The Wrestling News Experience: 10.29.12
Monday, October 29th, 2012
From 411Mania’s Canadian offices in Kitchener, Ontario, Canada, this is The Wrestling News Experience, with Stephen Randle!
Stand Back! There’s A Hurricane Coming Through!
Good morning, everyone, and welcome to the Experience. I’m Stephen Randle, and in my seemingly weekly quest to find even more TV to watch, I’ve recently discovered The League. Which, unsurprisingly, is awesome. If I had one complaint, it would be this: could someone tell FX that it’s okay for TV shows to have more than 13-episode seasons? Seriously, it’s bad enough when I have to wait eight months between Game of Thrones seasons, now I have to do it for Justified and The League too? At least they don’t all air at the same time, I guess.
Here’s hoping none of my readers get blown away by the incoming hurricane. I can’t really afford to lose any.
Slimmer had our live coverage. I gave up my usual TV watching to record live running commentary for you.
I will give them credit for listening to me about unique PPV entrances, because while there are a whole bunch of video screens, at least they incorporated a little fire into the set.
Aw, Orton shaved his head again. I guess he’s done filming 12 Rounds 2: 24 Rounds.
Who, exactly, is calling Del Rio’s cross-armbreaker the most dangerous submission in WWE? Byers? Are you trolling in the 8-Ball again?
Apparently the majority of Superstars polled think Del Rio is going to win. So what you’re saying is, WWE conducts its polls at the bar at roughly 1 am.
Wow, either Del Rio forgot what he went up top to do or Orton forgot that he was supposed to hit Del Rio on the way down. That was hilarious in how sad it was. I’m shocked Orton didn’t just start yelling “stupid” and have Del Rio’s push killed, but sadly we’re a year and half too late for that anyway.
Randy Orton defeated Alberto Del Rio (pinfall, RKO)
Apparently there was a YouTube pre-show, although they didn’t promote it and I don’t think there was a match. So, that’s four months before they stopped caring, who had that in the pool?
Oh good, let’s talk more about AJ and Vickie Guerrero, and use it to promote something that won’t happen until tomorrow night’s Raw! Because that’s what people paid to see!
Bwaha, Cole gets lost as JBL and JR list off great WCW-based tag teams and doesn’t recognize Doom. His defense? “Well, I only started working here in 1997”.
I’ll be damned, it’s a tag match that’s getting enough time to actually have extended heat segments from both teams, instead of just trading moves for three minutes until the hot tag and the finish!
Sounds like the Elbow of Disdain is over, somehow.
Well, that was a finish I didn’t predict.
Rhodes Scholars defeated Hell No by DQ when Kane went nuts. Hell No retain the Tag Team Championships
I actually don’t mind the DQ finish because Rhodes Scholars shouldn’t win the titles on their first shot, especially since there’s still lots of life in Kane and Bryan tagging, so this is an easy way to get a rematch. Plus it was a good match before the DQ.
Did I just see an ad for National Geographic Channel on a WWE PPV?
How to tell when Kofi’s getting another serious push: he’s got a new shirt.
JBL says he’s a huge fan of The Miz. That’s not the way he tells it.
Man, without all the padding, Kofi’s got really skinny legs.
Kofi Kingston defeated The Miz to retain the Intercontinental Championship (pinfall, Trouble In Paradise)
I wonder if Miz feels stupid for spending the entire match working on the leg that Kofi doesn’t use for his finisher.
Yes, I know it’s a wrestling convention, it’s still relevant.
Ah, nothing like watching a South African challenge a Swiss for the United States title that was previously held by a Canadian pretending to be Italian. You never get this with the IC title.
I should mention at this point that the Atlanta crowd is so dead that this PPV should be airing on AMC right now. Maybe they’re having WCW flashbacks. The number of people who were emotionally scarred by WCW is staggering, you know. They’ve done studies.
Antonio Cesaro defeated Justin Gabriel to retain the United States Championship (pinfall, Neutralizer)
Good run of matches so far tonight. Which means we must be due for a Divas match next.
