The Name on the Marquee: NWA World Championship Wrestling (11.9.1985)

-Originally aired November 9, 1985.

-Your hosts are Tony Schiavone & David Crockett. Arn Anderson strolls in, holding the NWA Television Title even though the NWA board of directors has held up the title. Anderson says he took the belt from Dusty Rhodes and it’s his. Ole steps in and warns everybody that if Jim Crockett or 40 wrestlers in a tournament want it, they’re gonna have to get it.

“Ragin’ Bull” MANNY FERNANDEZ vs VERNE DEATON
-First Teddy Long sighting of my reviews! Manny targets the chest with forearms and chops, and the studio audience is just totally SILENT this week. I feel like I’m watching tennis.

-Hammerlock by Fernandez, and Tony says with a straight face that it’s an unusual strategy because “that’s not a part of the body that he applies the burrito on.” Fernandez connects with the flying burrito, and then drives a knee into Deaton from the second rope to get the three count.

-Tony welcomes the National Champion, Terry Taylor. Taylor confirms that he does have an opponent for The Gathering, and he can’t wait to defend it. He won’t tell us who his opponent is for the moment though. Why?

OLE & ARN ANDERSON (National Tag Team Champions) vs JIMMY BLACK & KEITH FREEZE
-Arn waves the TV Title around and dares Dusty to “come and get it!”

-Arn slams Black and works his arm, then drags him over to the ropes to work his neck over, and Black is so scrawny that every rib is visible when Arn stretches him. How did he ever become a gigalo?

-Ole drives the boots into Black. Freeze tags in and Ole tortures him with an armbar. Hammerlok slam by Arn, and the Gourdbuster gets three. Fans give the Andersons a round of applause. Buncha smarks. They’ll never do another TV taping in Atlanta now.

-Tony Schiavone talks to Tully Blanchard. We watch Magnum TA molest Baby Doll. David Crockett eagerly screaming “She likes it! She likes it!” makes it twice as creepy, actually. Tully lashes out at the “omnipotent Jim Crockett” for going over the entire NWA’s heads and getting an “I Quit” match at Starrcade ’85. Tully warns Magnum not to even bother showing up. He already showed that he’s willing to do anything to win that title, but wait until you see what he’ll do to retain it.

KHRUSHER KHRUSHCHEV, IVAN & NIKITA KOLOFF vs JIMMY LANGSTON, KENT GLOVER, & LARRY CLARK
-Khrusher starts with Clark. Clark tries to wring his arm, and the commentators have a funny reaction, acting disappointed in the jobber for even trying. Khrusher press slams him, and Ivan steps in and rips away at Clark’s face. Nikita boots and clubbers him. One of the other jobbers tags in and the Russians do the polite thing and take turns killing him too. Nikita throws him over to his corner to tag in the guy who hasn’t been in yet Nikita lets him have a few punches, just to give him some false hope, and the sickle finishes impressively. Jobber looks like he’s going to need scraped off the mat.

ROCK & ROLL EXPRESS vs JIM & MAC JEFFERS
-Morton criss-crosses and flips Jim over his head. Jim has NO neck. None, he goes straight from chin to chest.

-Morton legtrips Mac, and in comes Robert Gibson. Side headlock is applies, and Morton comes back in with a dropkick that connects with a SMACK. Moton goes to work on the arm and drags Jim over to his corner just so Gibson can do it too. Fistdrop off the second rope by Morton. They go back to work on the arm and they stay on it.

-Double elbows on Jim, and the double dropkick finishes him off.

STARRCADE ’85 UPDATE
-Khrusher Khruschev will face Sam Houston to determine the new Mid-Atlantic Heavyweight Champion. The title was vacated in JULY and they’re just now dealing with that. The previous title holder, Buzz Tyler walked out of the company over Dusty allegedly owing him a few bucks, and apparently part of the delay in finally addressing this was that he took the belt with him and a new one had to be made. Jim Crockett announces four more matches: Terry Taylor vs. Buddy Landell for the National Heavyweight Title (and they announce it with an odd slow-mo clip of Buddy botching an elbow). In an Atlanta Street Fight, Jim Cornette & The Midnight Express will battle Jimmy Valiant and the mysterious fan who keeps interfering in his matches. She’s been identified as Miss Atlanta Lively. You know her as Ron Garvin in drag. Superstar Billy Graham and the Barbarian will compete in a $10,000 arm wrestling match, and immediately after, they’ll have a wrestling match.

-We go to action from Worldwide Wrestling, with Superstar Billy Graham calling out The Barbarian and Paul Jones and getting himself busted open in the ensuing melee. I’d really rather see Worldwide on the Network than the TBS show. Fans were just CRAZY passionate in the arenas for that show.

-We go to the Omni this past Sunday, where Dusty Rhodes shocks the world by returning well ahead of everyone’s expectations and finishing off his opponent with a figure four. Jim Crockett gets on the mic after the match and confirms that Dusty has signed a contract to wrestle Ric Flair in Atlanta on Thanksgiving night, so our main event is set.

-We go to later in the Omni show, as Dusty is so well recovered that he worked double duty that night, competing in a six-man tag. He pins Ole Anderson clean as a sheet and has a staredown with Flair.

