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411’s WCW Monday Nitro Report 1.08.01

January 8, 2001 | Posted by Widro

WCW Monday Nitro Report 1.8.01
Live from St. Paul Minnesota
Announcers are Tony, Scott… and Disqo
Report by Wids

Highlights from last week

Nitro Open

We’re starting it out with Old Man Flair, who is flanked by about 8 security guards. Flair says the Vikings will be the Giants- no way, jose. Flair then calls Sin Sunday the biggest PPV of the year, which doesn’t bode well for 2001, eh? Flair turns his attention to Mike Sanders, who has the put the commissionership on the line against the Cat at Sin. Then we talk about the main event, so here comes the Cho Cho Chosen One, and yes, Jeff Jarrett calls Flair a slapass. Flair then says there will NOT be a 3way dance for the title, and that brings out the Big Bad Booty Champion. Tee hee, Flair says it wont be a 3 way dance, it will be a 4 way dance, with yes, Goddammit It’s Sid. Steiner says it will be he and JJ against Sid and the mystery man. Flair says Steiner can’t trust JJ and shows some video to stir shit up. Flair makes Steiner vs. JJ for the title tonight. Steiner then charges the ring and says he’s not fighting JJ, he’s fight Flair. Ric says touch me and you’re stripped. Steiner threatens Flair, JJ disappears.

Goldberg and SARGE arrive together. Awww. Goldberg threatens some guy to tell him where Kronic is.

Commercial Break

Sanders gets the Harris Boyz to protect him.

Flair walks with security backstage, Shane Douglas confronts Flair and demands why he isn’t in the main event. Flair gives Shane a match with Sid, he’s in the main event if he wins.

WCW Cruiserweight Title
Shannon Moore w/Shane Helms vs. C-H-A-V-O (not wacko) (c)
Chavo on your stick, he runs down Shane Helms. Chavo makes this a title match, and if Shannon wins, Shane is out of luck, says Chavo. Back and forth. Chavo takes control. Chavo with a strange stretch. Shannon gets out of it flies around with a sunset flip for 2. Chavo rebounds. Tries a bodyslam, Shannon rolls up for 2. Shannon with a sprinboard fameasser for 2. Shannon with a head scissors takeover for 2. Shannon goes for the sleeper slam, Chavo backs Shannon into the corner, some rollups, Chavo gets the brainbuster.
Winner and STILL champ: Chavo

Chavo still attacks after the match, Shane runs him off. Has 3count turned face?

Commercial Break

Backstage, Sanders attacks Kwee Wee, and Big Vito makes the save.

Top Cat vs. The Harris Boyz
Hey, they look like Creative Control tonight. Cat on the mic, pleads with the Harrises. Cat calls them twin Frankensteins and they attack the Cat. The beatdown goes on and on. Apparently its technically a singles match, but both Harrises are involved in the beatdown. Cat rebounds a bit with some kicks, chops, elbow drop. More kicks. Other Harris in to the ring- The Old Switcheroo! And then BOOOOOOM it’s the H-BOMB!!!
Winners: Harrises

Commercial Break

Gene interviews the Cat, and Gene wonders if he will be at Sin. To prove that he is ok, the Cat dances.

General Rection is talking to Sid, and asks Sid to save just a little of the Franchise for him.

Steiner and JJ talk backstage, they bicker, but Steiner goes to talk to Flair.

Gene interviews the NBT. Sanders says he was jumped by “Kee” Wee and Big Vito, so Sanders puts those two guys in a match against randomly selected opponents.

Commercial Break

Lex, Buff and Kronic chat. Lex and Buff booked Kronic against Goldberg and Sarge, but since its WCW match, no cash. NO CASH? How will they cash checks and break necks?

Can I Be Serious For A Moment vs. You Cant Powerbomb Kidman
Team Canada comes to the ring. Storm challenges the Filthy Animals to a Canadian Penalty Box match, which is something to do with rules and Power Plays. Kidman charges and goes to work. Konnan joins the announce team and immediately bickers with Disqo. Storm hangs Kidman across the top rope. Storm drops Kidman. Storm has a chair from Mike Awesome as Prime Time distracts the ref. Kidman tries a crucifix, Storm catches him and does a fireman’s carry into a forward roll. Backbreaker. Disco says Kidman could be a star if he got to the gym. Abdominal stretch by Storm. Storm with a springboard from the apron, Kidman counters with a dropkick, both are down. Back and forth, sitout powerbomb by Kidman for 2. Superkick by Storm for 2. Rollups by both. Kidman goes for a pin after Storm’s head collides with the chair from before. Kidman pulled out, then all the factions brawl on the floor. Kidman hits the Kid Crusher and pins Storm!
Winner: Kidman

Commercial Break

Goddammit It’s Sid vs. Shane Douglas
Shane on the mic. Wow no mention of Torrie. Sid is wearing jeans. Shane goes to work early. Sid gets a boot up in the corner and Shane rolls to the floor. Sid follows and attacks. Brawling to the announce position. Back into the ring. Shane measures Sid for a swinging neckbreaker for 2. Shane gets the chain from his trunks. Sid with a big boot to the face, and goes to work. Sid signals for the chokeslam, crowd is hot for Sid. On the way up for the chokeslam, Shane hits Sid, goes for Franchiser, Sid blocks and hits the chokeslam. Powerbomb.
Winner: Sid

As Sid exits, Steiner and JJ attack him in the aisle.