Oh, that’s right, there’s an actual tag division now.
Why do I feel like we’re just killing time until the main event at this point?
Also, the good match streak is going down, mostly because Titus and Darren just aren’t interesting workers and they’re getting all the offense. I know I talked earlier about heat segments and why they’re great, but the PTP just don’t have the skill level to make beating the crap out of Sin Cara interesting. I will admit that it’s not all their fault, the crowd just could not give less of a shit about the show so far. It’s hard to generate heat when they only pop for entrances and finishes.
Actually, they’re into Rey’s hot tag sequence. Maybe he should have been the victim of the heat segment, the crowd sounds like they might have cared.
Sin Cara and Rey Mysterio defeated The Prime Time Players (Rey pinned Young, 619/Drop The Dime)
Oh crap, Sin Cara couldn’t tuck his head on a suplex spot and that’s gotta be a mild concussion at least. Ouch.
They’re telegraphing Dolph cashing in wayyyyy too much, which, since this is wrestling, means it probably won’t happen. At least it had better not, because it will destroy my pick ‘ems.
Dear lord, this match is still going.
Well, at least the finishing part is creating some tension.
The Big Show defeated Sheamus to win the World Heavyweight Championship (pinfall, KO Punch)
No way Ziggler cashes here, Show isn’t nearly beat up enough to make it successful. Which begs the new question: why the hell did they put the title on Big Show?
Hah, they go for the “leave the cameras on Sheamus for crowd reaction” shot and get nothing. Atlanta sucks!
Well, that Swanton hit absolutely nothing.
Eve defeated Layla and Kaitlyn to retain the Divas Championship (Eve pinned Layla, alleged Swanton)
Oh come on, they had six weeks between Night of Champions and Hell in a Cell, and only three between Hell in a Cell and Survivor Series? Who had that particular scheduling brainfart?
You have to be kidding me. That’s the best plan they could come up with?
CM Punk defeated Ryback to retain the WWE Championship (pinfall, crooked referee)
Well, that accomplished nothing and took a crazy path getting there. You know, if you’re too chickenshit to book an actual ending to your Hell in a Cell WWE Title match because you booked yourself in a corner by putting your undefeated guy against a guy who has to face the Rock at the Royal Rumble for the title, maybe you just SHOULDN’T BOOK THAT SHIT IN THE FIRST PLACE! So, Ryback’s no longer undefeated, the match sucked because they gave it no time and half of it was Punk running away, but hey, at least there’s a crooked referee who doesn’t wrestle and won’t be remembered after this week. Nobody gets over!
I wonder if it’s intentional that it’s the same referee who missed Punk’s foot on the ropes a few weeks back? Tune into Nitro…I mean Raw…to find out!
Man, was it ever appropriate that this show emanated from the former home of WCW. Decent undercard, bad main events.
But hey, at least we got a shot of Ryback hitting Shellshock on top of the Cell. Which isn’t actually horribly impressive other than it required Ryback to climb the Cell.
Last night, CM Punk escaped from his Hell in a Cell match with Ryback, defeating the previously unbeaten monster through the use of an apparently crooked referee. Will Punk and Heyman explain just exactly what the hell was going on last night on Raw tonight? One would certainly hope so.
Meanwhile, there’s a new World Heavyweight Champion, and it’s the gigantic Big Show. Having lasted long enough to not be another 45-second title reign, it will be difficult indeed for anyone to take on the wary and angry giant straight up. And what of Dolph Ziggler’s guarantee that he would cash in last night? I guess in his world “guarantee” means “get beat up by John Cena in the pre-show and show up in a quick shot staring at a TV backstage during the World title match”.
And Team Hell No held on to their Tag Team titles, but couldn’t actually score a win over Rhodes Scholars, as Kane ran amuck and was DQ’d for excessive force. One would imagine that Rhodes and Sandow will use some mighty big words tonight as they demand a rematch in some form.