BILLY JACK HAYNES vs THUNDERFOOT (with JJ Dillon)
-Thunderfoot is a masked man who wears two different boots, one with a white sole and one with a black sole, leading many fans to suspect that he’s going something illegal with one boot. My guess is he’s just a huge Punky Brewster fan.

-Thunderfoot loses a test of strength and Haynes gives him a skullcracker for good measure. Haynes hiptosses and armdrags Thunderfoot around. Hammerlock by Haynes. Haynes stays on the arm. Manny Fernandez shows up to provide guest commentary while JJ Dillon suddenly gets involved behind the referee’s back.

-Front facelock by Thunderfoot while Fernandez admits that he’s scouting Haynes because he thinks he and Haynes would make a great tag team together. Front facelock by Thunderfoot, with JJ infuriating the commentary team by reaching in and jiggling Thunderfoot’s foot, which…helps somehow, I guess. Fernandez tells us “Billy Jack Haynes doesn’t know the word quit! In fact, I bet he can’t even spell it!”

-Haynes makes a comeback with chops and drives a knee into Thunderfoot’s chest from the second rope. He starts to finish with the full nelson, but JJ gets on the apron to provide distraction. Manny runs over to tattle on Thunderfoot for loading his boot behind the referee’s back. Thunderfoot denies it, then turns around to unload the boot, and Haynes runs over and rolls him up for three. Billy Jack’s arm work wore thin after a while, but other than that it was a decent match.

-Billy Jack says he loves his dad and that’s why he changed his name. He promises to tear some people apart at Starrcade, while Manny Fernandez promises to enter the TV Title tournament, despite rumors that it’s going to be a “100-man tournament.” Come on!

-Dusty is in the building, thanking his doctors and Jim Crockett for their support during his injury. Ric Flair has put HARD TIMES on this country and Dusty Rhodes. It’s actually almost word for word the famous promo that he cut after Starrcade. He says that when he went down, wrestling fans everywhere went down with him. Ric Flair has got himself into some risky business, daddy, and he’s going to lose the one thing that he actually cares about in the world.

RON GARVIN vs PAUL GARNER
-Hard chops by Garvin, who is sporting a mullet. It looks like he scalped Greg Valentine and is just wearing the whole thing. Mat wrestling by Garvin, and Garner wriggles his way to the ropes to get free. Garvin with more chops and an abdominal stretch. Garner gets to the ropes, but Garvin just sticks with the chops and brings him down with a front facelock.

-Knee to the throat by Garvin, and he keeps it there while rolling Garner over and applying a hammerlock. That’s amazing and painful looking, and David Crockett’s “don’t try this at home” is completely appropriate.

-Garvin just twists Garner all over the mat, stretching his arms and wrenching his neck, and the sadistic crowd is chanting “Break it!” Garner gets free and charges at him, but runs right into a hand of stone and he’s out cold. Garvin calmly sits on him and gets the three-count.

-Tony Schiavone talks to The Russians, who held the six-man tag cup for over a year and couldn’t get beaten, so they said the hell with it and stopped defending the cup, and now they’re amassing quite a collection of belts.

THE BARBARIAN (with Paul Jones) vs GERALD FINLEY
-Pointless anecdote: You know how WWE is always telling us “You need to see Big Show in person to appreciate how big he is”? The only time I had to see a guy in person to appreciate it, it was Barbarian. I met him at an indy show a few years ago. That guy is just solid brick and definitely a guy you want standing behind you if trouble breaks out. SUPER nice, too.

-Barbarian slams Finley and drops the leg. He drives a series of headbutts into Finley’s shoulder. Top rope headbutt finishes Finley off. Told you he was nice. If he was mean, he would have continued kicking Finley’s ass.

-Arn is out to cut a second promo, because he’s Arn Anderson and who the hell is going to complain if Arn wants to talk twice. Arn points out that Tully Blanchard is in the ring, and it turns out to be a pretty famous promo as Arn refers to himself, Ole, Tully, and Ric Flair as the Four Horsemen of wrestling—the guys who make things happen. Ole steps in and promises that Cousin Ric won’t be alone at Starrcade.

TULLY BLANCHARD (United States Champion, with Baby Doll) vs JOE MALCOLM
-This is pretty slick. Arn wraps up his promo by saying “Tully, show Magnum what you’re gonna do.” And we cut to the ring and the bell sounding. Tully knocks Malcolm around with knees and sends him out to the floor. Joe Malcolm is wearing monogrammed tights with the initials BJ, by the way.

-BJoe throws a few weak punches, but Tully shakes them right off and finishes right away with a slingshot suplex.

-Paul Jones replays the Barbarian’s attack on Superstar Billy Graham to remind us what happens to people who put their hands on Paul Jones.

TERRY TAYLOR (National Heavyweight Champion) vs AMOS MOSES
-Taylor wrings Moses’ arm really hard, apparently pissed off about having that damn song stuck in his head. Taylor slams Moses and drops an elbow. Moses is just a spitting image of Victor French, by the way. I’ll pause while everyone Googles Victor French and yells “Oh, that guy.”

-Kneelift by Taylor as the commentators have so little to work with here that they wish a happy 69th anniversary to a couple of viewers. Superplex by Taylor finishes.

-Rock & Roll Express promises us that Rock & Roll is forever baby!

6.7

The final score: review Average

The 411

Gotta hand it to these folks, they know how to hype a once-a-year supershow.