Csonka’s WWE Smackdown Review 4.09.15

Introduction
As a reminder, this will not be another traditional recap, but instead it will be a mash up of the Rs, Instant Analysis and my usual Twitter ramblings I would do during the shows; completely uncensored and as the ideas flow unfiltered to the old keyboard. Remember, this is a review; and I am here to review the show. As always, I encourage discussion and even disagreement, just do so in a respectful manner. I will be doing the review for Raw and most PPVs and iPPVs going forward.

Thursday Night Smackdown 4.09.15

OFFICIAL RESULTS
~ Non-Title Match: Champions Kidd & Cesaro defeated New Day @ 8:20 via pin [**½]
~ Neville defeated Curtis Axel @ 2:15 via pin [NR]
~ Natalya defeated Alicia Fox @ 3:50 via submission [**]
~ Bray Wyatt defeated Erick Rowan @ 6:59 via pin [**]
~ Daniel Bryan, Dolph Ziggler, and Roman Reigns defeated Big Show, Bad News Barrett, and Sheamus @ 13:42 via pin [***½]

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Daniel Bryan Talks: We get highlights of last week’s main event, where Bryan got his melon split open in a match vs. Sheamus. Bryan’s proud to be the IC Champion and wants to defend it and to make it important. Bryan continued on in typical WWE promo style, telling the story of the recent events before getting predictably interrupted by Barrett and Sheamus. Sheamus ran down midgets like Bryan, and then threatened to give Bryan a European style beat down. Cue Ziggler, bad comedy and then he challenged them to fight. Oh Jesus, for some reason Big Show thought he was important and came out and complained about the little guys complaining. Seriously. And now Roman Reigns is out. The faces cleared the ring, for the second week in a row we won’t get the advertised main event because…

This was your completely average, completely predictable and completely formulaic WWE opening promo segment. I swear to God that they have a Mad Libs styled book called TALKING TO OPEN SHOWS, and they just replace the names and such week in and out.

* New Day came out; the crowd said they sucked as Big E says that they are clapping for the fans. He asked the fans to clap for them, and they did and continued to tell them they sucked. Big E said something had to change and that the fans had to like and even love them, because they are here for the fans. They could actually do something with this (the guys are talented) if they just have these guys snap and go wild on some people. Hell, with the shit booking of them, have them take out the Ascension and end that experiment.

Non-Title Match: Champions Kidd & Cesaro vs. New Day Sucks (Big E & Kofi) w/Woods: They went through the commercial break, as New Day worked a bit more aggressively again this time out. Kofi talked trash as they had the heat on Big E, and then eventually got the hot tag and ran wild on Kidd for a bit. Kofi got distracted on the NEW DAY SUCKS chants, Big E and Cesaro got involved and when the ref was distracted by Big E, the champions took out Kofi with an uppercut and then the fisherman’s neck breaker to score the win. This was a perfectly fine match, which the champions dominated as they should right now. They still need to build credibility as the champions, and the New Day is falling apart. Kidd & Cesaro winning due to better teamwork and being focused works as the New Day breaks down before they snap for the full heel turn. I liked what they did here.

* We get highlights from Raw involving the Rollins vs. Orton angle.

* Axelmania is in the ring, and demands a rematch with Neville.

Neville vs. Curtis Axel: Axel was more aggressive and actually got in a bit of offense, but he still lost when Neville hit the red arrow. Axel lasted about 50-seconds longer than he did when they had the Raw match, so good on him. All in all I guess that the win is here is a recovery spot, since Neville lost on Raw; but I don’t see how it helps when he beat the same comedy goof he already beat in under 90-seconds two weeks ago. Just give him another opponent and have him show off a bit; hell even a guy like Ryder would be perfect because you can say he is a former tag team and US champion to prop up Neville a bit more.

* Cameron, Alicia Fox and Natalya cat fight over the diva’s #1 contender’s battle royal on Monday. Cameron says she’s been around for three years, which says all kinds of shit about her lack of ability. They had a horrible shoving battle, and they face-off next.

Alicia Fox vs. Natalya: Cameron is the special guest referee here to play off of the previous segment. They brawled early, slapped each other around and even rolled around a bit as they tried to sell the anger from the previous segment. They worked a solid match; Fox took most of it but Natalya countered a sunset flip late and scored the win with the sharp shooter. Cameron is a way better referee than a wrestler. Post match Cameron hit DDTs on both ladies to stand tall and to add some more build to the diva’s #1 contender’s battle royal on Monday. The action we perfectly fine for the time they got, and I appreciate that they are building to the battle royal, even if it isn’t needed.

