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August 4, 2020 | Posted by Jeremy Thomas
Moose vs. Heath Impact

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Hello, wrestling watchers! We’re back for more fun and games at the Impact arena. As usual, I’m Jeremy and y’all know how this works. Last week on Impact we saw the Good Brothers’ first match as they beat RENO Scum, while Heath managed to finagle himself a shot at Moose’s “title” and an Impact Wrestling contract. In addition, Eddie Edwards defended the World Title against Trey, Jordynne Grace returned to chase Deonna Purrazzo, and Katie Forbes still needs acting lessons. This week we’ve got plenty of action including another World Championship Match, the aforementioned Moose vs. Heath match and more, so lets get to it!

As a reminder, the GoFundMe for Larry’s daughters is still active and if you can make a donation, that would be awesome. Thank you so much to everyone who’s done so thus far.

* Previously on Impact: Eddie Edwards faces Trey and successfully defends the Impact World Title, after which Eric Young shows up. Ethan Carter III promises to destroy his past, while Heath gets promised a potential roster slot and Deonna Purrazzo faces Kimber Lee before Grace shows back up. And finally, the Good Brothers beat Thornstowe and Luster before brawling their way out of the arena with Ace Austin and Madman Fulton.

WE OWN THE NIGHT! (AKA Title Sequence!)

TNA World Championship Match:
Heath vs. Moose

I’m extremely interested to see how Heath works in the ring outside of WWE. We get the Dave Penzer intro and Heath still hasn’t taken off the sunglasses until the title gets held up. The bell rings and we get a lockup, with Heath pushed into the corner and yelled at. Heath with a shove and he fires off with punches, then clotheslines Moose out of the ring. He comes off the ropes and nails Moose off the apron, then heads out of the ring and takes it to the “champ.” He slams Moose into the guardrail, but Moose turns it around and does the same to Heath. Moose slams Heath into the apron, tries it again but Heath reverses it and then measures Moose for a pinch. We’re at seven but Moose with a shot and rolls Heath in. Heath with a dropkick on Moose and we’re back outside where Heath pounds on Moose and sends him weakly into the ring post. Heath rolls Moose in, enters the ring and picks Moose up for a measured shot and a kick. Whip off the ropes, Moose reverses, Heath with a kick but Moose hits a Snake-Eyes to hang him against the top rope. Moose now in control and he chokes Heath against the middle rope. Heath with a weak kick as Moose chokes him with his boot. Moose with a whiplash throat-first into the bottom rope and he picks Heath up, but Heath fights back and comes off the ropes — right into a dropkick. Pin attempt gets two. Moose stomps on Heath but lets him up and Heath fights back with punches, then comes off the ropes into a pump kick. Moose grabs Heath and pounds into his head. Madison and Josh are acting like Heath didn’t control the opening few minutes of this match which is weird. Moose with a shot to the lower back, and he talks trash before raking the eyes with his knee. Heath whipped into the turnbuckle and he’s down as Moose celebrates. He pulls Moose up, yells in his face and goes for a kick but Heath catches it, stands up, punches to Moose and he comes off the rope to stagger Moose with a forearm. And a second one, but a third is cut off with a kick to the cut. They both come off the ropes, big knee by Heath, side kick and a pin attempt gets two. Forearm to Moose in the corner, Moose whips Heath into the opposite corner and charges in but Heath with a roll-up for two. Moose charges again, Heath out of the way and Moose is shoulder-first into the corner. Punches by Heath, he slingshot whips Moose back into the corner and the ref gets flattened. Heath with the Wake-Up Call and he goes for a pin but there’s no ref! He goes to wake the referee up, picks Moose up but Moose with a low blow and rolls Heath up with a handful of tights and gets the win.

Winner: Moose (8:54)
Rating: ** 1/2
Thoughts: Good match with some really weird commentary choices. They did a good job building up the sympathy for Heath, but it also undersells him if they act like he hasn’t done anything to Moose until late in the game. Heath looked really good in there and was the closest thing to beating Moose in several months. I know not everyone loves the guy, but he has an ability to get people behind his character and if Impact can harness that, they’ve got something.

* Josh Mathews and Madison Rayne promote Emergence which is starting in two weeks and will feature Jordynne Grace’s rematch for the Knockouts Title. Meanwhile, tonight Chris Bey and Rohit Raju will face TJP and Fallah Baah, while we get MORE WRESTLE HOUSE and the Motor City Machine Guns have a sit-down interview. Eddie Edwards’ World Title defense is teased, as well as Rich Swann’s update on his status and future.

