Csonka’s WWE Raw Review 3.25.19

Csonka’s WWE Raw Review 3.25.19

OFFICIAL RESULTS
– Beat The Clock Match: Ronda Rousey defeated Sarah Logan @ 1:25 via Submission [NR]
– Beat The Clock Match: Charlotte vs. Ruby Riott failed to beat the clock [NR]
– Beat The Clock Match: Becky Lynch defeated Liv Morgan @ 1:19 via pin [NR]
– Finn Balor defeated Lashley & Jinder Mahal @ 5:50 via pin [**]
– Non-Title Match: Aleister Black & Ricochet defeated Champions The Revival @ 9:45 via pin [***]
– Sasha Banks vs. Natalya went to a no contest @ 7:27 [**½]
– Baron Corbin defeated Apollo Crews @ 2:45 via pin [NR]
– Non-Title Match: Kurt Angle defeated US Champion Samoa Joe @ 8:00 via pin [***]
– Last Man Standing Match: Drew McIntyre defeated Dean Ambrose @ 9:50 [***]

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– Rousey makes her way to the ring and doesn’t look pleased as the crowd chants for Becky. She hypes the Mania main event, and says. “You’re welcome.” She promises to tap Charlotte & Becky at the same time. The Riott Squad and then Beck arrives. She mocks Ronnie for being a weirdo, and says she was given everything, including a big contract but no one gave a damn until The Man came around. She saved Ronnie’s run and that’s why they are main eventing. Charlotte arrives and takes credit for them main eventing, because she was handpicked.

Ronda Rousey vs. Sarah Logan: Logan runs, Rousey chases and finally back in and Logan attacks. She lays the boots to Rousey, but Rousey fights out and hits the Superman punch and arm bar for the win. Ronda Rousey defeated Sarah Logan @ 1:25 via Submission [NR]

Charlotte vs. Ruby Riott: Charlotte takes control, locks on the figure four but Riott survive and Charlotte fails to beat the clock. Charlotte attacks Becky, leading to…

Becky Lynch vs. Liv Morgan: Liv takes early control, grounding Lynch but Lynch fights back but can’t get the arm bar. She then cradles Liv for the win and beats the clock. Becky Lynch defeated Liv Morgan @ 1:19 via pin [NR] This felt like a complete waste of the beat the clock gimmick since it wasn’t for anything, but did a spectacular job of making the Riott Squad look like complete geeks again.

Finn Balor vs. Lashley & Jinder Mahal: If Balor wins, he gets an IC Title shot at WrestleMania. I love commentary asking if Balor has a real chance here, already forgetting that he beat Lio & Lashley in the same style match to win the IC Title. Lio won’t be working the match, since he’s not medically cleared due to Braun’s assault last week. This went from bad to worse real quick. Lashley attacks at the bell, but Balor fights off Mahal &The Singhs until Lio trips him to the floor. 47-seconds and we already had three guys interfering. Post break and Balor fights back, dropkicks Mahal, and runs him into Lashley. Balor runs wild, the Singhs trip him up but Balor dumps the heels and follows with a tope. The double stomp finishes Mahal. Finn Balor defeated Lashley & Jinder Mahal @ 5:50 via pin [**] This was ok, with Balor working hard and picking up the win to get a title shot.

– Lashley kills Mahal & The Singhs post match.

– Elias is already in NYC, hyping his musical performance at Mania. Some random guitar dude arrives and interrupts him.

Aleister Black & Ricochet vs. Champions The Revival: They brawl right away with Black & Ricochet controlling and clearing the ring. The Revival isolate Black, grounding him and taking control back. Black fights back, tags in Ricochet and they run wild with double teams. They follow with dives. Post break and the champions are back in control, working over Ricochet. Ricochet starts to fight back, but is cut off by double teams for 2. Ricochet keeps fighting, Dash in and Ricochet hits the neck breaker. We get wholesale tags, Black runs wild with strikes and kicks. The moonsault press follows and Dawson then eats a flurry of strikes. It breaks down, Ricochet blind tags in as Black hits black mass; the 630 finishes it. Aleister Black & Ricochet defeated Champions The Revival @ 9:45 via pin [***] This was a good and fun match, likely setting up a tag title match for Mania. It would mean more if the Revival hadn’t lost so many times as champions already.

