411’s Impact Wrestling Report 9.13.19

Hey everyone, welcome to 411mania’s coverage of Impact wrestling. I’m Robert Winfree, still here for a couple more weeks as there’s a lot of wrestling and only one Larry. Larry was handling some live Impact action over HERE if you’re curious what their most recent live show looked like.

Broadcast opens with a recap of last weeks action, Moose vs. Shamrock advancing, Tessa Blanchard and oVe, Ace Austin continuing to be a douche bag, Tenille Dashwood showing up, Jordynne Grace and Rosemary having some issues, LAX leaving Impact, as well as Brian Cage proposing to Melissa Santos.

We’re starting with a match.

Match #1: Kiera Hogan vs. Tenille Dashwood

Some smack talk then a tie up, some wrist lock and related escapes go back and forth then Hogan hits a snapmare and a kick to the back. Dashwood gets angry, Hogan begs off then lands some strikes. Dashwood lands a running back elbow then a snapmare and a drop kick but only gets 2 on a cover and Hogan rolls outside to recover. Dashwood chases Hogan around the ringside area, then catches her in the ring and drops her across the ropes but only gets a 2 count. Hogan with a sunset flip then a super kick. Dashwood tries to fire up, Hogan slams her down by the hair but only gets 1 on a cover. Hogan drives Dashwood into the corner, and some corner offense follows. More corner offense into a cover but again only gets 2. Dashwood with some strikes, they run the ropes and Hogan with a slow motion wheelbarrow bulldog for 2. Dashwood fires up with punches and kicks then drops Hogan with clotheslines. Big kick from Dashwood sets up the double underhook suplex then a running low cross body as Hogan was seated in the corner but that only gets 2. Dashwood misses a kick, roll up from Hogan gets 2 then a roundhouse kick but Hogan only gets a 2 count. Hogan tries to set for her finisher, can’t hit and then runs into a wheelbarrow suplex from Dashwood but her cover only gets 2. Dashwood tries for a German suplex, Hogan escapes and chops the throat then a shotgun drop kick into the corner. Dashwood avoids a corner rush and locks in a Tarantula in the ropes then climbs up top, cross body then The Spotlight kick ends things.

OFFICIAL RESULT: Tenille Dashwood defeats Kiera Hogan via pinfall

Video of oVe in the back. Calliham is a little late but he’s really angry, he’s mad about Impact management not stripping Brian Cage of the World Title. He’s deeply annoyed by Cage getting to propose to Melissa Santos last week as well, he will not be calmed by Jake and Dave Crist. He’s also pissed at Tessa Blanchard and Tommy Dreamer, he promises that he and Jake Crist will take care of those two forever.

Back from break and Impact Tag Team Champions The North is in the back with Jimmy Jacobs. Alexander says that sending LAX out of Impact was even better than winning the titles. Page is annoyed that LAX is over shadowing the actual champions, he says that fairy tales aren’t real and that people should accept that The North is now their favorite tag team. Page says he doesn’t care about how it feels to get rid of LAX, it feels great to be the best tag team in the world.

Commentary runs down the Bound For Glory card as well as what’s on tap this evening.

Match #2: Michael Elgin vs. Dinastia

OK, Elgin is wrestling a midget. Dinastia is the AAA mini’s champion, Elgin looks really annoyed with everything. Elgin tosses Dinastia round a bit, easily overpowers him and tosses him across the ring. Dinastia avoids a rush and lands a couple of kicks but Elgin catches one then chops him down. Elgin catches him after some rope running and Dinastia hits a hurricanrana. Elgin catches Dinastia and hits a back breaker with one arm. Dinastia avoids a suplex then a rush and Elgin spills to the outside. Dinastia sets for a springboard back flip, Elgin catches him and hits the apron powerbomb. Elgin removes his elbow pad, decapitates Dinastia with a lariat, thinks about a powerbomb but instead hits a modified Emerald Flowsian due to the height difference.

OFFICIAL RESULT: Michael Elgin defeats Dinastia via pinfall

Elgin used that move to send a message to Naomichi Marufuji, who will be in Impact on October 20th. Elgin says he beat a best belt machine, stood side by side with a one in a million talent, and bloodied the Rainmaker, but during all his time in Japan Marufuji never got in the ring with him. Elgin says that Marufuji will be seeing him when he makes his way to Impact.

Taya Valkyrie in the back putting herself over while standing by Rosemary. Rosemary is confused by Valkyrie’s ability to bypass the wards that protect her cave, Valkyrie chocks that up to all the shiny stuff she’s wearing. She gives Rosemary a cellphone, Rosemary doesn’t seem amenable to this. Valkyrie wants to do brunch with her next week and heads out, leaving Rosemary a little confused by the entire thing.

Back from break, Fallah Bahh is eating and TJP walks by. TJP sits down, swaps their meals and tries to offer encouragement in Bahh’s desire to better himself. He wants Bahh to stop saying “Bahh” and promises to help him find his voice since they both have Filipino heritage.

