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January 22, 2019 | Posted by Tony Acero
Smackdown 1-22-19

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I bet you thought you seen the last of me…

The brand is blue, and you’re stuck with the AJ Lee Loving chick magnet, Tony Acero!! Woo hoo!

The Man starts us off lookin all kinds of adorable. She claims it’s good to be back in town. She loves standing in this ring and fighting, but The Man has something to say. Now that everyone has an opinion on what she should be, she is saying this: The only thing The Man should be doing is main eventing Wrestlemania and slappin the heads off of everyone in her way to get there. That journey starts in 5 days. She brings up Asuka, and calls her one of the best in the world, but Becky is better. Asuka never beat her for the title, and the fact that this doesn’t bother Asuka tells her enough. She and the other women have been warming themselves up on the fire that she lit. She has dethroned the Queen, and she will break the empress.

Asuka has heard enough.

She comes down to yell in Japanese at Becky. She continues her tirade until Charlotte Flair’s music hits. Oh joy.

Charlotte comes out in her Louis Vuitton belt and talks about winning the Rumble, and when she does, she’s got some choices. She says she’s beaten Sasha so many times, she’s lost count. She beat the holy hell out of Ronda with Ken (what she call’s Kendo stick). She brings up Asuka, and breaking her undefeated streak, and finally Becky, The Man. Charlotte calls herself the main event.

Asuka attacks Becky Lynch for some reason. They fight back and forth. Charlotte watches on the ramp. Refs come down to break the fight up as Charlotte watches on. Agents separate Becky, but its short-lived. Becky rushes Asuka Asuka sends her into the barricade as refs continue to try and hold her back. Becky with a knee. She clubs the back then sends Asuka into the announcers over the table. Becky removes her jacket and whips Asuka with it over and over. Becky climbs the table and flies off with a clothesline.

Refs finally get Becky to walk to the back as some trainers help the screaming Asuka. She is pissed.

Back from the break, and Becky and Asuka are still going at it in the back! Refs and agents hold each of them back as they scream at each other.

Before the first match can start, Naomi leaves the ring to attack Mandy. She grabs her and tosses her face-first into the apron then tosses her into the ring.

Match 1: Mandy Rose vs Naomi

The bell rings and Mandy hits a slap, but Naomi gets back on the offense with a bunch of hard slaps to the face. Mandy rolls to the outside and Naomi stands in the ring, awaiting her. We get a preview for a movie about an evil kid while Mandy hops onto the apron. Naomi gets sent into the corner and Mandy stomps her down. Mandy backs up, still reeling from the onslaught on her face. This allows Naomi to kick out of the corner then hit a low clothelsine. Leg drop from Naomi and a pin for 1..2..NO!!! She works the arm from behind as Mandy continues to check on her mouth. Naomi pulls back on the arm then sends Mandy’s face into the mat. Naomi stands up and hits a body slam on Mandy then a split leg drop into a pin or 1..2.NO!! She locks the head of Mandy from the front. Naomi whips, it’s reversed, Naomi slides and lands on the apron. Kick to Mandy, kick to Sonya. Mandy kicks Naomi off the apron Mandy goes to the outside and sends naomi right back in. Cover for 1..2..no!! Mandy mounts then hits a few right hands. Mandy with a sleeper hold from behind.

We go back to full screen and Naomi hits a high kick to the side of the head. Clothesline from Naomi. Spinning uppercut from Naomi. Clothesline from Mandy. Cover for 1….2…NO!!! Mandy with some kicks to Naomi. She drives her shin into the neck of Naomi. Mandy with some right hands in the corner. Naomi stops Mandy with her feet then kicks her in the head again. Kick to the chest from Naomi. Right hands to Mandy. Over and over. Mandy shoves her. Naomi hops up with a hurricanrana. Naomi rushes the ropes, hops over and lands on the apron. Naomi shoves Mandy. She shoves the ref on accident.

Naomi looks to springboard, but Sonya grabs the foot. Mandy grabs Naomi and sends her face-first into the corner hard. Mandy covers. 1..2….3!!!

