wrestling / Columns

Greg DeMarco’s Bold Predictions for the 2017 WWE Royal Rumble

January 29, 2017 | Posted by Greg De Marco
Roman Reigns Image Credit: WWE

On Sunday, January 28th, the WWE presents their annual Royal Rumble pay-per-view. This is the thirtieth Royal Rumble—a point that seems to be cast aside as the WWE reminds us all to “remember the Rumble.”

As if we’d forget one of the most celebrated matches of the year.

The first (televised) Royal Rumble was won by “Hacksaw” Jim Duggan, and was of the 20-man variety. It also followed more of a “Saturday Night’s Main Event” feel as the Rumble was in the middle of the show, with the “main event” being The Islanders vs. The Young Stallions in a 2-out-of-3 falls match.

Yes, you read that right. The Young Stallions main evented the first ever Royal Rumble!

Big John Studd would win the next, followed by back-to-back Hulk Hogan victories. Ric Flair won the famous 1992 Royal Rumble from the #3 spot, winning the vacant WWF World Heavyweight Championship in the process. It was the next year, 1993, that the Royal Rumble would be granted the WrestleMania world title shot, as Yokozuna won the Royal Rumble and went on to challenge Bret Hart at WrestleMania IX (Hulk Hogan would walk out of that show as world champ, because Vince McMahon).

The aforementioned Vince McMahon, or in this case Mr. McMahon, also won a Royal Rumble. He won the 1999 edition, but lost his WrestleMania title shot to “Stone Cold” Steve Austin at the February “St. Valentine’s Day Massacre: In Your House” pay-per-view event.

Oh and that Stone Cold fella I mentioned? He’s the only guy to win three—1997, 1988, and 2001.

The 2017 edition features a stacked lineup of part-timers and regulars, and is largely considered one of the most difficult Royal Rumble matches to predict. The betting odds match up, as the favorite has gone from Chris Jericho to The Undertaker to Goldberg to (most recently) Randy Orton.

So precisely what is going to happen at the Royal Rumble? Hell if I know! I leave that to our team here at 411Mania to figure out!

Because contained below are bold predictions for the event. Not likely to happen, these are indeed B.O.L.D.: Bullheaded, Outlandish, Lascivious, and Deplorable. But if—I mean when!—one hits, I can promise you’ll never hear the end of it!

A Very Roman Rumble

Everyone seems to think Roman Reigns is going to win the WWE Universal Championship at the Royal Rumble, and for a while the betting odds agreed. I disagree, I think a caged Chris Jericho is going to find some way to help his friend below, and Kevin Owens is going to continue to survive as the WWE Universal Champion.

What does that mean for Roman Reigns? A spot in the 2017 Royal Rumble, that’s what!

The three-time former world champion joins John Cena as one of the most polarizing superstars in WWE history. He’s also insanely underrated and underappreciated because of his meteoric rise in an era of independent/internet darlings finding their way into the WWE at a great rate.

So after Roman gets screwed by Jericho in his championship match, he tells Kayla Braxton (at least that’s who *I* want him to tell!) that he’s not done yet. Everyone is left to speculate as to what that means, and the answer is revealed when Roman Reigns comes out in the middle of the Royal Rumble.

And he probably eliminates The Undertaker in the process, because the Dead Man needs a match for WrestleMania!

TEN? No…Eleven

I don’t even think this is bold, honestly. I think it’s obvious.

Tye Dillinger has become one of the most beloved stars of WWE NXT, to the point that it’s almost a shame that he’s not currently challenging for the NXT Championship. He’s also been in and out of the WWE for over a decade, even appearing back on the old WWECW show.

Now he seems poised to hit the WWE main roster, at least temporarily, at the Royal Rumble. And what better position for him to enter than…10.

There really is no better place for him to debut, and not doing this will leads to chants of “TEN!” and “WE WANT TYE!” throughout the Rumble.

But I don’t think The Perfect Ten enters at #10, I think he shows up at…ELEVEN!

Why? Because why not!?!? The reaction would be priceless, and for 90ish seconds you’d have a San Antonio crowd—many of whom will no doubt be chanting “ROYAL RUMBLE!” and “NUMBER TEN!” at Tye during Takeover—booing the shit out of the match because Curtis Axel entered in the tenth position. But when his theme hits at #11, it’ll get an even bigger pop.

I don’t know if Tye sticks around or returns after the draft, but this is the type of moment the Royal Rumble is about—and him entering at number of eleven not only caps off an amazing two minute roller-coaster ride, but it reminds us that the Royal Rumble is based on a random draw.

KENNY!

I said it best on Twitter, and I’ll say it here:

The WWE knows how to troll their audience. So imagine it when the clock expires… and the video board goes black… only to be adorned by the word “KENNY.”

Then out comes Kenny Dykstra, aka Spirit Squad Kenny! What’s more, Kenny lasts a good while in the Rumble! I mean, Smackdown can use a good hand like Kenny, and this would be a great way to draw heat for him.

Samoa Joe Does NOT Enter The Rumble…

Samoa Joe showed up at NXT Takeover, and was given the front row treatment usually reserved for an outsider. It seems slightly odd since he was only recently on NXT programming, and is a two-time NXT Champion.

But he obviously is an outsider, because his time in NXT should be over. He’ll appear at the Royal Rumble and kick off the main roster career he’s deserved for quite some time.

But I said AT the Rumble, not IN the Rumble. You see that’s because Joe’s presence will be felt before the Royal Rumble, when he attacks John Cena and costs him the WWE World Championship. This, of course, sets up John Cena vs. Samoa Joe at WrestleMania 33, giving Joe a major feud with one of his best friends.

And that’s a very good thing. Because if you think about John Cena’s style, one man who seems like he’d mesh very well with Cena is Samoa Joe.

Your Winner Is…AWWWWWWWWESOMMMMMMMME!

I’ve already detailed it here, but my actual prediction for the Royal Rumble winner is already quite bold. Outside of AJ Styles, no one has had a better past 12 months than The Miz, and honestly no one is more deserving.

Ths isn’t a new thought, either.

The Miz is, hands down, THE choice to win the match. The only other “entrant” who has me concerned is Finn Balor, and we don’t even know if he’ll actually be in the match. But imagine if he is—and The Miz eliminates him to win?

Nuclear. Heat.

Same goes for Shinsuke Nakamura, who I could see being a surprise entrant as well.

What craziness do YOU expect to go down at the Royal Rumble? Share in the comments below!

More Trending Stories

article topics :

Royal Rumble, WWE, Greg De Marco

More Stories

loading