Csonka’s Impact Wrestling Review 3.02.17

Csonka’s TNA Impact Review 3.02.17

OFFICIAL RESULTS
– Last Knockout Standing Knockouts Title Match: Champion Rosemary defeated Jade @ 11:20 [***¾]
– James Storm defeated Jessie Godderz @ 6:30 via pin [**½]
– X-Division Title Match: Champion Trevor Lee defeated Andrew Everett @ 7:20 via pin [***]
– Impact Grand Championship Match: Moose defeated Champion Drew Galloway via split decision [***½]
– TNA Title Match: Champion Lashley defeated Josh Barnett @ 9:01 via pin [**½]

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– TO THE RING!

Last Knockout Standing Knockouts Title Match: Champion Rosemary vs. Jade: We kick off things with a match this week, they brawled right away as Jade charged up the ramp during Rosemary’s entrance; she then hit a suicide dive, but Rosemary battled back and they both teased their finishes. Jade then started to toss around Rosemary with some German suplexes. Jade showed great fire until Rosemary brought out the toys. Rosemary attacked with trashcan shots, and then hit the coast-to-coast dropkick, with the trashcan involved. Jade was the ever-resilient face who simply kept fighting, and hit a powerbomb onto a trashcan. Unfortunately for Jade, it wasn’t enough to keep the demon down. Jade went high risk, but jumped off the ropes into the MIST by Rosemary; the red wedding followed, Jade survived and made it to her feet. Rosemary took her to the floor, hit red wedding again; but jade was not done and posted Rosemary. Jade gets water, rinses out her eyes. She powerbombs Rosemary into the steps, and gets her first real tease of winning. They brawled up the ramp; Rosemary misted Jade to escape a powerbomb on the stage. Rosemary hits a third red wedding. Champion Rosemary defeated Jade @ 11:20 [***¾] Like their other matches, this was a very good match to cap off their three match series. I feel it went just a bit too long, and that the ending was a little flat, holding it back from being really great; but I loved that Rosemary got the definitive win without any help; she is great so far as champion, now they just need to properly feature her.

– To the Hardy compound with the entire clan in attendance. Matt wants to test Nero’s broken brilliance.

– Moose doesn’t care about anything in regards to Cody, because Cody is a bitch. Cody attacks from Behind and they brawl. Security breaks them up until Moose powerbombs one of them to the floor onto other security guys. The brawl continues, Moose takes out more security and attacks Cody again. Guys from the back arrive to help the security. Brandi then arrives, telling Cody to stop. Cody then does the best thing in his post WWE run and tossed Josh Mathews down. Moose then hits a big dive onto Cody and a pile of security. I didn’t care for last week’s angle, but this was a really good follow up.

Jessie Godderz vs. James Storm: We got a fast paced back and forth, with Godderz taking control, hitting dropkicks and a belly to belly; he works the Adonis lock but Storm escapes and they brawl to the floor. Back in the ring, Godderz maintains control and again tries for the Adonis lock. Kingston then distracts Godderz, allowing Storm to attack. He works the knee, grounding Godderz. Kingston then attacks Godderz on the floor, allowing Storm to keep the heat. Kingston repeatedly gets involved, but Godderz fires up and works over Storm, hitting an enziguri. Godderz then connects with the blockbuster for a near fall. Storm fires back with a spinebuster, but Godderz escapes the whirly bird and catapults Storm to the corner. Kingston in the ring, Godderz fights him off and gets the Adonis lock but the ref is distracted; Bram in with a chair shot to Godderz, Storm hits the last call and wins. James Storm defeated Jessie Godderz @ 6:30 via pin [**½] Too much bullshit that constantly disrupted the flow of a match that would have been better without it. DCC is a rather bad stable, which is a shame.

X-Division Title Match: Champion Trevor Lee vs. Andrew Everett: they brawled right away to playoff of their recent issues/split. Everett sends Lee to the floor and follows with a dive. Lee then hits a Sasuke special, and is fired up as he hits a springboard moonsault to the floor and runs off Helms. Back in and Lee hits the moonsault counter slam and follows with ground and pound. Pope says that the new owners will be in the building next week. Lee hits a superman punch and lays the boots to Everett, follows with rights and then whips Everett to the corner. Everett counters a German, hits a running kick and then the springboard missile dropkick. Everett fires up with running forearms, the knee strike follows and then and enziguri. Everett hits a spike RANA, but Helms distracts the ref. Everett chases him off, Everett up top, but eats knees on the shooting star allowing Lee to cradle him up with the tights and retain. Champion Trevor Lee defeated Andrew Everett @ 7:20 via pin [***] This was good, worked at a great pace and felt like an X-Division showcase. More of this please.