Winner: Mandy Rose
Naomi’s got the athleticism, but this match was relatively average.
Match Quality: **
Personal Enjoyment: *
Total Rating:

JImmy comes in to help Naomi after her loss, but Naomi is noticeably frustrated.

We get a promo from Rey who talks about his 2006 Royal Rumble presence. He shifts to Andrade and tells him that in order to gain respect, it needs to be earned.

Backstage, Miz is hyping himself up. Shane walks up to ask if he’s ready. They walk.

Here’s Mandy Rose doin Mandy Rose things:

Match 2: Cesaro vs The Miz

Sheamus distracts and Cesaro comes in with a bunch of sick ass uppercuts. Damn. He beats Miz across the ropes until Miz falls to the mat. Cesaro deadlifts Miz and tosses him with a gutwrench. Cesaro lifts Miz up and side headlocks up. He wrenches it. Miz backs him into the ropes .Cesaro hops over then catches Miz in the MIDDLE OF THE FUCKING AIR AND DROPS HIM HARD WITH A SLAM! Pin for 1..2..NO!!!! Elbow out of the corner from Cesaro. He shoots the legs and lits but Miz floats over and quickly locks in the Figure Four!!! Cesaro rolls towards the ropes and gets to the outside. Miz follows and Sheamus makes him pay for it! Cesaro is there to clotheslnie him down!

Back from the break, and Miz got the upperhand somehow. He rushes from one corner to the other with a dropkick then a seated clothesline to Cesaro. Miz goes for a cover. 1..2..NO!!!! Ringside, Sheamus just trucks Shemaus. In the ring, Miz rolls up Cesaro. He gets 1….2…NO!!! Cesaro locks Miz up on the ropes. Cesaro distracts the ref. Sheamus kicks Miz in the face. Cesaro with The Neutralizer! Pin for 1..2..3!!!!

Winner: Cesaro
Man, Cesaro is just so good. So crisp.
Match Quality: **1/2
Personal Enjoyment: **1/2
Total Rating: **1/2

After the match, Shane attacks Sheamus!!! He turns to Cesaro and sends him into the ringpost! Shane removes the items from the announce table and lays Cesaro on top of it. Shane goes to the top rope. He is about to dive, but Sheamus shoves him off. Cesaro grabs Shane and lifts him up. Sheamus with a Brogue Kick!!! Miz rushes over and covers Shane! Sheamus and Cesaro beat on Miz’s back then grab him and place him on the announce table. They grab Shane and powerbomb him onto Miz through the table.

This girl loves Cesaro…

We are back to Smackdown, and Vince McMahon is here to strut his way down to the ring.

Vince says Bryan and Styes are two of the most passionate wrestlers in a long time. They will go head to head this Sunday, but here tonight, they will go face to face. First, the man who unquestionably lives up to his moniker, AJ Styles.

He then introduces Bryan, but Bryan opts to stand on the outside of the ring. He claims he is not falling for this trap and refuses to step into the ring with a sociopath. Yeah, the man who tossed him into a bunch of processed animal carcasses. He is too embarrassed to step into the ring with AJ. As he watched AJ encourage these fatties, he had a vision for the future with AJ as champion. That future looks like an ignorant one. An impotent one. An illiterate future. AJ uses his name to get fame and money. Bryan uses his power for the greater good. AJ questions this and says that Bryan is talking like a jackass.

Bryan says AJ makes the crowd laugh and cheer, but they never make them think. He never makes them feel guilty about their actions that they should every day of their lives. He doesn’t care about our feelings. He is not The People’s Champion. Daniel Bryan is The Planet’s Champion. The planet doesn’t need AJ Styles. The planet needs him using his platform to be the planet’s voice. AJ has a word for Bryan: Fickle. Bryan is embarrassed?

Bryan says he is not fickle, in a very fickled manner. AJ says Bryan isn’t embarrased, he’s afraid. AJ has seen that look before. Bryan is afraid. He’s afraid of what’s going to happen in five days. What happens when AJ takes the one thing Bryan has left, and when he takes it, Bryan will have nothing.

