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Work in PROGRESS: PROGRESS Chapter 25 – Chat Shit Get Banged

January 15, 2017 | Posted by Jake St-Pierre
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Work in PROGRESS: PROGRESS Chapter 25 – Chat Shit Get Banged  

Hey pals. I have a neat wrestling Twitter that you can see at www.twitter.com/JakeStPierre411. Most wrestling writers’ Twitter accounts are cancer because everybody wants to be an “insider” now, but luckily for you, I don’t know anyone in the wrestling business aside from that time Michael Elgin retweeted a review of mine because the teaser said he was the Wrestler of the Year. So give me a follow and have a real good day.

While it did feature one of the worst matches of 2015 in Ashmore vs. Smith, PROGRESS’s debut in Manchester was a massive success on the quality end of things. So much so that it might be one of the best PROGRESS shows I’ve seen in my run so far. We had a tremendous triple threat main event, some beautiful violence in London Riots vs. SDS, and one of PROGRESS’s best matches ever in Zack Sabre Jr vs. Tommaso Ciampa, leaving PROGRESS’s groundbreaking 2015 behind in exciting fashion. We return to the Electric Ballroom for the first event of 2016, with Marty Scurll finally getting a PROGRESS Title shot after a groundbreaking year of his own. Given Scurll’s banner year in 2016, it’s only right that we begin with one of the best matches of the year on paper, right?

We are TAPED from the Electric Ballroom in London, England.

Your hosts are Glen Joseph & RJ Singh.

As ever, we begin with co-owner Jim Smallman in the ring, pimping a Periscope broadcast and the fact that he was finally able to get a show titled “Chat Shit Get Banged” after expressing his disappointment at not being able to do so at Chapter 23. There’s also a spiffy new PROGRESS canvas again, replacing the one Jimmy Havoc and Paul Robinson tore up at Chapter 21.

PROGRESS Tag Titles: The Origin © vs. F.S.U.
I’d say The Origin had a pretty decent Chapter 24 all things considered, with Zack Gibson actually being one of the more entertaining parts of the the triple threat main event while the other members were reined into the undercard in a fun little trios match. FSU were a part of that trios match as it goes and since Eddie Dennis beat Dave Mastiff at an ENDVR show, so here we are for a title match. Seems simple enough.

The PROGRESS sings “shit El Torito” at El Ligero, which could make even the coldest man’s heart melt a little bit. Cruz and Andrews start the match, and Andrews is able to flip out of a slingshot back suplex and get the upper hand early on. Eddie Dennis and El Ligero meet soon after, and it doesn’t go much better for the luchador. Of course, The Origin’s cheap antics are able to curb that with relative ease. El Ligero’s cockiness turns out to be his undoing, and a desperate Eddie Dennis is finally able to get to Mandrews, who has quite a spicy hot tag. El Ligero stops a Shooting Star by grabbing Andrews’ legs, letting Nathan Cruz recover long enough to dropkick Andrews out of mid-air. Eddie comes back in to help his partner, and he tries the Michael Elgin Samoan Drop/Fallaway Slam to The Origin, who both break out… only to get thrown across the ring with a double suplex! Cruz escapes a Next Stop Driver, and backs Dennis into the turnbuckles, crotching Andrews who eventually recovers and sends both of the Origin to the outside with a double missile dropkick! Andrews tries to follow up, but Ligero and Cruz freefall drop him on the apron… only for Eddie to come out with a BIG Tope Con Hilo! Dennis NECKS Ligero with a Gunn Slinger that sends him reeling out of the ring. Cruz eats a Razor’s Edge/Enzuigiri into the corner from FSU, but El Ligero slinks back in and drops Eddie with a springboard DDT… only to run into a diving crossbody from Andrews! Cruz and Andrews fight it out until Cruz sandbags a reverse rana, passing Andrews off to El Ligero for a Tombstone Lungblower, followed by a nifty double team DDT/Wheelbarrow Suplex for 2! Andrews kicks out! Andrews nearly wins the Shields with a schoolboy, but Cruz kicks out at the last millisecond. NEXT STOP DRIVER FROM FSU! EL LIGERO PULLS THE REF OUT! El Ligero posts Eddie Dennis and slides in a Tag Shield, and Nathan Cruz TOMBSTONES Andrews on it to pick up the win in 13 minutes. *** This is the sort of stuff you’d want to see from an opener. It doesn’t make you think too much, but it also provides very quick, tight action and gets the crowd going enough to introduce the show properly. You had a great heel/babyface dynamic with the champs and challengers respectively, and they brought it all together with a tag match that never really had much resembling a slow moment. This is the kind of thing I want to see The Origin do going forward, as the cheating finish was after a good match, and just fine given that they knew had they continued to play it straight, they’d have lost the titles. It’s not cheating for cheating’s sake, and it’s nice to see heels be heels for an actual storyline reason. Quite the success in that sense.

