411’s TNA Impact Wrestling Report 9.19.13

*****

The backstage interviewer is with Magnus from a few “moments ago”. Magnus says he came up short last week when Bobby Roode shows up. Roode says the only one to blame for last week is himself and out come Christopher Daniels and Frankie Kazarian with an attack from behind. Officials and refs break up the four men.

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LAST WEEK AT NO SURRENDER: Bully Ray retains the World Title (and destroys Mr. Anderson), AJ Styles wins the BFG Series.

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We cut to the arena where we pan the crowd as Mike Tenay hypes up tonight’s show, focusing on AJ Styles calling out Dixie Carter. Magnus makes his way out to his own theme and grabs a mic. Magnus says his body still hurts from coming close to winning the BFG Series. Magnus, on the record, wishes AJ Styles all the best of luck at Bound For Glory and says he’s the best today. Magnus changes gears to E.G.O. and how they tried to sabotage the main event last week. Magnus says he doesn’t have his family with him and dares any member of E.G.O. to come out and face him one-on-one. Magnus drops the mic and rips off the t-shirt. Frankie Kazarian walks out, accepting the challenge. Magnus and Kazarian trade fists and strikes, Magnus getting the upper hand with stomps in the corner, until Christopher Daniels attacks from behind. Daniels clubs Magnus down then holds his arms. Magnus ducks and Kazarian accidentally gets clotheslined. Kazarian gets sent out and it’s one-on-one again until Bobby Roode comes out to lend a hand. E.G.O. continue the attack until Sting and Samoa Joe make their way out to even the odds. E.G.O. quickly escape to the ramp. Sting grabs a mic and says they want a six-man tag team match tonight. Sting’s music kicks up again as Sting chases E.G.O. away.

• THOUGHTS: Interested in the match this built up but wasn’t so interested in the segment itself. Not a hot start to the show, at least for me.

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We awkwardly cut to the announce table where Mike Tenay segues into AJ Styles’ post-match comments at the end of last week’s show. More hype for the Styles/Carter confrontation.

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Manik is backstage with Chris Sabin and Velvet Sky. Sabin condescendingly says he’s proud of Manik and that he’s had a big hand in his success plus puts over his brief World Title reign during the summer. Sabin fishes for a “thank you” but it doesn’t come so he says “you’re welcome” instead. Manik says he has to get ready for his match and Sabin awkwardly tells him to “go get ’em tiger!”. Sabin tells Sky they should get a better look at the upcoming matchup.

• THOUGHTS: I probably didn’t explain it too well in the writeup but Sabin was actually pretty awesome with his heel-tinged comments and egocentrism. I guess his post-unnecessary World Title run role is that of a heel and I’m for it.

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Jeff Hardy makes his way out for the first match of the show. Hardy plays nice with the fans at ringside as we go to commercial.

• THOUGHTS: This show is only 10 minutes in and the editing is already driving me crazy. Feels very choppy. Did an intern do this or something?

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-Commercial Break-

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Hardy’s entrance routine concludes and out comes his opponent, Manik, next. Tenay puts over how Manik asked for this match because he wanted to prove himself against someone of Hardy’s caliber. Chris Sabin and Velvet Sky make their way out next to watch the match more closely.

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Match #1: *TNA X-Division Champion* Manik Vs. Jeff Hardy in a NON-TITLE MATCH

Manik grabs a side headlock and takes Hardy down with a wristlock. Hardy kips up and applies a wristlock of his own. Manik rolls through, does a cartwheel, then sweeps the leg for a 1-count. Hardy sweeps the legs for a 1-count of his own and both men get to their feet in a stalemate. Sabin cheerleads at ringside. Manik backs Hardy in the corner and connects with a European uppercut. Hardy connects with a headscissors out of the corner, sending Manik to the floor. Hardy follows up with a baseball slide then hits a flying clothesline off the apron. The action heads back in the ring and Manik dodges a corner dropkick. Manik ducks a clothesline and sends Hardy throat-first into the second rope off a drop toehold. Manik hits a springboard dropkick from the apron then waits for Hardy to get back up. Manik attempts a springboard dropkick but Hardy dodges it and hits a WHISPER IN THE WIND for the 1…2…kickout.