Oh yeah, I suppose John Cena will be around, too. But it seems like he’s been sidetracked by Vickie Guerrero, who claims to have proof that Cena is fooling around with AJ. I know, you’re all waiting with bated breath to find out who’s telling the truth, aren’t you? No? Well, they’re going to tell you anyway.
Plus, Kofi Kingston defeated The Miz last night, and with that rematch handled, must now seek new challengers. And with Survivor Series only three (three!?) weeks away, we’ll need some matches quickly, and maybe even one of those classic elimination dealies! All this and more, tonight on Raw!
Aces And Eighteen Months Or So
A common complaint in today’s WWE, with seven hours of first-run TV every week and a PPV every month, is that storylines and feuds get run through too quickly. Well, apparently there’s word going out that TNA has plans for the current Aces and Eights storyline to run for the next six months. Well, it has been four (four!?) months since they debuted with an attack on Sting and we only learned who the Sergeant-at-Arms was two weeks ago, so six months actually might be speeding things up. If nothing else, it’s definitely more time than any Russo booking ever dedicated to a feud.
The problem is, absolutely nothing is happening in this feud. In the four months since it started, Aces and Eights has beat up a bunch of people. Then the TNA roster has beat up a bunch of guys from Aces and Eights, although since they’re all in masks we have no idea who they are. Austin Aries wrestled a guy at No Surrender, but again, we don’t know who it was, and the match ended when Aces and Eights ran in. Then, at Bound For Glory, Devon was revealed. That’s the entire storyline progression. The whole “banning them from the building” thing was initially interesting, but banning them from the building just meant that absolutely nothing happened for an entire month because they weren’t physically present. So, in four months, we’ve learned that…Devon is a member of Aces and Eights. That’s all. It’s kind of hard to have an interesting feud when of roughly a dozen guys, we only just now learned of one member who we might recognize. And if you believe what’s going around, the next guy to be revealed will probably be Garrett Bischoff. Not exactly a stable to make you pee your pants at, is it?
A while back I was asked if it’s unfair to compare this stable to the nWo. Well, it is, because this is in no way the nWo. We knew who they were from the start. When they ran in during matches and beat down half the roster, at least we knew who to boo. They feuded with other wrestlers in matches that could be promoted with more than just “random nWo members will fight these guys”. The mystery of Aces and Eights was one that needed to be revealed after suitable build, and that time was a couple weeks ago at Bound For Glory. They can’t stay faceless forever, because that angle doesn’t go anywhere.
But hey, they’ve got at least six months of storyline planned. Maybe by then we can find out a whole three member identities. Possibly four, if they have a tag team.
Well, I guess he’s technically the uncrowned champion, since it’s pretty obvious that he was going to win the match and the title. If I were the sort of person who deals in technicalities.
Like he said, at least now people can stop talking about 45 second title reigns. What is it with guys using really short spans of time to get more over? First Bryan, now this.
Well, at the very least they’ve booked a division with more than one credible team, even if we know that Hell No has an expiry date in the near future. The obvious question is, given how easy having tag teams makes providing filler matches for PPVs, why haven’t they done this long before now? Look how easy it was to get six top stars (and the PTP) on the PPV in two matches!
I don’t think we’ll ever get more of an official face turn than Bully’s pretty darned good promo on Thursday. The minute you accuse someone of saying “screw the fans, we’re rich”, you’re a good guy. Now, when he finally does turn on Sting, nobody will see it coming!
I’m just kidding. Mostly.
Along with Cesaro, Kofi is one of those midcard guys WWE actually doesn’t seem to mind booking strong when he’s holding the belt, so for the first time in a very, very long time, we could be looking at the start of a functional and competitive midcard again. Hey, they rebuilt the tag division, anything is possible.
A well-oiled machine in the ring until they weren’t, more of this feud with Rhodes Scholars is an immediate necessity, and it looks like we’re going to get it, too.