Natural Progression Series Quarterfinal: Tyler Bate vs. Damian Dunne
Last time we saw Tyler Bate was against Pastor William Eaver at Chapter 22, and while he’s a much more significant part of PROGRESS in the current day, he was only doing this “Second Chance” match here. We haven’t seen Damian Dunne on the main shows since his match with The GZRs’ Sebastian (whose withdrawal from the NPS caused this match) all the way back at Chapter 20, and that match really didn’t give me much of an idea on what he had to offer.

Bate quickly shows his technical skill, wrestling a clinic on Dunne in the earlygoing before going after his fingers. Bate breaks a headlock by grabbing his own foot and whacking Dunne with it in a cute spot. Damian threatens to take over, but Bate fires back with a nifty double jump twisting uppercut for 2. He locks in an abdominal stretch that mostly looks like a standing Twister, transitioned right into an Octopus Stretch, transitioning from there into a sunset flip for 2! They trade strikes in the middle of the ring until Bate STARCHES Damian Dunne with a headbutt! AIRPLANE SPIN with a switch of directions in the middle! DIVING HEADBUTT ALL THE WAY ACROSS THE RING! Dunne is able to kick out. Dunne stiffs Bate with a disgusting superkick, followed by a flying knee for two! A springboard lungblower gets Damian Dunne the win in 10 minutes, much to the chagrin of the crowd. *** Damian Dunne came off okay here, but you could really tell from the beginning of this match that Tyler Bate is on a totally different level when it comes to having an obvious connection to the crowd. His facial expressions, personality, and overall crispness to his work really puts into perspective that Dunne is probably a bit too generic to put over a guy like Bate, who impressed me a lot in a short window of time and could have provided this Natural Progression Series with a bit more in the way of pizzazz. That being said, this was a wonderfully entertaining match for the time it got. It was smooth and exciting without being too chaotic, as Bate and Dunne got their shit in comfortably and weren’t rushing to blow their load too much. This is one of those undercard matches that you won’t remember in a month, but in terms of helping the flow of a show, matches like these are greatly appreciated. I can’t wait to see what Tyler Bate does down the line.

Michael Dante vs. Rob Lynch
These two were half of a chaotic Hoss Fight™ at Chapter 24 between the Sumerian Death Squad and The London Riots, which I thought was a ridiculous amount of fun before screeching to a bit of a messy halt with a wacky non-finish that left me with more questions than answers. That being said, it was still of such massive quality that I wanted to see what came to be afterwards given the intentionally ambiguous end to things. And this is even more interesting to me, since I’ve not actually seen Michael Dante in singles action yet and I’m intrigued to see how he handles himself without one of the best wrestlers in the world in Tommy End by his side.

Jim Smallman announces that the winner of this match gets to decide a stipulation for the Riots/SDS rematch. No lockups here as you would imagine, as we start with a trading of forearms before Dante shitcans Lynch. It heads back into the ring fairly quickly, and both men struggle to wobble the other with clotheslines until Rob Lynch fires off a wacky enzuigiri before sending Dante FLYING with a sweet Belly-to-Belly! Lynch tries coming off of the apron, but Dante sweeps his leg and LYNCH NEARLY DIES on the landing. Needless to say, Dante is in firm control here. Rob Lynch escapes back suplex, but runs into a crazy backdrop that gets Dante a nearfall. Lynch is able to fight back once more, wiping out Dante with a Tope Suicida! Dante laughs maniacally at Lynch for some reason and they trade forearms and clotheslines until Dante drops Lynch on his head with a half-nelson suplex, before Dante sends him flying with a POUNCE variant. Lynch battles back with a lariat, and a spear gives Lynch the win in 9 minutes. **1/2 The first four minutes of this match was great stuff with both guys just throwing one another around and beating the hell out of one another, but they didn’t really up the intensity much more from that, and the match stagnated a bit because of it. Not to say it went down the tubes, but they hit a ceiling and thus, so does my rating. One thing that didn’t really sit right was Rob Lynch winning with a spear after getting his neck mangled for the entire match, so I can’t be too generous with this despite my adoration for a good mean guy match. It had its purpose though and as I said, the beginning minutes were off the charts fun.

