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Csonka’s WWE Raw Review 8.29.16
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Csonka’s WWE Raw Review 8.29.16
OFFICIAL RESULTS
– Chris Jericho defeated Neville @ 10:52 via submission [***½]
– Nia Jax defeated Hyan @ 1:14 via pin [NR]
– Sami Zayn defeated Jinder Mahal @ 3:00 via pin [NR]
– Bayley and New Day defeated Luke Gallows, Karl Anderson and Dana Brooke @ 13:15 via pin [**½]
– Bets of Seven Series: Sheamus [2] defeated Cesaro @ 11:10 via submission []
– Bran Strowman defeated Americo @ 0:59 via pin [NR]
– Darren Young defeated Titus O’Neil @ 4:00 via pin [DUD]
– Elimination Match For The Vacant Universal Title: Kevin Owens defeated Seth Rollins, Roman Reigns and Big Cass @ 25:10 via pin to become the NEW CHAMPION [****]
– In memory of Mr. Fuji.
TALKING TIME: Corey Graves is in the ring with Owens, Cass, Reigns and Rollins to hype tonight’s main event. Rollins heeled it up and took credit for hurting Balor, while Owens was a complete smart ass mocking Graves for setting up this bullshit. Owns was really good here, noting that Reigns may fight hard, but he fights smart. “Cass, you’re just big.” He also joked about Cass speaking by himself without Enzo pulling the strings. Cass said h may be new here, but he also has nothing to lose. Rollins broke it down and said that it will come down to he and Rollins, and in that case, Rollins always wins They finally went to Reigns for comment, but he just attacked Owens and we got a brief Cass and Reigns stand off. Reigns would eventually stand tall after sending Rollins to the floor. This was a pretty basic opening to set the stage for tonight’s title match. Owens was great, Cass had some strong lines and they kept it short. That’s a key here, because all too often we get close to 20-minutes in and they only had about 8-minutes of material. They got in, they got out, they kept it lively and we moved on.
– Chris Jericho did a backstage with tom Philip Phillips; he was rather great and promised to give Neville the gift of Jericho, drink it in… maaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaan.
Chris Jericho vs. Neville: Word is that Chris Jericho is doing a test cut to see if he can make the 205 weight limit on September 19th. Actually, he cost Neville his match against Owens last week and Neville wants revenge. Neville controlled early and sent Jericho to the floor. Jericho talked a bunch of shit to the crowd, so Neville attacked and then sent him back in; the high cross hit and he scored a near fall. Jericho would hide behind the ref and then use hi as a shield and get the eye poke to finally gain control. After a commercial break, Jericho worked a good heat and seemed to have a bit more pep in his step tonight working with Neville. Good comeback by Neville, scoring a near fall with the standing shooting star press. Jericho tried to take a powder, but Neville continued the attack, hitting an asai moonsault to the floor. Back in the ring, Neville hit a springboard missile dropkick for another near fall. Neville countered the Jericho bulldog, and then went for the deadlift German, they worked counters in and out of the walls and then Neville countered the code breaker and Neville planted him with a superkick. Neville missed the red arrow, landed on his feet and rolled through but then Jericho countered a RANA into the old school liontamer for the win. Damn fine match there, I’ve given Jericho a fair share of grief for some of his in ring this year, but he was motivated and worked hard here. If Neville has to lose, this is the kind of match he needs to take clean losses in. he went step for step with Jericho, and only lost because the veteran was one step ahead of him.
– We see Bayley arriving earlier today handing out hugs, she has a backpack on and looks as if she is attending the first of day of school. She meets with New Day, who sing for her, and she does the hip swivel deal with them until Dana Brooke arrives and tries to ruin things. After some back and forth, they seemingly set up a mixed tag with Doc and Karl also involved as Dana name dropped them.
