Wrestling’s 4Rs: The Right, Wrong and Ridiculous of WWE Raw

How the 4Rs of wRestling Work!
Here is a quick explanation of the 4R’s. The column will run TWO-THREE times a week. We will group our feelings on the shows in various categories: The Right, the wRong and the Ridiculous. The Right is stuff that worked very well: a great promo, a great match and so on. PuRgatoRy is a section between the right and wrong. It shows equal traits from both sides that cannot be ignored and needs discussed. It is not a bad place per say, as things can get remedied or go the wrong way the very next week. The wRong is what it sounds like: bad matches, bad or boring promos and so on. The Ridiculous is stuff that had no right on TV: Stupid angles and so on. And there is always a possibility of a 5th R, which is as bad as they come. This column is supposed to be analytical, and at the right time very critical of the shows, it was the whole reason it was created. This is not a “mark” column, nor a “smark” column, our goal is to analyze the show from many different fronts, reward the good and call out the bad. We will not apologize for our opinions, they are as they are, whether positive or negative.

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Raw 10.17.16:
– Seth Rollins defeated Chris Jericho @ 14:40 via pin
– Mark Henry & The Golden Truth defeated The Shining Stars & Titus O’Neil @ 3:10 via pin
– Big E defeated Sheamus @ 10:25 via pin
– Bo Dallas defeated Neville @ 2:53 via pin
– Dana Brooke defeated Bayley @ 4:10 via pin
– Braun Strowman defeated The Mile High Trio @ 2:12 via pin – Big Cass defeated Karl Anderson @ 1:12 via pin
– Brian Kendrick, Tony Nese and Drew Gulak defeated TJ Perkins, Cedric Alexander and Rich Swann @ 7:20 via pin

THE Right:
Chris Jericho vs. Seth Rollins: An up and down couple of segments to start the show. First, Jericho and Owens hit the ring for the usual enjoyable banter, but also to put over the danger of Hell in a Cell. Seth Rollins then interrupted to cut a pretty dismal WWE fan favourite promo, including the absolutely atrocious ‘sparkle crotch’ line. If there was any justice, fans would now mock Seth mercilessly for months on the internet the same way they did Reigns with his “sufferin’ succotash son” line, but because Rollins can do flips he is immune from that kind of scrutiny. He is, of course, very good at the pro wrestling, and demonstrated this with another fine match against Jericho. They obviously have excellent chemistry together, and Y2J seems more at ease wrestling Seth then he does other wrestlers from the indy darling generation. Some exciting near falls were strung together, and in the end Rollins picked up a comfortable victory to make him look that bit stronger going into Hell in a Cell with Owens. The strength of the match more than outweighs the sporadic stupidity of the preceding promo.

Big E vs. Sheamus: The New Day celebrated their 420th day as WWE Tag Team Champions in, of all places, Denver, Colorado. Not especially funny jokes were made about this coincidence, and then Big E settled down to take on Sheamus in a highly enjoyable big man battle. Lots of really impressive, forceful looking power moves, and some good near falls. It was a pity it was all leading to a distraction roll up finish as Cesaro distracted Sheamus, but as long as the tag title match itself between the New Day and CeShearo doesn’t go that way, we may well be in for a great contest come Sunday.

Sami Zayn vs. Braun Strowman: After yet another Strowman squash, this time dispatching three guys at the same time, I was all ready to moan about how his run of one sided annihilations seemed to continue into perpetuity, never actually going anywhere. And then Sami Zayn came down to the ring to confront him, and hey, all of a sudden, the future looks bright for Braun! This is a feud that should work for everyone. The relatively inexperienced Strowman gets several matches with a world class pro wrestler who can help him develop and become a more well rounded wrestler. Zayn gets an opponent who will highlight his strengths as the ultimate sympathetic underdog, and also looks like a bad-ass for being the only one on the roster with the guts to stand up to Braun. It’s simple booking, but it should be hugely effective. I approve.

Meet the Rusevs: I don’t think it can be said enough that Rusev is just tremendous. A good wrestler, of course, but what really sets him apart is his comic timing, his ability to work comedy into his character without sacrificing any credibility, the way he can effortlessly switch on the intensity when he needs to and appear genuinely terrifying against pretty much anyone… the guy seems to get just everything about being a WWE wrestler and it’s a little strange that he’s never really got close to a world championship. Anyway, what I’m leading up to here is that hearing all about Rusev’s family was such good fun, Mother Rusev is a two time rowing champion, Father Rusev is a military hero and wrestling champion, and Brother Rusev is Bulgaria’s finest chef. The reaction of the Bulgarian Brute when the crowd booed all of them was hilarious, especially him furiously exclaiming to the crowd “don’t you dare boo my Mother!” Once Roman Reigns came out, things kind of petered out. Roman’s jokes weren’t very funny because only heels have the room to be actually witty in modern WWE (case in point: The New Day), and then it all descended into the kind of brawl we’ve already seen a hundred times between the two of them. Still, the majority of this was such good fun, and it gets into the right as a result!

