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The Gratuitous B-Movie Column 7.16.12 Issue #216: The President’s Man: A Line in the Sand (2002)

July 16, 2012 | Posted by Bryan Kristopowitz

The Gratuitous B-Movie Column Issue #216: The President’s Man: A Line in the Sand (2002)

July: A Month of Chuck Norris: Week 3

Hello, everyone, and welcome once again to the internets movie review column that has never had to fight off a giant lizard for the last slice of pizza, The Gratuitous B-Movie Column, and I am your host Bryan Kristopowitz. In this issue, issue number two hundred and sixteen, July: A Month of Chuck Norris continues with the sequel to The President’s Man, The President’s Man: A Line in the Sand, a 2002 TV movie completely directed by Eric Norris.

The President’s Man: A Line in the Sand (2002)

The President’s Man: A Line in the Sand, also known as The President’s Man 2: Ground Zero, among other titles (go here for what, I assume, is a complete list), is the direct sequel to the 2000 TV movie The President’s Man (I reviewed that flick here). Chuck Norris is back as super bad ass secret agent Joshua McCord, and Jennifer Tung is back as McCord’s uber hot daughter and handler Que. However, replacing Dylan Neal as the new President’s Man Deke Slater is Judson Mills, and there’s a new President of the United States, Adam Mayfield, portrayed by the great Robert Urich in one of his last acting roles. The movie starts off with Mills’ Slater on a mission in “West Africa,” taking out some bad guys with nuclear weapons ambitions. We see Slater take out five bad guys single-handedly, then hop on a bad ass dirt bike and outrun a massive explosion before jumping onto a waiting helicopter where Norris’ McCord is, I guess, watching all of the action. I don’t quite understand why McCord is still involved in missions as I thought, at the end of The President’s Man, he finally quit and Slater officially took over. I guess you have to assume, since the movie never addresses it, that while Slater is technically the new President’s Man, McCord hasn’t completely quit as Slater still needs his help and expertise. Perhaps there’s some sort of waiting period that has to be observed before absolutely everything involved in the switchover is official and McCord gets to pick and choose which missions he wants to do because of an unofficial official seniority clause. That’s the most plausible explanation I can come up with.

After the West Africa mission is completed, McCord and Slater are brought back into action after President Mayfield is briefed on Abdul Rashid (Joel Swetow), a fanatical Arab Muslim terrorist who may have been involved in the first attack on the World Trade Center (he actually sends a video to President Mayfield demanding the release of the WTC bomber). The Pentagon has actionable intelligence on Rashid’s whereabouts in Afghanistan and wants to capture and interrogate him regarding missing Russian plutonium. The Pentagon believes that Rashid’s followers have the missing plutonium and have somehow smuggled it into the United States to eventually use on the American mainland. So President Mayfield calls in Slater, and Slater goes to Afghanistan to capture Rashid. The mission isn’t easy, as Rashid’s henchmen are tough and vigilant (they’re also still on a bit of a combat high as they managed to take down an American fighter jet with a missile earlier in the movie). But Slater doesn’t fail and captures Rashid and gets him back to America to be questioned.

The movie then starts to wander around a bit as we see Slater go through several training scenes with both McCord and Que and Rashid communicate via special video to his son, Abir (Ali Afshar), who runs an electronics store in Chicago and who is the point man for Rashid’s big “attack on America” scheme. Abir does have the missing Russian plutonium (it was smuggled into America via an art museum in Chicago) and is just waiting for the word to attack. The story doesn’t pick up again until the last quarter or so, when Abir finally initiates his big plan, which turns out to be slightly different from his father’s big scheme, and McCord and Slater get around to investigating the situation and figure out what the Rashids are up to.

It’d odd to me that a movie with an actual plot doesn’t fare as well as a movie without one, but that’s what happens here with A Line in the Sand. The first third is excellent and the last, more or less, third is decent, but that middle part is where the movie drags and loses all kinds of momentum. And why aren’t Slater and Que a couple? They have good chemistry together but for whatever reason the movie never pulls the trigger on it. The movie doesn’t even try to do the “I like her but her father is my boss and he could kill me with his pinkie finger” thing, a serious missed opportunity.