Lynch takes the mic after the match and stops Dante from going to the back. He says he and his Conor McGregor wannabe partner need to know that he and James Davis are the first team of PROGRESS. Their stipulation is a Tables, Ladders, & Chairs match! That’s gonna be wacky and I CAN’T WAIT.

Zack Gibson vs. Mark Haskins
Haskins had a pretty low-key Chapter 24, having a fun match with Bubblegum to open the show while Zack Gibson was a big part of the main event on the same show so this is pretty logical matchmaking if you want to start creeping Haskins up the card again while keeping Zack Gibson on the fringe of the scene too.

Gibson fares well in the early grappling, keeping pace with the speedy Haskins in the first exchange of the match. Haskins’ taped shoulder works against him too, as Gibson uses that later on to keep Haskins at bay. Haskins has to resort to forearms to fight his way out of a precarious situation, and he’s able to roll Gibson into the Sharpshooter as a result. Gibson is fresh enough to find the ropes though, but Haskins stays on him. Haskins springs to the apron, where Gibson slingshots Mark’s bad shoulder into the top rope before posting him shoulder-first. Gibson gets to work on the arm, hitting a really clever Hammerlock DDT after Haskins tries to fire up. Gibson then tries a variation on a short-arm scissor, but the crowd is able to will Haskins to the ropes. Haskins dares Gibson to keep hitting him, which only gets Haskins going more, and they throw leather in the center of the ring before Haskins sends Gibson reeling to the outside for a fake-out Tope Suicida! Haskins keeps the comeback rolling, hitting an Edge-O-Matic after Gibson is able to avoid Made in Japan. Haskins tries targeting Gibson’s leg, beautifully countering a leg drop into an Ankle Lock! Gibson shoos him away, but Haskins follows up… only for Gibson to go back after the shoulder and stiff Haskins with a lariat! Haskins kicks out. Haskins escapes Shankly Gates and counters a Tiger Driver into a Triangle Choke! Gibson tries to hoist him up to counter, but Haskins ROLLS INTO A CROSS ARMBREAKER! Gibson slithers out, but Haskins LOCKS ON THE STAR ARMBAR! Gibson is able to find the ropes. Haskins escapes Shankly Gates one more, and rolls into a Death Valley Driver that Gibson is able to kick out of. Haskins goes for the Stretch Muffler, but Gibson is again able to find the ropes. He staggers up and enzuigiris Haskins arm, followed by a diving Lungblower for a nearfall! Gibson Driver (ha!) scores for Zack, but Haskins won’t stay down. Gibson is finally able to get Haskins to stay still long enough for Shankly Gates, but Haskins is able to roll through for a Made in Japan, but Gibson counters out! Stretch Muffler gets the win for Mark Haskins in 19 minutes. ***1/2 I appreciated this match tremendously as an exercise in wrestling psychology, but it had a lack of excitement that prevented me from really becoming infatuated. Haskins did a tremendous job of selling the arm just as Gibson did wonderfully targeting it when he was in a bind, and it appears Gibson is actually one of the more fundamentally sound technical workers in the company at this point. He won’t wow you as such, he’ll just provide you with credible, technical wrestling that does a great job at being the foil to the more zany, fast-paced PROGRESS babyfaces. It even blended well with Haskins, who has a similar credo to his wrestling, only differing in that Mark does it about ten times faster and is pretty much the Energizer Bunny. Basically, this is what you’d expect from a match between these two to be, and that’s a good thing because it had some awesome storytelling in it, and who can complain about psychology?