Bryan is about to quote someone. McMahon stops him. He is tired of this; it’s getting annoying. He ushers Bryan into the ring. Bryan says that of course Vince doesn’t want to hear this, he and the entire Baby Boomer generation are the great parasites of this world. These people bow to him, but they on’t realize he takes and takes and takes, putting profit over the people and the planet every single time. They bow to him. They bow to Vince for it. It’s like he pulled an illusion where he has concealed all the economical and environmental debt he has created. Vince is hoarding all the wealth while we ignore it because we are distracted. Vince created an environment for someone like AJ becomes a hero, where his ignorance and impotence is the—

Vince yells that he will not tell Bryan again, and to get in the ring.

AJ says if a face to face is what Vince wants, it doesn’t necessarily have to happen in this ring.

Aj leaves the ring andd attacks Bryan! The camera has an aneurysm while filming and AJ sends Bryan into the steps. Aj sends him into the ring. AJ looks for the forearm, but Bryan shoves Vince in front of him. This stops AJ but allows Bryan to hit a running knee to AJ’s face!

Backstage, Truth and Carmella are talking about being in the Rumble. Truth can’t wait to win the Rumble and face Bryan or AJ. Carmella wonders why he won’t choose Brock. Truth does NOT want Brock to take him to Sioux Fall City or Suplex City. He may go after Bobby Murphy. Carmella says there is a weight limit. Truth takes offense and walks away. In comes Charlotte. Carmella wonders why she thinks she can just walk in the Rumble and win. She wasn’t in the last year’s Rumble. It’s a tornado. She reminds Charlotte that she is Number 30. She’s the Gatekeeper in Gucci. Charlotte says she should be confident. But Charlotte is confident too, and the Rumble isn’t the toranado….she is.

Match 3: Samoa Joe vs Mustafa Ali

Joe starts off strong, obviously, muscling Ali into the corner and kicking him out of the ring. Joe follows outside and chops Ali in the chest hard. Joe grabs Ali by the head and tosses him but Ali hops up on the apronand flies off with a flipping crossbody. Joe pushes him away and heads into the ring. Ali enters as well. Dropkick to Joe’s face. He attacks Joe in the corner. Ref holds him back. Joe chops Ali hard in the chest. Headbutt from Joe. Joe grabs Ali. Ali to the apron. Kick to Joe. He goes for a springboard, but Joe shoves him off the ropes, and Ali tumbles down hard.

Back from a break and Joe is beating Ali down. Ali crawls towards him and Joe taunts him, saying he wanted this. Joe with a hard sqwuash in the corner then a pele kick and a cover for 1..2…NO!!! Joe works the head, cinching it from above. Whip from Joe. Ali hops over the apron. Shoves Joe, dives through the ropes. X-Factor. Ali is able to get Joe to the outside. He hits the ropes. Suicide Dive! Joe is on his feet. He runs aroun the ring, near the time keeper. Ali rushes him. Joe sends him over, but Ali lands on his feet atop the barricade. He dives to Joe. Ali sent into the ring. Joe comes in. Kick to Joe. Superkick. ANother. Joe still on his feet!!! Ali off the 2nd rope. Tornado DDT!!! Pin for 1..2…NO!!! He pulls Joe to the corner. Looking to finish it.

Joe is up! He pushes Ali off the corner. The Clutch from Joe!!! ALI TAPS!!!!


Match Quality:
Personal Enjoyment:

Total Rating:

Joe keeps the hold in. He won’t let it go until Ali passes out.

Backstage, New Day is playing pool. They’re watching one of Kofi’s cool non-eliminations. We get new Day asked if they are willing to eliminate each other. They laugh at this. Is Tony Chimel going to ask them next? In comes Tony! Haha. Kofi says they are smart. When one wins the Rumble, they all win the rumble. Big E says that they’re going to dog walk everyone in this Rumble. Ok Cardi E. Kofi then says what if this is the year Kofi can’t keep his feet off the ground. His team members hold his head up, and Kofi has an idea. He won’t be sharing it, though.

