The Name on the Marquee: NWA World Championship Wrestling (5.31.1986)

-Cold open: The James Gang and the Midnight Express get into a brawl, and it looks like Frank’s mask is about to come off…

-Originally aired May 31, 1986.

-Only a one-hour show this week, so this is perfect for killing time before I leave for Vegas…

-Your hosts are Tony Schiavone & David Crockett. Dusty Rhodes and Baby Doll are here, with Dusty wearing a tremendous “America’s Team” t-shirt depicting himself wearing a fur coat and a top hat. I want to own this t-shirt, immerse myself in this t-shirt, and enter new worlds where this t-shirt is my key. Baby Doll promises to get her hands on Jim Cornette before the end of the Bash tour.

HECTOR GUERRERO & “Ragin’ Bull” MANNY FERNANDEZ vs THUNDERFOOT & BOB OWENS
-Hector’s NWA run is just such a strange case looking at it now, as it appears that the NWA wanted him around but absolutely could not think of anything to do with him. Granted, he’s hardly an isolated case in wrestling history, but it’s still interesting to see.

-The Tex-Mex Connection works Thunderfoot’s arm, and it’s worth noting that they’re color-coordinated from head-to-toe, which makes me think Manny’s imminent heel turn was REALLY last minute planning. Manny chops down Bob Owens and keeps him grounded with a wristlock. Hector drops a leg across his chest and connects with a Brian Blair-style stinger. Flying burrito from Manny gets the duke.

-Tony Schiavone welcomes Arn Anderson. He hasn’t missed one week of defending his title yet, and he announces that the Three Horsemen are about to become Four again. He promises that Ole WILL show up at some point during the Great American Bash, but they won’t reveal which show.

-We go to house show action pitting Ricky Morton against Ric Flair. Referee gets bumped right as Morton connects with a missile dropkick. Arn, Tully, and JJ show up and attack, and Morton gets quadruple-teamed. Flair breaks Morton’s nose with a series of kneedrops.

-Morton comes out with two black eyes and a protective device over his face. His nose is crushed, but his heart is just fine, he promises.

WAHOO MCDANIEL vs VERNON DEATON
-Wahoo takes down Vernon and chops him. “Mr. Electricity” Steve Regal is here to scout Wahoo on behalf of his good friend Jimmy Garvin. Wahoo throws a few more chops and finishes with an elbow. I have to take my hat off to Ric Flair for what that guy got out of Wahoo only eight months before this, because Wahoo is just on fumes here.

-Sandy Scott has the contract for Magnum TA’s United States Title defense against Nikita Koloff. It will be on Saturday June 7, right here on TBS. Magnum signs, and the evil Russians, who are both dressed in Don Johnson white suits, study the contract, and we have a real odd moment where Ivan talks for a while and his mouth ain’t moving. The Russians kind of tease not signing it, but then Nikita eagerly signs it and they concede that the NWA met every demand. Nikita DOES ask a completely reasonable question, though, asking Magnum TA why he brought his mother to the contract signing. Nikita says all he’s done is prove that Russian women have more class. Magnum lunges at Nikita for saying that, but he gets sickled and left laying while his mother looks horrified.

SHASKA WHATLEY (with Paul Jones) vs BILL MULKEY
-Backbreaker and a taunt combo that I call “the loogie and boogie” by Shaska while Baron Von Raschke extols the virtues of his own hand on commentary. Atomic drop by Shaska as Paul Jones taunts Jimmy Valiant for only being able to find one friend, Manny Fernandez, who’s willing to join him in a fight.

-Shaska tosses Bill Mulkey to the floor and Paul Jones makes the single most generic heel statement ever: “This man must be from this area!” Superplex by Shaska, which he should have called the Shaskaplex, gets the three-count.

-Ric Flair shows off his suit and says that Ricky Morton crossed a line into no man’s land, and that’s why he was fair game for the Horsemen. He defends the footage we saw earlier, saying that Arn and Tully were only there to congratulate him on his impending victory, and Ricky threw the first punch. Woo. He wraps up by showing some doll-sized underwear and says it’s for the girls Ricky hangs out with.