Nia Jax vs. Hyan: Jax dominated at the bell, hitting a lariat and then tossing Hyan around. She hit her sitout side slam deal for the win. That needs a name. Jax dominated a she should as they continue set her as the monster of the women’s division.
– Doc and Karl did comedy, they aren’t doctors anymore, they are into retirement services. Their services are called OLDFART. Dana Brooke played their nurse. UGH. That was a Vince special, he leaky thinks it’s hilarious.
Nurse @DanaBrookeWWE is ready to assist @LukeGallowsWWE and @KarlAndersonWWE in their new venture… #RAW pic.twitter.com/ibE893ivC1
— WWE Universe (@WWEUniverse) August 30, 2016
– We get a video package for Seth Rollins.
Sami Zayn vs. Jinder Mahal: Zayn is still selling the ankle from last week. Zayn countered and hit the leg lariat, again selling the ankle. Zayn was slowed, which allowed Mahal to attack and work him over with strikes and a back elbow. The crowd does not care at all as Mahal worked a short heat. Zayn hit the lariat and corner XPLODER; the helluva kick finished it. This was simply there to give Zayn a rehab victory after last week’s loss. Remember when Sami Zayn won his epic, feud ending match against Kevin Owens? Neither does WWE.
Sasha Banks Injury Update: Charlotte joins the commentary team. They go to pre-show footage, and Banks said that Charlotte tried to injure her at the PPV and he back went out on her. She’s focused on making her comeback and will take her title back. She will be back better than ever. Charlotte says she won on her own so what’s Banks’ excuse? Also, this was not much of an update.
Yep, @WWEBigE can get down just as easily to @itsBayleyWWE's music! #RAW pic.twitter.com/zL1NAWnjlT
— WWE Universe (@WWEUniverse) August 30, 2016
Luke Gallows, Karl Anderson and Dana Brooke vs. Bayley, Big E and Kofi Kingston w/Xavier Woods: Bayley and Brooke started, going back and forth. Brooke slammed her to the corner, but Bayley fired up and slammed Broke to the corner repeatedly. Big E and Karl in now, Kofi also in and they worked double teams on Karl but Gallows got in a cheap shot as Brooke distracted the ref. Short heat on Big E, Kofi and Karl tagged in and Kofi ran wild with strikes and a dropkick. He hit the boom drop, but missed trouble in paradise. We then got the unicorn stampede in the corner on Karl. Bayley even got involved with the dropkick to the corner, Brooke then bumped way early and awkwardly off of a dropkick. Bayley celebrated with Big E and Kofi and they danced as we went to the commercial break. Post break, Karl was working the heat on Kofi. Kofi tried to fight back but ate a spinebuster, allowing Karl to keep control. Gallows then just largely grounded Kofi. Kofi eventually fought them off and tried for the tag but Gallows pulled Big E to the floor. This lost a ton of steam after the break. Kofi finally got the tag to Bayley, and the crowd woke up. Bayley ran wild on Brooke, went for the cover but Karl saved Brooke. It broke down, Kofi almost died on a dive as he over shot Gallows and ate mostly floor. Bayley to belly on Brooke and that was that. They had some great momentum building to the commercial break, and then lost it post break. Bayley’s closing stretch and win got it back but it was an overall average outing. The crowd loved Bayley.
– Cesaro speaks backstage and is questioned about losing and going down 2-0 against Sheamus. He knows that he will come back and beat up on Sheamus, which will make it a great day because no one likes Sheamus.
– Daniel Bryan will address the situation with the Miz on Smackdown tomorrow.
– We get a video package for Big Cass.