* Gia Miller is backstage with Willie Mack and asks if he knows what Swann’s big announcement will be. Mack says they’re close but that Swann’s been keeping this one close. Mack doesn’t get Eric Young and says that Young acted like a dirtbag by hurting Swann right as he came back from recovery. He has things to say about Young but he can’t say them on TV. He says he’s here for Swann.

* Back from break and we get EC3’s new video with clips of his famous Impact opponents: Sting, Angle, Styles, Joe, and Roode. He says he’s achieved everything he’s wanted and had a moment of perfection, but he’s been punished by everyone including “the true top 1% of this industry” for the name he inherited. He’s destroying his past and talks about how the TNA Heavyweight Championship. He plans to reclaim the TNA World Heavyweight Championship and burn its legacy. He says Moose has been warned.

* Jimmy Jacobs is in the ring and introduces the new Impact World Tag Team Champions, the MCMGs. They hit the ring and pose with their titles and then take a seat. Jacobs congratulates them on their win and asks what brought them back. Shelley says he’s known them for half his life and they’ve put a of blood, sweat of tears into pro wrestling. It’s been eight years since they’ve teamed here, but he feels like their hard work is paying off and they returned to challenge themselves. Shelley said that they went their separate ways, and he’s proud of what they both separately did. He says what he’s most proud of is Sabin’s resilience and calls him a modern medical miracle. Sabin talks about how the only guy he could call when he trained for his return was Shelley, and that as they trained they realized they still had that in-ring chemistry. They felt like they had to find out if they could still compete in the tag landscape and run down the Impact tag teams. Shelley says The North is the best, and Sabin says that’s what they say, and tell them that over and over.

Cue The North’s music, and the former champs come out. Alexander says he’s not sorry to interrupt and says Impact had over a year to let The North tell their story but they didn’t get that, and the MCMGs are getting preferential treatment, the same kind that got them their title shot while The North had to fight their way to the titles. Alexander gives credit to where credit is due because they beat The North. Page suddenly grabs the mic and rants about how they didn’t beat The North; they beat the North at a fraction of The North. He talks about having the longest reign as champions and said they didn’t turn down a single team and they decimated the whole division. Alexander says they get a rematch, and Shelley gets on his mic and says they learned a lesson: you can’t be champions forever. He acknowledges their rematch and calls Page a guy who raided Rick Martel’s wardrobe and Alexander Rick Steiner Jr. He says they can have their rematch whenever they want, and could do it right now if they want. Page says they competed at 40% and aren’t ready yet. Alexander says he’s right and that they’ll get their rematch when they’re at 100%. They’re facing the Guns at Impact Emergence.

* Backstage Kimber Lee walks into Deonna Purrazzo’s dressing room without knocking and Deonna’s pissed. Kimber says that this is a courtesy call because Lee was front-row for Grace’s assault of Purrazzo, and if that happens at Impact Emergence she won’t be champ anymore. Lee has an idea: they make magic together and Lee takes out Jordynne with one catch: after she does, she gets a shot at the title. Deonna says it’s a deal and we’re off to break.

* Back from break and IT’S WRESTLE HOUSE TIME! We get the goofy ’90s intro that is absolute life and then cut to Taya ushering everyone into the main room for a house meeting. Taya says she had an eye-opening experience last week when she opened a door into Abyss and says they’re trapped but not making the most of it. Cousin Jake and Larry almost fight over a seat but Susie makes them agree to a truce, and asks if she can sit next to Jake. Taya says in the confessional cut it’s not her fault that everyone she’s trapped in her against has bad hygiene. In the house meeting, she says they can get to know everyone and get rid of some BO, which Swinger interprets as Bob Orton. Grooming kits are passed out and Alisha girl talks with Susie about Jake while Kylie asks when they’re getting back to the Impact Zone because she has a title shot. Rosemary says that they leave when John E. takes a hint. Alisha tells Susie that she needs to learn how to use her feminine wiles to seduce Jake, while Swinger interjects to say he’s not playing hard to get. Alisha says he couldn’t handle her, and he says he could handle both her and Susie. Cue the arrival of Tommy Dreamer in a “Moose Sucks Eggs” shirt, who says that sounds like a challenge. Taya wants to talk more grooming but it’s MATCH TIME!