Hardy goes for the Twist of Fate but Manik slips out and hits a Detonation Kick. Hardy attempts a roll-up but Manik sits down and covers for the 1…2…kickout. Hardy fights back and connects with the TWIST OF FATE. Hardy takes the shirt off and heads to the top. Hardy connects with the SWANTON for the 1…2…3.

Winner [via Pinfall]: Jeff Hardy (4:02)

• MATCH THOUGHTS: Manik and Hardy were holding back like no other, leading to a match that was much less interesting than it looked on paper. I’m guessing they’ll meet again soon and they just didn’t wanna give it all away.

POST-MATCH: Hardy picks Manik up and holds his arm up in celebration before leaving the ring. Chris Sabin climbs to the ramp and into the ring. Sabin holds Manik’s arm up in celebration then attacks him from behind. Hardy runs back in and chases Sabin out of the ring. Sabin, all smiles, leaves the ringside area as Velvet Sky acts shocked.

• THOUGHTS: Yup I’m already in love with heel Chris Sabin.

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“EARLIER TODAY” VIDEO: Dixie Carter arrives to the arena and dodges questions, just saying there’s “a lot goin’ on”.

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-Commercial Break-

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The mystery interviewer catches up with Chris Sabin backstage. Sabin says Manik was disrespecting him despite all of his accomplishments. Sabin says no one else respects him either so he’s going to take the respect he deserves. Sabin brushes the interviewer off and leaves.

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ODB makes her way out for the next match. Her opponent, Knockouts Champ Mickie James, makes her way out second.

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Match #2: Mickie James (c) Vs. ODB for the TNA Knockouts Title

ODB shoves at James, and James immediately goes into the full mount with right hands. ODB reverses into a full mount of her own then takes James down with a clothesline. James pokes the eyes and brings ODB down with a snapmare. James follows up with a dropkick to a seated ODB for a 1-count. James knees ODB in the gut and whips her into the opposite corner. ODB gets an elbow up during a corner splash attempt but gets pulled off the top turnbuckle, her head smacking against the back of the canvas. James chokes ODB against the second rope but runs right into a spear when she attempts a leg lariat and ODB covers for the 1…2…kickout. James uses a crane kick and cracks ODB in the skull, following up with a flapjack. James kips up and does a little curtsy for the fans. James heads to the top turnbuckle but lands on her feet when ODB dodges a move attempt. James turns around and ODB hits her with a fallaway slam. ODB kips up herself as James rolls out of the ring, begging for a time out. ODB grabs her by the hair and heads to the apron, but Jame sweeps the leg sending ODB falling flat against the side of the ring. James high-fives Taz then eats chops from ODB, who’s tied up in the ring curtain, as we go to commercial.

-Commercial Break-

James connects with a neckbreaker on ODB as we return from commercial. James covers but only gets 2, so she tries again with the same result. James clubs ODB in the back and kicks at her as she gets back up in the corner. ODB reverses a corner Irish whip but eats a boot and elbow during corner splash attempts. James attempts a headscissors but ODB reverses it into a power bomb and now both ladies are down. James and ODB get to their feet and trade shots. James wins the shootout but runs right into a clothesline followed by a shoulderblock. ODB connects with a delayed vertical suplex and covers for the 1…2…kickout. ODB slaps the mat in frustration then stomps to rev up. James thwarts a corner splash with boots to the chest then follows up with a spinkick to the jaw, knocking her out. James yells at ODB to get up but she doesn’t so she picks her up instead. James drags her to the corner for a tornado Micki-DT but ODB escapes and hits the TKO for the 1…2…3! New champ!