What’s likely to surprise everyone, especially now considering Chuck’s uber right wing Christianity, is how relatively tolerant the movie is towards its evil Arab Muslim terrorist villains. Norris’ McCord even gives a big speech, while doing his college professor thing, about how you can’t paint all Arabs and Muslims as evil because of the actions of a few fanatics and that tolerance, understanding, and brotherhood are far more important than getting revenge and whatnot. This particular movie debuted on CBS television a few months after 9/11, in January 2002, and could have easily been all about “getting those Muslim bastards.” But 9/11 isn’t mentioned once, and the movie doesn’t condemn anyone’s religion. Rashid is just a bad guy that needs to be stopped. That’s it. Truly inspiring.

Norris does his usual kick ass job as McCord. He doesn’t have as much to do as in the first movie, but he still rocks every scene he’s in. He still reads books by the fireplace in his spare time, still teaches whatever the hell he teaches in college, and still continues to train Slater in the fine art of being the President’s Man. I just wish there was more of an explanation as to why he’s still hanging around when he said in the first movie that he wanted out. Why didn’t the script call for McCord to be brought out of retirement to take out Rashid or something like that? At least then the movie would have an explanation for McCord’s presence. Maybe have him rescue Slater in the opening action scene and then have him stick around to continue teaching? The lack of an explanation really bothers me, man. It does.

Judson Mills, who apparently was a cast member on Norris’ Walker, Texas Ranger show when this movie premiered, does a decent job as Slater. He isn’t quite as good cockiness wise as Neal in the first movie, but he’s a much better smart ass. Mills is also a little smoother in the flick’s action scenes, and he also manages to make outrunning a fake background explosion while riding a dirt bike seem not as ridiculous as it sounds. Jennifer Tung is once again outstanding as Que, McCord’s daughter and handler. It would have been nice to see her on a mission kicking ass, but the bits where she helps continue Slater’s training are fun. I just wish I knew why she didn’t get together with Slater, It seems like a natural story avenue to explore. Perhaps the moviemakers were saving that for a third movie?

Joel Swetow does a good job as terrorist mastermind Abdul Rashid. He doesn’t play the character as a complete, raging psycho but instead gives him a quiet confidence that’s unsettling once you realize what he’s willing to do and what he’s willing to make other people do to further his own sick agenda. Ali Afshar as Abir Rashid isn’t quite as scary as Swetow’s Abdul, but his big plan at the end of the movie is so goddamn reckless and insane you can’t wait to see him wiped out.

And then there’s Robert Urich as President Adam Mayfield. Urich does his usual amazing job, but you wish there was a little more for him to do. There’s way too much going on with this chief of staff and attorney general and head of the CIA, none of it interesting in the least. I know that the President isn’t supposed to know who his “man” is, but it would have been cool to see Norris and Urich together in at least one scene. It, no doubt, would have been epic.

The President’s Man: A Line in the Sand was the last TPM movie, which is a damn shame. I’m going to assume that the movie didn’t hit a high enough rating, or CBS was in the beginning of its purge of the “TV-movie-of-the-week” programming scheme. You’d think someone on cable would have wanted to do another one. I mean, this movie, along with Walker, Texas Ranger reruns were on all the time on USA not that long ago. Cable networks don’t air movies or programs that don’t draw some kind of audience. Why couldn’t USA work out a deal to get The President’s Man band back together? It’s a damn shame. I think the world could stand another The President’s Man movie.

See The President’s Man: A Line in the Sand as soon as you can. It’s not as good as the first TPM, but it’s still pretty dang decent. Definitely worth your time.

So what do we have here?

Dead bodies: 20+

Explosions: At least seven.

Nudity?: None. It’s a broadcast TV movie.