Is it so wrong to hope that Aries wins at Turning Point just so they can have the regular TNA Title again? I know replica belts make money, but who in the hell would ever buy that thing Jeff carries over his shoulder?
Joe immediately removes the Robbies from the picture, which begs the question, who else is left in that division?
Cesaro continues to be dominant, even if they had to pretend that Justin Gabriel was an actual contender for a week to get him a PPV match with any build at all. I’m not against doing that sort of thing, because Gabriel can at least bring the goods, even if there’s not much to his character.
Why do I worry that we’re looking at Show’s next challenger?
Inactive List as of 10.15.12
– Alex Riley, out indefinitely as of September 20th (knee and elbow surgeries)
– Evan Bourne, out indefinitely as of March 19th (foot)
– Christian, out indefinitely as of September 1st (elbow)
– Curt Hawkins, out indefinitely as of October 8th (multiple surgeries)
– Mark Henry, out indefinitely as of May 1st (surgery)
– The Great Khali, out until November as of July 24th (surgery)
– Bray Wyatt, out six months as of July 4th (torn pectoral)
– Skyler Moon, out indefinitely as of September 27 (rehab)
– Chris Sabin, out 6-9 months as of June 14th (ACL)
– Jesse Sorenson, out at least one year as of February 12th (spine)
– Mickie James, out indefinitely as of October 16th (surgery)
– The Pope, out 2-3 months as of August 12th (broken collarbone)
– Lilian Garcia, SD!, out indefinitely as of October 27th (hit by car)
WWE Champion: CM Punk
– 344 day reign, defeated Alberto Del Rio on November 20th (Survivor Series PPV)
**NEW** World Heavyweight Champion: The Big Show
– 1 day reign, defeated Sheamus on October 28th (Hell in a Cell PPV)
WWE Intercontinental Champion: Kofi Kingston
– 12 day reign, defeated The Miz on October 17th (WWE Main Event)
WWE United States Champion: Antonio Cesaro
– 71 day reign, defeated Santino Marella on August 19th (SummerSlam PPV)
WWE Tag Team Champions: Kane and Daniel Bryan
– 43 day reign, defeated Kofi Kingston and R-Truth on September 16th (Night of Champions PPV)
WWE Divas’ Champion: Eve Torres
– 43 day reign, defeated Layla on September 16th (Night of Champions PPV)
WWE NXT Champion: Seth Rollins
– 61 day reign, defeated Jinder Mahal to become the inaugural Champion
TNA Heavyweight Champion: Jeff Hardy
– 15 day reign, defeated Austin Aries on October 14th (Bound For Glory PPV)
– Next title defense: vs Austin Aries, Turning Point PPV
TNA World Tag Team Champions: Chavo Guerrero and Hernandez
– 15 day reign, defeated former champions Daniels & Kazarian, and AJ Styles & Kurt Angle in a Triple Threat match on October 14th (Bound For Glory PPV)
TNA X-Division Champion: RVD
– 15 day reign, defeated Zema Ion to on October 14th (Bound For Glory PPV)
TNA Television Champion: Samoa Joe
– 32 day reign, defeated Mr. Anderson on September 27th Impact to win the vacant title
TNA Knockouts Champion: Tara
– 15 day reign, defeated Miss Tessmacher on October 14th (Bound For Glory PPV)
TNA Knockouts Tag Team Champions: ODB and Eric Young
– 235 day reign, defeated Gail Kim and Madison Rayne on March 8th (Impact)
Acero has The Wrestling 5&1.
Norton has a 411-exclusive interview with Dolph Ziggler.
Sarnecky has The Piledriver Report.
Byers has The 8-Ball.
And the newest episode of TWNE After Dark looks at the idiocy of the Raw GM angle, how I would have finished Punk vs Ryback, and whether Brock Lesnar could possibly work more dates if he signs on to WWE for another year! Click the banner!
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Here it is, your Moment of Buddy
Yes, Buddy Sleeps Sitting Up.
When He Tries To Figure Out How He Does It
He Falls Over.
Have a good one, and always be a fan.