Winner and NEW Knockouts Champion [via Pinfall]: ODB (10:54)

• MATCH THOUGHTS: A good match but Tenay and Taz’s apathy when calling it took it down a few notches. At least pretend you give a damn, guys. The outcome wasn’t surprising considering James is on her way out (also because there are spoilers floating around) and I’m happy ODB is getting another run even if it’s out of necessity because she’s the only member of the X-Division now (I know there are a couple other women, let me have the joke!).

POST-MATCH: Eric Young runs in to celebrate with his wife. Joseph Park is there too and drinks a giant bottle of chocolate milk. Their celebration is broken up by The Bromans (Robbie E & Jessie Godderz). Robbie E has a mic and asks what the hell is going on around this place, bro. Robbie E says he hates to break up this weird celebration but he’s wondering why Park is even in the ring since he’s not the one married to ODB. Robbie E calls Park a third-wheel hamster loser (bro). Robbie E calls them the creepiest 3-way in history (bro). The Bromans fake vomit and Park grabs a mic. Park asks who they think they are trying to besmirch the institution of marriage, the win by ODB. Park makes fun of The Bromans’ outfits for a cheap pop and says if he wasn’t in a suit he would teach both of them a lesson right now. Robbie E asks Park if he’s challenging him to a match (bro). Young grabs the mic from Park and calls Robbie E “spikes”. Young says he doesn’t have a suit on and beckons for Robbie E (as a ref rolls in).

• THOUGHTS: EY, Park, and The Bromans are all entertaining in their own ways so while I’m not upset at seeing them, this is the filleriest of filler.

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Match #3: Eric Young Vs. Robbie E

Young dodges a corner splash and rolls Robbie E up for the 1…2…3!

Winner [via Pinfall]: Eric Young (0:14)

• MATCH THOUGHTS: Match of the week.

POST-MATCH: Robbie E says he wasn’t challenging EY, he was challenging Park. Robbie E calls him a scared fat bastard so Park takes his glasses and suit jacket off. The match is happening next!

• THOUGHTS: Still time for a pee break for five, people.

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-Commercial Break-

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-Commercial Break-

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Match #4: Joseph Park Vs. Robbie E

Park dodges a corner splash and rolls Robbie E up for the 1…2…3!

Winner [via Pinfall]: Joseph Park (0:08)

• MATCH THOUGHTS: No this was match of the week.

POST-MATCH: The Bromans immediately lay out EY in the ring and Park at ringside. The Bromans roll back in the ring after sending Park into the ring post and double team Young some more. Park is bleeding, so he goes into ABYSS MODE and destroys The Bromans, taking Godderz out with a chokeslam and Robbie E with the Black Hole Slam. Park snaps back and asks Young what just happened then the two hug and celebrate in the ring.

• THOUGHTS: And thus concludes the “we had nothing better to throw on the show this week” portion of the show. Back to actual things.

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We cut to the announce table where Tenay segues into a video summing up the Ray/Mr. Anderson feud and their match last week, culminating in Ray laying his former VP out with a piledriver on the entrance stage.

• THOUGHTS: I’m gonna miss Mr. Anderson; his amazing chemistry with Bully Ray was some of the best parts of the show over the past few months.

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-Commercial Break-

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Hulk Hogan runs into Dixie Carter backstage. He asks what AJ Styles’ issue is and Carter pretty much brushes him off, saying she’s got this and doesn’t need Hogan’s help.

