MayMac World Tour: It’s a Traveling Circus

*THE MAYWEATHER VS. MCGREGOR WORLD TOUR REACTION COLUMN WILL BE STARTING SOON. PLEASE STAND BY, BY WHICH I MEAN, PLEASE SIT AT YOUR COMPUTER FOR TWO HOURS FOR THE PRIMA DONNAS OF THE COMBAT SPORTS WORLD TO DECIDE THEY WANT TO SHOW UP, GROWING INCREASINGLY RESTLESS WHILE WONDERING HOW SHOWTIME COULDN’T FIND A BETTER MMA EXPERT THAN BRENDAN SCHAUB*

So speaking of MMA, anyone remember it?

Remember when MMA was a thing? Is it still a thing? It’s hard for me to tell after the entire MMA media spent a week covering a boxing fight.

I mean, yeah, it’s a boxing fight with some relevance to MMA, featuring the only simultaneous two division champion in UFC history (because he forced the UFC to do it) Conor McGregor but still. This ain’t boxing. This ain’t our sport. Our sport allows for spinning shit.

Wait, I’m sorry. I didn’t properly introduce Conor in this column. Let me try that again.

LADIES AND GENTLEMAN!!!!!

THE REIGNING……..

DEFENDING………

UNDISPUTED ONE HUNDRED AND FIFTY-FIVE POUND CHAMPION OF THE UFC………

……

*wait for it*

…………

THE NOTORIOUS….CONOR MCGREGOR!!!!!!!!!!!

Just imagine there’s a giant vein popping out of my head like Dana White’s when he says that and we’ll be all ready to go, although part of me wonders if Bruce Buffer saw Dana do that introduction and was all like “C’mon, man. Quit jacking my style.”

I really hope they end up doing a dual announcer thing for the Floyd Mayweather fight to include Bruce Buffer like they did for the Mayweather-Pacquiao fight with the other, non-Bruce Buffer. That’s mainly because I think Jimmy Lennon Jr. is an awful announcer, but I may just think that because of all the memories I have of him butchering names and other information in Strikeforce.

So yeah, the big promotional push for Mayweather vs. McGregor happened last week, with a four day, four city press tour. It served the purpose of introducing these fighters to an audience who already knew who they were, hyping up a fight that everyone is already planning to watch, making us wonder what was the point of any of this other than to produce an avalanche of news headlines that most people have already forgotten about.

I mean, the idea of doing a press junket like this wasn’t a terrible idea. What was terrible was the format they chose to conduct it in.

Do boxing press events normally do it that way, where they give a fighter a live microphone and let them say and do whatever for 15 minutes? That just seems like a bad idea, and not from a safety standpoint, but from an entertainment standpoint.

Conor has built up his name up off the controversial yet highly entertaining interviews he has given, but those interviews have always been given in a Q&A format, where he only has to talk for 20 seconds at a time, just enough to give a killer soundbite that has conviction and purpose behind it because it’s in direct response to something he’s just been asked.

Conor works great in that style. You could see it in the media scrums and actual press conferences that took place after the main speaking events were over on each day of the tour. That’s where you saw Conor at his best, whereas during the events themselves? Not so much.

Conor’s demeanor during the four stops was actually the most compelling thing about them. He managed to create a character arc for himself over the course of the four events.

There was Conor Day 1 in LA, where he was clearly unprepared for the poor attempt at a Celebrity Roast style of the event, standing up at the podium, dressed to the nines in his classic “Fuck You” couture (it’s already been suggested to me that, if I get married, I get those suits for my groomsmen, which I’m considering), saying he’s going to knock Floyd out and not much else. So, a little flustered but still feeling good.

There was Conor Day 2 in Toronto, where he was ready to bask in the light of a very warm reception, showing love for the Canadian fans as much as he criticized Showtime for allegedly cutting his mic on Day 1 or making fun of Floyd for being old and having “a small head” and not dressing professionally and having “stripper bitches” on his payroll. I know that’s something we can all relate to…He had some funny quips when Floyd was talking. Most of those quips were just variations of “Fuck you” but they were still funny in the moment.