-We get more house show action. It’s supposed to be Ron Garvin against Tully in a taped fist match, but Tully shows up with his arm in a cast, and Leo Burke comes in with taped fists to take his place in the match. Tully and JJ stay at ringside while Garvin wrestles the match and renders Burke an absolutely bloody mess. JJ and Tully attempt to mount some interference, but Garvin knocks out JJ, who stumbles into Tully and knocks him off the apron. Tully comes in and goes nuts on Garvin with cast shots. Tully is pretty great on commentary as he watches it live in the studio, gloating about how Dusty and Ron Garvin kept making the case that athletic tape is completely safe. Tully finishes up the attack by piledriving Garvin on top of a chair.

-Jim Cornette is here and he has an incredibly large man in a fedora standing behind him. Hmm…

MIDNIGHT EXPRESS (World Tag Team Champions, with Jim Cornette & an unidentified large man) vs ART PRITTS & BRODIE CHASE
-Eaton suplexes Chase and comes off the top with a legdrop. Jim says that his new friend’s name is Bubba. Pritts tags in and Eaton gouges his eyes. Pritts gets dumped to the floor and Eaton helps him up…then punches him back down repeatedly. Chase comes back in and eats a missile dropkick. In comes Dennis Condrey, who chokes Chase with his boot while adjusting his gear. Dennis hits the stroke, which would normally finish, but the way the jobber takes the bump looks like shit and Dennis seems to know it, so he lets Bobby do a flying elbow and finish with that.

-Jim welcomes old family friend Bubba Rogers, who always took care of “debt collection” for Cornette’s mama. The Midnight Express needs to concentrate on preparing for title matches, so he doesn’t want them protecting him. That’s Bubba’s job. See, here’s what I find odd. I was somehow under the impression that Ray Traylor was sent away from TV for a while to grow out his hair and beard before he adopted the Bubba gimmick so he’d be unrecognizable. He didn’t do that at all and is pretty unmistakably the guy that was doing jobs a few weeks ago.

-We go to the footage that we saw earlier of the Midnight Express attacking the James Boys. They successfully unmask Frank James…but it’s jobber Tony Zane! Dusty and Magnum run in and Jim runs away in shock. Tony says this satisfactorily proves that the James Boys aren’t Dusty and Magnum, and Cornette gets totally tongue-tied while trying to explain the evil scheme that Dusty tricked them with. Baby Doll comes out and taunts Cornette, and Cornette is so flustered by everything going on around him that he finally caves in and agrees to wrestle her.

-Gorgeous Jimmy Garvin and Precious taunt that blonde nimbus cloud that we saw in the last segment, floating from man to man as usual. Garvin seems to be test-driving “It’s not my fault” as a catch phrase toward the end.

ROCK & ROLL EXPRESS vs DAVID DELLINGER AND ANOTHER JOBBER WHO EATS THE DOUBLE DROPKICK AND GETS PINNED SO FAST THAT I HADN’T TYPED HIS NAME YET WHEN THE MATCH ENDED

-Ivan and Nikita are here to warn Magnum TA not to stoop to David Crockett’s level. Good advice. Time is running out for Maggot TA.

BARON VON RASCHKE & BARBARIAN (with Paul Jones & Shaska Whatley) vs ITALIAN STALLION & ROCKY KING
-King tries to slam Barbarian but gets press-slammed like he weighs an ounce himself. Shaska comes over and cuts his usual “I’M LOUD AND I DON’LIKE JIMMAH VALIANT!” promo, and Tony deadpans “That was Shaska” when he’s done talking.

-Short clothesline by Barbarian. Big boot and some choking while Paul Jones argues with the referee on the apron for some damn reason. Right hand by Baron Von Raschke with the ominous glove, and Barbarian comes off the top rope with the flying headbutt to finish.

GREAT AMERICAN BASH UPDATE
-Tickets are on sale right now for the Best in Music and the Best in Professional Wrestling. NWA President Bob Geigel announces that Ric Flair will defend the NWA Title fourteen times in a thirty-day time span. If Flair loses the belt during any one of those matches, the winner assumes the remaining title defenses on the tour.

RON GARVIN vs KENT GLOVER
-Garvin pretzels him briefly, then headbutts him and backdrops him. Hands of stone finishes right away.

-Jim Cornette is gonna beat Baby Doll right back into the kitchen where she belongs.

7.1

The final score: review Good

The 411

Good pace to the show due to the shortened time slot, and they made the most of it. The tag team angles were a lot of fun this week.