Doobage:A bad ass bald eagle, an American flag, nuclear bomb rescuing, major hand-to-hand combat, dirt bike riding, a massive explosion, slow motion jump over an armed jeep, slow motion dirt bike crash into the ocean, baseball practice, a list of terrorist atrocities, infiltrating a museum, plutonium removal, people accidentally setting off an alarm, a hot model babe, a ball shooter training sequence, ball catching, bomb building, praying, video making, low budget animation explaining what would happen if a nuclear bomb was detonated in Washington D.C., stock footage of fighter jets flying off an aircraft carrier, more praying, people playing chess, bomb dropping, several massive explosions, exploding fighter jet, an explanation on how music works, guy being dropped off by a Stealth Bomber, stock footage of a “satellite in space,” more low budget CGI animation, a wicked kick to the face, an obvious rubber knife, more chess playing, walking through the desert, jet pack hooey, stock footage of a submarine, an interesting interrogation, a discussion about what the Koran really means and what religious tolerance is all about, a karate training scene, a flag on a chain, a Dallas oil refinery, tea drinking, “satellite surveillance footage,” slow motion leaping over a fence topped with barbed wire, sleeper choke hold, double kicking a fat guy, a barrel avalanche, shooting a guy in mid-air after doing a flip, nuke disarming, exploding gas tank, a great man-on-fire gag, a massive side kick, rocket attack with two exploding cars, fed killing, two final fights, a slow motion overhead throw, a Presidential address to the nation, even more chess playing, and an unsatisfying ending.

Kim Richards?: Sort of implied but nothing explicit.

Gratuitous:Bald eagle, the American flag, “West Africa,” dirt bike riding, slow motion jump over an armed jeep, Chuck Norris, Chuck Norris in a helicopter, Robert Urich, Robert Urich as the President of the United States, Chuck Norris as a college professor, a list of terrorist atrocities, chess playing, Afghanistan, Chicago, stolen Russian plutonium, “Southern Afghanistan,” Texas Senator Kay Bailey Hutchison, Thom Barry, people praying, stock footage of fighter jets taking off from an aircraft carrier, Chuck Norris explaining how music works, an obvious rubber knife, people using jet packs, stock footage of a submarine, Dallas, an evil consumer electronics store, an oil refinery in Dallas, Chuck Norris drinking tea, slow motion leaping over a fence topped with barbed wire, a barrel avalanche, Chuck Norris flipping and then shooting a guy in mid-air, nuke disarming, rocket attack with two exploding cars, fed killing, two final fights, a slow motion overhead throw, a Presidential address to the nation, and an unsatisfying ending.

Best lines: “I’ve never been one to categorize the press as a pack of hounds but they sure do eat like one,” “Are you telling me Rashid has the bomb?,” “What, no date tonight?,” “Is that supposed to impress me?,” “We have the plutonium!,” “It’s getting too easy!,” “Now that you can’t see, you’re going to have to rely on your other senses,” “Concentrate with your mind’s eye, Deke,” “Couldn’t you get softer balls?,” “Deke, I’ve been doing that since I was five,” “Americans. They are very good at training their enemies to destroy them,” “Death to American Imperialists!,” “There’s no one here. You’re right on top of him!,” “What does your President want?,” “Allah protects the righteous,” “I said you did a really good job, Deke,” “Rashid wants to be remembered as a martyr. He plans on dying in the explosion,” “You’re going to Chicago. Chicago?,” “Sometimes I can be too much of a perfectionist,” “Let’s go find the bomb,” “No smoking!,” “Sorry to disappoint you, Rashid, but your nuclear device has been disarmed,” “We have another mission,” and “This is going to be a cold one, isn’t it? Just think of Barbara. She’ll keep you warm.”

Rating: 7.5/10.0

Next week: Walker, Texas Ranger: Trial by Fire


The Gratuitous B-Movie Column: The Facebook Page!

Please check out The Gratuitous B-Movie Column Facebook page, which can be seen here. There’s not much there at the moment, but, as time goes by, expect to see daily questions and musings and other B-movie hooey. And it would be cool if you “liked” it, too.

