wrestling / Columns

The Magnificent Seven: The Top 7 Bobby Heenan Rivalries

December 28, 2014 | Posted by Mike Chin

Wrestling fans have divergent opinions. Was Hulk Hogan the greatest showman in wrestling history or an overrated politician who dumb-lucked his way into connecting with an audience? Is Randy Orton the best in-ring performer in WWE today or a complete snore?

Wrestling fans don’t agree on much, but one of the few points that very few of us will argue about is the greatness of Bobby Heenan as a manager and commentator (or “broadcast journalist” as he would have said). As a mouthpiece for the heels of a generation, Heenan was more or less without peer. Most folks agree he was the greatest; no one denies that he belongs in the conversation.

Heenan was great for getting people over, and more often than not he did so by participating in epic rivalries. As Heenan has famously described, he wrestled like a manager, and managed like a wrestler, never hesitating to get physically involved, more often than not to his own embarrassment. Similarly, he wove spectacular webs of deceit and good humor from the broadcast table—only to, as often as not, end up tripping over himself and playing the classic fool.

This week, I’m looking back at the top seven Bobby Heenan rivalries.

Which Bobby Heenan rivalries were your favorites? Let us know in the comments section. See you in seven.

#7. The Ultimate Warrior

Along The Ultimate Warrior’s ascent to the top of the WWF, he had his share of confrontations with Heenan Family members, from Hercules to Andre the Giant to Rick Rude. As Heenan did for so many upper tier faces, he offered Warrior’s progression a sense of continuity, not just moving from random bad guy to random bad guy, but rather providing a sequence of foes to overcome. While it wasn’t his most significant wrestling challenge, Warrior also bolstered his name value by squaring off against Heenan himself in a series of weasel suit matches—far from mat classics, but memorable bits of comedy and a vaunted heel getting his comeuppance.

#6. Roddy Piper

In the late eighties and early nineties, Roddy Piper was a near-perfect foil for Bobby Heenan because, unlike so many of The Brain’s foes who had only their fists to answer Heenan’s challenges, Piper could hold his own on the mic as well, getting into heated bickering matches on the set of Prime Time Wrestling and in backstage vignettes to set up an in-ring feud between Piper and one of Heenan’s star charges, Rick Rude. The storyline helped solidify Rude’s place in the upper mid-card and succeeded in striking a balance for WWF during that era—a feud with a silly, cartoonish backdrop (the blow-off saw Piper and Rude compete in a match with the stipulation that Heenan would have to dress up like Santa Claus if Piper won) that at the same time delivered a good wrestling match in its own right.

#5. Andre the Giant

Contemporary fans are as likely to remember Andre the Giant’s iconic heel run as the decades longer that he spent as a face prior to that period. But just as an inextricable as Bobby Heenan was as the Giant’s manager as a bad guy, he was a thorn in the big guy’s side for years as a good guy, backing Big John Studd and later King Kong Bundy as super heavyweight rivals to Andre. The program included a year-long build to a bodyslam match between Andre and Studd at the first WrestleMania which saw Andre relieve Heenan of $15,000 which he generously shared with the crowd at Madison Square Garden. In the year to follow, Andre was farcically suspended from the WWF and returned under a mask as The Giant Machine to continue battling Heenan’s charges. Not long after, Andre would turn heel would and partner with Heenan but even at the end of that run, he found himself at odds with “The Brain” again—after dropping the tag titles, Heenan berated Andre in the ring at WrestleMania 6, which led to Andre physically disposing of both Heenan and his (suddenly former) partner, Haku. Though Andre would essentially retire after that point, his next WWF appearance came a year later—showing up at WrestleMania 7 to back The Big Bossman against Mr. Perfect and, more importantly, to mess with Heenan one last time.

Andre was a rival too big for Heenan to ever truly overcome, and that he could only subdue for a period of time when he partnered with the big guy.

#4. Mr. Perfect

Like Andre the Giant, Mr. Perfect’s alliance with Bobby Heenan is probably more famous than his rivalry. I’d contend that both were very, very good, though.

