Csonka’s Lucha Underground Review 1.11.17
Csonka’s Lucha Underground Review 1.11.17 (Gods Among Men)
– Texano defeated Joey Ryan @ 7:10 via pin [**½]
– Cage defeated Veneno @ 1:20 via pin [NR]
– DEATH MATCH: The Monster Matanza Cueto defeated Dragon Azteca Jr @ 7:00 via Death/Ref Stoppage [***]
– We get the usual well done video package.
– Dario meets with Councilman Delgado, and they discuss Cage and the gauntlet. Dragon Azteca Jr arrives; he is here to destroy old enemies. He wants a match, because Matanza tried to break he and Rey. He wants a death match, Delgado is impressed and Dario makes the match.
– Striker hypes the main event, noting that the last death match seemingly ended the career of King Cuerno. Striker brings up Mil Muertes, and Dragon Azteca Jr, Vampiro vows to get revenge.
Texano vs. Joey Ryan: Ryan puts his lollipop down his pants, so Striker makes blow pop jokes. Ryan stalled a bit, Texano cuts him off and takes him down hitting an elbow drop. Slingshot senton by Texano follows and the cover gets 2. Ryan runs away, stuns Texano off the ropes and then slammed to the barricade. Ryan then sucked on the lollipop from his pants. Ryan then grounded Texano, as famous b arrived in an over the top country style outfit as he tries to sign Texano. Texano battled back, hit the leg lariat off the ropes and ten kicked Ryan in the face and covered for 2. Texano hit the back breaker and then sent Ryan to the floor. Texano followed with the slingshot plancha as Famous B praised Texano. Back in, Texano up top and gets crotched. Ballsplex by Ryan and a knee strike gets 2. Brenda gives Texano a horseshoe as Famous B distracts Ryan, horseshoe shot by Texano and he wins. Post match, Texano was more interested in Brenda, shoving Famous B down. Texano defeated Joey Ryan @ 7:10 via pin [**½] This was a perfectly solid opener, playing off of Famous B’s previous attempt to recruit Texano. Texano lost the best of five series with Cage, and I snow doubting himself, and accepted the help to get on the winning side of things this week
Johnny Mundo Talking Time: Mundo gives a shout out to Taya, who is at home working on his documentary. He is the mayor of Slamtown, the Lucha Underground Champion and the guy that put this place on the map. He beat everyone, including Big Ryck, Fenix, The Crew, Killshot, Puma and Sexy Star. No one believed in him. Black and Evans were the only ones that he believed, and he loves them. They celebrate and asks them to leave. He then tells The Mack, who he knows is listening, that he knows Mack isn’t built to go all night long. He’s insulted to have to share the ring with him. And everyone will believe that. The Mack arrives, they brawl, Mack lays in the stomps and then Evans and Black make the save. Mack fights back, STUNNERS for all. Mundo grabs the title and tries to escape, calling for security to save him. Stunners for security, Mack clears the ring and stands tall. Mack promises to win the title and whoop Mundo’s ass… all night long. I am usually not a big fan of the “standard interview segment” on Lucha Underground, but I thought this cam off well. Mundo did good as the cocky champion Mack got to arrive, kick ass, make the crowd happy and get momentum ahead of his title match and it just worked.
Cage vs. Veneno: Cage is sporting his new gauntlet of unknown powers. Veneno is making his debut, looks like Cortez Castro, who was given a mask by the police captain to infiltrate the Temple once again. Veneno tried to fight early, but he got cut off with a sick lariat. Steiner screwdriver by Cage and that is that. Cage defeated Veneno @ 1:20 via pin [NR] Cage destroyed him, as he should have. I also liked how they used the debut of Veneno to tie into the Sexy Star angle.
– Post match, Sexy Star attacks, assuming that Veneno (who’s mask is spider themed) is the one delivering her spiders.
– Prince Puma trains backstage as we hear Vampiro’s words of wisdom from recent weeks. Catrina arrives, tries to seduce him, and says it’s never the same once you die. Puma sees blood and pain, Mil’s… Catrina says she had a similar vision, but the blood and pain is Puma’s. She disappears, Puma does flippity doos and hits things.
DEATH MATCH: The Monster Matanza Cueto vs. Dragon Azteca Jr: Dario is out with Matanza, so they have seemingly squashed their beef. Dragon Azteca used his speed advantage early, avoiding Matanza and hitting kicks. Matanza cut him off and hit a suplex and followed with ground and pound. Matanza brought a chair into the ring, Dragon Azteca the hit the pop up RANA. He then superkicked the chair into Matanza’s face and then hit the smash mouth. Dragon Azteca sent him to the floor, hit a dive but Matanza tossed him into the post and then the wall. Matanza then carried Dragon Azteca up the steps as if he were a small child. They brawl on top of the steps, Dragon Azteca fights off a powerbomb, and then Dragon Azteca jumps into the rafters and hits a moonsault to wipe out Matanza. Dragon Azteca works over Matanza on the steps as Dario demands Matanza kill him. Dragon Azteca stuns Matanza off the banister. CHOKESLAM THROUGH THE BLEACHERS by Matanza. Smoke comes up from the hole as the ref calls off the match @ 7:00.
But then Rey Mysterio returns, and they brawl in the crowd. They brawl on top of the steps, Rey slams Matanza to a steel beam and then to the wall. Rey continues to fight back as the crowd cheers him on. Rey then backdrops Matanza into the storage room as Dario loses his shit and demands everyone leave the temple. The Monster Matanza Cueto defeated Dragon Azteca Jr @ 7:00 via Death/Ref Stoppage [***] This was a good and chaotic match, with a ton of aggression and energy but I had hoped for more.
– We get a post credit scene, where Marty creeps on Melissa Santos. Mariposa knocks him out and kidnaps him. She beats on him as he laughs and says he did good.
– End scene.
– Thanks for reading.
LUCHA UNDERGROUND REPORTEDLY RETURNS IN THE SUMMER OF 2017…
— Lucha Underground (@LuchaElRey) October 6, 2016