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100 Percent Fordified: CHIKARA Aniversario: A New Attitude

July 2, 2015 | Posted by Kevin Ford
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100 Percent Fordified: CHIKARA Aniversario: A New Attitude  

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Easton, PA – 5.24.2015

Championship Rundown
Grand Champion: Hallowicked
Campeones de Parejas: The Devastation Corporation (Max Smashmaster & Blaster McMassive)
Young Lions Cup Champion: Heidi Lovelace

Commentary is provided by Mike Quackenbush, Gavin Loudspeaker, Bryce Remsburg, Leonard F. Chikarason, Jonathan Barber, and Juan Francisco de Coronado.

N_R_G are backstage. Race Jaxon is excited to be in Easton, despite just coming off of a very long three day trip. Rockwell looks tired, but Jaxon firmly states that Rockwell’s exhaustion is what cost them the tag titles and he won’t stand for it. He has confidence that Rockwell can get it together and help him accrue three points in tonight’s elimination bout. Rockwell doesn’t seem so confident.

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Elimination Match
Silver Ant & Frightmare vs. Amasis & Worker Ant vs. N_R_G (Race Jaxon & Hype Rockwell) vs. Kevin Condron & Lucas Calhoun

Calhoun is the former Volgar, who unmasked at Condron’s suggestion last night. The Lithuanian Snow Troll is in Condron and Calhoun’s corner. Frightmare sends Calhoun outside. Rockwell tires himself out with jabs to Frightmare. He gets sleepy as he has Frightmare in a sleeper hold. He goes for the Hyperwheel, but Frightmare escapes and sends Rockwell out with the Deja Vu. He follows with a suicide dive. Calhoun does a little dancing with Jaxon before putting on a headlock. Jaxon ducks the boot and takes over Calhoun with a Frankensteiner. He lands a suicide dive of his own. Condron avoids locking up with Amasis. Amasis grabs a side headlock and headscissors Condron to the ropes. The Funky Pharaoh snaps off a pair of armdrags before dropkicking Condron. Condron slaps Amasis as he rolls to the floor. Silver Ant comes in, and Amasis tags in Worker Ant. They trade holds, ultimately reaching a stalemate. Frightmare wants to see Silver Ant go after Worker Ant. This builds his ire. Worker Ant ducks a clothesline. Silver Ant gets in some chops after breaking a lock-up. Worker Ant boots him down. Silver Ant catches Worker Ant with a tiger feint kick but misses a top rope double stomp. Jaxon back elbows Silver Ant. Jaxon pulls Silver Ant off the second rope, but mid-air Silver Ant turns his offensive maneuver into a DDT. He and Frightmare work over Jaxon in their corner. Silver Ant misses a frog splash. Jaxon superkicks him and tags in Amasis. He and Calhoun trade blows. Worker Ant assists Amasis with a tornado DDT. Amasis ducks some attacks from Frightmare and tope con hilo’s onto Condron and Calhoun on the floor. Frightmare stomps on Calhoun and yells at Silver Ant. Condron drags Frightmare to the floor. The Snow Troll distracts Silver Ant. Silver Ant headbutts him away. Calhoun catches Silver Ant coming off the top with a Samoan Drop. Condron, wanting the credit for himself, stops Calhoun’s pin and DDT’s Silver Ant for the pin and elimination at 11:13. Worker Ant and Amasis double team Condron, even hitting the Ants Marching double dropkick. Troll breaks Worker Ant’s pin as Calhoun knocks Amasis off the apron. Calhoun drops Worker Ant with the Rikishi Driver. Again, Condron stops Calhoun from pinning Worker Ant and gets the pin for himself at 12:26. The Troll brings an energy drink can into the ring to use as a foreign object. Race grabs the drink and hands into Rockwell. The drink wakes him up! N_R_G double flapjack Condron. They hit Calhoun with stereo dropkicks to the side of his head. Jaxon disposes of the Snow Troll as Rockwell takes care of Condron with the Hyperwheel. A superkick from Jaxon earns N_R_G the pin at 13:57. That energy drink spot was awesome. I really like what they’re doing with Condron, and Calhoun’s character is such a massive step up for Volgar that improvement is all but certain. The wrestling and story in this match were both good, making for a fun and entertaining way to kick off the show. ***