Flash Morgan Webster vs. Paul Robinson
Paul Robinson hasn’t been doing much of anything since losing his title match to Will Ospreay at Chapter 22, but Webster is coming off of a really fun title shot at the Manchester debut. I can’t say that I’ve really appreciated Flash’s singles outings in the PROGRESS outings I’ve reviewed thus far, but I’m a man who’s okay with being proven wrong.

No tie-ups or wacky technical wrestling to start here, instead it’s Webster running wild on Robinson, who decides to grab a chair in response. He tries a wacky Eddie Guerrero low-blow by distracting the referee, but Webster is eating his lunch despite all of these antics. Robinson dodges a Webster dive, but doesn’t account for the somersault Flash does from the apron as Robinson jaws with the crowd. Robinson is able to get control back by just being a bastard, pulling Flash face-first into the second turnbuckle and soccer kicking him immediately thereafter. Robinson jaws with Flash, who throws a frying pan chop to the chest in retaliation. Robinson roundhouses him in the face for his troubles, though. Webster uses Robinson’s willingness to jaw with the audience against him, battling back with authority with a high cross and a moonsault press. Robinson escapes the Brit Pop Drop and puts him in the Shattered Dreams position, but Webster dodges a move and rolls into a Victory Roll for 2. Webster heads up top, but Robinson meets him… only for Webster to send him down. Webster misses a 450 and runs into a nasty lariat from Robinson, who follows up with Ospreay’s wacky spin kick for a nearfall. Robinson toys with Flash with punches, which makes Webster flip him off… only for Robinson to bite his finger! That only pisses Flash off, and the Brit Pop Drop Scores followed by the Angel’s Wings for a two count. Webster heads up top again, but Robinson rolls out to the apron, crotches Webster on the second turnbuckle again, and hits a sweet Curb Stomp from the second rope for a nearfall. Robinson is an angry Dobby, and throws punches at Webster and pushes the ref away until he’s DQ’d in 12 minutes. **1/2 Just the finish they needed to really put an exclamation point on this thoroughly mediocre match-up. I just cannot find myself enamored by Flash Morgan Webster at this point, which is a shame because it’s clear PROGRESS believes in him. In a company that has Will Ospreay, it’s just so hard to get invested in such a generic high-flyer when the cream of the crop is headlining your shows. Robinson is so much different from anyone in the company that his scumbag antics make any match interesting for a bit, but Webster is too bland to really provide an accurate foil for him. It was fundamentally sound and told a good enough story, but everything else was so plain and middling that nothing really felt like it mattered. And nothing’s worse than getting a DQ finish in a match that desperately needed a hot go-home stretch, because it feels like I wasted my time and it’s not like what they did here made me want to see them have a feud.

Robinson keeps beating Webster down until Robinson’s jawing with a crowd member for his chair turns out to be his undoing, as Morgan dropkicks him off the apron. Robinson gets physical with the ref again, and security intervenes to escort Paul Robinson to the back.

Toni Storm vs. Dahlia Black vs. Pollyanna vs. Jinny
Hey, the first women’s match on any of the Chapters I’ve reviewed thus far. With me not being incredibly hip on independent women’s wrestling, I can’t say I’ve actually seen any four of these ladies wrestle, but I did have to sit through an embarrassing Jinny vs. Pollyanna video package for three shows in a row so I’m very aware of who they are at least. But considering it’s PROGRESS and I doubt they’d put shit ladies’ wrestling on a main show, I’m going into this one with high expectations.

Dahlia Black’s entrance is just delightfully sleazy as some creepy dude (TK Cooper who we will see later on in this PROGRESS run) comes out with her and just kisses her and gropes her the entire time. Toni Storm looks like Paige Van Zant with the doofy facial expression and everything but comes off as generic as generic can get. Jinny comes out looking like Maureen Ponderosa with the WORST theme music of all time, a melodramatic female cover of fucking TURN MY SWAG ON. Not a remix or a freestyle mind you, but a legitimately a COVER, with a woman singing ridiculously off-key through the entire thing and wailing like Beyonce. Then during the introductions, she has Jim Smallman claim that she’s wearing something made by Gucci’s FINEST CHILD SLAVES. I’ve decided I adore Jinny. Pollyanna’s theme music manages to make Jinny’s look like Radiohead in their prime though, because it’s a DUBSTEP REMIX of the goddamned Game of Thrones theme song. A dubstep entrance theme. In 2016. AND SHE’S A BABYFACE. This has to be a Saints Row IV simulation or something, right?