James Mitchell is bathed in red light and tells Havok to drop the issue with Su Yung while she can, he says that Yung’s power grows the more you disregard it and even he’s a little afraid. He implores Havok to flee and that if she doesn’t he wont be able to save her.

Moose in the back, congratulating Ken Shamrock on getting his dream match. He says Shamrock is a smart man, because calling out Moose instantly makes him relevant but he doesn’t think Shamrock is still the most dangerous man. He says next week he’ll prove that he’s the most dangerous man now, and promises that Bound For Glory will be be Shamrock’s last match.

Match #3: Texano Jr. vs. Dr. Wagner Jr.

Wagner is accompanied by a large man who’s name I missed. Mic time for Wagner, Texano cuts him off as he’s trying to play with the crowd. Rights from Texano as they’re on the outside of the ring, Wagner fires back with chops and they roll back into the ring. Texano with kicks to the leg then a spinning toe hold. Texano keeps working the leg, he looks to grab his bull rope but the ref stops him and that lets Wagner recover. Dragon screw leg whip from Wagner, and another, then chops in the corner. Top rope cutter from Wagner but he takes too long to cover and Texano kicks out at 2. Texano drives Wagner to the corner, but when he charges Wagner moves and Texano is up and over all the way to the floor. Wagner climbs out and hits a tope from the apron then gets the bull rope but again the ref stops the use. Wagner tosses Texano into the barricade, gets a couple of chairs from the crowd but again the ref is trying to talk him out of it. Texano returns to the ring and cuts off Wagner with a kick then a hanging DDT but only gets 2. Leg lariat from Texano but he still only gets 2. Texano looks to climb the ropes, Wagner cuts him off with a blow then sets for a superplex, and gets it. Cover from Wagner but Texano kicks out. Wagner fires up, arm trapped lariat and he hits the Michinoku Driver for 3.

OFFICIAL RESULT: Dr. Wagner Jr. defeats Texano Jr. via pinfall

Ace Austin approaches Alisha Edwards in the back, he says he’s afraid of Eddie Edwards in their upcoming match and asks Alisha to promise to stay in the back because Eddie gets crazy when he snaps. She promises to remain in the back.

We get video of LAX packing up the clubhouse, Santana is amazed Ortiz is drinking coffee and they both feel like it can’t be over like that. Rich Swann and Willie Mack show up and they put over LAX and their history in Impact. Swann and Mack tell them they want to have one more match with LAX next week in their farewell match, Konnan agrees and says he’ll get management to agree to that farewell match.

Match #4: Ace Austin vs. Eddie Edwards

Edwards and Austin brawl early. Edwards takes advantage with chops, Austin tries to escape and Edwards dives out of the ring after him and takes him down. More offense from Edwards, Austin catches him off balance though, tries a suplex but Edwards smothers that and floors him with a chop. Edwards crotches Austin on the ring post then follows him into the ring. Austin tosses his jacket at Edwards then clocks him with a kick. Kicks to the head from Austin then he hits a snap suplex for a 2 count. Austin isolates the arm and rakes the card between the fingers. Austin tries a chop but looks like he hurt his hand, then hits a snapmare and kick. Forearms from Austin, Edwards back up and chops Austin. Austin drives Edwards to the corner and lands more kicks. More rights from Austin but Edwards is firing up and takes him down with a lariat then more chops. Machine gun chops from Edwards to Austin in the corner, Kobashi style. Austin avoids a rush, tries a kick but misses, Edwards hits the blue thunder bomb for a 2 count. Austin slips to the apron, smacks Edwards with his metal magician’s baton behind the refs back and hits a disaster style kick but can still only get a 2 count which sends us to a break.

Back from break, Austin holding a dragon sleeper but Edwards fights free. They trade some blows, Austin lands a series of knees and kicks then a running bulldog. Face buster from Austin, then Edwards with a flapjack, hits the Tiger Driver but can only get 2. Edwards sets for the Boston Knee Party, Austin rolls out of the ring. Edwards chases him and dives over the top rope to take him out again. Austin tries to get under the ring, pulls out a chair but Edwards seems to take that as an invitation to use it. Edwards with the chair, Austin lands a kick to the apron, he tries to do a handstand but Edwards throws the chair into his hand and that’ll end the match.

OFFICIAL RESULT: Ace Austin defeats Eddie Edwards via disqualification

Edwards continues to attack Austin after the match, lands a Boston Knee Party in the ring then mounts Austin and starts laying in blows. He throws the official around, then security shows up to try and talk him down. Edwards wont be deterred, lands a few more kicks as security keeps trying to talk him down. Austin rolls out of the ring, Edwards stares daggers at him then throws a chair at security before leaving.

Brian Cage and Melissa Santos are interviewed by Jimmy Jacobs about the engagement last week, Cage jokes about being able to pop the question to anyone in the crowd if Santos had turned him down, Santos says the wedding is in two weeks in Vegas. Cage says he would understand if he’d been stripped of the belt but makes his case for still being the champion.

Grainy video package for Johnny Swinger again.