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Challenge of the Immortals
Dasher’s Dugout (The Throwbacks (Dasher Hatfield & ‘Mr. Touchdown’ Mark Angelosetti), Icarus & Heidi Lovelace) vs. The United Nations (Juan Francisco de Coronado & The Bloc Party (The Proletariat Boar of Moldova, Mr. Azerbaijan & Prakash Sabar))

Boar does not want to wrestle Lovelace. She pulls him by the tail and back handsprings into a quesadora armdrag. After a headbutt from the apron, she comes off the top rope with an alita, following up with a satellite headscissors. Sabar comes in and Lovelace grabs a wristlock. Hatfield tags in and takes over. Sabar goes to the eyes and grabs a side headlock. Hatfield armdrags Sabar twice before taking him over with a double knuckle lock. He grabs a courting hold, turning it into an armdrag and a seatbelt pin for two. He peppers Sabar with punches to the stomach. Sabar armdrags him to the corner but Hatfield does a headstand. Hatfield uses his feet to send Sabar outside. Coronado joins Sabar on the floor. Hatfield baseball slide dropkicks them both. Icarus and Azerbaijan enter. Azerbaijan is proud of his kick to the stomach. Icarus resists his running shoulder block, but the second time Azerbaijan gets him down. Icarus chops him in response. He and Corondo try a double suplex. Icarus slides out and tags in Angelosetti, who comes off the top with a double shoulder tackle. Coronado eye rakes Angelosetti, but Angelosetti takes him over with a backdrop. He takes down Coronado with a Rough Ryder for two. Coronado avoids a gorilla press slam and a corner shoulder block. Angelosetti armdrags him off the second rope. The Bloc Party attack Angelosetti. The rest of Dasher’s Dugout send them to the corner with triple shoulder blocks. Azerbaijan shoulder blocks Sabar and the Boar. Coronado stops his shoulder block to Azerbaijan with a lariat. Icarus comes in. Coronado whips him to the ropes where Sabar kicks him. Icarus spears Sabar off the apron. He tries an O’Connor Roll. Coronado kicks out and the Boar snaps Icarus’ head across the top rope. Icarus is beaten down for a bit, but finds the time to roll outside. Angelosetti jumps in but is cut off quickly with a dropkick from Coronado. He finds himself trapped Hatfield uses his body to avoid a whip to the corner from Boar. Hatfield comes in with a crossbody to Boar. Boar however passes off Hatfield to Azerbaijan for a release side slam. The United Nations all get in offense on Hatfield, but Hatfield is able to fight back and Jackhammer the Boar. Icarus is cut off upon being tagged in and Azerbaijan tosses him out. Sabar tosses Angelosetti out. Azerbaijan shoves Lovelace to the corner. Coronado misses a running shoulder block and Lovelace double clotheslines Sabar and Azerbaijan. Boar powerslams her for two. Boar gives her a sidewalk slam for two. Lovelace blocks a lungblower from Coronado and tags in Icarus. He dropkicks Boar and hip tosses Sabar. He gets two with the Michinoku Driver on Sabar. He suplexes Boar twice. Sabar cuts off his third attempt. An eight person suplex chain forms which nobody wins. The United Nations dispose of the Throwbacks and Icarus. Coronado and Sabar hold Lovelace for the Boar. She gets her feet up to block a Gore, fights off Sabar and Coronado, then sends Azerbaijan out with a headscissors. She delivers many corner forearms to Coronado and Sabar. Coronado sends her face first into the second turnbuckle. Sabar misses the Bronco Buster. Coronado ascends the ropes. Lovelace crotches him on the top rope and nails an enzuigiri. Coronado rakes her eyes and snaps her face first on the top rope. The Boar hits her with the Gore for the pin at 16:32. Awkward suplex spot aside this was good. The United Nations looked strong and Heidi threw a monkey wrench into the otherwise sound group of Dasher’s Dugout; a good story to tell. The wrestling was also solid, and it set up the Boar for a Young Lions Cup shot in the future. ***

