Mid-South Wrestling (9.18.1982) Review

-Originally aired September 18, 1982.

-Your hosts are Boyd Pierce and Cowboy Bill Watts. Watts announces that a unique but terrifying-looking new star is on his way to Mid-South, and he knows nothing about this new man except what he’s seen in the piece of video we’re about to watch.

-So we meet Kimala, from the jungles of Uganda. The intangibles here are really interesting if you picture Kamala (the alternate spelling) from his WWF days. He has a different facepaint pattern, he’s about 50-75 pounds lighter than you’re used to seeing him, he has a ring in his nose, and he’s wearing a lot of gold jewelry…all of which comes together to make him look 100 times more terrifying than he looked in later years. Picture Big E shaving his head and relaunching himself as Kimala, and not playing it for laughs at all.

-Jack Curtis, a retired wrestler now promoting house shows for Mid-South, is filling in for Reeser Bowden this week, and sounds a lot more invested in the show than Reeser usually did. Quick research finds that holy crap, Curtis debuted in 1932.

HACKSAW DUGGAN vs. JESSE BARR
-Barr applies an amateur waistlock and rides Duggan, and Duggan can’t handle straight-up wrestling so Barr has the edge. Barr armdrags him around, and Duggan is so frustrated he goes to the floor twice to rethink strategy. Duggan, having considered all options, tries punching and kicking, and now that he’s in his own wheelhouse he takes control. Spear by Duggan, and the tour of the turnbuckles leading into the backbreaker finishes. Pretty good squash!

TED DIBIASE (North American Champion) vs. JOHNNY RICH
-DiBiase armdrags Rich. Rich fights back and slams DiBiase down as Watts says that Rich usually wrestles on Channel 17, but he came to Mid-South just for a shot at DiBiase. Elbow off the second rope by Rich sends DiBiase scurrying to the floor. Back in, Rich cradles him and DiBiase looks frustrated AF. DiBiase starts throwing punches to take control. Backbreaker by DiBiase as Watts talks about Dick Murdoch complaining about nightmares lately because he keeps remembering what a nice kid DiBiase was.

-Rich comes back with a backdrop, so a comebackdrop, I guess. Cradle gets a 2 7/8 count, which is an even igger deal because in Mid-South, you rarely even see more than a one-count in squash matches. DiBiase has had enough of this shit, so he loads the glove and knocks Rich out cold to take the win.

-Skandar Akbar has a fistful of dollars. He’s scheduled to wrestle this week, but he just found out Buck Robley’s on the card too. He puts up a thousand dollars that says he’ll win his squash match faster than Robley will win his.

SKANDAR AKBAR vs. TIM HORNER (without mustache)
-Akbar attackbars from behind, since there’s now a thousand bucks at stake. Horner fights back with rights, but Akbar just keeps coming at him with kicks. Camel clutch gets the submission.

COL. BUCK ROBLEY vs. KELLY KINISKI
-Skandar Akbar heads back to the ring and hands over the thousand dollars to Jack Curtis as a show of good faith. Akbar makes it a point to let us all know that Kiniski is the son of a former NWA Champion, and just to make things REALLY interesting, he offers Kiniski an additional thousand dollars as an incentive. Ring announcer lets us know that the previous match went 2:10, so that’s Robley’s time to beat.

-Akbar gives advice to Kiniski, in a transparent attempt to run out the clock, so Robley dropkicks Kiniski into Akbar. Their heads collide, so Kiniski is knocked senseless and Robley pins him immediately to claim the money. Fun angle all the way around!

TAG TEAM TITLE: JUNKYARD DOG & MR. OLYMPIA (Champions) vs. ONE MAN GANG & KILLER KHAN (with Skandar Akbar)
-Getting the shit kicked out of you singlehandedly by one champion is an interesting way to qualify for the #1 contender slot.

-Gang hammers Olympia down. Olympia fights back and Gang tags out quickly. Khan applies a front facelock, and Olympia makes a tag without him seeing, and JYD throws a hard punch to break the hold. Gang tags back in and JYD picks up where they left off, just taking him down with a single clothesline like he’s nothing. Khan heads back in and chops him down and starts grinding away at his face. Gang comes back in and goes for a piledriver, but JYD backdrops out and tags Olympia back in. Olympia throws dropkicks at everyone, but he’s slow to get back up after one and Gang goes on the offensive with a forearm and a slam.

-Khan comes in and tries to finish with a backbreaker, but it only gets two. Slam off the ropes by the Gang. Pier sixer erupts and in the midst of it, JYD Thumps the Gang and pins him clean as a sheet. Finish was kind of out of nowhere, but still a good high-energy match while it lasted.

MR. WRESTLING II vs. THE GRAPPLER
-Side headlock by II as Bill Watts smells a rat. During the commercial, he noticed fans yelling “That’s not Grappler” and now that they’re in the ring, they’re chanting “We want Grappler.” Headscissors by Grappler, but now Watts agrees with the fans and he doesn’t think that’s actually him.

-II applies a front facelock, but Grappler rams him into the corner repeatedly until II just gives him a hard knee to get him to back off. Grappler punches and snapmares II as Bill Watts dubs him The Questionable Grappler. II goes to work on the leg. Grappler slips out and gives him the knee, then goes for the mask. Referee gets knocked out of the ring during the battle for the mask, and the REAL Grappler shows up and takes over the match. II fights back as the other Grappler comes into the ring. Referee revives, sees both Grapplers, and calls for the DQ to give II the win. Not the direction I thought that finish would go in.

IRON MIKE SHARPE vs. LARRY CLARK
-The sight of Clark makes me wish Jim Cornette was here to do commentary. Full nelson right away by Sharpe as Watts uses a really weird point of reference, calling Sharpe “an Abraham Lincoln-type powerhouse.” Watts announces that the Mongolian Stomper will be debuting soon as Clark throws a few kicks, but Sharpe ain’t having it and clotheslines him. Pildriver gets three.

-We head down to Florida to watch the Mongolian Stomper face Jimmy Johns. What the hell is his finisher called? Spreading the Mayo? Don Carson joins Gordon Solie on commentary and says something racist enough to get the audio muted, and if you’ve ever heard pro wrestling promos from this era, just imagine what would have to qualify as “too racist.” Stomper gets the win, which leads to a montage of Stomper squash match wins, which establish that Stomper is a lethal wrestler, and that eventually he shaved the mustache. He was a dead ringer for Ninja Billy Graham here.

8.1

The final score: review Very Good

The 411

Ah, that's the Mid-South that I know and love!