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Bully Ray Speaks

Bully Ray makes his way out to the ring, joined by Brooke Tessmacher and what remains of The Aces & Eights (Knux, Garett Bischoff, & Wes Brisco). Ray grabs a mic and says he understands everyone is proud of their World Champion (the crowd boos). Ray jokingly asks where Mr. Anderson is and says he couldn’t make it tonight. Ray asks the crowd “DO YOOOU KNOW WHO I AMMMM?” Ray says they guessed it; he’s Bully Ray, the World Heavyweight Champion, the President of the Aces & Eights, and there’s nothing anyone can do about it. Ray says Brooke is the reason he’s still World Champion, The Aces & Eights members angrily looking on. Ray looks at The Aces & Eights and asks what their problem is. Brisco freaks out saying they have put everything on the line for him and he’s giving credit to just her. Ray admonishes Brisco for his anger, then Bischoff grabs the mic. Bischoff says Brisco has a point and says ever since Brooke has come along his judgment and priorities have been way out of whack. Ray says he appreciates Bischoff’s passion then pushes him against the corner. Ray tells Bischoff to never ever talk to him like that again. Ray says he made Bischoff and Brisco, and threatens to slap them in the face. Knux grabs the mic and asks Ray if he’s going to slap him in the face too. Knux tells Ray he has a big mouth and maybe he’s the guy to shut it for him. Knux says they’ve sacrificed night after night to keep the belt around Ray’s waist. Knux says The Aces & Eights started with 25 members and now there are just four thanks to Ray’s leadership. Knux tells Ray he forgot one of the rules of the club: bros before hos. Ray shoves Knux and grabs the mic. Ray tells Knux if he ever steps out of line again he will knock his head off. Knux takes off his beanie and walks towards Ray. Ray and Brooke immediately bail out of the ring.

• THOUGHTS: With the only other interesting member of The Aces & Eights now gone, I’m over this whole slow-burning “Aces & Eights implode” storyline. This segment did what it needed to push the story along, but it felt like it went on a smidge too long and honestly none of the three guys left feel like they can even pose much of a threat to Ray. They’re scrubs. I did like Knux getting mic time and referencing the fact The Aces & Eights used to have way more members though. That was a nice touch and I’m glad someone finally brought that up.

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Sting and Samoa Joe give Magnus a pep talk backstage.

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-Commercial Break-

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Chavo Guerrero Jr. and Hernandez make their way out to the ring for the next match. Guerrero subtly makes sure he’s in front of Hernandez. They pose to not much crowd response. Their opponents, James Storm & Gunner, make their way out second. Guerrero grabs a mic and says as much as he wants to fight, he’s a little injured and the doc hasn’t medically cleared him. Gunner grabs the mic and says Guerrero/Hernandez are a little scared but he came out here to fight, so before he leaves the ring someone is going to fight him. Gunner points at Hernandez and challenges him. Storm says he’ll be at ringside cheering him on and drinking beers.

• THOUGHTS: Somehow a match I was dreading was replaced with one that looks even worse. To say this episode of Impact is a “cool down” from last week is an understatement. A massive, massive understatement.

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Match #5: Gunner Vs. Hernandez

Gunner goes right on the offensive but Hernandez takes him down with a bodyblock and covers for 1. Gunner fights back with a series of forearms and a knee to the skull. Gunner attempts a suplex but Hernandez blocks it and suplexes Gunner onto the top rope. Hernandez covers for 1 and hits a series of right hands. Hernandez chops Gunner and whips him hard into the opposite corner. Hernandez picks Gunner up and hits the overhead backbreaker. Hernandez covers Gunner but only manages 2. Hernandez gets the crowd clapping (?!?) and goes for a splash but Gunner gets his knees up. Gunner hits the ropes for momentum but runs right into a shoulder from Hernandez. Hernandez gets backdropped to the apron and fights Gunner off before walking down the ramp. Hernandez gets the running head start and connects with AIR MEXICO. Gunner and Hernandez trade chops, but Hernandez gets a knee to the gut. Gunner blocks a suplex and hits a slingshot suplex of his own. Gunner mounts his comeback with clotheslines and elbows, then hits a running corner splash/knee. Gunner picks Hernandez up and delivers a sort-of fallaway slam. Gunner connects with the urinage backbreaker as a follow-up and covers for the 1…2…3!