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Oleg the Usurper vs. Missile Assault Ant

Sidney Bakabella is in Oleg’s corner, parading around his contract as they enter the building. Oleg side steps an attack from Missile, sending Missile to the floor. As Oleg is posing to the fans, Missile comes in with a Jon Woo dropkick. He gives Oleg the Missile stomp. Missile drives his shoulder repeatedly into Oleg’s mid-section, then snapmares him back into the Missile stomp. They each throws some blows, but Missile gets the better of the exchange with an uppercut. He pulls off a Northern Lights suplex. Oleg muscles him into a backbreaker. Missile drops down the top rope to send Oleg to the apron and clotheslines him to the floor. Oleg tries a comeback, but ends up chipping the ring post. Missile knocks him down with a bicycle kick. In the ring he assaults Oleg with a barrage of uppercuts. Missile hits the ropes. Oleg follows in and splashes him. Oleg drops Missile face first across his knee and gives him a big boot. A rolling senton gets him a two count. He picks up momentum off the ropes but misses a corner splash. Missile gives him three uppercuts before attempting the Missile Launcher. Oleg escapes. Missile comes off the second rope with a dropkick to the chest. He misses a diving headbutt. Oleg hits Off With His Head for the pin and his third point at 8:01. This exceeded my expectations and was a fun hard hitting affair. Both wrestlers looked strong, and it helped forward the story’s for each character. No complaints here. **½

Nøkken and Pinkie Sanchez are chatting when Jakob Hammermeier enters. Jakob is happy that his boys got the job done in Haverhill, MA. He says the new BDK will reach heights that the old BDK never even dreamed of.

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Challenge of the Immortals
The Arcane Horde (UltraMantis Black & The Batiri (Obariyon & Kodama)) vs. The BDK (Jakob Hammermeier, Nøkken & Pinkie Sanchez)

Hammermeier and Obariyon fight for control to start. Hammermeier chokes Obariyon in the corner. Obariyon nails a back elbow in the corner. Hammermeier responds in kind. Sanchez takes the proverbial bullet, jumping in to take double knees from Obariyon. Hammermeier takes Obariyon out, bringing in Kodama for a Lucha exchange that ends with a dropkick from Kodama. Kodama headscissors Nøkken, who cartwheels through and shoulder blocks Kodama down. He then knocks Mantis and Obariyon off the apron. Mantis comes in and rocks Nøkken with forearm strikes. The Batiri join in on the beatdown. Hammermeier and Sanchez join the fray. They’re disposed of. The Batiri drop toe hold Nøkken on the middle rope where Mantis Mongolian chops his back. Obariyon drives his knee into the back of Nøkken’s head and pescado’s onto Hammermeier and Sanchez. Kodama Asai moonsaults off of Nøkken’s back onto Hammermeier and Sanchez. Nøkken big boots Mantis to stop his Cactus clothesline attempt. He drops an elbow on his chest and applies a chinlock. Hammermeier and Sanchez wear down the Batiri on the floor so that they can join Nøkken in wearing down Mantis back in the ring. Mantis escapes their grasp by giving Hammermeier a back cracker. Obariyon does the deal with a Falcon Arrow on Sanchez. Nøkken misses a corner splash and gets double flapjacked by the Batiri. They each come off the second rope with offense. Mantis Uncle Slams Nøkken. Nøkken rolls out. Sanchez and Hammermeier get rid of the Batiri. Sanchez sole butt kicks Mantis into a suplex from Hammermeier. Mantis kicks out. Obariyon blocks Sanchez’s bicycle kick with a knee strike to the face. He dropkicks Obariyon’s legs out, crotching him on the top rope. Mantis however places Sanchez on his shoulders. The Batiri double knee strike Sanchez into the Japanese Ocean Cyclone suplex from Mantis. Nøkken breaks the pin and tosses Mantis outside. He slams Kodama onto his back. Obariyon throws some shots at Nøkken. Hammermeier rocks Obariyon with a rolling haymaker. Nøkken gives Obariyon a sitout chokeslam for the pin at 12:34. This was solid and the action was good, but I can’t help but feel like they could have done more. I really like how Mantis and the Batiri work together. It’s obvious that as this tournament progresses, they become more formidable. **¾