Crazzy Steve doesn’t get why Swinger is so jazzed, and Swinger says he has a lot to learn. It’s the Swingman Special, two-for-one deal. And we’re on break!

* Back from break and it’s match time.

Alisha Edwards & Susie vs. Johnny Swinger

Alisha and Johnny argue in the ring and Alisha grabs Cody, the ref’s, beer. She tells Susie that you have to be mean and show them that you can be intense, and that leads into some trash talking and posing by Swinger, so Alisha and Susie grab him for a double legsweep. Johnny wants to hook up but they double boot him, them send him into the ropes and he comes off to put his arms around the both of them. Eww. Double Russian legsweep, they each take a leg and Swinger’s totally into it until they make him do the splits. They come off the ropes for a double splash and it’s over.

Winner: Alisha Edwards & Susie (1:46)
Rating: N/R
Thoughts: I know it’s comedy but this wasn’t particularly funny. Swinger walks a fine line between creepy and funny, and he didn’t walk it that well this time around.

In the house, John E. is picking up the hygiene kits when Kylie shows up and is introducing herself, but Bravo doesn’t have time for this. Kylie doesn’t normally like interjecting herself, but says they can’t leave until he takes the hint. She’s sad and she doesn’t like to see people mad at each other. Bravo says he can take a hint and walks off.

* The Impact Flashback Moment of the Week is Sami Callihan beating Cage to capture the Impact World Title in a steel cage on Impact’s AXS TV debut. And this one was actually a moment and not a full segment as recent Flashback Moments have been!

* The Good Brothers are walking to their car and find the door open and their beers drunk. A police officer shows up and sees the open beers and accuses them of breaking the law. They say it wasn’t them and they just saw them coming up. Ace Austin shows up and says it’s clearly them. An argument starts and Doc starts choking Ace. When the cop grabs him he bumps him and immediately apologizes, but Doc is getting arrested. Ace says it’s a tough break and be more careful with their beers next time.

* Back from break and we get another vignette for Brian Myers’ impending arrival.

Impact World Title Match:
Eddie Edwards vs. Sami Callihan

Before the match can start, RVD attacks Sami with a chair and stomps him while Katie twerks over him. RVD beats on Sami some more and they head off as officials tend to Sami. Sami gets up, shoves everyone off and is going to compete despite the attack. He insists he’s good to do this and smacks Eddie, and the bell rings.

Eddie nails Sami, goes for a Tiger Driver and gets a two-count right off the bat. Josh brings up the Sami/Eddie bat incident as Eddie chokes Sami against the corner and then hits kneedrops to the back of Sami’s head in the center of the ring. He picks Sami up and headbutts him, then charges into the corner with an avalanche. He goes back to the opposite corner and dives in, Sami out of the way and Eddie ends up all the way outside the ring. Sami with a dive through the bottom ropes and takes Eddie out. He sends Eddie back into the ring but Eddie off the ropes into a dive to the outside of his own! Eddie slams Sami’s head into the guardrail, then they trade a couple of shots before Eddie pulls Sami onto the apron. Eddie looks for the Tiger Driver on the apron but Sami with a rake to the eyes and he hits a piledriver on the apron. The ref begins the count as Sami picks Eddie up into a front facelock, then slams Eddie into the guardrail. The ref tells them to bring it inside and Sami says to get out of his face, then chops Eddie hard against the guardrail. Eddie rolls into the ring and Sami follows in, gives a positively deranged look and hits an elbowdrop for two. Sami with a crossface that quickly turns to raking the face. He picks Eddie up, nails him with a shot and then locks in a headlock with a trapped arm. Eddie fights out but gets hit by Sami. They trade boots off the ropes and then a double clothesline takes them both down. They’re both slow to get up, hanging on each other, and Sami with a punch before he offers Eddie a shot. They trade blows, Sami gets the advantage and chops the shit out of Sami, Blue Thunder powerbomb gets two. Eddie is up and he pulls Sami up, goes for the Tiger Driver but Sami counters with a backdrop. Eddie rolls through but eats a kick. Callihan with a brain buster for two! Sami with a little headbutt and he picks Eddie up, nails a big shot but Eddie fires back with a serious kick. Eddie hits a chop, comes off the ropes into a GTS and a running forearm that gets a near-fall. Sami gets Edwards up, off the ropes but Eddie with a forearm to the head, another to the back of the head, a kick and the Tiger Driver gets a near-fall! Sami gets a slap to the face, piledriver and he covers for two before Eddie’s foot gets on the ropes. Sami goes under the ring and gets a chair, he tosses it into the ring as the ref yells at him. Sami threatens the ref with it and takes aim at Eddie, but throws it out and the Boston Knee Party takes Sami down. A second one and Eddie gets the pin!

