wrestling / Columns

Wrestling’s 4Rs: The Right, Wrong and Ridiculous of WWE Raw

July 31, 2015 | Posted by Jack Stevenson

How the 4Rs of wRestling Work!
Here is a quick explanation of the 4R’s. The column will run TWO times a week. We will group our feelings on the shows in various categories: The Right, the wRong and the Ridiculous. The Right is stuff that worked very well: a great promo, a great match and so on. PuRgatoRy is a section between the right and wrong. It shows equal traits from both sides that cannot be ignored and needs discussed. It is not a bad place per say, as things can get remedied or go the wrong way the very next week. The wRong is what it sounds like: bad matches, bad or boring promos and so on. The Ridiculous is stuff that had no right on TV: Stupid angles and so on. And there is always a possibility of a 5th R, which is as bad as they come. This column is supposed to be analytical, and at the right time very critical of the shows, it was the whole reason it was created. This is not a “mark” column, nor a “smark” column, our goal is to analyze the show from many different fronts, reward the good and call out the bad. We will not apologize for our opinions, they are as they are, whether positive or negative.


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By: Jack Stevenson


Raw 7.27.15:
QUICK MATCH RESULTS:
* The Big Show d. Dean Ambrose
* Neville d. Fandango
* Sasha Banks d. Paige
* The Lucha Dragons d. Los Matadores
* Becky Lynch & Charlotte d. Nikki Bella & Alicia Fox
* Randy Orton d. Kevin Owens via DQ
* John Cena d. Seth Rollins

THE Right:
Dean Ambrose vs. The Big Show: Raw began with The Authority bragging that this week’s episode would feature all these first time ever matches, and also that Summerslam 2015 would be four hours long, with Cool Dad Triple H proving an enthusiastic subscriber to the “more is more” theory of pro wrestling production. I think ‘four hour wrestling show’ as a concept should have been rejected at the drawing board but the idea of a Monday Night Raw largely dedicated to new combinations of wrestlers was obviously a welcome one, even though all the crowing on commentary about how wonderful it was that new things were happening this week rather raised the question about what it is we’re seeing all the other weeks. Regurgitated piffle? Well, yes, but you’re not meant to draw attention to it. This is all a long-winded way of introducing Dean Ambrose vs. The Big Show, which I thought was one of the two First Time Ever matches that delivered the goods. I did not expect it to deliver the goods. In fact, I didn’t even think it was true to claim that it was an original match-up- I imagined we’d have seen it several times before, except in the past it’s been known as ‘Dean Ambrose vs. Kane.’ As it happened, The Lunatic Fringe and the Giant turned in a pretty nifty little opener that was easily distinguishable from other matches Ambrose has had against seven-foot tall bad guys. Dean came into the bout with a cool and quirky array of ideas, including escaping a submission hold by untying Big Show’s boot to cause a distraction, and then just flinging himself repeatedly in the general direction of his oversized opponent in an attempt to cut him down to size. You could argue that Ambrose shouldn’t be losing to drifting veterans like Show at this stage of his career, but I felt the finishing stretch, in which he twice avoided getting counted out before falling foul of the old ‘third time unlucky’ system, was much more dramatic than it had any right to be and made him look genuinely quite valiant. Even commentary was improved by the addition of the excellent Miz who is one of the more underrated performers of 2015 so far. I could have done without the coda, in which Big Show became the latest in a long line of contemporary WWE wrestlers to smash clumsily through the bit of fan barricade that conveniently falls away into a relatively comfortable area, but otherwise this was a legitimately good match which I would be happy to see again.

Paige vs. Sasha Banks: Aside from ‘it was the best women’s match on Raw in absolutely ages,’ there’s not much I have to say about this. It was just a good match, you know? There was nothing particularly inventive or unique, but it had two refreshingly talented wrestlers stringing together well-executed moves, shifting through the gears smoothly towards the finishing stretch, and wrapping the match up in a satisfying manner. It was presented deadly seriously, as worthy of respect as any men’s match on the card. I was deeply skeptical of this ‘Divas Revolution’ (and I still think that title is incredibly vain and self regarding on the part of WWE), but they seem honestly committed to it, and even if it peters about as the lazy Fall season arrives, we’ll hopefully get a few more accomplished matches out of it.

Cold Fish: Since that ugly, neutered, skinny legged pee head Dolph Ziggler has taken leave from our Monday nights to sooth his obliterated throat, the Rusev/Lana/Summer Rae angle has steadily improved. This is not a coincidence. This week’s antics were the finest hour of the soap opera so far, as it made a decisive shift from ‘ludicrous in a bad way’ to ‘ludicrous in a good and self aware way.’ Rusev took to the ring to shower his lady friend Summer Rae with gifts, gifts that entirely coincidentally could be worked into insults to be thrown at Ziggler and Lana. This led to the delightfully surreal image of the Bulgarian Brute stoically presenting Summer with a dead fish, solely so he could compare Lana to one. It was performed tremendously well and was really really funny. Rusev is strangely charming as this comically bitter spurned boyfriend, desperately trying to move on while clearly being nowhere near ready to do that, and Summer Rae’s blind, naive faith in this man makes her more likeable than she may ever have been in WWE. Lana is still a bit annoying though, and her brawl with Summer Rae that closed the segment out was flat and predictable- still, the segment as a whole made for enjoyable television.