Princess Kimberlee pep talks Jervis Cottonbelly saying they’re going for the third point tonight. They believe they’re a good tag team, but Kimberlee wishes they would do better in the Challenge of the Immortals. Cottonbelly throws Los Ice Creams under the bus but Kimberlee says they might surprise him.

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Princess Kimberlee & Jervis Cottonbelly vs. The Gentleman’s Club (Chuck Taylor & Orange Cassidy)

Taylor baits Cottonbelly in with a handshake, kicking him in the belly. Cottonbelly gives Taylor a noogie in a side headlock. Taylor shoulder blocks him down. Cottonbelly maneuvers him into a side Russian legsweep. Taylor bails to the floor. Cassidy and Kimberlee come in, but Cassidy insists she retreats to a neutral corner before stepping in. He misses a chop. Kimberlee lays in one chop, and Cassidy leaves the ring in frustration. She gives him some more chops and some forearms in the corner. She and Cottonbelly land double elbow drops. Cottonbelly throws a series of open hand shots, then cradles Cassidy into a slumber. Cottonbelly pins him, but Taylor bites Kimberlee’s hand, causing her to scream and Cassidy to wake up. Kimberlee chops Taylor. Cassidy accidentally chops Taylor, then accidentally chops Bryce (shown off camera; great job, guys). Bryce then chops Taylor! Cassidy then chops Taylor. Bryce and Kimberlee chop both Cassidy and Taylor. Cottonbelly holds Taylor so a fans in Cottonbelly masks and tiara’s can chop Taylor. Cassidy sends Cottonbelly face first into a ring post while Taylor stomps on Kimberlee back in the ring. She gets isolated by the Gentleman’s Club. Cassidy resorts to hair pulling to keep on a side headlock. She tosses both Cassidy and Taylor by their hair, then collides their heads together before tagging in Cottonbelly. He lays out Taylor and Cassidy with back elbows. He he hip tosses Cassidy, then runs the ropes for a Frankensteiner on Taylor. Kimberlee gives Taylor her own Frankensteiner. She bicycle kicks Cassidy, Taylor superkicks Kimberlee. When she kicks out, Taylor tosses Cassidy a bottle of orange juice. He takes a drink and goes to spit it in Kimberlee’s face. Cottonbelly dives in the way to take it. Kimberlee German suplexes Cassidy and Taylor. She suicide dives onto Taylor. Cottonbelly rolls Cassidy into the Downton Lock. Cassidy taps out at 10:57! That was a lot of fun, which given the teams was to be expected. If the Swamp Monster were around it would have been perfect. It will be very interesting to see how Kimberlee and Cottonbelly stack up to the Devastation Corporation, but they showed excellent teamwork here. ***

You can watch this match in its entirety (for free!) here.