Jinny immediately tries to convince Dahlia Black to work with her, only for Jinny to yank her down by the hair as Dahlia charges the babyfaces! Jinny tries to use that to get an upper hand on Storm and Pollyana, who catch her coming off the top rope and just chuck her into the turnbuckles. It’s all babyfaces early off of that. And I really don’t like to be that guy when it comes to women’s wrestling – though considering some of the things I’ve said about Matt Riddle in private, it’s really only a practice in equality – but Toni Storm’s backside is of high, high quality. Me oh my. Pollyanna and Toni Storm take the heels outside, where Pollyanna kicks TK Cooper below the belt, while Jinny’s assistant tries to help Jinny get away from Toni Storm. The babyfaces set the heels on chairs, and cross paths as they take both down with knees! Pollyanna and Toni finally meet in the ring, where Toni tries a cheeky roll-up. Toni Storm uses her ass to her advantage, hitting a She Calls It The Rearview, only for Pollyanna to set Toni up on the ropes horizontally only for Dahlia to come back in and use Toni as a stepping stone to bat Pollyanna to the floor. Jinny finally comes back in and puts in a dope Camel Clutch/Boston Crab on Dahlia and Toni, only for Pollyanna to break it, put Jinny in a Gory Special, and PUT IN THE CAMEL CLUTCH/BOSTON CRAB HERSELF! Jinny’s assistant Elizabeth breaks it up with hairspray, however. Jinny orders Elizabeth to beat the hell out of Pollyanna as she rests in a chair Elizabeth set up for her as TK Cooper fans Dahlia Black outside hilariously. Elizabeth has a pair of scissors in her hands, and Jinny wants her to cut Pollyanna’s hair. Elizabeth refuses, so Jinny throws her down only to run into Pollyanna… only to eat a Botox Injection. Jinny takes the scissors and cuts Pollyanna’s hair herself to show Elizabeth what’s what, but Toni Storm blindsides her and takes away the scissors! Toni boots Jinny out of the ring, but turns into a roundhouse from Dahlia Black. Dahlia looks for a moonsault, but Pollyanna chucks her off the top rope into the clutches of TK Cooper. Toni dives out onto the South Pacific Power Couple with a flash TOPE SUICIDA! Pollyanna wipes out everybody with a dive from the top rope, and she throws Dahlia in the ring to try and finish it. Dahlia fights her off and looks for the moonsault again, but that ends in a SLOPPY TOWER OF DOOM~! Toni Storm tries to cover everyone, but only gets 2. Jinny catches a running Toni with a Japanese armdrag into the corner, but only gets 2. Toni dodges a Jinny double stomp and drops Jinny on her head with a German, but runs into a shotgun dropkick from Dahlia Black into the corner. Dahlia Black turns into a Pollenator from Pollyanna, but TK Cooper PUNCHES HER in the face. Jinny kicks him in the dick, and pins Pollyanna for the cheap win in 13 minutes. ***3/4 This wasn’t incredibly graceful or well-executed all the time, but boy was it a ton of fun with a bunch of awesome contributions from everyone involved. There’s something to be said for wrestlers who are more character than wrestler, and I think Jinny was a perfect example in this match. I mean, sure, she’s a competent wrestler, but she thrived so much as the irredeemable bitch heel throughout the entire match that it didn’t matter that she didn’t do big spots. Wrestling is best when you’re highlighting strengths, and this match was an exercise in that booking philosophy. Toni Storm and Pollyanna were the cute, fiery babyfaces that the crowd loved unconditionally and since they were up against two very easy-to-hate characters in Jinny and Dahlia Black, the heel/face dynamic was a ready-made formula that worked to a tee. I think from the entrances that defined these characters immediately, to the furious action, to the psychology of each woman’s plight in the match, this has to be considered a rousing success. And this is coming from a shitty yank who hasn’t seen any of these women wrestle. What a fun, fun match.

Jim Smallman throws us to a video package for the main event. It’s okay, but after the big presentation for the Havoc vs. Ospreay match at Chapter 20, it’s going to be hard to really wow me.