– Drew McIntyre arrives. McIntyre wants an answer regarding his challenge to Roman Reigns for a Mania match. “You My have beaten leukemia, but at Mania, you won’t beat me.” McIntyre says that he single-handedly ended the Shield. He hopes he says no so he doesn’t put his family through hell again. McIntyre will stay here until he gets his answer. Reigns arrives, and says Roman accepts your challenge, but Joe says, “Never run your mouth about my wife and kids,” leading to the brawl. Roman beats his ass until McIntyre hits a low blow and claymore.

– Drew walks and runs into Dean Ambrose backstage. Dean wants a match tonight, a last man standing match.

Sasha Banks w/Bayley vs. Natalya w/Beth Phoenix: They lock up, working into some back and forth until Natalya locks on the Romero special. Banks escapes, hits knee strikes and covers for 2. Natalya cuts her off, but Banks fights off the sharpshooter. They bawl to the floor, and Banks hits a head scissors. Post break and Natalya is working a back breaker but Banks counters into a sunset flip for 2. Banks then trips up Natalya, the Banks statement follows, but Natalya counters into a sharp shooter. Banks fights and sends Natalya to the buckles. Tamina & Nia Jax attack for the no contest. Sasha Banks vs. Natalya went to a no contest @ 7:27 [**½] This was an solid match, but Tamina & Nia Jax still serve no purpose and have no claim to be involved in a title match; they are losers and are shit in the ring.

– Beth fights then off and hits the glam slam on Tamina

– The Hart Foundation (Bret & Jim) are going into the WWE Hall of Fame.

– Kurt Angle talks about tonight’s match with Joe. Angle puts over Joe, and says he needs to leave on his own terms with true tests like Joe. Corbin arrives and runs down Angle as old and busted.

– Sasha & Bayley say they will take on anyone for the titles, if they are all coming for them, they will face them all at Mania..

A Moment of Bliss: Alexa brings out Braun Strowman & the geeks from weekend update to try and smooth things over between the two sides. Bliss discusses all of the destruction that Braun has done during his career, and he seems pleased about it. The SNL geeks appear via satellite, and Braun wants to kill them. Jost keeps digging his grave with insulting comments, and Braun wants Jost in the Andre battle royal. Both geeks are now in the battle royal, what a way to shit on Braun two Manias in a row. FUCK OFF! This stuff sucks, if these geeks end up costing/eliminating Braun from the Andre…

– Back to Elias at MSG, he’s obviously looking for a spot in the Honor RAMBO.

Baron Corbin vs. Apollo Crews: JIP with Crews picking up near falls. He follows with a moonsault to the floor, but Corbin cuts him off and back in and covers for 2. Vince is in Graves’ ear as he’s burying “Cheeto eating keyboard warriors” over Corbin vs. Angle backlash. Crews fights back but runs into end of days for the win. Baron Corbin defeated Apollo Crews @ 2:45 via pin [NR] Corbin won as he should since he has a Mania match, but it also makes last week’s loss look even stupider.

– Next week, Becky, Charlotte, & Rousey face the Riott Squad. TAG TEAM PARTNERS THAT DON’T GET ALONG BRO – Vince Russo

Seth Rollins Talks: Rollins talks about how different he and Brock are. Rollins wants to be the champion, a man that inspires people unlike Brock. Rollins loves meeting with the fans and spending time with them, and they have all been telling him to beat Brock at Mania. He has no choice, he needs to beat Brock and will take out the bully. Rollins has an army behind him and is unstoppable, and will burn suplex city to the ground. Heyman arrives and thanks Rollins for informing him of his plans to team with the WWE Universe. Heyman mocks Rollins and says that Rollins has no idea how to beat Brock. Brock will win, and hopes Rollins takes it personally when he loses. Rollins chases Heyman up the ramp, Heyman begs off and Rollins says he’s here to answer the thoughts and prayers, not ask for them because “we” will beat Brock and burn down Suplex city.