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Challenge of the Immortals
The Snake Pit (Ophidian, Eddie Kingston, Shynron & Argus) vs. The Wrecking Crew (The Devastation Corporation (Max Smashmaster, Blaster McMassive & Flex Rumblecrunch) & Jaka)

Ophidian’s team represents the Snake Pit while Smashmaster’s team represents the Wrecking Crew. Sidney Bakabella is in the Wrecking Crew’s corner. Ophidian stomps on Rumblecrunch’s foot instead of engaging in a test of strength. Rumblecrunch picks him up for a slam but Ophidian armdrags his way free. He also armdrags his way off of Rumblecrunch’s shoulders. Ophidian small packages him for two, then sends him to the floor with a spin kick. McMassive and Argus tag in. McMassive tosses Argus down out of a couple of lock-ups. Argus tries a sunset flip. McMassive goes to stomp him but Argus avoids it. McMassive misses a corner attack and Argus rolls him up for two. Shynron dropkicks McMassive to the floor. Smashmaster catches him kick and goozles him into the corner. He crushes Shynron with his body weight in the corner. Shynron goes for a twisting armdrag. Smashmaster avoids it, but Shynron headscissors him to the ropes and hits a tiger feint kick. He uses the ropes to bounce in. Smashmaster catches him in a Razor’s Edge, but mid-air Shynron turns it into a Frankensteiner. Kingston and Jaka go face to face. They take to the mat looking for a submission hold. Kingston grabs at Jaka’s jowls. Jaka slides under the ropes to escape. They resist one anothers’ shoulder blocks, devolving into a forearm strike and running kick battle. Smashmaster grabs Kingston by his legs and drags him to the floor where the Devastation Corporation attack. Jaka pescado’s onto them as the other Snake Pit members get involved. Oddly, it is Kingston who the Wrecking Crew decide to bully in their half of the ring. The Snake Pit try to interject, but are cut off and left restless watching their partner be picked apart. Kingston is able to crotch Smashmaster on the top, send Rumblecrunch and McMassive outside, and strike Jaka before suicide diving onto Rumblecrunch and McMassive. This brings in Argus, who after some strikes on Jaka ducks his spin kick and rolls him up for two. Jaka knocks Argus in the throat. Argus Judo throws Jaka when blocking a kick. Jaka superkicks Argus to the floor. Shynron enzuigiri’s Jaka. Ophidian drives double knees into Smashmaster twice. Shynron follows with a basement splash for a two count. Smashmaster gives Shynron a spinning tombstone when Rumblecrunch and McMassive drag Ophidian out. Ophidian is able to jump back in and save his partner from a pin. Rumblecrunch TKO’s Ophidian into Lariat Tubman from Ophidian. Argus makes the save. Rumblecrunch and McMassive pound him down. Smashmaster lands a Swanton Bomb. Argus kicks out! Kingston Backfists McMassive and Rumblecrunch. Jaka pounces onto Kingston, spilling out to the floor. Shynron counters a toss from McMassive, giving Rumblecrunch an Ace Crusher in mid-air. He back handsprings into an Ace Crusher on McMassive. Shynron, Ophidian, and Argus hit three simultaneous Ace Crushers’ on the Devastation Corporation, then dive after them once they go to the floor. In the ring, Kingston and Jaka revert to their earlier forearm exchange. Ophidian and Rumblecrunch try jumping in, but Kingston and Jaka dispose of them and trade chops with one another. Jaka headbutts Kingston and German suplexes him. Kingston gets up and nails a lariat for two. Jaka ducks the Backfist to the Future and lands the Jumanji Bomb. Kingston gets his shoulder up right around the one count. He tosses Jaka into a uranage for the pin at 20:20. The finish seemed off, as it was unclear if and when Jaka kicked out, even resulting in a “fire (Jon) Barber” chant. Despite the finish, this was an excellent match, with a lot of really fun exchanges and brawling. The Snake Pit looked more unified than ever and posed a real challenge to the much more imposing team. They meshed well and did one heck of a tease for Kingston vs. Jaka, which would come to pass just three weeks later. That will be terrific. ***½

The teams have to pull Jaka and Kingston apart as they want to keep fighting after the bell. Pissed off, Kingston literally flips a table and tosses a chair. He throws around another table and a trashcan but eventually leaves, though still angry.

Ashley Remington says the name Hallowicked has a nice ring to it, but so does the Grand Championship of CHIKARA. He’s faced many foes before, but never somebody with the aura Hallowicked presents. He’s curious what will happen when smooth meets scary. Remington wishes Hallowicked luck and throws a finger gun to the camera.

