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The Man Movie Encyclopedia: X-Men: Days of Future Past

September 13, 2017 | Posted by Caliber Winfield
Hugh Jackman as Logan in X-Men: Days of Future Past

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Greetings, all.
Cripes all Friday. Your boy has been far busier than he ever anticipated. At least this time I wasn’t gone for a freaking month. However, you all have my word that I’m back to every week. No more vacations. Also, you’ll have a new e-book to check out by the time Halloween hits, so be on the look out for that.
Alright, enough chatter, let’s head to the future as well as the past, shall we?


XMenDOFP

We open up in the future, New York City, which is of course dystopian, with terrible weather. You know, when the future is a shit-show, eventually there’s nice weather. But I suppose the ruins of a major city with mutants & humans placed together like cattle for slaughter looks a bit more bleak when the sun isn’t in the middle of rocking blue sky.
We then hop over to Moscow, where a team of mutants, Kitty Pryde, Bishop, Iceman, uh…some Human Torch dude, Link, and Warpath are held up. The sentinels show up, and pretty much wreck their shit. Turns out they have the ability to adapt to any mutant ability to counteract any mutant attack. OK, so that’s when I show up with my mutant ability of a 9mm handgun and shoot them in the head.
We then head over to China, where the crew of Storm, Wolvie, Professor X and Magneto arrive to meet the crew that was just killed. Turns out Pryde sends Bishop back to the past to warn their current group of when an attack comes, so he can tell them to get out, and it erases that portion of history. Well, the big plan is for Wolverine to be sent back to 1973 to stop Mystique from killing Peter Trask, a guy who experiments on mutants, and starts the sentinel program. Simple enough. Of course, if I’m Wolverine, here’s how that scene goes

Kitty Pryde: We’re counting on you, Caliverine.
Calverine: No problem, bub.
Professor X: Don’t.
Calverine: What?
Professor X: Don’t.
Calverine: What?!
Professor X: Do you forget I can read your mind?
Calverine:….uh, I got no idea what you’re talking about.
Professor X: You’re thinking about once you go back in time aborting the mission, then going over to Gold’s Gym, Venice Beach, befriending Arnold, and becoming a bodybuilder who goes on to write Ghostbusters, Rambo: First Blood Part 2, where for some reason Rambo has a side-kick that he calls “bestie”, and Robocop. Who, also has a side-kick, this time called RoboBestie.

Calverine:….bullshit?

Well, Wolverine goes back, and wakes-up after having just sexed up some mob-guys wife/girlfriend/daughter, unsure. He makes light-work of the guys sent to hurt him, naturally, and steals their car. He gets to Professor’s place, and we find out that not only can he walk, but he’s a bit pissy. He wallows in depression, and thanks to a serum Hank made, he can walk again. However, it also means he doesn’t have his powers. At first he tells Logan to fuck off, but soon comes around, and they decide to break Magneto out of prison. First, however, they need to snag them Quicksilver, Marvel’s version of the Flash. His character is extremely well done, and interesting. They show just exactly what a kid would do with those kind of powers, and they’re dead on.
Once they get to the Pentagon, they set off the sprinklers to cause panic, allowing Quicksilver to work his magic. It’s one of the best scenes in all of comic book cinema, as Quicksilver flies around and takes out the security guards in a fantastic display of slow motion and special effects.

Meanwhile, Raven infiltrates a Vietnam Peace Treaty because she knows Trask is going to be there. He gives a presentation on his Sentinel machines, and explains that they have a censor that can detect the mutant gene. He pops it on, and it immediately goes off, detecting Raven. She starts kicking ass, and right before she can pop Trask, the gang shows up. However, Magneto is all; huh, if she dies, no war. Let’s go with that. He tries to, but misses his chance, and she gets away. Naturally, again, if I’m there…