PROGRESS Title: Will Ospreay © vs. Marty Scurll
This is a No DQ match. While Ospreay has been the ultimate babyface champion, he faces his toughest test yet against a guy who could literally not be more different than him on the character scale. After all, Scurll started his biggest run by kicking a man with stomach cancer in the gut, so we’re dealing with a real rascal here. Ospreay has had some awesome outings as champion, but on the surface, it seems his act as a humble babyface champion can only drive the top of the card so long.

They throw slaps early until Ospreay sends Scurll to the floor with a 540 Kick before coming out on top of him with a BEAUTIFUL springboard corkscrew moonsault. Scurll fights right back and gives him a release suplex on the apron. He picks up the umbrella and whacks Ospreay out of mid-air with a shot to the back, stopping the champ in his tracks. Ospreay tries a casadora, but Scurll catches him to try for a Chickenwing, only for Ospreay to roll out and hit a standing shooter for a two count. Scurll slaps the taste out of his mouth, which makes Will head out to the floor to recuperate. Oh, but he suckers him in and stops a Tope with a steel chair! Ospreay looks for a Shooting Star of fof the apron, but Marty gets his feet up and sends Ospreay into the steps by the big screen… where OSPREAY MOONSAULTS OFF AND TAKES SCURLL OUT! Ospreay looks for the Sami Zayn DDT through the turnbuckles, but Marty catches him, snaps his fingers, whacks him with an umbrella, and finally finishes off that sequence with a superkick from the apron. That puts the challenger in firm control as things finally spill back into the ring where Marty targets Ospreay’s arm. Ospreay tries to fight back, scouting Marty’s armwork and hitting his beautiful back handspring spinning enzuigiri. Marty dodges the Essex Destroyer, but runs into a C4 on the rebound for a nearfall. A Shooting Star eats knees, and soon enough Ospreay finds himself in trouble as Marty tries the Chickenwing out of an O’Connor Roll. Ospreay is able to get the ropes. Marty baits Ospreay into trading slaps and ends up trying a Kobashi-esque chop spree, but Ospreay just resorts to headbutting Scurll to create separation… only for Scurll to throw a headbutt back. Scurll gets a little lackadaiscial on the 10 Punches, which almost earns him a Cheeky Nandos kick, but Scurll escapes… only for OSPREAY TO HIT THE JUST KIDDING SUPERKICK! SUPERKICK FROM OSPREAY! LARIAT FROM SCURLL! SUPLEX COUNTERED INTO A STUNNER! REVERSE RANA… COUNTERED… OSCUTTER… COUNTERED INTO A CHICKENWING~! Scurll can’t lock it in but hits a reverse suplex, and walks through a couple Yakuza Kicks… ONLY FOR OSPREAY TO DROP HIM WITH A 540 KICK! Jeez, lads. Both men slink to the outside, where Marty Scurll just pulls out a comical amount of umbrellas… only for Ospreay to pull out a table! They drop their weapons and throw leather in the center of the ring, but a knee catches a running Ospreay dead and drops him for a nearfall. Scurll uses some downtime to set up the table in the middle of the ring before putting Will up top presumably for a superplex, but Ospreay slips under and hits a Cheeky Nandos before powerbombing Marty through the table! Marty kicks out. Marty slinks out to the floor to rest in a chair, but Ospreay follows him out and dropkicks him out of it. They brawl up to the Electric Ballroom stage, dangerously close to the announce table. Ospreay tries to suplex Scurll down the stairs, but Scurll grabs his hand and SNAPS THE FINGERS, which crumbles the champion. Scurll throws him through the curtain, but Will comes back with a monkey bar Frankensteiner… BUT MARTY POWERBOMBS OSPREAY THROUGH THE ANNOUNCE TABLE~! Marty picks Ospreay’s carcass up and chucks him in the ring for a JUMPING TOMBSTONE! Ospreay kicks out! Scurll is pissed, so he wipes out referee Chris Roberts with an umbrella. He grabs another one, but Ospreay puts on a Crossface with the umbrella! Marty taps, but the ref is out of comission. Scurll recovers and kicks Ospreay low, and HITS THE ESSEX DESTROYER! Here’s a new ref! OSPREAY KICKS OUT! Ospreay defiantly throws the middle finger at Scurll, who destroys him… BUT OSPREAY FLIPS OUT OF A TORNADO DDT! BIG BOOT! SCURLL COUNTERS INTO AN ORANGE CRUSH CHICKENWING!