The Name on the Marquee: WWF Championship Wrestling (5.10.1986)

-Originally aired May 10, 1986.

-Your hosts are Vince McMahon & Bruno Sammartino.

JUNKYARD DOG & GEORGE “The Animal” STEELE (with Haiti Kid) vs. TIGER CHUNG LEE & MIKE ANGELO

-Bruno says he can’t understand why Haiti Kid keeps coming to the ring with Junkyard Dog. Well, that makes two of us. I like how they needed Haiti for one angle to build the godawful boxing match, and now they’re stuck with him for whatever reason. Angelo is ENORMOUS for a jobber, about the weight of Rusty Brooks but taller than both of his opponents.

-Chunger corners Steele and Angelo hammers him in the corner. Steele bites him on the chest and beats it the hell out of there. JYD hoists Angelo and finishes quickly with the Thump. They do a comedy spot where Haiti runs back and forth across Angelo’s unconscious body, because he can, and Vince & Bruno admit between guffaws that there’s no logical reason that Angelo should be unconscious for this long.

UPDATE

-Lord Alfred Hayes overcomes he hardship of studio lights at 60% power to read the cue cards and profile relative newcomer Jake “The Snake” Roberts, whose massive python gives him a huge advantage.

HOSS & JIMMY JACK FUNK (with Jimmy Hart) vs. DAN KING & ANDRE MALO

-Hoss attacks Malo before the bell and Jimmy Jack takes full advantage before double-Funking him. Vince tells us that Jimmy Jack has spent most of his life in “The Funk House” because he was too crazy and rough for the other Funks. Now, ideally, if you’re going to put him over like that, the right way to present him is as a balls-out looney mauler who doesn’t grasp the nuances of wrestling or rules for tag team matches. Instead, Jimmy Jack is snarling heel #604-B, except he wears a Lone Ranger mask.

-Hoss and King criss-cross, with Hoss coming to a dead halt and just whapping King between the eyes. He tosses King out to the floor, where Jimmy Jack picks him up and tosses him back inside. Wow, look at this untamed wildman.

-Double underhook suplex by Hoss, and Jimmy Jack powerslams King for the win. “No wonder they kept him locked up, he’s a maniac!” marvels Bruno. Yes, only a lunatic would use the same finisher that ended the previous match.

-Gene Okerlund gets us amped up for the next Boston Garden spectacular. Davey Boy Smith, Pedro Morales, and Dan Spivey to face Brutus Beefcake, Greg Valentine, and Johnny Valiant, so the Bulldogs’ pledge to only wrestle title matches and never six-man bouts is absolutely SHOT. Gene announces that the main event will be Hulk Hogan defending the WWF Title against Randy “Macho Man” Savage. This leads quite tremendously to Gene saying that Hulk Hogan is standing by with comments about Randy Savage, and we see Hulk cutting a months-old promo in front of the old interview backdrop.

KILLER BEES vs. IRON MIKE SHARPE & JOE MIRTO

-The Bees make their first appearance wearing the masks, but they take them off before the bell.

-Sharpe gets Brunzell caught in a side headlock while Vince speculates that if the Bees ever wear their masks while wrestling, their opponents will be really confused by it.

-Blair takes a beating in the corner when Bobby Heenan drops by the commentary table, saying that he just had a meeting with his attorney and with President Jack Tunney. He demands that Andre be barred from the WWF permanently, and says that Andre has more yellow in him than the Killer Bees, who, incidentally, just powerslammed Joe Mirto and got the win without any use of the mask.

-Gene Okerlund talks to Corporal Kirchner, who taunts Nikolai Volkoff for blowing it at Wrestlemania 2 because of his own manager’s interference. They have a return match in Boston, and Kirchner promises that he’ll have somebody in his corner keeping an eye on Freddy Blassie.

RANDY “Macho Man” SAVAGE (Intercontinental Champion, with Elizabeth) vs. SERGE JODOIN

-Savage is in a foul mood after being pinned by Tito last week and spends a good chunk of time hollering back at the fans who are taunting him. Savage suplexes Jodoin as a “Macho” chant goes up, and the flying elbow ends it instantly, with Savage only needing one foot for the pin.

THE FLOWER SHOP

-Adrian’s guests are The Dream Team, finally apparently going by that name once and for all. Adrian asks for a recap of Wrestlemania 2 and Johnny blathers about screwball Lou Albano and the blatant officiating of two referees. Valentine vows to take the gold back from the Bulldogs. Not if Dynamite keeps getting injured, you’re not.

UPDATE, AGAIN

-Lord Alfred Hayes takes us to Saturday Night’s Main Event and shows us the Ricky Steamboat/Jake Roberts non-match. We go to the locker room, where Junkyard Dog, Terry Garvin & Arnold Skaaland (wearing a sport coat so red it could cure anemia) tend to the injured Steamboat.

CORPORAL KIRCHNER vs. IRON SHEIK (with Classy Freddy Blassie & Nikolai Volkoff)

-Sheik lays the humbleth down on Kirchner and backdrops him. Abdominal stretch is applied, and apparently “Gorilla duty” is a job description in pro wrestling because Vince makes it a point to explain that it’s applied wrong.

-Sheik tries another backdrop but Kirchner counters with a sunset flip for two. Kirchner tries a backdrop of his own and gets a controversial boot to the face. Double shoulderblock wipes out both men. Sheik recovers first, but Kirchner reverses his suplex and hits the fireman’s carry slam, and sure enough, here’s Nikolai for another beatdown. Killer Bees save the day.

-Gene Okerlund talks to Classy Freddy Blassie & Nikolai Volkoff. Gene wishes Blassie’s mother a happy Mother’s Day and Blassie yells at Gene for making “dastardly remarks” at her the one time that they met. Blassie accuses Kirchner of cheating by snatching the cane out of his hand at Wrestlemania 2. Randy Savage steps in, with a copy of WWF Magazine in his hands. Hulk’s on the cover, so he tosses it on the ground and promises that times are changing. Randy Savage won the Intercontinental Title in Boston, and he believes that lightning CAN strike the same spot twice.

7.0

The final score: review Good

The 411

Not as good as the rock-solid outing from last week but a pretty good follow-up, with the company waking up from its post-Wrestlemania nap and really showing some good signs of life.