Calverine: [sees Magneto try and kill Raven to stop the war] Huh…
Professor X: My powers are coming back. I know what you’re thinking. Stop.
Calverine: Uh…what? No, Professor…
Professor X: …who is Dexter? And why, after seeing what Eric has just done, are you thinking about killing the writer of the last season? You can’t do that. We have a mission.
Calverine: Huh? Nah…that’s..no, man. That’s you, know….I wasn’t thinking that!
Professor X: You aren’t doing that, Calverine.
Calverine: But I wasn’t! I don’t even know what Dexter is!………..I mean….I….huh….FUCK! That ending was SO terrible, Professor! They turned Dexter into a lumberjack after he drove his boat into a hurricane! I mean…c’mon, this HAS to be stopped, man!

After footage gets out of Beast, Magneto, and Raven fighting at the Vietnam Peace, Trask gets an audience with the President who allows him to start building Sentinels. Else where, Magneto has stolen some info on them, and learned all about the machines, including the fact they’re plastic. To remedy this, he boards the train that’s carrying them, and lines the machines with metal, before heading back to the Pentagon and snagging his helmet.
Now that Kitty is on the verge of death, they figure out a plan. They go and snag Rogue from the basement of the old School for Mutants, and use her to take Kitty’s place. Unfortunately, this cost Bobby his life.
Else where, Raven shows up at the school, seemingly to make peace, but when everyone is asleep, she heads downstairs and shatters Cerebro, so Charles can’t track her down. However, they figure she’ll be at the big event the next day, as that’s where Trask is going be. Bully for them, so is Magneto. He ganked himself an entire baseball stadium, sans the ground, and brought it to this announcement. He drops it at the presentation, as to be uninterrupted. He then turns on the Sentinels and lets them wreak havoc. Back in the future, the Sentinels do their best to kill the remaining mutants, and begin to succeed, but not without a fight, first.
Magneto finally comes face to face with the President and his men, and is set to put them down, on live TV, to boot. He gives a speech about how they’re right, they are the ones to fear, because they can do some serious damage. Before he can do the deed, Mystique puts a plastic bullet through part of his neck and knocks him out. She decides not to finish the job with Trask, and as a result, it erases the future.
Wolverine wakes up at the school, and discovers everyone is still alive, including Jean & Cyclops. Which I think was his jab at Rattner, as it erased X-Men III. Thank goodness. Wolverine speaks to the Professor, who’s like “Uuh, yeah, I got some details to fill you in on. History was changed, and at the end of the 6th Sense, this time he’s actually still alive. What a twist.”

MAN MOVIE ENCYCLOPEDIA TALLY
1-Liners:
Guys Beat Up: 1111111111111111
Guys Killed: 111111
Swear Words: 11111
Explosions: 1
Chases: 1
Broken Bones: 1
Fight at a Motel? No
Guy Get Girl? No
Guy Smoke Cigarettes? No

MAN-FACTS:
Originally, the man who played the young William Striker was slated to play a young Juggernaut. But once that role was scrapped, he took this.
Quicksilver’s scene was filmed with practical effects. High speed photography and stunt rigs. The only CGI was used for the objects in the air.
Basically, to streamline a lot of things, much was forgotten from previous X-Men and X-Men related films. Which, ironically, keeps in canon with how the X-Men film timeline is atrocious.

C’MON BENNETT, LET’S PARTY!:
X-Men First Class is arguably my favorite comic book film, and I thought there was no way that they’d be able to match-up with a sequel. But Singer went and absolutely delivered a film that’s every bit as good as it’s predecessor, if not better. Days of Future Best is everything that’s right with the golden era, fantastic story carried out by stellar acting, characters, and action. It’s great seeing both eras, the desolate future, and the bright & vivid past. Honestly, I don’t even get why they made a Rogue cut though. She’s barely in the film, and it just seems like she was shoe-horned in there for the sake of it. Regardless, this is a master class on comic book film making, and one of Marvel’s best.
5 Head-Butts Out Of 5.

Any questions, comments, drunk-ramblings, feel free to send them my way, I always dig hearing from you, the beautiful people.
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