Best of Seven Series Match: Sheamus [1] vs. Cesaro [0]: Sheamus cut a pre-match promo in the ring, running down Cesaro for not being handsome like him and noting that he has been constantly fighting and failing to become champion. Sheamus will prove that he is better. This is the second match in the best of seven series; Sheamus is up 1-0. Cesaro smartly went for covers and various pinning combos early, playing into the fact that he is down 1-0. Sheamus was sent to the floor, favoring his elbow as Cesaro laid in uppercuts. Back in Sheamus begged off and anted the ref to check his elbow, but Cesaro attacked anyway. Cesaro then sent Sheamus to the floor as we took a commercial break. Post break Sheamus kept the heat, hitting the Irish curse for the near fall. Cesaro fought off the cloverleaf, and then ht the sweet springboard uppercut for the double down. They picked up he pacing and had some good, and hard hitting back and forth. Sheamus tried to cheat with the ropes on a pin, Cesaro survived and worked the running uppercuts and then ht he dropkick in the corner. On the floor, Sheamus backdropped a charging Cesaro into the post. Back in, Sheamus locked in the cloverleaf and Cesaro had to tap right away. I really liked the finish, it put over the post spot, and also the cloverleaf as a viable submission for Sheamus while putting Cesaro predictably down early. This was another very good outing for these two, on par with their Summerslam effort.
– We get a video package in remembrance of Mr. Fuji.
– We now get a video package for Kevin Owens.
Bran Strowman vs. Americo: Strowman killed the little scared masked man good and quick. He even unmasked him post match. Again, these are fine to get Strowman on TV and make him appear to be a killer, but I hope they are booking him in 10-20-minute matches on the live events so he can really improve.
– Stephanie walks.
– Following the destruction of the little Americo, we get a video package for the Cruiserweight Division! Tomasso Ciampa, Cedric Alexander, and Johnny Gargano were featured.
Stephanie McMahon is Here to Make Paul Heyman Talk: She was not pleased with Brock Lesnar attack on Shane, but before she could get going, Paul Heyman cut her off. He tried to apologize, Stephanie wanted nothing of it. The crow d tried to chant for ECW, and Stephanie did a nice job of stopping that by reminding us that she “bought ECW” from Heyman. Heyman said that Lesnar’s victory was a victory for Raw, and then offered to pay the $500 fine. He pulled out a pile of singles and started to drop them n the mat as the crowd chanted along. Stephanie slapped the cash from his hands and ran him down and promised to avenge her brother. I somehow doubt her sincerity. Heyman then said that Lesnar was the storm and that he and Lesnar put her in a compromising position with the board of directors and with Vince McMahon. Stephanie has to prove that she can control Raw and Lesnar is the one fighter on the brand and sets back the women’s empowerment movement. Ok. Heyman said Stephanie was the heir to the boardroom, the one that he and Lesnar backs. After the Heyman mind games, he wants her to accept the apology and the money. She does as Heyman smiles as if he got one over n her. That was an odd segment. I am not really sure what that accomplished other than Heyman playing his games to keep he and Lesnar in the good graces of whoever is in charge. In that regard, it felt like the same angle repeated because they have to kill time until they bring Lesnar back. This was a filler segment. This was fine delivery from both, but the same content that we’ve seen before because they don’t have solid ways to write Lesnar in and out of the product.
– We see footage of Finn Balor’s injury at Summerslam. We also get images from his surgery.
– We now get a video package for Roman Reigns.
Titus O’Neil vs. Darren Young w/Bob Backlund: Young controlled early until he took a wild bump over the corner and to the floor. It looked as if it sucked, and no one really card about it. O’Neil took the heat control, 2016 “heat” as a matter of fact with a lot of yelling and slow grounded offense. O’Neil worked neck cranks as the crowd disappeared into silence. Young then got a shit crucifix for the win out of nowhere. He also sent O’Neil to the floor as Young and Backlund acted as if they accomplished something. But this wasn’t over because O’Neil came right back and laid both Young and Backlund out to get his heat back and this feud must continue because we cannot have nice things. The wrestling was embarrassingly bad and there was no heat to this at all. This was the drizzling shits and really pathetic that guys that have been on the main roster for so long get TV time to put on such poor performances. But hey, by all means, keep them on TV while Nakamura, Joe, Aries and Roode and are wasting away in front of 200 people in Largo.