GOOOOOOOLDBEEEEEERRRRGGGGG: Whisper it quietly, but this… was great. Really great. Having spent the last couple of weeks thoroughly disenchanted with the prospect of Goldberg returning with copious hullaballoo and grandeur, all for the purpose of a ** ¼ match with Brock Lesnar, I was pleasantly surprised to find myself really, really loving the sheer spectacle of his return. Was the crowd reaction a little phony? I mean, I’m not arguing for a moment that Denver wasn’t genuinely excited to see Goldberg again, but the “holy shit!” and “this is awesome!” chants were directly recycled from Shane McMahon’s return earlier in the year, and felt like an attempt to force an iconic moment when there wasn’t really one there. Goldberg, for all his immensely respectable achievements in the business, was very much of his time. His peak lasted for about a year, he had at best one or two really good matches, and he’s been well away from the industry for over a decade. His influence isn’t really apparent on the modern wrestling landscape, and as such the response from the crowd to him was a strangely detached, calculated enthusiasm. It fit in with the overall sense that, while this return was nice and all, no one would have lost sleep if it hadn’t happened, least of all Goldberg.

But then, Goldberg opened his mouth, and in the space of a few minutes completely won me over with a just terrific promo. It was inspiring and invigorating, and made the prospect of Lesnar-Goldberg II at Survivor Series much more exciting than it was this time last week. What was most impressive was that the material itself could have been such saccharine, sentimental nonsense, with the references to making his young son proud of him and being a superhero for children everywhere. But Goldberg delivered it with such heart on his sleeve conviction that it really was legitimately touching. By the end, when he was threatening to make Brock Lesnar next, and possibly even last, I was right there with him. Goldberg vs. Lesnar at Survivor Series! Maybe this will be fucking amazing after all! So, for something that could have just been empty nostalgia in the service of promoting a video game, this was actually excellent, rewarding viewing. A great moment for Goldberg, and considering how visibly thrilled he was by the reaction he got from the crowd, it’s hard to begrudge him it

puRgatoRy:
Charlotte and Sasha have a nice sit down: With Charlotte and Sasha Banks on the brink of becoming the first women to compete inside the most hellacious of cells, Raw featured sit down interviews with both of them, with Lita subbing for Michael Cole and asking the questions. It was a neat idea to get her to handle the interviewing duties, but it didn’t quite work out. She was stilted and lacklustre in the role, and it just made you appreciate that, for all his faults, Cole is at the very least a total pro. Still, I appreciate the thought, and moments of Charlotte and Sasha’s personality shone through, with the former radiating arrogance and conceit and the latter looking cool, calm and collected. While it didn’t make for utterly gripping television overall, it was a neat, subtle, restrained way to build up to Hell in a Cell.

THE wRong:
Neville vs. Bo Dallas: How about this for an absolutely bizarre booking decision? Bo Dallas beating Neville clean as a sheet in the middle of the ring? It’s hard to resent Bo picking up some momentum after a couple of years in the wilderness, but man, is this really the best WWE see in Neville? Is this the level he’s at? I know everyone’s been saying it, but it really is so strange he’s not pitched up in the cruiserweight division at all so far. He could add something to it, and the job satisfaction’s got to be better than losing to Bo bloody Dallas.

Bayley vs. Dana Brooke: This was sloppy to the point of amateurish at times. Dana Brooke is obviously not ready for the main roster, and Bayley seemed to have no idea what to do with her. What was up with that finish as well? It felt so abrupt and half hearted and looked pretty hideous, and not in the good way that reminds you of the skill and danger involved in pro wrestling, but in the way that reminds you how shit it looks when it’s done badly. Bah. Nothing good to see here.

General Cruiserweight Mundanity: It’s an absolute joy to see Drew Gulak win a match live on Raw, but the Cruiserweight division is continuing to struggle in its quest to find a worthwhile identity, and seems to be going nowhere fast. Its champion is just a guy who makes cringy puns about video games for no adequately explored reason. Most of the other wrestlers can’t even boast a personality trait as lame and insignificant as that one; they’re just faceless, undersized goons. Most jarringly, the actual broadcasting of this seemingly decent six-man tag was noticeably below par, totally chaotic and missing moves all over the place. The production team let them down this week in the same way creative are letting them down every week. Something needs to change.

THE Ridiculous:
NOTHING

The 1117th edition is over…

And after more than three years, Jack Stevenson will be stepping down and a new writer will discuss the show on a weekly basis.

Leave the memories alone…

6.5

The final score: review Average

The 411

Weird Raw. Well, a very normal Raw I suppose for most of its run time- everything from Jericho vs. Rollins to the final segment was essentially inoffensive, some of it even quite good, and some of it nothing you'd choose to watch again. But Goldberg's return was so fucking great and I was so resolutely not looking forward to it that I'm not quite sure how to grade the episode. We'll say... 6.5, but you gots to check out Goldberg. Maybe he is the man.