Then came Conor Day 3 in New York, who was clearly over the whole press nonsense and wanted to be done. After two days of wearing suits, Conor didn’t even bother putting a shirt on. He then created the most controversial moment of the tour. After accusations of racism by using the words “boy” and “monkey” and telling Floyd to “dance” for him in Toronto, Conor responded that he can’t be racist because he’s black “from the belly button down.” He then did a dance for his “beautiful, black female fans.” I’m sure it was a present the fans hoped came with a gift receipt.

By Day 4 in London, it was obvious Conor just wanted to leave. He walked around the ring throwing “Fuck you’s” to whoever he made eye contact with, he patted Floyd on the head after making the same points about his age and his tax problems and the fact that he runs from “real” fights, and he was done.

Floyd’s spiel was similar throughout the four days, with his journey being highlighted by how often he yelled “YEAH!!!!!” into the microphone…

HARD WORK!

HARD WORK!

How’s the rest of that chant go anyway? Is the second part “Defraud the US Government?” “Abuse Women?” I had trouble making it out…

Oh and he also countered Conor’s racist remarks by throwing a gay slur at him in London. So that makes everything square….right?

I will give credit to Floyd for his use of the Irish flag, though. Taking it in Toronto and then walking out in New York wearing it? That’s some good heeling right there.

Honestly, if there were any good stories that came out of this tour, it was the story of Floyd’s backpack.

Seriously, what was up with that? From pulling out a small check he carries around for some reason that no one could read on Day 1 to pulling out a stack of money on Day 2 (or “about five grand,” according to Conor) to showering Conor in singles on Day 3 (making it rain on Conor to visually punctuate Floyd’s dig that Conor is just Dana’s stripper and/or “ho”), that bag showed a greater strength of character than the majority of the people who spoke.

I really want to know what Floyd was thinking with that bag. Is that a standard tactic he uses in front of the press? Did he genuinely think it would be an effective way to showcase the depth of his wealth vs. that of the Irishman’s? If he did, it didn’t work, producing some of Conor’s funniest moments from the tour.

I just hope Floyd remembers to return it to his daughter. School’s going to be back in session soon.

If the overall goal of these four days was to shut down the entire planet to get everyone to focus on and talk about this monumental clash of sports, then mission accomplished. The thoughts and opinions I’ve heard about this fight, from hardcore and casual fans, have been extremely spirited and passionate and August 26 really can’t get here soon enough.

Of course, the tour did some damage, exposing both men as racist and misogynist, rarely capable of anything more thought out than swear words and the same tired cliches to tear each other down, but it’s not going to be lasting damage. The fans love Conor so there’s little he can say right now that will turn them away and Floyd’s past has done more to tarnish his name than revealing his love of anime in the way he talks to his bodyguards ever will.

I know somebody who’s excited for the new season of Voltron: Legendary Defender…

But, for all the bad that came from these events, and all the questions about who thought this was a good idea in the first place, and the impression that Showtime may not be any better at promoting fighters than the UFC is, there’s no question about how badly the masses want to see Floyd Mayweather and Conor McGregor step inside the squared circle to answer, once and for all, who really is “The Money Fighter.”

We still have six weeks to go until the fight finally happens, but at least we have plenty of material to tide us over until then.

Also, a performance from Aloe Blacc. He’s a talented guy. I can only hope he’s talented enough to entertain everyone for five hours while we wait for Floyd and Conor to get here. Either that or we’ll be stuck with Doug E. Fresh giving us an impromptu rap history seminar again.

They’re going to be here. Any minute now. I hope…

Evan Zivin has been writing for 411 MMA since May of 2013. Evan loves the sport, and likes to takes a lighthearted look at the world of MMA in his writing…usually.