Winner: Eddie Edwards (11:54)
Rating: ** 3/4
Thoughts: Eddie Edwards and Sami Callihan are always magic in the ring. This match wasn’t perfect by any measure, but that was in the set-up and not the ring work. I don’t like that they did the RVD attack and then didn’t do anything to sell it; the announcers literally didn’t mention it afterward. They felt like two unconnected segments which was weird. Other than that, this was a good match that I dug the hell out of.

* Back to WRESTLE HOUSE, where Kylie asks John E. if he’s okay. Bravo has his bag and goes to leave Wrestle House. Rosemary and Taya are both looking for John E. while Steve plays Marco Polo. They ask Kylie if she’s seen John E. and she says he left. Taya asks why and Rosemary accuses her of saying something to him. She mentions the “taking hints” convo and Rosemary is not happy. At all. She screams for Tommy and it’s MATCH TIME once we’re back from break!

Rosemary vs. Kylie Rae

In the ring and Taya is the referee. Rosemary and Taya both mock Kylie and Rosemary attacks from behind, then beats her down and chokes her on the ground. Kylie ducks a punch, flips Rosemary over into a side headlock and Taya yells for Rosemary to get up. Rosemary with a leg headlock, but Kylie turns it into a front-facing leglock and she slaps Rosemary in the face, then gets a slow two-count pin. Taya complains that her hand hurts, and Kylie plays the “I Got Your Nose!” game. Rosemary is buying it and she yells at Taya to get it back. Taya points out that it’s a trick and Rosemary calls Kylie a liar, then takes her down. Professional wrestling, folks. Rosemary stomps at Kylie, and maybe its just the fact that I ship the fuck out of them but I swear Taya just flirted with Rosemary. Rosemary chokes Kylie against the bottom rope, but Kylie dodges a charge and hits a chop. Cannonball into the corner, Taya with a SUPER slow two-count. Kylie argues with Taya and then picks Rosemary up, Rosemary fights back and hits a spear off the ropes. Fast-count pinfall gets two. Rosemary lies in wait and John E. is there now cheering for Rosemary and distracting her; she turns around into a superkick and even a slow count gets Kylie the win.

Winner: Kylie Rae (4:33)
Rating: * 3/4
Thoughts: It’s the best Wrestle House match yet. Would love to see these two in a real match at some point.

After the match, John E. checks on Rosemary. Rosemary says Kylie may have said something and John E. says she didn’t, he’s known what’s been going on for a while. He’s torn because Taya’s done a lot for her and he likes her a lot, but if she found out about them… Rosemary says that she doesn’t have to know, just before Taya comes over and berates Bravo then throws him out of the ring. We cut to Rosemary in the confessional room: “As Long. As. It Takes.”

* Backstage Karl Anderson says he’s on his way to get Doc out and Ace shows up to do some mocking. That leads to Anderson just attacking. Fulton shows up and they take control, double-teaming Anderson and beating him down. Fulton gets Karl up and Ace lays in with his walking stick a couple of times. The heels walk off as Anderson is on the ground, and we’re off to break.

* Back from break and Hernandez isn’t happy about the Rhino thing. He says that if RENO Scum help him get his money back, he’ll make it more than worth their while. They’re down with that idea.

Chris Bey & Rohit Raju vs. TJP and Fallah Baah

Bey starts against TJP and they lock up, some counter wrestling that ends with Bey holding TJP in a wristlock. TJP flips out into a headscissors, which Bey gets out of and sends TJP into the ropes only for TJP to hit a bodyblock. Bey with his own headscissors and he whips TJP into a corner, charges in but TJP floats over. Off the ropes and he ducks a clothesline, they come to a stop and TJP fakes Bey into missing a dropkick. TJP folds Bey and pops the arm, Rohit runs in but gets tagged by Baah. Baah tagged in, Rohit gets double teamed with a front lungblower and a belly to belly. Bey runs in, gets double hiptossed and we’re off to break.