– Back to the Hardy compound as brother Nero feeds the animals. He has a premonition, and says the whole platoon must go because they will be outnumbered. They all teleport away.

– The Hardy clan are now teleported to a flea market. Matt says at least it’s not a bingo hall. They search for the tag team champions of this territory.

– The Hardys look to win the National Tag Team Titles of the world. The promoter tries to tell them they can’t have a title shot, and Senor Benjamin tazes the top contenders. We then get video highlights of the Hardy’s most recent title victory, Matt was isolated as the former contenders took Nero back to the flea market and worked him over. Benjamin arrived and that led to he and Nero chasing them off with fireworks. Nero returned to help Matt win the titles. Matt, Nero, Benjamin, Reby. Maxel and Vanguard1 all celebrate before teleporting away.

– Trainers check on Moose as Galloway arrives, and offers Moose a shot at the Grand Championship. Galloway graciously gave him “5 or 10 minutes” to accept.

– We then get highlights of last week’s great wedding segment. Farewell Mike & Maria.

– Laurel Van Ness is backstage, still in her wedding dress, and drinking champagne; she’s devastated over the wedding.

Impact Grand Championship Match: Champion Drew Galloway vs. Moose: They brawled right away, with Galloway taking advantaged of a weakened Moose and playing well off of their past matches and issues. They brawled to the floor, going back and forth. Galloway cuts off Moose and slams Moose to the barricade, and then hits the air raid crash on the steps. Galloway hopes for a countout, but the round ends. (Galloway takes round one 29-28). Moose hits a big bicycle kick to start round two, and runs wild, hitting a powerbomb and then a senton and moonsault for the near fall. Galloway cuts off Moose with big boots, but eats a dropkick and is tossed across the ring and Moose covers for the near fall. Galloway looks to walk to the back, Moose teases a dive and Galloway hits a DVD onto the apron. Moose hits a head butt and an apron bomb; both men are down. Round two ends, (the scores are now even as Moose won round two). Round three begins with the double big boot spot, they must have watched taker vs. Diesel from Mania 12. They battle up top, Galloway pulls Moose to the mat and then runs into a buckle bomb. Game changer by Moose and Galloway gets a foot on the ropes. Low blow by Galloway, hits the claymore and then a tombstone for the near fall. Moose escapes the future shock, they battle back and forth and Galloway hits another claymore, but Moose rebounds with a game changer and time expires. Moose defeated Champion Drew Galloway via split decision [***½] very good outing again from these guys, they have good chemistry and did some great call backs to their previous matches. I assume that the split decision was done because Galloway hadn’t re-signed yet and they were hoping he would.

TNA Title Match: Champion Lashley vs. Josh Barnett: They grappled early, with both men looking to ground their opponent. Barnett worked body kicks, taking Lashley to the ground, and looks to work his submission game. Lashley powered up, slamming Barnett to the mat. They worked through a break and when returned, Lashley had taken control. Barnett quickly came back with knee strikes, but Lashley cut him off and grounded Barnett, fishing for am arm submission. Barnett tried to fire up with a clothesline, missing Lashley, but Lashley recovered and covered it up; Lashley went for a spear, but Barnett countered with a guillotine and rolled into an arm bar. Barnett then locked in the Key lock, Lashley escapes and Barnett looks for a German but Lashley powers out. Barnett then works leg kicks, Lashley then fights him off and hits the spear to retain. Champion Lashley defeated Josh Barnett @ 9:01 via pin [**½] I really appreciated that they worked this in a completely different style to play off of their MMA backgrounds. Unfortunately it lacked a cohesive flow, and they heavily edited it to erase the “controversial” finish, which likely hurt things. Also there was no heat for Barnett, because they rushed into this and didn’t give fans a reason to care. It was a fine experiment, but nothing I need to see again.

– Next week, TNA Impact wrestling starts over, again.

– End scene.

– Thanks for reading.

“Byyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyye Felicia!”

7.8

The final score: review Good

The 411

First of all, let me get the lone negative out of the way here early; Josh Mathews’ commentary was absolutely atrocious as he worked his “heel announcer” gimmick, unfortunately it came off poorly like Michael Cole’s efforts as most of the time it was too obnoxious and took away from the product instead of enhancing a good show. This was an all time worst performance by a wrestling announcer as he made me want to mute the show. This felt like the best Impact in a while and of course it comes one week before the latest course correction, I hope that they can take the momentum from this show and follow up on it next week. What you need to see: Jade vs. Rosemary, Moose vs. Galloway.