The Gratuitous B-Movie Column Facebook page! Yeah!


And now, a Chuck Norris Fact

Chuck Norris can literally kill time.


Things to Watch Out For This Week: Part 1

Lockout: You can check out my review of this biggish budget sci-fi action flick here. I thought it was a great time at the movies, and, hopefully, it’s the first of many Snow adventures. I think Guy Pearce deserves an international sci-fi action movie franchise. I know I’d see all of them.

The 3 Stooges: The Movie: I missed this comedy when it came out and I’m still a little annoyed with myself. I’m a Stooges nerd and really wanted to see if the Farrelly brothers and the cast managed to capture the essence of the Stooges. I’ve heard good things and I’ve heard bad things. Now that the movie is out on DVD, I’m going to make a major effort to see this as soon as I can. Nyuk, nyuk, nyuk. Ha.

Get the Gringo: I’m assuming that the reason this bad ass action flick starring the Mel Gibson didn’t get a major theatrical release because, well, it stars Mel Gibson. He’s still a bit pf pariah. Hopefully for Mel’s sake his upcoming villain in the Machete sequel returns him to his former glory and his movies don’t get dumped quickly. Didn’t Get the Gringo premiere on DirecTV or something?

American Masters: Johnny Carson: The King of Late-Night: I missed this PBS documentary when it first aired. I tried recording it, but for whatever reason my fucking DVR decided I didn’t need to see it. Now that the documentary is on DVD, I’d like to see my fucking DVR try to stop me now. Asshole.

Girls Gone Dead: Unrated and Exposed: This low budget slasher flick features pro wrestling legend Jerry “The King” Lawler, Beetlejuice (the guy from Howard Stern), Ron Jeremy, Linnea Quigley, and someone named “Sal the Stockbroker.” I like the trailer, but, to me, with the title Girls Gone Dead, shouldn’t this be a zombie movie?


TV Quick Hits

XIII thoughts: This “new to America” action series, based on a Belgian comic book or something, is currently airing on the Reelz Channel Friday nights and stars Stuart Townsend as an amnesiac super soldier on the run from the U.S. government. I’ve seen the first two episodes, and I have to say they were both pretty decent. I’m not sure I quite understand what the hell is going on, but I like the show so far.

I know that Stephen Dorff and Val Kilmer starred in a miniseries a few years ago based on the same source material. I haven’t watched it yet (it’s in the stack of movies I taped off TV, sort of near the middle) but, is the show itself a kind of continuation of the mini-series featuring the same people, or is the show a whole new thing? Anyone out there know?

The action scenes are pretty slick for a TV show. And the cast is better than I thought it would be. I just wish I knew what the hell was going on. Why is the former President of the United States pulling strings and exerting influence over people when he, well, isn’t the President anymore? And what exactly is this big conspiracy about? Why was it necessary to create a series of soldiers with roman numeral tattoos on their bodies? And why is the big mission/program they were created by so dang secret?

I’m kind of surprised that CBS didn’t want this show to air during the summer. Or NBC. I mean, this Canadian show is way better than that hospital show Saving Hope. Why not opt for something people might want to watch?

Stuart Townsend kicks ass on this show. I can’t wait to see how the first season works out. Am I building myself up for a major letdown? Canadian readers help me out.

Am I the only one who thinks Tom Cruise is getting a bit of a raw deal in the media at the moment?: Tom Cruise’s divorce is the scandal sheet gossip story of the moment, and it’s become very difficult to avoid it. Damn near every day since it was announced that his now former wife Katie Holmes had filed for divorce it’s been a non-stop attack on Cruise and his weird beard Scientology religion, believed to be the reason for the big break up. Cruise went from A-list Hollywood star to professional weirdo within hours. Is what’s happening to big Tom, well, fair?

As far as I know, we don’t know the real reason for Holmes and Cruise breaking up. All signs seem to point to it having something to do with Scientology, but there’s a chance the divorce is actually about something else. I’m sure we’ll never know the real truth because of confidentiality agreements and whatnot. But, if this divorce really is all about Cruise’s religion, why is it okay for “TomKat’s” kid Suri to be indoctrinated into the Catholic religion? Why is that necessarily “safer” than being indoctrinated into Scientology?