– Joe cuts a promo noting that he’s not very sentimental, but wants to put Angle to sleep one last time.

US Champion Samoa Joe vs. Kurt Angle: Joe just head butts Angle in the face, shades of TNA right there. Joe grounds things, hits a basement dropkick and dumps Angle. The elbow suicida follows. Post break and Joe is still in control. He lays in strikes and chops, the jabs then connect but Angle counters into rolling Germans for 2. Joe fights off the Angle slam, and hits the running boot and senton for 2. Angle fires up and hits the Angle slam for 2. Joe fights off the ankle lock, but Angle fights off the muscle buster and hits a missile dropkick. The straps are down, they trade strikes and Joe locks on the clutch. Angle fights and counters into a cradle for the win. Kurt Angle defeated US Champion Samoa Joe @ 8:00 via pin [***] I’m not a fan of Joe dropping another non-tile match, but it plays well into Kurt’s retirement tour and the match was good for the time given.

The H’s Talk: HHH thanks the fans and congratulates the women on main eventing Mania. He has a letter from Batista’s lawyer, and has to agree to one last stipulation for the match to take place at Mania. HHH reminds him that Evolution took Batista from deacon to world champion. HHH then claims Batista left when he realized he couldn’t beat Cena. The new stipulation is that Batista wants HHH to put his in-ring career on the line. HHH says that this is another instance of Batista trying to quit. HHH says if he can’ beat a douche bag like Batista, he has no business in the ring and agrees.

– Back to Elias in NYC. Someone steals the money from his guitar case and runs. Dude then sneaks back and steals the guitar case as well.

Drew McIntyre vs. Dean Ambrose: They brawl at the bell with Ambrose dumping Drew. Ambrose misses a top rope attack, allowing Drew to attack. Post break and Ambrose flies into a kendo stick shot. Drew then beats on him with it, but Ambrose battles back and dumps him to the floor. Drew cuts him off on the floor and nails him with the steps. Back in and Drew has a chair, wedges it in the corner but Ambrose slams him into it and hits dirty deeds. Ambrose follows with strikes, gets a table, but Drew slams him through the table in the corner. The claymore ends Ambrose. Drew McIntyre defeated Dean Ambrose @ 9:50 [***] The match was good with McIntyre continuing to roll and pick up momentum ahead of Mania; bye Dean?

– End scene.

– Thanks for reading.

The 411 on Wrestling Podcast returns to the 411 Podcasting Network for episode 6. On today’s show, 411’s Larry Csonka is joined by Steve Cook Jr III. On the show, the guys discuss AJ Styles re-signing with WWE, Kurt Angle vs. Baron Corbin, the Good Brothers possibly leaving WWE, Jim Ross possibly going to AEW, Impact & OVW working together again and Rob Gronkowkski possibly heading to WWE. The show is approximately 70 minutes long.

* Intro
* AJ Styles Re-Signs With WWE: 2:30
* Kurt Angle is facing Baron Corbin at WrestleMania & people shit all over it: 13:30
* Kurt Angle faces AJ Styles on Smackdown this week: 22:00
* Luke Gallows and Karl Anderson done with WWE?: 31:15
* Jim Ross to All Elite Wrestling?: 38:00
* WWE has announced that they will move its global headquarters to a new location in Stamford, Connecticut: 46:00
* Impact & OVW: 47:45
* Wrestling Tournaments: 50:50
* Rob Gronkowkski Retired: 59:20

You can subscribe and listen to the 411 on Wrestling Podcast via the
above player on Transistor, or on the following platforms:

* iTunes
* Spotify
* Stitcher

5.5

The final score: review Not So Good

The 411

This week’s Raw was another flat show on the road to WrestleMania. It’s not that the WrestleMania card looks bad by any means, but the build on the Raw side just isn’t doing much for me at all.