Heenan was Perfect’s middle, and most memorable manager—after The Genius and before Coach. Later, when Perfect’s injuredback put him out of action, he reteamed with Heenan as a comedic duo on Prime Time Wrestling and as members of newly arrived Ric Flair’s entourage. Things took a turn, though, when Randy Savage invited Perfect to join him in challenging Flair and Razor Ramon at Survivor Series 1992. The offer seemed absurd—why would Perfect go against his own buddy?—but turned out to be a masterstroke of crash booking (The Ultimate Warrior was supposed to team with Savage but left at the last minute due to a contract dispute), when Heenan laughed at the idea of Perfect teaming with Savage and Perfect took exception—he turned face and returned to the ring not to “do the right thing” or because he had been beaten down, but perhaps for the most bizarro-Heenan reason possible—to defend his pride and settle a petty difference. The Heenan-Perfect rivalry wasn’t particularly long, but was successful, seeing not just the Survivor Series tag match but an epic early Raw loser leaves town match between Perfect and Flair, and later Heenan backing another newly arrived superstar, Lex Luger, against Perfect heading into WrestleMania 9.

It may have been difficult to accept Perfect as a face—particularly for how little his character changed—but warring with Heenan and his guys was just the ticket to get over the new spin on the old character.

#3. The Big Boss Man

Bobby Heenan nicknamed himself The Brain and, accordingly, played a snide character who prided himself on his master scheming and quick wit. As such, The Big Boss Man posed a fitting opponent—a rough and tumble, straight forward, good old boy who specialized in brawling offense. It was a classic clash between an evil mastermind and a good-hearted everyman, spurred on by Heenan’s insistence on making fun of Boss Man’s mother.

It’s telling of a declining empire that Heenan, who had once threatened Hulk Hogan, Andre the Giant, Randy Savage, and The Ultimate Warrior, was now relegated to feuding with a decidedly upper mid-card act like The Big Boss Man, and all the more telling that Boss Man got the better of every exchange, fighting his way through Heenan’s entire roster of baddies until he got to Mr. Perfect at WrestleMania 7—another match Boss Man won, albeit via DQ so he wouldn’t relieve Perfect of the Intercontinental Championship. Regardless, The Boss Man put Heenan in his place as good faces were wont to do, and there was something particularly gratifying about him doing so when Heenan had targeted him and his family not in pursuit of a championship or because of any real slight, but rather just to be a jerk.

#2. Gorilla Monsoon

One could argue that Bobby Heenan and Gorilla Monsoon feuded from afar, when Monsoon settled into the role of commentator and Heenan as manager, and Monsoon consistently lampooned Heenan and his stable of villains for their nefarious ways. The feud grew more fully realized when the two shared studio time on Prime Time Wrestling, as well as the broadcasters’ table and engaged in consistent verbal sparring. Monsoon was in no shape by then to engage in physical confrontation and Heenan’s work as a wrestler was purely for comedy relief and the gratification of seeing a heel weasel get his due beating, thus the two would, fittingly, never blow off their feud with an in-ring encounter. Years of comedically golden animosity would come fruition, though, at the dawn of Monday Night Raw. An early episode saw Monsoon, fed up with Heenan’s insults, storming the ringside area, grabbing Heenan and physically tossing him out the arena door—a far more satisfying resolution than the belabored Jerry Lawler-Michael Cole commentator feud that would follow it, appropriately silly, and a watershed moment as the Hogan era of WWF had really passed and the New Generation took hold.

#1. Hulk Hogan

Bobby Heenan was the definitive heel manager of his era. Sure, Mr. Fuji, Jimmy Hart, and Slick were in his cohort, and each had their moments to shine but from his arrival in the WWF (and arguably as far back as his time backing Nick Bockwinkel and company in AWA) there was no question that Heenan was the top dog when it came to serving as a mouthpiece, interfering party, and heat gatherer for the heels of his day.

As such, its fitting that Heenan’s greatest rival would be the greatest hero of the day. Hulk Hogan was everything Heenan wasn’t. Strong, brave, and ethical. A man who let his wrestling do the talking and stood for himself, rather than hiding behind hired muscle. The model of having a heel manager submit a series of challengers to a face is not exactly new, and even Hogan himself experienced it at different points in his career, but never was the dynamic more perfect than in the form of heel mastermind Heenan rallying the era’s top big men—Big John Studd, King Kong Bundy, and Andre the Giant—to try to knock off The Immortal.

What were your favorite Bobby Heenan rivals? Terry Taylor? Brian Pillman? The British Bulldogs? Let us know in the comments section.

Read stories and miscellaneous criticism from Mike Chin at his website and his thoughts on a cappella music at The A Cappella Blog. Follow him on Twitter @miketchin.