wrestling / Video Reviews

The Name on the Marquee: World Championship Wrestling (12.24.1988)

December 21, 2018 | Posted by Adam Nedeff
wcw World Championship Wrestling
6.6
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The Name on the Marquee: World Championship Wrestling (12.24.1988)  

-Originally aired Christmas Eve, 1988.

-Your hosts are Tony Schiavone & Jim Ross.

MISTY BLUE & HEIDI LEE MORGAN vs. KAT LEROUX & LINDA DALLAS (with…somebody)

-Blue slams Dallas and works the arm while the commentators confirm that yes, it’s definitely Linda Dallas. Blue, who is the NWA Ladies’ Champion, apparently, switches off with Morgan to stay on the arm to the aggravation of a manager who has yet to be identified.

-Faces rowboat Dallas as the commentators finally identify the manager as Mad Dog Debbie from Havana, Cuba. They picked the milkiest white, blonde woman they could have possibly rounded up for the “daughter of a Cuban cigar mogul” gimmick. And for god’s sake, her name is DEBBIE. Show me the number of times you see that name in the Cuban census figures. Misty Blue works the legs and has a severe case of Ahmed Johnson Syndrome going with the back of her tights. She tags out to give herself a firm crack tug as Kat Leroux works the arm on Morgan and slams her with one arm to get a two-count.

-Heels work the leg as we pause for a break. Back from the break, Misty airplane spins Dallas and comes off the top with a splash, but Mad Dog Debbie attacks with her enormous cane for the DQ, which is pretty silly because Blue clearly had her beaten, so it’s not like Dallas was saving her from anything. JR even tries to BS us during the replay and say that Teddy Long made it a three, so he just declares this a clean win for Misty and Heidi.

-Jim Cornette comes out in his finest green and red suit and says it’s been a bad year for the Midnights. “Nobody likes us in the dressing room we used to use, and we don’t have many friends in the dressing room we’re in now.” Cornette admits to being surprised at the way the fans have stuck up for them and said they’re the REAL Midnight Express, so Cornette thanks them and promises to win at Starrcade to show their appreciation. In the spirit of the holiday, Cornette gives his best wishes to David Crockett, even though he’s not around anymore.

-Unfamiliar music strikes up and JR tells Jim Cornette that the Junkyard Dog is on his way out, so Cornette excitedly asks if he can stay and watch.

JUNKYARD DOG, RICK STEINER, & IVAN KOLOFF vs. KEITH STEINBORN, EDDIE SWEAT, & RANDY HOGAN

-Cornette is instantly the highlight of this match, as Steiner puts him in charge of holding the dog, and Cornette doesn’t want it because he’s afraid Mama’s dog Snuffles will smell the scent of another dog. He keeps trying to hand the dog off to everyone while it just licks his face non-stop. Fuck the match, Cornette is putting on an entirely separate show, I’m covering that. Cornette goes to the cameramen one by one and tries to get them to take the dog, but the cameramen all laugh in his face and refuse to take it. So Conette waves over a security guard to try to hand it off, but the dog gets loose from him and now Cornette has to chase down the dog, who’s running through the studio while the match continues.

-Steiner abandons the ring to coral the dog and hands it back to Cornette, who sounds winded from hauling it around. “This dog weighs 157 pounds! Hurry up and finish this match!” Cornette tries to bribe JR to hold the dog, but it falls apart when JR actually demands the money and Cornette admits he doesn’t have any cash on him. Steiner mows down Sweat with a lariat, which has Cornette visibly relieved, but Steiner pulls him up at two, and Cornette lets out an exhausted whine because that means he can’t get rid of the dog yet.

-Steiner pulls a little kid in the ring and encourages him to stomp on the jobber, and Cornette sounds frustrated. “He’s not gonna make me hold the kid, too, is he?” JYD ends it with the Thump as Cornette finally collapses from exhaustion and gets rid of the dog, and a wide shot reveals how complete Cornette’s ensemble really is. He’s wearing green loafers.

-Lex Luger cuts an intense promo, saying he’ll have “the third man” in his corner at Starrcade: the fans.

