wrestling / TV Reports
Csonka’s Lucha Underground Review 7.01.15
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Lucha Underground 7.01.15 – Episode 34: Gold and Guerreros
OFFICIAL RESULTS
~ Texano defeated Delavar Davari @ 6:15 via pin [**½]
~ Drago defeated Hernandez @ 6:45 via pin [**½]
~ Alberto El Patron defeated Marty “The Moth Martinez @ 0:57 via submission [NR]
~ Non-Title Lucha Underground Title Match: Champion Prince Puma defeated Chavo Guerrero @ 4:55 via pin [NR – Freak Injury]
* Dario Cueto met with Chavo, and after getting the Crew and taking out Blue Demon, Chavo now gets a title shot in a NO DQ match. This was for taking out Black Lotus and delivering her to him. Chavo plans to fulfill his destiny tonight.
Delavar Davari w/Big Ryck vs. Texano Jr: This is one of the feuds that hasn’t been connecting with me. I love Texano, and I can appreciate the rich dude with the muscle, it’s just that Davari does nothing for me. I am honestly surprised that he continues to get work in major wrestling promotions. They started brawling right away, which is appreciated because they do not like each other at all and they shouldn’t be just locking up and grappling. Ryck tripped up Texano, allowing Davari to get the heat. Texano countered a RANA off the ropes late and then hit a dropkick off the ropes as they did the double down. Davari had worked the knee, applying a figure four for a bit, but Texano didn’t sell the leg very well. Texano fought off Ryck, and then hit a sitout powerbomb for the win. This was a fine opener, but didn’t do much to make me care about the feud.
* Konnan spoke with Puma as he worked out. He says Chavo is a lie and a cheat, but he’s not a champion. Catrina then appeared out of the darkness and told Puma that he would need everything he had to defeat Mil Muertes, if he survived tonight. Muertes arrived, had a stare down with Puma and then disappeared. Konnan assured Puma that it was all mind games and not to worry about it. Apparently motherfuckers teleporting around the ether doesn’t phase Konnan at all.
* After the commercial, Konnan met was having a secret meeting regarding Chavo. He knows some shit is about to go down and then said tonight, Mexico has to deliver on its promise to take out Chavo. We never got to see who Konnan was talking to.
Drago vs. Hernandez: Hernandez attacked Drago last week before his #1 contender’s match, which Drago ended up losing. This is basic follow up from that, and they worked a basic power vs. speed style match. The first four minutes or so were really soft, it wasn’t bad but I wasn’t feeling it and the live crowd wasn’t very into it either. It was missing something and lacked that energy that a lot of the LU matches have. Drago kicked things up later with some dives, leading to them brawling on the floor. Hernandez then hit a border toss onto the ring apron, which had to suck. Hernandez assaulted an “audience member,” stole his belt, and then proceeded to whip the hell out of Drago. This led to a DQ as Hernandez hung Drago over the ropes with the belt. Hernandez then cut a post match promo, noting that DRAGONS WERE NOT REAL and that Drago was just a man. This felt similar to the opener, it was largely fine and they set up for this to continue, but at times just felt as if it was “just there”. Also fuck you Hernandez, dragons are not only real but they are awesome.
* This show has been fine, but also kind of “blah” thus far.
* After the commercial, we see Chavo warming up and then the lights went out. Catrina appeared and informed him that he’s basically be dead if he beat Puma tonight; “Mil Muertes will destroy the man who holds the title” Muertes appeared and Chavo said he’d see them at Ultima Lucha. Muertes was not pleased by his answer.
Alberto el Patron vs. Marty “The Moth” Martinez: AAA Mega Heavyweight Champion of the Universe Alberto El Patron made his way to the ring. Patron vs. Mundo is official for Ultima Lucha, which had previously been announced. Patron ran wild early and then worked the arm a bit by posting Martinez, and then locked in the arm bar and that was that. Patron then cut a promo, saying thank you to Johnny Mundo. He thought that they were friends, but when Mundo attacked and tossed him through the window, he woke him up and that was Mundo’s biggest mistake. The side that is awake is vicious and ruthless, and even sadistic. And that is the part coming for Mundo at Ultima Lucha. That was a great little squash match, and also a really good promo from Patron, who continues to deliver on the mic. This was easily the best thing on the show.
Lucha Underground Title Match: Champion Prince Puma vs. Chavo Guerrero w/The Crew: Chavo was awarded the title shot for delivering Black Lotus to Dario Cueto. If Konnan gets involved, Puma loses the title. Basic beginning, very tame for a no DQ match. Chavo tried to get Konnan to get involved to cost Puma the title, but Konnan kept his distance. Chavo got legit hurt (leg injury) and the Crew got involved and attacked Puma and beat him down on the floor. The Crew continued to work over Puma and held him so that Chavo could use the frog splash, which considering the legit injury seemed completely stupid. Texano then appeared, and was Konnan’s secret weapon. He quickly took out the Crew and knocked Chavo off the ropes, and Puma then hit the 630 on Chavo and that was that. Texano then informed Chavo that Mexico was right here and coming for him. This was short, and due to the freak injury I feel impossible to give a star rating. Puma wins and retains as we continue to build to Ultima Lucha. They did the best they could all things considered.
* We see Chavo backstage, and Blue Demon Jr. arrives and laughs at him. Chavo says Demon is a has been and that Texano is really Mexico and who the fans want. Demon slams him to the locker and yells that he is Mexico. This pleased Chavo as Demon left, he may be hurt but he is stirring the pot.
* Quick promotional note. On Sunday, Pwponderings.com is going to produce a 12-hour podcast marathon. They raised over $1200 for RAINN and promised to podcast one hour for every $100 they raised. The 12-hours will feature the PwPonderings crew and gests discussing ROH, Tier 1, Women’s Wrestling and a gigantic mid-year review in the final two hours (that’s when I will be on) and more. You will be able to listen to the shows on Sunday from 11AM to 11PM ET at this link.
* End scene.
* Thanks for reading.
“Byyyyyyyyyyyyyye Felicia.”