Winner [via Pinfall]: Gunner (4:18)

• MATCH THOUGHTS: About as dull and awkward as you would expect from these two, plus it felt like 20 minutes instead of 4. Moving on.

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AJ Styles is shown backstage, talking on a cell phone.

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-Commercial Break-

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E.G.O. (Bobby Roode, Christopher Daniels, & Frankie Kazarian) make their way out for the main event to Bad Influence’s music. Their opponents, The Main Event Mafia (Magnus, Samoa Joe, & Sting), make their way out second. Sting makes sure he has his bat before they finally head to the ring. The MEM chase E.G.O. out of the ring.

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Main Event: The Main Event Mafia (Magnus, Samoa Joe, & Sting) Vs. E.G.O. (Bobby Roode, Christopher Daniels, & Frankie Kazarian)

Joe and Daniels start for their respective teams. Daniels attacks Joe from behind thanks to Kazarian’s distraction. Daniels works Joe over in the corner, biting his forehead and raking the eyes. Daniels whips him into the opposite corner but runs right into an STO from Joe. Joe connects with rapid-fire kicks to the skull followed by a running knee in the corner. Joe chokes Daniels in the corner then face washes him repeatedly. Joe goes for the follow-up kick but Daniels escapes the ring before that can happen. Kazarian is apparently the legal man now and Joe sends him into the ring. Kazarian attempts a second-rope crossbody but Joe nonchalantly moves out of the way. Magnus tags in and he and Joe connect with their double team strikes and splashes. Magnus covers Kazarian for 1. Magnus connects with some forearms then floors Kazarian with a European uppercut. Sting tags in and connects with a dropkick. The action spills to the outside and Sting tosses Kazarian into the ring steps. Sting sends Kazarian into the steps once more, this time shoulder-first. Sting rolls him back in and connects with an inverted atomic drop. Daniels sweeps Sting’s legs from the floor and Kazarian connects with a legdrop from the second rope. E.G.O. is in control as we go to commercial.

-Commercial Break-

Sting fights off Roode as we return from break. Roode fights back with a knee lift followed by a running clothesline for 2. Kazarian tags in and chops Sting, then sends him head-first into the boots of Roode and Daniels. Daniel phantom tags in and hits a flying forearm. Kazarian follows with a spinning heel kick and Daniels covers Sting for the 1…2…kickout. Daniels grabs a chin/armlock to wear Sting down. Sting fights out of the hold but Daniels drives the shoulder into the midsection. Daniels brings Sting to the mat with a snap mare then tags into Kazarian, who hits a slingshot legdrop for the 1…2…kickout. Kazarian applies a front facelock and Roode distracts the ref, who misses the tag out. The MEM protest, allowing E.G.O. to triple team the Stinger.

Kazarian does his own “WOOOO!” then goes back to work on Sting. Roode tags in and hits a shot to the midsection followed up with a suplex. Sting dodges a clothesline from Kazarian, who hits Daniels instead, then connects with a clothesline of his own. Roode tags in but so does Magnus. Magnus takes it to Roode with back to back clotheslines followed a third clothesline. Magnus picks Roode up and connects with the Michinoku Driver for the 1…2…Daniels breaks the count. Joe runs in but gets sent to the floor. Sting takes it to Daniels but Kazarian attacks from behind. Sting ducks a double clothesline and hits one of his own on Bad Influence. Roode runs in and takes Sting out with a DDT. Joe splashes Roode in the corner and snap mares him to the mat, leaving him prone to a Magnus top-rope elbow for the 1…2…Daniels breaks the count once again. Bad Influence try to double team Joe but once again their attempts fail. Joe gets rid of Kazarian, connecting with a suicide dive through the ropes. Daniels goes for a move of his own but Sting catches him with a backdrop followed by a Stinger Splash. Sting applies a SCORPION DEATH LOCK but it doesn’t count. The ref gets distracted, allowing Roode to hit Magnus in the back with a baseball bat (Magnus covered Sting to save him from the shot). Roode covers and the ref sees it, counting the 1…2…3!

