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The Name on the Marquee: Smoky Mountain Wrestling (4.24.1993)

February 8, 2016 | Posted by Adam Nedeff
7.2
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The Name on the Marquee: Smoky Mountain Wrestling (4.24.1993)  

-Originally aired April 24, 1993.

-We’re from Barbourville, Kentucky, so I guess I was misspelling it this whole time.

-Your hosts are Bob Caudle and Dutch Mantell. Dutch does the Beat the Champ drawing and pulls out Bobby Blaze. Cool story bro: One of my college English professors dated him.

“White Lightning” TIM HORNER vs THE AVENGER
-Arm wringers are traded and Horner gets the edge with a bit of amateur wrestling. Avenger gets caught in a hammerlock, but elbows free while Bob Caudle mentions that someone has filed a lawsuit against SMW, and inexplicably, that person has been granted TV time to vent grievances after this match.

-Weird moment with the referee being waved over to the corner by the Avenger, and Avenger gives him some instructions to relay to Horner. And not only does the camera catch that, they actually go in for a close-up, as if making it a point to expose everything.

-Chinlock by the Avenger, followed by a slam. Commentators mention that the Avenger is incredibly short, but that he seems to know how to make that work to his advantage and he looks like he has potential. Avenger tries to do a leapfrog, but Horner turns it into a natural bridge for three.

-So now we come to wrestling history; Bob Caudle introduces an incredibly young, hot blonde woman in a pantsuit, who smirks smugly at the camera as Caudle says that SMW attorneys have advised him to let Ms. Tammy Fytch say whatever she wants in the following segment.

-Ms. Tammy Fytch, “of the New England Fytches, I’m sure you’ve heard of us.” Bob says that he hasn’t and she gives him a super-bitchy stinkeye for saying that. Anyway, Tammy has filed a sexual discrimination lawsuit against SMW because there are no female announcers, promoters, or managers employed by the company. And the COMMISSIONER is a guy, too! So, Tammy explains, she’s going to use the education she got at Wellesley College, (“alma mater of my idol, Hillary Rodham Clinton”) to make a change for the better in professional wrestling and become a manager, if she can find someone suitable for her. Why managing? “Big men who aren’t too bright amuse me.”

-Neat thing about the promo, by the way, was watching Tammy get “warmed up.” Her delivery for her first few lines is softcore-levels bad, but halfway through, it’s like a light bulb comes on and she’s a condescending super-bitch of epic proportions. Jim Cornette was right about Sunny, she totally hit the ground running, and you can already see she’ll be something special.

-Thought about Chris Candido: Seeing your tag-along girlfriend get a push before you CANNOT be good for your self-esteem, and could probably explain some of the seedier stories from their WWF tenure.

-We go to Knoxville for another Smoky Mountain Street Fight between the three tag teams that just can’t get along. Rock & Roll Express gets the win this time around, so at least ONE city got a happy ending. Bobby Eaton emerges after the bell to attack with a ladder, but Brian Lee emerges from the locker room to make it a fair fight. That brings out Killer Kyle and Kevin Sullivan. Lee fights off both of them as a host of guys run in, including two guys that commentator Phil Rainey doesn’t recognize.

-We get a promo for Volunteer Slam ’93: Rage in the Cage. Our main event: Brian Lee, Stud Stable, and Rock & Roll Express vs. Heavenly Bodies, Killer Kyle, Kevin Sullivan, and Tazmaniac, in a steel cage. It’s War Games, but War Games with a GREAT little twist, an alternative to the coin toss at the five-minute mark. The undercard will be the teams splitting up and wrestling each other in five one-on-one matches. The team that wins the most singles matches is the team that gets the advantage.

-Bob Armstrong and the Rock & Roll Express are here with a big announcement. On May 15 in Johnston City, TN, the Rock & Roll Express will face the Heavenly Bodies in a loser-leaves-town match. The wrestler who gets pinned must leave SMW. Heavenly Bodies and Jim Cornette come right out to protest. Cornette vows that the match ain’t happening.

-House show promo: On May 1, Rock & Roll Express and the Heavenly Bodies will meet in a loser-gets-tarred-and-feathered match. Rock & Roll Express is looking forward to May because they get to humiliate the Bodies and THEN send them packing. Tracy Smothers is sticking that Tennessee chain where the sun don’t shine, baby!

BEAT THE CHAMP TV TITLE: BEAUTIFUL BOBBY EATON (Champion, with Jim Cornette) vs BOBBY BLAZE
-Blaze’s debut. Cool Story Bro II: A friend who’s a disc jockey in Ashland, KY has a story about Blaze coming to the station to promote a local card and promising to teach him a wrestling hold, “the flying toehold.” Friend says “Okay, show me the flying toehold,” so Bobby gently steps on his foot and flaps his arms.

-Blaze outwrestles Eaton early on and Eaton looks a little surprised by how good the new guy is doing. Blaze tries to do a springboard, but Eaton holds onto him and makes it a backbreaker. Eaton goes to the top and drives a knee into Blaze’s chest to win. Blaze looked pretty good there and Eaton gets a clean win, but looks lucky at the same time.

-Bob Caudle rains on Eaton’s parade by pointing out that next week is Eaton’s fifth TV Title defense, and because of the edict from Bob Armstrong, that means that no matter what, Eaton is leaving SMW after next week. Cornette goes on an impressive run of insults about geriatric drunken washed-up over-the-hill fossil Bob Armstrong before storming off.

DIRTY WHITE BOY (with Mr. Ron Wright) vs RON CAMPIONE
-Bell sounds. DWB connects with one punch and Campione is unconscious. DWB gets the win in under ten seconds, and nobody can believe that DWB did it with one punch.

-Bob Caudle talks to DWB and Mr. Ron Wright, who has a white flag. They’re challenging Tracy Smothers to a Coward Waves the Flag match.

DOWN AND DIRTY WITH DUTCH
-Awesome botch by Dutch to start, introducing Tracy Smothers as “The Southern-Eyed White Boy.” Tracy brings his good friend Tim Horner with him, and Smothers accepts the challenge, with Tim Horner standing in his corner with the flag.

NIGHT STALKER vs “The Master” KEVIN SULLIVAN
-Sullivan clotheslines Stalker over the top, and Stalker lands on his feet and goes back in to ram him into the turnbuckle ten times. Brawl goes into the stands and Stalker waffles Sullivan with a chair and some garbage. Sullivan makes it back into the ring and Stalker slingshots himself back in and connects with a clothesline. Sullivan goes back out into the crowd and hits Stalker with a broom handle, but Stalker shakes that off and just says “In the ring!” Then he drags Kevin back to the ring and beats on him some more.

-Brawl spills out to the floor. Stalker gets rammed into the post and no-sells. Stalker misses a dropkick and finally hurts himself. Sullivan goes to work and the brawl goes out to the floor again, with Sullivan going into the post. Sullivan spews green mist into Stalker’s eyes to blind him, and the referee DQs him. That was..abrupt.

-Jim Cornette vents his frustrations about all the matches that the Bodies are being forced into.

-Kevin Sullivan promises that darkness will fall upon his opponents in the cage at Volunteer Slam. He also questions the sanity of the Rock & Roll Express agreeing to partner up with the Stud Stable, because “This isn’t the Cold War! The United States and Russia aren’t friends!” Uh…the United States and Russia weren’t friends in the Cold War, dude.

7.2
The final score: review Good
The 411
Well, they got me excited about Volunteer Slam, that's for damn sure!
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