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The Name on the Marquee: WWF Prime Time Wrestling (3.30.1987)

July 22, 2017 | Posted by Adam Nedeff
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The Name on the Marquee: WWF Prime Time Wrestling (3.30.1987)  

-I randomly found this episode on DailyMotion eight years ago and wrote this review at that time. Let’s revisit, shall we?…

-Originally aired March 30, 1987.

-Your hosts are Gorilla Monsoon & Bobby Heenan. Gorilla starts the show by leveling with us about the pre-taped nature of things. Since this episode was recorded before Wrestlemania III, we won’t be discussing it tonight.

OUTLAW RON BASS vs. LEAPING LANNY POFFO
-Lanny raises the bar quite a bit by rhyming “moustache” and “panache” in his poem. Lanny plays Artful Dodger to start and gets a quick shot to the torso to catch the Outlaw off-guard. Side headlock by Poffo is broken by a yank of the hair. Poffo kips up and love taps Bass. He goes back to the side headlock. Bass shoves him into the ropes, but Poffo cartwheels right over him and takes another cheap shot. Back to the side headlock. Bass shoves him into the corner and telegraphs a punch, so Poffo ducks and connects with another one of his own. Back to the side headlock as Gorilla notes that it’s important to have a body that carries extra weight in the WWF, because small guys won’t cut it. I hope no prosecuting attorneys are watching tonight.

-Arm wringer by Poffo as we enter our third minute of warming up, and Bass finally starts to show some fire with punches and a turnbuckle shot. He sends Poffo out to the floor and rams him into the post and then over the barricade. Back in the ring, it turns into a slugfest and Bass wins that battle. Forearm off the ropes by Bass and he chokes Poffo. Bass takes a few shots at the throat and chokes Poffo over the top rope. Kneelift off the ropes gets two, but Bass breaks the count. Elbow by Bass gets a two when Lanny kicks out this time. Series of punches by Poffo. Referee gets between them and Bass takes advantage with a clothesline for two.

-We take a break and return exactly where we left off. Abdominal stretch is applied to Gorilla’s dissatisfaction. Bass knocks him down to the mat and chokes again. Poffo begins throwing kicks and elbows to turn the tide. Kneelifts by Bass take Poffo right back down again. Neckbreaker by Bass, then another one for two. Bass chokes away and sends Poffo into the turnbuckle. Poffo attempts another comeback and flips himself on top of Bass for two. Another pinning combo gets two. Splash from the second rope gets two. Bass sends him back out to the floor. Poffo comes back in swinging and tries to finish with a moonsault, but only gets two. Bass goes to the eyes and sends Poffo into the ropes, meeting him on the rebound with an elbow for the three-count.

FUJI GENERAL
-An old favorite from the “TNT” archives. There’s no reason given for this, but…it’s Fuji General. You don’t need a reason.

-This is a soap opera starring Don Muraco & Mister Fuji. The segment starts off with Muraco & Fuji complaining about how bad the directing and the script were, so you know this is going to be an ugly several minutes. Dr. Muraco greets Dr. Fuji (wearing his derby along with his doctor costume) and Nurse Peacock. Muraco, who will not take his eyes off the cue cards, professes his love to Nurse Peacock, who wants nothing to do with him because of his wife. Muraco does the most wooden delivery of “I can’t stop myself,” and the director walks onto the set and tells him what a horrible actor he is. Muraco shrugs it off and re-starts the scene.

-Dr. Fuji sees somebody off-camera giving him his cue and he turns right around and demands to know what is going on. Dr. Fuji is even worse, not only reading the cue cards, but looking right into the camera as he delivers his lines and ultimately loses his place.

-They go in to check on a patient named Mr. Webster. Dr. Fuji tells Dr. Muraco that it’s a miracle that he’s still alive given that he’s been ignored. Dr. Fuji mutters something incomprehensible about Dr. Muraco’s wife and then fires Nurse Peacock. Dr. Muraco does more wooden delivery, and the director storms onto the set and screams, “Stop being a wrestler for a while and start acting!” Ahem.

-Dr. Muraco “demands” a kiss, and an argument erupts on the set until Muraco & Fuji storm off the set.

DANNY SPIVEY & JERRY ALLEN vs. DEMOLITION (with Johnny V)
-Another random partner for Spivey. The crowd is once again giving Demolition a huge star reaction. Smash and Allen start and Smash pounds Allen down and chokes him over the middle rope. He works Allen’s neck briefly and then counters a sunset flip with a punch. Elbow misses, however, and Smash gets caught in the face corner. Spivey wrings the arm but gets snapmared down. He gets backed into the Demolition corner and manages to hold his own, and applies the arm wringer again when Ax tags in. Faces switch off to work the arm. Ax backs Spivey into the ropes and punches. He tries to work the arm himself, but gets caught in a hammerlock from Spivey. Flying bodypress by Spivey gets two. Allen tags in and works the arm. Ax shoves him into Smash and Allen gets double-teamed. Smash sends him out to the floor, where Ax is waiting to send him into the post. We take a break…

-And come back to Ax applying a headlock on Allen. Demolition trades off to work the neck. Allen tries to mount a comeback by trading fists, but Smash stops him and Allen gets double-teamed. Ax sends him to the floor, where Johnny V and Smash go to work on him. Back in the ring, Allen counters a backdrop with a kick and makes the hot tag, and Spivey takes care of Ax & Smash. Clothesline nearly finishes Ax, but Smash makes the save. Spivey gets knocked out of the ring and he tags Allen on the way. Allen walks right into a clothesline and Ax picks up the win.

-Gene Okerlund, not having read the memo about being honest with the viewers this week, talks about how Wrestlemania III is history and brings in Blackjack Mulligan, who has words for Outlaw Ron Bass.