There’s a video package for Ken Shamrock’s Valor bare knuckle event later this month.

Ace Austin is being loaded into an ambulance, Alisha Edwards accuses Eddie of cheating as Ace mocks him behind her back and says he’s not her husband anymore.

Match #5 – Tag Team Match: Big Mami and Nino Hamburguesa vs. Desi Hit Squad (Rohit Raju and Raj Singh) w/the Deaners

The Desi Hitsquad are forced to wear overalls by the Deaners, who the Squad is still indentured to. Nino and Singh start us off. The tie, Nino gets a side headlock, he runs the ropes a bit then body blocks Singh down. Raju tags himself in, Mami tags in as well. Mami avoids a punch but Raju kicks her in a bridge. Mami avoids a rope run and splashes Raju then a body block for a 1 count. Nino tags in and starts working the arm of Raju. Raju counters and drives him into their corner and tags in Singh. Singh with drop kicks to the knee then stomps. Singh up top, takes down one of the straps on his overalls but Nino avoids the elbow drop. Mami tags in and they double team Singh. Mami with the stink face, Raju is in but gets stacked up and a double stink face then Nine with a cannonball dive onto both of them. Mami holds the ropes open, Nino then with a dive onto the Squad on the outside. Now Mami climbs to the top rope, then dives onto all four men on the outside. They send Raju back in the ring, he winds up hitting a knee to Singh, Mami then hits a Samoan drop. Singh is legal, and Nino with a top rope splash that resembles a sofa falling down a stair case and that will end things.

OFFICIAL RESULT: Big Mami and Nino Hamburguesa defeat The Desi Hit Squad via pinfall

The Deaners mock the Desi Hit Squad in the ring but Shera re-debuts again to take out the Deaners. Gama Singh comes down to take credit for this, Shera takes a knee before Singh and orders the other members join him.

Match #6 – Tag Team Street Fight: oVe (X-Division Champion Jake Crist and Sami Callihan) vs. Tessa Blanchard and Tommy Dreamer

They brawl on the entrance ramp, Dreamer pairs off with Callihan while Blanchard battles Crist. They try to whip them into each other, Blanchard and Dreamer with a do see do and they take down Callihan and Crist. Blanchard follows Crist down to the ring, Dreamer batters Callihan a bit and then they follow down to the ringside area. Callihan turns the tables on Dreamer and slams him on the ramp. Blanchard and Crist trade forearms on the apron, Blanchard drops him off of it then hits a running hurricanrana. Callihan is at the top of the ramp staring down Blanchard, they clash and Callihan lands a right. Callihan sets for the Cactus Special, Blanchard grabs the ropes from the apron, blocks it and then hits a dive to Callihan and sends us to break.

Back from break as Dreamer whips Callihan into the stairs. Crist and Blanchard are in the ring and Crist lays in kicks. Blanchard run the ropes and hits a tilt-a-whirl DDT, then a suicide dive to Crist on the outside. Another dive from Blanchard, Callihan makes his way over and lands rights to Blanchard then grabs a staple gun. Dreamer is in the ring and blocks the staple gun, they trade teasing the gun spot, Callihan tries a sunset flip but Dreamer keeps his balance and staples the chest of Callihan. More staple shots to Callihan, including the mandated nut shot as he’s in the tree of woe. Crist back in and Dreamer and Blanchard lay into him with jabs and a stereo Bionic Elbow. Crist in the tree of woe now, both men with chairs in front of their faces, and stereo drop kicks from Dreamer and Blanchard. Stereo cutters, covers from both of them but only for 2. Dreamer sets up chairs in the corner while Blanchard kicks Crist in the corner. Callihan reverses a whip and drops Dreamer then Crist lays out Blanchard. Dreamer is down, Crist and Callihan isolate Blanchard who runs wild then runs into a double boot. Crist with a super kick as Callihan holds Blanchard up, then a double team cutter but only a 2 count. Crist puts Blanchard on the top rope, climbs up after her but Dreamer is back and they get Crist on the shoulders of Callian then Blanchard with a cross body to Crist. Blanchard back up top, hits Magnum but Callihan has a bat and floors Blanchard with it. Dreamer gets a kendo stick as Callihan tries for the Cactus special. DDT from Dreamer after the kendo stick shots. Dave Crist shows up, Dreamer takes him and Fulton out but that lets Callihan hit the Cactus Special for the 3 count.

OFFICIAL RESULT: oVe (Callihan and Crist) defeat Tommy Dreamer and Tessa Blanchard via pinfall

More attacks from Fulton, all of oVe set to take out Dreamer again but Blanchard is back in with the kendo stick and she takes down everyone but Fulton who no sells the shots. Fulton menaces her, Blanchard kicks him in the crotch then Callihan takes her down with a chair shot. Callihan sets for a piledriver, Rhino and RVD show up, Rhino gores Callihan and RVD drops Jake Crist then hits him with a 5 Star Frog Splash.

Nostalgia Trip and Blanchard stand tall in the ring while oVe regroup on the ramp.