Match 1:

Almas starts with a kick an a whip then an elbow to Rey, knocking him down. Push to the ropes. Rey on the shoulders of Almas. Hurricanrana from Rey sends Almas to the outside. Rey springboards off the top corner and locks the head and hits another one on the outside!

Back from a break and Almas sends Rey ove the top rope. Rey lands on the apron. Swinging kick to the face. Rey with a seated enton. Crossbody off the ropes. Pin for 1..2..NO!!! Almas grabs Rey and underhooks, but Rey escapes and hits a destroyer into a pin for 1..2..NO!!! Rey gets to the corner and hops up onto the top rope. He dives with a wheelbarrow, turns it into a roll—but Almas sits and it’s a pin for 1..2..NO!!! Almas pushes Rey over his head, Rey lands on his feet on the 2n rope, Almas drops Rey and his knee hits the corner. Almas to the top rope. Rey is up He crotches Almas! Rey with a chop to the chest. He climbs up and sits Almas on the top rope. Rey is behind him. Almas gets the firemans. Rey fights him down with some elbows. Rey locks the head, but Almas holds onto him!! Rey pulls himself up. Almas climbs to the top rope! POWERBOMB FROM THE TOP ROPE!!! Cover for 1…2….3!!!!

Andrade gets the first fall!

Ref waits for Rey to rise to officially start round 2. Almas with a kick, then he goes for a rope assisted sit-out powerbomb into a pin for 1..2..NO!!! Almas grabs Rey by the head. He sets up for another one, but Rey rolls through with ANOTHER DESTROYER!!! Rey pins! 1….2….3!!!

Rey gets the second fall!

We come back to Almas toppling to the outside. Rey is in the ring. He hits the ropes and slides….right into a headlock, but Rey shoves Almas into the barriacade. Rey with an enziguri. Ref starts the count. He’s at 3 before Rey hops into the ring. Almas gets to 7. Rey hits the ropes. He slides, over Almas, grabs the legs, and sends Almas into the barricade back first!!!! Rey sends Almas into the ring then climbs up the ropes to get on the apron. Rey calls for the senton. He springboards, locks the head, another flip into a pin for 1…2…NO!!! Crowd calls for 619, but Almas stands on the apron. Almas with an arm bar within the ropes! Ref breaks the hold at 4. Almas sends Rey into the corner arm first. He mocks Eddie. Almas lifts Rey works the arm behind Rey. Rey with an elbow but Almas shoves him into the corner Rey stops himself. Almass with a forearm. He dives theough ropes from the apron and Rey kicks him. He goes for yet another destroyer, but Almas lands on his feet. Rey hops onto his shoulders dick first, but Almas sends him into the ringpost back first!! Almas send Rey into the ring. HAMMERLOCK DDT! Pin for 1…2…..NO!!!! Rey has his foot on the ropes!! Almas with an armbar! Rey flips out of it, but Almas keeps hold and takes him back on his stomach. Rey reaches for a rope. He uses his legs but Almas drags him back to the center of the ring. Almas adds pressure to the hold. Rey flips out, Almas locks the fingers. Rey kicks him off, Rey onto the ropes he flips off the ropes and botches a bit, then turns into a pin and goes 1..2..NO!!!! Almas sits REy on his shoulders. He clips the arms off the ropes. Rey falls back. Inverted Hurricanrana! Pin from Rey. 1..2….NO!!!! Rey sets Almas up for the 619! He hits the ropes. 619!!! Rey takes time to stand. He calls for it.

SAMOA JOE RUNS IN AND GRABS REY!!!! He hits a powerbomb to the apron!!!!

Winner: Rey Mysterio via DQ
Solid affair. Ending was bleh.
Match Quality: ***1/2
Personal Enjoyment: ****1/2
Total Rating: ****

Joe enters the ring and grabs Almas. He sends him crashing into the corner. Joe grabs Rey. He locks in the clutch. Joe grabs the mic.

He says he told us that he came here to make a statement. What you see in this ring is exactly what he will do to the other 29 superstars in the Rumble. Because his name is Joe and …..


End Show

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Smackdown, WWE, Tony Acero