And why are we supposed to suddenly feel sorry for Katie Holmes? Did she not know what she was getting into when she married Cruise? How could she not be aware of Cruise’s beliefs? And, again, why is it better for her daughter Suri to be “raised” within the confines of the Catholic Church? Am I missing something here?


The Gratuitous B-Movie Column B-Movie Theme of the Week



And now, the weekly Fearnet update

Fearnet, the only free all horror/thriller On Demand TV network features uncut, uncensored horror flicks from the past and present 24 hours a day, seven days a week, pretty much any time you freaking want them (as long as you still have power, that is). The channel also has behind-the-scenes stuff, trailers, and other cool hooey for you to check out. Check your local cable listings for availability (According to the Fearnetwebsite more and more Time Warner and Cox Cable areas are getting the channel. Be sure to go here to see if Fearnet is coming to your area).

Fearnet also exists as a regular old TV channel. This Fearnet airs horror movies roughly twenty one hours a day (there is a block of infomercials in the morning, usually from 6-9am est). The movies shown do have “commercial breaks” in them, similar to the breaks that currently appear on IFC, but the movies are uncut (blood and boobs and cursing are all intact).

Fearnet’s website,, offers free movies, interviews, news, and other behind-the-scenes horror movie nerd stuff, too. Both William Lustig’s insane Maniac starring the great Joe Spinell and George A. Romero’s slasher flick (and that’s what it is, a goddamn slasher movie. I don’t give a flying hooey what Romero claims otherwise) Bruiser were on the site last week. Are they still there? Check and see).

The website also features Post Mortem with Mick Garris, a nifty interview show where big, fat Stephen King’s favorite director talks with genre legends like John Carpenter, Wes Craven, Roger Corman, and others. It’s definitely worth your time.

If you’re a Facebook nerd (and, really, today, who isn’t?) you can check out the Fearnet fans Facebook page, which can be seen here. There are plenty of people out there interested in Fearnet. Join them. And, as always, thanks to both Mark Lindsey and Mathew Hirsch for info regarding the Fearnet fan movement.


The Gratuitous B-Movie Column B-Movie Babe of the Week: Michelle Rodriguez


And now, another Chuck Norris Fact

Chuck Norris can freeze lava with a lit match.


Things to Watch Out For This Week: Part 2

4:44: Last Day on Earth: This end of the world thriller/drama is from the great director Abel Ferrara, the man who gave us The Driller Killer, King of New York, Bad Lieutenant, and, of course, Ms. 45. 4:44 didn’t get great reviews, but I bet it’s plenty interesting anyway. Definitely worth checking out.

Doomsday Prophecy: This is apparently yet another mega low budget end of the world movie from the fine folks at the Sci Fi Channel. The trailer is kind of neat, so at least it has that going for it.

Intruders: I’ve heard good things and I’ve hard bad things about this horror flick starring Clive Owen. I’m kind of surprised it didn’t get a wider release when it played in theatres. Owen is a biggish star. Anyone out there see this? Is this really worth checking out?

Goldberg-P.I.: Jackie Mason as a P.I.? Why the hell didn’t anyone think of doing this before now? I mean, shouldn’t we already be like five movies and a short-lived TV series into this franchise?


The Gratuitous B-Movie Column Douchebag of the Week


This week, The Gratuitous B-Movie Column Douchebag of the Week goes to the U.S. House of Representatives, for voting to repeal the Affordable Care Act, also known as Obamacare, for a 33rd time, knowing full well that it won’t get through the Senate. Instead of working on legislation that has a chance to pass both houses of Congress, the Republican led House apparently felt the need to draw yet another line in the sand and show everyone who supports and who doesn’t support President Obama’s health care law, like we all didn’t fucking know. If Obama wins a second term and the House stays with the Republican party, we’re going to see more of this kind of shit until the next election in 2014, and then likely again in 2016. Is this what the American people really want? Is this what they keep voting for? Should this award actually go to the American voter?