Commercial Break

Gene interviews Flair. Why are they portraying Flair like such a goody goody moron? Flair then makes the Canada vs. Animals match with a special ref: Hacksaw, who graces our presence with a great interview.

Funk in the ring, says he has to battle against nobodies like Crowbar. He says Flair is trying to destroy him, because when people fight nobodies, they become nobodies. He challenges Goldberg. And Steiner. And DDP. Did Funk just say Meng had a monkey face? Here comes Crowbar to rebut. Daffney has sparklers. Funk says he is the reason hardcore wrestling is big in the US. He started ECW apparently. Crowbar says he is new school and will lead the new Hardcore Revolution. Crowbar charges, Funk clears out and Meng attacks with a chair. Funk: is that the best you got? THEN THE TONGAN DEATH GRIP! Crowbar attacks Meng with the wooden chair, and Meng does the grip through the chair!

Commercial Break

Into some office, someone replaces paper in a jacket pocket with a different piece of paper.

Kronic vs. Goldberg and SARGE
Disqo is pissed that Kronic is working for free. Adams and Goldberg brawl in the aisle. Sarge and Clarke in the ring. Goldberg finally gets to the ring. Didn’t Goldberg beat Kronic by himself? Why does he need Sarge? Match settle down to Kronic beating up Sarge. Let’s wait for the hot tag. Ah, here it is. Goldberg in control, but then Adams hits the Full Nelson slam. High Times? No he battles out of it. Spears Adams. Clarke has Goldberg. Spear on Clarke. Totally Buff beats up Sarge on the floor. Jackhammer on Clarke.
Winners: Goldberg and Sarge

Lex rips the cast off of Sarge and beats Goldberg with it. Buff has a chair.

Commercial Break

“First Ever Minnesota Massacre Match”
Here comes Sanders, he has an envelope. Hey, that’s the same size paper that was switched in that shady backstage shot before! Sanders wonders who the participants are. First mystery guy is Sanders. Second guy is Chuck Palumbo. Oh, a third name, it’s Sean O’Haire. Fourth guy is… DDP. Sanders is shocked. Tony catches on- the envelope was switched. Yay, the fifth guy is Big Gutty. Sanders on the mic, but Insiders attack. Sanders grabs a tag belt and beats down DDP and Nash. Thrillers in control. Page and Chuck go at it in the corner. Nash in the corner on his back around the ringpost, with Sanders beating him. Other Thrillers go after DDP. DDP ducks as Palumbo and O’Haire knock each other out. All men down, Sanders thinks he should win, and DDP hits a penis uppercut. All five men down. He counts them all down. Page up Chuck up Nash up. Nash sends Sanders to the floor and Nash foot chokes O’Haire. Page DDTs Chuck. The other NBT try to come down, but Vito and Kwee Wee stop them. Diamond Cutter on Chuck, Powerbomb on Sean. Both DDP and Nash are standing, but the ref strangely calls it the end.
Winners: DDP and Nash

Commercial Break

WCW World Title
Big Poppa Pump (c) w/Midajah vs. The Chosen One
Steiner out first, on the mic, he’s not happy to fight JJ. He would fight Sting, but he put him in the hospital. Also Booker T. Steiner says he’s not fighting JJ, he doesn’t care if Flair is CEO or not.

JJ backstage says “it ain’t happenin’”

Commercial Break

JJ makes his entrance, with guitar and pyro. JJ on the mic, says there is no match, and Mr. CEO Slapnutz, choke on that. Flair comes out on the entrance, says they have to wrestle, if not Steiner is stripped, and JJ has no spot in the Sin main event. Steinr attacks and we are underway. Steiner chops JJ in the corner. Hip toss. Guerilla press drop. Steiner charges JJ, but JJ gets the boots up and then goes to work. Thigh on head on the middle rope. Chokes Steiner with his shirt. Steiner takes control and does some push ups. JJ with a dropkick! Goes up top, High cross body for 2! Tilt a whirl by Steiner. Puts JJ in the TREE OF WOE and chokes him. Steiner jaws with the fans. They brawl on the floor. JJ whipped into the STEEEEEEEEEL railing. Again. Steiner slams JJ on the announce table. JJ with a low blow. Back into the ring, JJ tries the Stroke, but Steiner blocks. Belly to belly by Steiner for 2. Goddammit Its Sid, and he attacks Steiner. Nails JJ. Here comes the Crazy Masked Straight Jacket Man!!!
No Contest

He is crazy! Crowd is barking, do they know something we don’t? JJ and CMSJM brawl, Sid and Steiner brawl. Sid and Crazy Masked Straight Jacket Guy clear the ring and stand tall.


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