THE FINAL PIPER’S PIT
-Piper cuts a really moving promo about how he didn’t want to quit wrestling when he got stabbed & shot at by a crazed fan, but his daughter cried the last time he left for a match, and suddenly he didn’t want to wrestle anymore. He thanks the fans for their support, then pulls out his gun and picks off the one-armed man. Piper then looks down at the floor, where he sees that his friend BJ has spelled out “GOODBYE” in stones. Suddenly, Janitor walks out and reveals that his real name is Glen Matthews, and in a shocking twist, we discover that the Piper’s Pit set is inside a snow globe, and every segment was a figment of George “The Animal” Steele’s imagination. Saw it coming.

-Bobby “The Moment Killer” Heenan says that Piper screwed up the story. His daughter actually wanted him to go on the road more so she could play with her toys by herself for once.

-Honky Tonk Man lays down some tracks at Phillips Recording in Memphis.

SIVI AFI vs. RED DEMON
-Ah yes, the traditional “throw the jobbers a bone” segment of Prime Time. Demon goes right on the offensive until getting chopped and splashed by Afi. Dropkick sends Demon out to the floor. Back in the ring, Afi shoulderblocks Demon and slams him down. Splash is countered by raised knees. Demon unwraps his wrist tape and chokes Afi with it. Afi breaks free with an elbow but gets cut right off from his comeback attempt and Demon goes back to choking. Afi elbows free again and hits a double chop off the ropes. Crescent kick and a series of chops by Afi take down the Demon. Headbutt from the second turnbuckle gets two. Afi rams Demon into the turnbuckle. Demon reverses an Irish whip but misses a charge and gets powerslammed. Flying bodypress from the top rope gives Afi the win. Surprisingly good, considering it barely went four minutes.

JAKE “The Snake” ROBERTS vs. KING KONG BUNDY (with Bobby Heenan)
-Copy-pasted from Saturday Night’s Main Event. Snake tries an arm wringer, but Bundy swats him off. Bundy gets a little too close to Damien’s bag and backs away. Bundy attempts a clothesline, but Jake holds onto the ropes and makes him look a little foolish. Lock-up and Bundy wrings the arm. Jake gets him to let go by kicking the legs. Jake tries a test of strength and Jesse doesn’t know what the hell he’s thinking. Bundy takes him down to the mat, but Jake kicks him away. Bundy pounds him down and sends him into the turnbuckle. Front facelock by Bundy and Jake won’t die, so Bundy tries a backdrop. Jake counters it with a kneelift and a series of right hands that drops Bundy. Jake goes for Damien, but Bundy pulls him away and Heenan takes off with Damien’s bag. Jake chases him back to the locker room, and we’ll be right back.

-Jake returns with the bag, but Bobby Heenan is now MIA. Bundy assaults Jake on his way back into the ring and clotheslines him down. Shoulderblock by Bundy. Bundy tries another shoulderblock, but Jake steps aside and shoves him into the turnbuckles. Jake gets to his feet and throws more punches. Clothesline drops Bundy and Jake goes to the bag. The referee tries to stop him, but Jake kicks him for some reason and the referee calls for the DQ. The brawl continues post-match, with Jake coming out on top with the DDT. Bobby Heenan returns and miraculously drags Bundy’s carcass out of the ring before Damien could do his thing. Inexplicable finish to this one, following a rather so-so punch & kick battle.

BLACKJACK MULLIGAN & DANNY SPIVEY vs. TIGER CHUNG LEE & SALVATORE BELLOMO
-Double-duty and another new partner for Spivey. Gorilla bills this as tag team action involving Lee & Bellomo, without mentioning their opponents. That’s an interesting choice.

-Jobbers attack during the entrance and get Irish whipped into each other for their trouble. Double clothesline on Bellomo and he puts up his dukes for fisticuffsmanship. Mulligan hiptosses him and follows with an elbow. Bellomo goes face-first into Spivey’s boot and Lee tags in to do his part. Mulligan backdrops him. Lee throws chops and gets double-teamed in the corner, but a noggin-knocker takes care of that. Bellomo gets trapped in the face corner and Spivey attacks him from the apron. Mulligan tags him in and Spivey keeps control with a shoulderblock and a bodyslam. Lee tags and walks into a side headlock. Spivey releases and whiffs on a dropkick that Lee doesn’t even bother selling. Faces switch off on Lee. Spivey gets Windhamized on a leapfrog attempt and Mulligan finishes Lee off very shortly after with an elbow.

-Gene Okerlund talks to Outback Jack about his catchy theme music.

BRITISH BULLDOGS vs. DEMOLITION (with Johnny V)
-Matilda attacks Johnny V before the bell, then turns right around to the broadcast table and stares at Jimmy Hart, which is pretty neat. Demolition attacks from behind and Ax pounds down Dynamite, then puts the boots to him. Smash (who looks ‘roided right up to his eyeballs here) tags in and applies an awful-looking chinlock. Ax tags in and locks in a bearhug. They get to the ropes and Johnny V takes a cheap shot as Smash tags in. Smash applies his own bearhug. Demolition takes advantage of a moment of distraction to double-team Dynamite, and Smash locks in our third bearhug of the bout. Dynamite headbutts free and tags in Davey Boy. Dropkicks and running powerslams for everybody. Noggin knocker sends Ax out of the ring. Johnny V hooks his leg from the outside, which upsets Davey Boy, so Dynamite lobs a chair into the ring and Davey Boy clears the ring with it, getting himself disqualified. Feh.

5.0
The final score: review Not So Good
The 411
Ehhhh, nah. Give the win to the NWA this week.
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