I guess we’ll find out in a few months. Fucking assholes.

And then there’s former Massachusetts Governor and 2012 Republican Presidential candidate Willard “Mitt” Romney, for whining about President Obama’s recent attacks on his time at Bain Capital. Willard has actually called for the President to apologize for “attacks that are beneath the office of the President.” Thankfully, the President’s campaign hasn’t apologized (it would be better if the campaign put out a five word press release “Mitt Romney can suck cock,” but that would probably be seen as uncouth), and hopefully the campaign never does. Romney has a lot of nerve demanding an apology when his campaign and its acolytes in the right wing media have been relentlessly attacking the President 24/7 for the last year, calling him “stupid,” “unprepared,” “in over his head,” “incompetent,” etc. Romney’s campaign has every right to say those things, sure, but the campaign can’t get all offended when its opposition hits back. That’s just bullshit.

And hasn’t Romney been touting his experience as a “successful businessman” since the start of the Republican primary? Hasn’t that been his thing? Why shouldn’t he be criticized if his experience isn’t as squeaky clean and triumphant as he’s made it out to be? Isn’t this politics?

Jesus Christ.

And finally there’s country music legend and ultra right wing psychopath Hank Williams, Jr., for his recent Rolling Stone magazine interview to promote his new album where he basically confirms that he doesn’t know what the hell he’s talking about but he believes what he believes anyway. You can go here for the interview. It’s one of the most disgraceful things I think I’ve ever read. And, no, old Bocephus doesn’t get any credit for admitting to the world that he doesn’t know what the fuck he’s talking about. Where’s Laura Ingraham when we need her to say “Just shut up and sing?”



NASCAR and Indycar thoughts

At the start of the NASCAR Sprint Cup race at New Hampshire Motor Speedway yesterday it looked like it would pole sitter Kyle Busch’s day. Busch had the car to beat, jumping out front from the drop of the green flag and holding off any and all challengers. But then something happened in the pits and then again later on and he was done, never getting back what he had at the start of the race. Busch’s teammate Denny Hamlin then became the man to beat and pretty much had the field covered. But then Hamlin had a miscommunication with his crew chief and ended up losing major track position. Eventual winner Kasey Kahne probably wouldn’t have won the race had there been a late race caution as Hamlin, pissed off about his pit miscommunication, was roaring through the field. But Kahne won, his second race victory of the year. Kahne is now a Chase “Wild Card” contender with those two wins. Hooray for him.

Clint Bowyer had a pretty decent day, coming home third. Dale Earnhardt, Jr. was in the hunt the whole race and ended up fourth. Nationwide race winner Brad Keselowski finished fifth. Jimmie Johnson, who finished seventh, was upset about a caution that apparently ruined his team’s race strategy or something. He said after the race that he was going to keep his mouth shut, presumably because he didn’t want to get in trouble with NASCAR. What the hell was he so mad about?

I was surprised at how racy New Hampshire was. It can be hard to pass at times because the 1-mile oval is flat, but it seemed like drivers could get hooked up on the outside, stay there through the corner, and then pass. I was also surprised at how empty the grandstands looked. Granted, just about every race this year has had an attendance problem, but I don’t think I’ve ever seen New Hampshire so sparsely attended. There were probably eighty thousand people there, but, much like Indianapolis, one hundred and twenty thousand people, while still a huge crowd, looks small based on the track’s overall seating. It’ll be interesting to see if the next race at New Hampshire, the second race in the Chase, will have a bigger crowd.

Sprint Cup is off this week, but the Nationwide and Camping World Trucks Series will be racing at Chicagoland Speedway on Saturday night (Trucks) and Sunday afternoon (Nationwide). Will Kevin Harvick decide to race and complain about another female driver?