~! HOLY SHIT! HIS ARM DROPS TWICE!!!!! OSPREAY’S STILL UP! OSPREAY ELBOWS OUT! BRYAN DANIELSON ELBOWS FROM SCURLL! OSPREAY POWERS UP AGAIN! OSCUTTER~! SHOOTING STAR TO THE BACK! RED ARROW! SCURLL KICKS OUT~! This is insanity! SAMI ZAYN DDT ON THE OUTSIDE! Scurll counters an Essex Destroyer with a right hook, but Will kicks out again! Marty HANDCUFFS Ospreay’s hands behind his back, and he takes a bit of a breather. Ospreay’s “oh fuck” facial expression is outstanding. Ospreay is still defiant, but Scurll superkicks him down, but three superkicks aren’t enough to keep him down. Scurll just goes mental with umbrella shots afterwards, but Ospreay still spits in his face… ONLY FOR SCURLL TO SMACK HIM IN THE HEAD WITH AN UMBRELLA! OSPREAY GETS A SHOULDER UP! CHICKENWING! Ospreay passes out, and we have a new PROGRESS Champion at the 30 minute mark. ****1/2 Quite possibly the finest match I’ve seen under the PROGRESS banner, and even only six shows (and a few extra Jimmy Havoc matches) in, that’s quite an incredible achievement. I know Will Ospreay is an incredibly polarizing figure to the internet at large and that’s one hundred percent okay. Expecting everyone to feel the same way I do about wrestlers and their merits is an incredibly stupid thought process to have. But with that being said, I really don’t buy into any arguments of Mr. Ospreay being a spot monkey. Of course, there are always going to be those wrestling fans who will insist they’re right as rain about everything so sometimes opinions can’t change, but when you watch matches like this, I find it hard to stomach that Will Ospreay is just a faceless indie flippy guy. He was absolutely phenomenal every step of the way here, and did so much in the way of psychological good to help Marty get over as THE top heel of PROGRESS that he must be commended. His athleticism worked so well as a foil to the slower, more grounded heel-work of Marty Scurll and his facial expression once he figured out he was handcuffed was beautiful storytelling. It’s at that point everyone knew we’d be seeing a new champion, but people still tried to will the champ up from unenviable odds. That’s a sign to me that Will Ospreay is one of the best babyface sellers in the business when it comes to working from underneath, on par with a Chad Gable or Sami Zayn even. He was so unbelievably great in this match that even though I was ready for Scurll to win the belt from him, it was still kind of a hit in the gut. But it had to be done, because if there was ever a match in which Scurll needed to win, this was it. The stars aligned for him perfectly as this almost flawless half-hour segment of wrestling wore on, and he did so well switching gears from simply dastardly to utter psychopath as he became more desperate. His issues dealing with Ospreay’s inhuman quickness forced him to sink to his lowest level, but at the same time, it was Will’s undoing. As the commentary let on, Ospreay let himself be manipulated and angered into agreeing to face The Villain in a No DQ match, and that stipulation ended up losing him the title in the end. At the end of the night, Marty Scurll played the better mental game than Will Ospreay. Sometimes the heel is just better at something than the babyface, and this was an excellent example. I could go on for hours about how unbelievably phenomenal this match is, but given I’m 5000 words into this review, I’ll rein it in a little bit. But overall, this was basically everything I love about professional wrestling in a nice 30 minute package. Long Live The Villain!

Ospreay comes to after the match, and gets a pretty awesome standing ovation as the show signs off. The cheeky fucker deserves it, that’s for sure.

7.5
The final score: review Good
The 411
There was nothing on the undercard of PROGRESS Chapter 25 that could really make it a classic, but if you're looking to burn 3 hours watching wrestling, you could do much worse than this show. Without even mentioning the outstanding main event, you have a relentlessly fun women's four-way, some great technical wrestling with Zack Gibson and Mark Haskins, and some good fun with Tyler Bate early on. So while this isn't THE best show of PROGRESS' history, it's damn worthy of standing beside the rest of their catalogue and if anything, you should at the very least watch the Scurll vs. Ospreay main event. Healthy recommendation for Chapter 25.
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