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Grand Championship
Hallowicked vs. Ashley Remington

Remington’s Challenge of the Immortals partners, Fire Ant, Worker Ant, and Amasis accompany Remington to the ring in their fanciest duds in support of their partner. Frightmare and Blind Rage are in Hallowicked’s corner. Hallowicked brings Remington to the mat with an armbar. Remington rolls forward and armdrags out into finger gun. Hallowicked slaps him in the face. Hallowicked goes back to working on Remington’s arm. Remington shoves Hallowicked to the corner and breaks on one. Hallowicked backs Remington to the corner and breaks on four. He does it twice, and on the third time pie faces Remington. Remington breaks on one, but Hallowicked kicks him in the stomach and pounds on his back. Remington grabs a side headlock and shoulder blocks Hallowicked down. Remington wants a German suplex but instead O’Connor Rolls Hallowicked for two. Remington sweeps out his legs. Hallowicked kicks him in the head from the mat. Hallowicked wants a hip toss, Remington reverses. Remington blocks another kick from the mat and sends Hallowicked to the floor. Remington looks for the German suplex in which Hallowicked goes to the corner. Once again Remington reminds us that he breaks on one. Hallowicked pounces, but Remington throws him out of a double leg position. Hallowicked retreats and Remington invites him back into the ring. Hallowicked snaps Remington’s arm across the top rope. He drives his elbow into Remington’s arm and looks for the Fujiwara armbar. Remington gets his foot on the bottom rope to escape. Hallowicked grabs a top wrist lock on the mat. Remington ducks a clothesline and backslides Hallowicked for two. Hallowicked blocks a kick and kicks Remington in the shoulder. He repeatedly headbutts Remington’s shoulder. He slams Remington on his shoulder and climbs the ropes. Hallowicked jumps off. Remington catches him mid-air into a belly-to-belly suplex. He knocks down Hallowicked to the corner with a clothesline. A running knee strike leads to a bulldog attempt. Hallowicked resists, but Remington drops him with the Fair Winds for two. Hallowicked fights off a German suplex. Hallowicked attacks his arm. He tries Go 2 Sleepy Hollow but Remington slides off and tries a waistlock. Hallowicked escapes and hits the Rydeen Bomb for two. Remington drives Hallowicked back first into the corner and lights him up with forearms and strikes. Hallowicked kicks him away when Remington is distracted by Bryce’s count. He snapmares Remington off the top rope. Remington gets his knees up to block a Swanton and lifts up Hallowicked into a German suplex! Hallowicked kicks out. Remington charges. Hallowicked moves, causing Remington’s shoulder to ram into the turnbuckle. Hallowicked yakuza kicks him for a two count. Hallowicked throws some forearms before landing a second yakuza kick for the pin at 14:51. Remington did an excellent job in this match. He sold his arm consistently and transitioned from being his normal, goofy self into a more serious opponent without betraying his character (i.e. still breaking on one in the corner although in the final portion of the match even though it would have been advantageous for him to put that ideal behind him.) Since Remington is very proficient in throws and suplexes, it made sense for Hallowicked to weaken his arm and it ended up playing right into the final moments of the contest. This was a strong first defense for Hallowicked and a nice one year anniversary for Remington in CHIKARA. ***½

Challenge of the Immortals Leaderboard
The Nightmare Warriors: 4 Points
The Wrecking Crew: 4 Points
Dasher’s Dugout: 3 Points
The BDK: 3 Points
The United Nations: 3 Points
The Arcane Horde: 2 Points
Battle Hive: 2 Points
The Gentleman’s Club: 2 Points
The Snake Pit: 2 Points
Crown & Court: 1 Point

The final score: review Good
The 411
This was up there with "Afternoon Delight" as one of my favorite shows this season. All the matches were worthwhile, had purpose, and were generally fun. This type of show gives you an overall look at CHIKARA in 2015, so if you're a lapsed fan, this might of interest.