Back from break and Baah with a bodyslam on Bey. He tags in TJP, they go for a double team move but Raju breaks it up and Bey with a heel kick as Baah ends up outside the ring. Bey beats on TJP, pinfall gets two. Raju tagged in and he trips TJP up, kick to the head gets two and he locks in a standing armlock. TJP trying to get to the ropes but Raju stops him. He picks TJP up and drops him, comes off the ropes into a running knee for two. He gets TJP up and whips him into the corner, tags Bey in and Bay with a charging forearm uppercut. He gets a knee to the spine and stretches the arms, TJP up and flips into a donkey kick. Tornado DDT takes Bey down, TJP tags in Baah. Raju in but he gets tackled down. Bah dodges kicks and sends Raju into the corner, avalanche attempt and Rohit with a high knee to stop Baah in his tracks. They go for the tags, Bey and TJP in. TJP with a baseball slide kick to Rohit, inverted atomic drop, he comes off with a springboard forearm. Suplex, back suplex and TJP up to the top. Rohit grabs TJP but gets fought off, Bey rolls away from the Swanton and hits a kick, Rohit with a diving front face slam, Bey with the pin but Baah breaks it up. Rohit gets Baah out of the ring, Raju picks TJP up and Bey comes off the ropes but Baah pulls Raju out of the ring and TJP turns a Bey springboard into an armbreaker and Bey taps!

Winner: TJP and Fallah Baah (7:19)
Rating: ** 1/4
Thoughts: That’s the best tag match TJP and Baah have been in for a while, while Bey and Rohit held up their end nicely. It played well as a good, classic sort of match with a bit of innovative wrestling. I have no complaints.

* When we come back, Rich Swann talks.

* Rich Swann comes down to the ring on crutches to discuss his future, and we get a recap of Eric Young’s assault on Swann at Slammiversary. Swann gets a mic and says he said last week on Impact he was going to come here and make an announcement. He moves to the center of the ring and says that with hard work and dedication and heart, love, and support, he was able to become a pro wrestler. He was able to look at the naysayers, the doubters, and live his dream. Swann says that in January he got one of the most severe injuries of his career; he blew out all of his ankle, fractured his fibula and his L5 and L6. He went to the doctor and the doc said he’d probably be walking with a limb for the rest of his life which would be no more wrestling. So he went home and busted his ass, worked as hard as he could to prove the doctor wrong. Months went by, he’d come to Impact and get the itch and he could feel himself healing and getting better, getting stronger. He went to the doctor, he got an MRI and the doctor said maybe he was wrong because Swann was ready to go. It was a matter of heart and willpower, and motivation for Slammiversary. He saw a vacant spot open for the World Title match and knew he was ready to claim it. And as soon as he got the okay, he was in the main event. In the match, he gave his all, he gave his heart. He pinned Eric Young, and thought he was going to go on and compete more with Ace Austin and Eddie Edwards, but jealousy and hate ruined that because Eric got jealous and the seven months of his sitting at home all came back when EY stomped his leg in the chair.

Swann takes a moment to collect himself and says that he’s right back at square one where he was at seven months ago in the orthopedic’s office. The doctor said that this time it’s a little different. If he is to get back in the ring, his life may change. The doctor told him with the injury he has, he won’t live a normal life if he continues to put his body through what he does. That brings him to his decision. He has to think about his family, his future, and he’s going to have to retire. He wants to thank all the boys and girls in the back who bust their ass every week, the production team, the commentators: from the bottom of his heart, thank you. It’s been a good 15 years, and he hopes he made a lasting impact in the industry. He says he loves everyone, sets down the mic and goes to exit. Out come Willie Mack, Eddie Edwards and the rest of the locker room. They pound on the apron for him in respect and applaud for him. He goes to exit the ring and the Rascalz get the ring to help him exit. Swann is super-emotional and slowly exits the ring with help from the guys. Edwards and Mack hug him and he slowly makes his way toward the back as everyone applauds for him. He stops and looks back AND HERE’S ERIC YOUNG WITH AN ATTACK! He grabs the crutch, slams it on Swann’s leg and runs off. The roster runs after him as the Rascalz, Edwards and Mack tend to an agonized Swann and we go to black.

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Impact Wrestling, Jeremy Thomas