Nothing new on the AJ Allmendinger front. Roger Penske has said several times since the suspension was announced that he and the team supported Allmendinger and supported NASCAR’s drug testing policy, so, if Allmendinger’s “B” sample is tested and comes back “negative” then Allmendinger will be employed until the end of the year. Probably. I have serious doubts on Allmendinger’s overall future at Penske as I’m sure the #22 team’s sponsors don’t want to be associated with someone who “may” have done drugs. It’s sad. And I just want to say that Brad Keselowski’s recent remarks at a NASCAR press conference about the need for drug tests, where he said that drivers “shouldn’t be allowed to take anything, not even Flintstones pills” and “that everyone should just man up and drive the damn race car,” is incredibly fucking stupid. Is he saying that if his personal doctor tells him that he needs to take prescription medication for high blood pressure or an allergy he’s going to quit? Give me a break. Brad, you’re a good race car driver, you’ve shown that you can win and you’re a legitimate championship contender. Please don’t try to look tough and whatnot because you look like you’re still fifteen. You just end up looking ridiculous. And you should support your teammate until all the facts are out. That’s just being polite.

Not much going on in Indycar at the moment. Apparently the series is going to increase the “push-to-Pass” boost thing for this weekend’s race in Edmonton, something I’m supposed to be excited about but I’m just not. I didn’t like PTP in Champ Car and I don’t like it now. I just don’t see the point.

All eyes will be on Ryan Hunter-Reay as he tries to win four races in a row this Sunday. Edmonton is usually pretty awful, but with the streak he’s on I’d say he has a pretty good chance of winning. The Penske cars don’t seem to be up to snuff lately, including team leader Will Power. Power is second in points and needs a good race to keep pace with Hunter-Reay. Power’s teammate tax cheat Helio Castroneves is third but really needs some luck to get him over the hump. Over on the Ganassi side, Scott Dixon is really the only one with a realistic chance of winning the title. Indy 500 winner Dario Franchitti is basically done for the season. The same goes for Graham Rahal.

There has been more and more talk of Fisher-Hartman driver Josef Newgarden maybe going to Penske next year. I guess, in that scenario, Ryan Briscoe is thrown under the bus and removed from the team and replaced with Newgarden. Of course, there’s a chance that Penske could run a fourth team, but then that would depend on finding a willing sponsor and there aren’t that many out there. And then what happens to Briscoe? Does he do a Dan Wheldon and take some time off so he can find a good ride or does Briscoe take whatever he’s offered? Will Briscoe go to Jay Penske’s team and replace Katherine Legge or does Briscoe go sports car racing?

I am not looking forward to this weekend’s race. The race organizers in Edmonton really have to find a better track configuration. The track they have now just blows.

Congratulations to Sammy Swindell for winning his third King’s Royal at Eldora Speedway. You can check out the race report here. Swindell almost won the $50,000 to win event last year but blew a tire on the last lap. What a difference a year makes, right?


And now, easily one of the greatest videos in the history of youtube


Once again, a Chuck Norris Fact

Chuck Norris doesn’t have good aim. His bullets just know better than to miss.


Well, I think that’ll be about it for this issue. B-movies rule, always remember that.

If there’s anything you want to see reviewed here in this column, feel free to offer a comment below or send me an e-mail. I’m always on the lookout for new stuff to watch.

And don’t forget to bookmark 411 via the little line below. You’ll be glad you did.

The President’s Man: A Line in the Sand

Chuck Norris– Joshua McCord
Judson Mills– Deke Slater
Jennifer Tung– Que McCord
Robert Urich– President Adam Mayfield
Joel Swetow– Abdul Rashid
Ali Afshar/Alex Dodd– Abir Rashid
Thom Barry– General Gates
Roxanne Hart– Lydia Mayfield
Kay Bailey Hutchison– Senator Kay Bailey Hutchison

Directed by Eric Norris
Screenplay by John Lansing and Bruce Cervi, based on characters created by Bob Gookin

Distributed by CBS and Echo Bridge Home Entertainment

Runtime– 90 minutes

Buy it here

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Bryan Kristopowitz