The Lucha Dragons vs. Los Matadores: It was hard to get a measure of how good this match actually was, because the outside the ring antics largely overwhelmed it. It was a bit strange that the needling between the Prime Time Players and The New Day was transplanted over the top of a match that was only tangibly related to their feud, and maybe it would have been cleaner if these two overlapping events had been segregated into different segments. Still, the segment had a lot of value as it was, with Darren Young and Titus O’Neil continuing their strange yet worthy quest to belittle and undermine WWE’s entire approach to commentary. Young’s attempt to coin the catchphrase “woah, these guys’ really know how to wow the crowd!” was really funny, and actually has probably been said unironically multiple times by the cavalcade of anonymous male humans who call the action on Superstars. Meanwhile, the GIF circling the internet of the New Day prancing down to ringside with the sign proclaiming Kingston the ‘World’s Greatest Dad’ is the sort of thing I will get tattooed on my arm whenever we figure out how to tattoo GIFs. Big E is funnier than a significant proportion of professional funny people. I would happily watch another few weeks of the Prime Time Players and the New Day just being silly.

puRgatoRy:
Neville vs. Fandango: Not much of a match, and it was a bit sad to see Fandango so thoroughly downtrodden, but Stardust is throwing himself right into his ‘supervillain’ persona and delivered a convincing promo on Neville post match (well, about as convincing as you can get playing Goldust’s confused alien brother with a working knowledge of pop culture tropes from Planet Earth), which was met with suitable bemusement from the fan favorite. It looks like their feud might have a bit of mojo to it, and that would be most welcome considering they’re both fine wrestlers who desperately need something to sink their teeth into.

Randy Orton vs. Kevin Owens: For me, this was the most instantly appealing of the First Time Ever matches that Cool Dad Triple H announced at the start of the show, but it didn’t really live up to its potential. Kevin Owens is a super wrestler and so is Randy Orton, but neither looked especially motivated here. They seemed to feel like an adequate slugfest would do (which in fairness it would considering the match was only going to end with Sheamus) and so an adequate slugfest they put on. There was a brief spurt of excitement after the match when Cesaro stormed into the ring to rescue Orton from a two on one beatdown at the hands of Sheamus and Owens, looking like a complete bad-ass and a guy you could definitely get behind, but other than that this was all just there.

THE wRong:
The Boring World of Bray Wyatt: Blah blah blah blah blah. Spooky spooky spooky. Luke Harper is back and if rumors are to be believed a certain Leo Kruger might also be tempted into the fold, but all these cosmetic changes will do no good whatsoever if the core problem with the Bray Wyatt character isn’t fixed. If you’re going to have a character who is given significant time to cut outlandish, cryptic promos that have little grounding in the familiar world of pro wrestling, you’ve got to make that character seem really incredibly important, else no one’s going to make the effort to care. Wyatt is just another talented midcarder at this stage, but there are other talented midcarders that are much more low maintenance, the sort that can drift about doing nothing important for half a year and yet not become actively annoying. Wyatt’s promos are actively annoying when there’s no sense that they might mean something really. They’re boring. You tune out when you hear his voice. It’s just droning, a monotonous ramble that refuses to end. Make him disappear for a few months, and when he comes back have him do something violent to Triple H. If Wyatt is a threat to the whole darn company suddenly, there’s a reason to try and decipher all his metaphors and allusions. At the moment, he’s as stale as anything and everyone knows it.

John Cena vs. Seth Rollins: They won’t main event Summerslam with Taker and Lesnar to compete with, but as a consolation prize Cena and Rollins did get to headline this episode of Raw! (Sometimes my introductions to these little paragraphs are rather lame). Their match certainly had things going for it, there were some quality near falls towards the end and the drama of those were magnified by John Cena’s exploded nose, which must have been a real pain in the, um, nasal area for the U.S. Champ but added a veneer of grit and realism to proceedings on the whole, as Cena fought through obvious, blood spattered discomfort to submit Seth Rollins emphatically with the STF. Unfortunately, despite its plus points this match still reminded me of a house show main event at points, with the fan favorite winning for no good reason other than ‘it’s a live event so we have to send people home happy,’ except no, it’s not a live event, it’s Monday Night Raw and your WWE World Heavyweight Champion just tapped out in the middle of the ring. Worse, he tapped out having been told over the last two weeks that he was a terrible champion, a disgrace to the rich history of the title, by the worst kind of John Cena there is. We’re getting the smug, self satisfied John Cena right now, the man whose every word quavers under the weight of fake sincerity, and what’s worse is that this is often a precursor to ‘John Cena the wise-cracker,’ who should be shot into the sun. What I’m driving at is that the booking of this feud is really bad and is dragging the absolute worst out of two excellent performers. The world doesn’t need a reprisal of the Cena-Rollins feud and with Taker-Lesnar the main selling point of Summerslam, it might have been more worthy for these two to experiment with new opponents, hand picked from beneath them on the card. As things stand, we’re getting a shallow and derivative rivalry that only the most devoted John Cena fan could derive any enjoyment from.

THE Ridiculous:
NOTHING

The 411:

It didn’t have something like the Undertaker-Brock Lesnar brawl from the last week that grabbed you by the lapels and shook you vigorously, but this was still a good Raw with some fun stuff happening in it. A surprisingly good outing for the Big Show against Dean Ambrose, the Divas Renaissance continuing apace, Rusev, The Prime Time Players and the New Day showing off some comedy skills, all of it was fun and it was scattered all about the show to keep things moving along nicely .Some of the booking was uninspired but that comes with the territory, and on the whole this was still a fairly rewarding way to spend three hours, if you must spend three hours doing just the one thing.

Show Rating: 7.0

As a reminder, I will be going by the 411 scale…

0 – 0.9: Torture
1 – 1.9: Extremely Horrendous
2 – 2.9: Very Bad
3 – 3.9: Bad
4 – 4.9: Poor
5 – 5.9: Not So Good
6 – 6.9: Average
7 – 7.9: Good
8 – 8.9:Very Good
9 – 9.9: Amazing
10: Virtually Perfect

The 1011th edition is over…

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I’m out…

article topics :

RAW, Wrestling's 4Rs, WWE, Jack Stevenson