– Foley apologized to Stephanie for not having her back. They then agreed o ban all friends and such from ringside tonight for the title match. Rollins arrived and promised to win the title, and Stephanie said it was his night as they hugged.
– Stephanie and Foley are ringside for the main event.
– Enzo and Cass did some mic work pre-match as Big Cass promised to shock the world and win the title. Cass and Owens got huge reactions, Cass even more so than Owens.
For The Vacant Universal Title: Big Cass vs. Kevin Owens vs. Seth Rollins vs. Roman Reigns: Owens bailed to the floor at the bell, they teased Cass vs. Reigns early but Owens put a stop to that. After some floor brawling, Rollins and Cass worked for a bit in the ring as Reigns and Owens returned. The pairs fought in the corners as Cass sent Rollins to the floor. They again teased Cass and Reigns, and this time they did brawl. The crowd was way into Cass, who countered the Superman punch and then sent Reigns to the floor with the bog boot; Cass went over as well. Rollins hit the dive, but Owens took him out. Reigns then followed with the big over the top (almost ate all floor) rope dive to send us to a commercial. That was a really good opening stretch with great energy. Post break, Owens worked over Cass, hitting the Cactus Jack elbow to the floor. Rollins took him out and tried a cover on Cass in the ring, but only got 2. Owens returned, taking out Rollins and scoring a near fall on Cass. Owens worked the leg of Cass to try and break the big man down, Rollins cut off the cannonball and slammed Owens to the barricade. Rollins was starting to roll but Reigns returned to cut him off. Owens back as well as all four men are in, but Cass wiped out Reigns with the big boot. Cass hit hr corner splashes to Owens and Rollins, big boot sent Owens to the floor and then hit the empire elbow to Rollins. Superman punch by Reigns, but he then posted himself. Superkick to Cass but Rollins only got two. Owens then hit the frog splash to Cass to eliminate him at 12:40. Cass got a lot of time to shine (looked good overall) and didn’t lose to any fluke bullshit, the elimination was well done as he took the superman punch, superkick and then the frog splash before losing. This was a good night in the early main roster career of Cass. Post break we got a tower of doom, but Rollins and Owens survived. Reigns worked the corner clotheslines to Rollins, hit the big boot and looked for the Superman punch. Rollins avoided it and then sidestepped Reigns and sent him to the floor. Reigns failed again with the Superman and Rollins hit the falcon arrow (HE DID THE DEAL!) for a near fall. Reigns countered the pedigree, and then hit the Superman punch as Rollins flew in off of a springboard for a great near fall. Reigns sold the frustration well, playing into the deal that he cannot beat Rollins. The spear was countered by the knee, superkick by Owens on Rollins and cannonballs for all! Reigns then cut him off with the Superman for a near fall. Things are escalating well here. Owens went for the pop up powerbomb, but Reigns countered with the Superman. Rollins stopped that but ate the sitout powerbomb, great near fall again. They have the crowd reacting to everything here as Reigns hit he drive by on Rollins. He then hit the Superman to Owens on the floor and a spear to Rollins as he has taken over. TRIPLE H APPEARED AND PEDIGREED REIGNS ON THE FLOOR! He rolled Rollins in and Rollins pinned Reigns. Triple H rolled in Owens, and then TRIPEL H TURNED ON ROLLINS and PEDIGREED HIM! He gave the nod to Owens, who then covered and won the title! I am beyond happy for Kevin Owens, he deserves this chance to run with the title. An overall excellent main event with everyone delivering to make it a great close to the show.
– Triple H grabbed the title, shook hands with Kevin Owens and handed him the title.
– Even though he won by fuckery, the crowd chanted YOU DESERVE IT to Owens as the show closed.
– End scene.
– Thanks for reading.
“Byyyyyyyyyyyyyye Felicia.”
