramp. They’ll be watching the match. Alberto and Barrett start with a stalemate exchange. Alberto hits a nice snapemare follows by a kick to the back of Barrett’s head. Del Rio gives Barrett a nice dropkick on the outside and the ref begins the ten count as we head to our last…
They’re brawling on the outside as we come back from break. Barrett gives ADR a hard Irish whip into the steps before rolling him inside the ring for two. Barrett dodges a clothesline and delivers a stiff kick to the gut of ADR before nailing a big pump handle slam for two. ADR gets locked up in the ropes and Barrett delivers his signature knees to the ribs followed by a big boot that knocks Alberto to the outside. Barrett follows him out and rolls him back in. He goes for a pin but only gets two. He drops three elbows and quickly attempts another cover. Again, he only gets two. He locks in a headlock and Alberto makes it to his feet within seconds. Barrett whips him into the corner but ADR blocks it. He jumps to the top rope and hits a nice sit out dropkick. Both men down! They make it to their feet by 4.5 and Alberto hits a couple of clotheslines before hitting a nice tilt-a-whirl back breaker. He kicks Barrett in the face for two! Alberto charges but gets caught in the Black Hole Slam! TWO! Barrett is suddenly in control. Barrett goes for Wasteland but Alberto escapes. He hits a barrage of kidney punches before delivering a back stabber to Barrett. TWO. Si! Si! Si! Cross Arm Breaker!?!? Swagger makes his way down the ramp and distracts ADR! Roll up by Barrett! TWO! Barrett hits a big boot and sets up for the Bull Hammer! Alberto ducks and locks in the cross arm breaker! It’s over! This was a good match. It’s about what you’ve come to expect from a Smackdown main event if you watch regularly.
OFFICIAL RESULT: Alberto Del Rio @ 10:00 aired via submission
OVERALL: This was an alright Smackdown. Nothing was that bad but there wasn’t anything all that great either. If I didn’t know better, it would seem like WWE was building up to just another PPV based off of tonights show. Here’s to hoping they’ll pick it up in the coming weeks. Adding Cesaro and Henry back into the mix couldn’t hurt things.
I’ll see you guys on Wednesday for the Main Event report! Thank you for reading.