* We get a video package on Erick Rowan, narrated by Bray Wyatt, discussing that he fixed him and then set him free.

Bray Wyatt vs. Erick Rowan: Wyatt talked more about Rowan being lost and cast out by society. He fixed him because he saw possibility in him, but now he is broken again. This is all fantastic, but I don’t see how anyone could care about Rowan the way that he has been booked. I hope that they put him back with Wyatt; the worst mistake that was made was the “non-breakup breakup” of the Wyatt Family. It was lazy, and they had NO plan for Rowan, and only part of a plan for Harper. Anyway, he says that if he can destroy someone he loved and called a brother, imagine what I could do “to you”. Rowan was angry so he controlled early, Wyatt then gained control when Rowan posted himself and then, for some reason, this of all matches went through the commercial. Bray mostly controlled from there on, hit the body block and Sister Abigail for the win. Bray won, which is fine, and then cuddled with Rowan. If he was really going to do something, he should have just beat the living shit out of the man and destroyed him to take him off TV. He did big old monologue about building him up, that he was broken and then he had to take him out (selling that if he can destroy someone he loved and called a brother, imagine what I could do “to you”) and then won a decently hard-hitting wrestling match. I felt it lacked in what they were really going for here, especially following that promo from Wyatt.

MIZ TV IS STILL A THING?: Miz bragged about the new Marine movie, and we got to see a trailer for it. Summer Rae, his co-star in the film, arrived and complained that it was “their film” and not “his”. Miz claimed that he “gave a diva a chance” by putting her in the movie ad making her famous, just like he did for Sandow. She then mocked him for getting eliminated by Sandow at Mania; they had some back and forth and Sandow then came out. Miz said they could go back to where they were before all of this went down if Sandow just apologized. They shook hands and Sandow said, “I’m sorry I didn’t do this sooner” and attacked. Miz ran away, Sandow kissed Summer Rae and the segment ended. The “acting” between Miz and Summer was not good, and this whole thing felt off to me. I think that this segment needed to come first and then they should have done the match that took place on Monday. Sandow following up on the Mania attack by standing up to Miz again so solidify the split and then doing the first match where shitty heel Miz cheats to win (like he did on Monday) makes way more sense to me. It doesn’t feel as if they have the feud planned out that well, which scares me because if they aren’t careful Sandow can flop quickly. He can’t be Miz 2.0 forever, and if the feud and final transformation away from Miz isn’t crafted well then they will hurt both performers. Sandow was the best performer in an overall mistimed and poorly done segment.

* Highlights from WrestleMania week.

Daniel Bryan, Dolph Ziggler, and Roman Reigns vs. Big Show, Bad News Barrett, and Sheamus: The super bully heel team worked over Ziggler early, he got a hot tag to Bryan and he ran wild for a bit and then they got the second heat on him. Reigns got the hot tag, and after his run it broke down at the end; a superkick from Ziggler took out Sheamus, Reigns hit Show and Barrett with Superman punches, Bryan took out Show with a flying knee strike off of the apron and then Reigns hit a spear on Barrett to score the win for his team. This was a fun main event, with guys that work well together, and Big Show. Seriously, can I just have the tag team match that they have advertised for the last two weeks instead of shoehorning Show and Reigns into the situation? Anyway, I liked the match as it was a strong way to close the show.

* End scene.

* Thanks for reading.

“Byyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyye Felicia!”

6.0

The final score: review Average

The 411

Tonight’s show felt much like last week’s effort, in that it wasn’t a bad show, but it felt like a very average effort. The good news is that we got rid of the non-finishes from last week, but outside of the main event the wrestling was largely just there, average. Again it’s not bad, just average. I feel that the Miz/Sandow feud is happening a bit out of order, and the “acting” in the segment between Miz and Summer Rae was not good. Neville really should have faced a fresh opponent. He won, which is good and he does a lot of cool shit that people like, but there was no need to face Axel again. Wyatt really should have destroyed Rowan to play off of the promo better; that simply felt unfulfilling. They did some build for the diva’s battle royal, and the main event (which was enjoyable) did a solid job of setting the stage for the three singles matches that are coming. Again, this wasn’t a bad show, but right now it just feels like it exists.