Winners [via Pinfall]: E.G.O. (14:27)

• MATCH THOUGHTS: A really fun six-man tag team match that ends the show on a good note wrestling-wise thankfully. Magnus taking the bat shot for Sting was an interesting way to get to the end. Also I’m pretty sure E.G.O. has now been more successful against MEM than The Aces & Eights ever were.

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-Commercial Break-

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AJ Styles and Dixie Carter: Face-to-Face

AJ Styles makes his way out for the big show-ending angle. Styles says he has been here since day 1, busting his ass trying to put TNA on the map. Styles then says “POOF!” Dixie Carter’s Dad bought her a “rasslin” company. Styles says Dixie broke up the chemistry that made TNA what it was. Styles asks what happened to the X-Division stars like Jerry Lynn and Low-Ki, and says they were ditched in favor of MMA fighters and other stars. Styles says he’s pissed off about it and namedrops some more former TNA stars. Styles says Dixie’s biggest mistake is staring her right in the face (she is not currently out there). Styles says despite what the internet says he doesn’t have a contract here, and then says that no one contracted to TNA respects Dixie anyway. Styles says he’s going to win the World Title for his band of brothers and for the fans, then make Dixie get on her knees and beg…then make her pay. This got creepy quickly.

Dixie Carter makes her way out to the ring. Styles tells Dixie to say something. Dixie says she has known Styles for a long time and that he’s said all these publicly means he meant it from the bottom of his heart. Dixie says she holds herself accountable for everything and owes Styles an apology. Dixie says she’s sorry…to let Styles think he was ever important in this company. Dixie says Styles being “The Phenomenal One” was just a gimmick she created. Dixie tells Styles that he’s nothing like he used to be. Dixie continues her heel nonsense then says without her Daddy’s paycheck he would still be in a trailer. Dixie says she built TNA and owns it, and Styles is lucky to have ever been a part of it. Dixie calls for Styles’ mic to be cut off and says this show is over. The lights go out and the crowd boos to conclude this episode.

• THOUGHTS: AJ Styles fell flat last week in hyping this bombshell but admittedly this week he brought the goods and gave a heartfelt worked shoot promo in a way I’ve never heard from him before. I appreciated that, and I’m sure it comes from a very real place (I’d be pissed too if I helped build a company and it was squandered on nonsense like TNA has spent money on). Hell even Dixie Carter wasn’t half-bad at her heel promo, yelling at Styles and forcing the show to cut. But this storyline is ridiculous, uninspired, and almost exactly like CM Punk’s big run from 2011. It feels like a reenactment in some instances, with Styles namedropping people to be controversial (a tactic I hated when Punk did it too), and his mic getting cut and all of that jazz. It’s a retread and it does nothing for TNA’s image as “WWE-Light”. Now if Dixie employs Bully Ray, the man who tried to destroy her company, to destroy AJ Styles…that might be a cool wrinkle. I’ll cross my fingers for that.

*****

OVERALL SHOW THOUGHTS: Last week’s show was the best TNA has put on all year and it was going to be hard to top. This week’s show was not even close, coming off as an uninspired B-show for the bulk of its running time with pointless segments and matches (the crappy editing didn’t help either). Heel Sabin was awesome, the six-man tag team match and Knockouts Title match were fun, and the ending show angle was decent (and could lead to good things), but overall I couldn’t shake that half of it felt like filler. We’ll talk about this more in the comments section, I’m sure.

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When not covering Impact (almost) every Thursday for 411, Jon can be found pontificating and incorrectly using other big words on his own site Pro Wrestling Update. You can also find him on Twitter. But for the next few weeks you’ll mostly just find him playing Grand Theft Auto V.