KEVIN SULLIVAN & “Dr. Death” STEVE WILLIAMS vs. RANDY MULKEY & RYAN WAGNER

-Mulkey gets knocked from the tree of woe to the concrete right away. Wagner takes his beating, but then decides Mulkey is better at it and tags him back in. Williams backdrops him straight on his ass and Mulkey bounces on the impact. Sullivan keeps dismantling in as the crowds chant “We want Steiner!” Williams works the arm as Mulkey just lies there limp. Mulkey has entered what I call the Krustyburglar phase of the TBS squash match, where you find yourself shouting “He’s already dead!” but he continues getting his ass kicked. Stampede by Doc finally ends it.

-A pretty great Starrcade commercial, with short promos from Ric Flair, Barry Windham, and Ric Flair over footage of the angles leading to their matches.

-The Road Warriors are here. Wrestling them is like riding a roller coaster, except with a roller coaster, you know you’re not REALLY gonna die.

THE FANTASTICS (US Tag Team Champions) vs. RICK ALLEN & JERRY PRICE
-Allen elbows down Tommy Rogers, but misses a corner charge and hurts his knee. Fantastics capitalize with a double dropkick. Price gets plopped on the top rope and Rogers brings him down with a back suplex. Allen tags back in and gets powerslammed, and atomic drops Fulton on top of him. Fulton works the arm for a bit before they wrap up with the Tower of Quebec.

-Ric Flair is wearing a designer sweater and a fur coat, which I believe qualifies as “casual wear” in Ric’s world. He’s the man, in case Lex Luger hasn’t heard.

STING vs. BILL HOLLIDAY

-Sting charges in there and presses Holliday, then suplexes him. We pause for a break, so Sting has to drag this one out for a bit. Back from the break, the Stinger splash and the scorpion deathlock finish.

-Sting shows off a GREAT drawing of him on a fan’s sign and encourages all the fans to paint their faces and order pay-per-view. Those are two separate thoughts. You don’t actually need to paint your face in order to get a pay-per-view broadcast.

RUSSIAN ASSASSINS (with Paul Jones) vs. TONY SUBER & MAX MILES

-#1 works Suber’s leg as JR pulls Jones over for “possibly his last appearance on TBS.” Jones promises the Assassins are loyal to him and they’ll do anything to keep him around. Paul Jones whips out “Everybody has a price!” as a catch phrase. Nice try, Paul. But Jones teases bribing JYD to turn on Ivan during the match at Starrcade. Max Miles ends up on the concrete as JR whips out a Yakov Smirnoff joke on commentary. Loaded mask headbutt finishes things.

-Paul E. and the Original Midnight Express are here. Paul makes his picks for Starrcade and warns the the other Midnights about what’s to come.

MIDNIGHT EXPRESS (with Jim Cornette) vs. MIKE JACKSON & GARY ROYAL

-Flying headscissors and a dropkick by Jackson. Bobby Eaton fights back with a hell of a move, chokeslamming Jackson onto his own bent knee. Jobber #2 tags in and gets an educated foot to the chest. Jackson heads back in and has a stand-off with Stan Lane. Eaton comes in and works the arm. Royal comes back in and throws punches, but he gets backdropped down and hits the post shoulder-first. Jackson heads back in and falls victim to the veg-o-matic to end it.

DUSTIN RHODES vs. TRENT KNIGHT

-Knight applies a side headlock but gets sent into the ropes and backdropped. Knight catches him with a dropkick. Dustin tries working the arm, but Knight drop toeholds him and they trade mat work. Knight comes off the top rope with a flying clothesline, but he tries it again and this time Dustin recovers in time to slam him off. Powerslam and a big elbow finish things. I kinda like that. Dustin’s been in the business for a month. He should be about on par with a lowly jobber in terms of ability, so they had an even, competitive match and Dustin just happened to win it.

NON-TITLE: BARRY WINDHAM (US Champion, with JJ Dillon) vs. “Hot Stuff” EDDIE GILBERT

-Windham hiptosses Gilbert and high-fives JJ to celebrate. He backs Gilbert into a corner and breaks cleanly because Gilbert needs the break. Gilbert wants to fight and Windham just backs off like he’s doing him a favor. We get words from Bam-Bam Bigelow, who promises to take the US Title with his “nuclear splash.”

-Windham shoulderblocks Gilbert, then goes to the floor and hangs out with JJ for a minute because the match is a total joke to him. Back in, Gilbert responds with an armdrag and a series of hiptosses. Back from commercial, Windham slaps Gilbert and is TRYING to treat him like a joke, but Gilbert aggressively responds with punches and Windham starts looking a BIT concerned. DDT by Gilbert and a big right hand sends Windham out to the floor. JJ has to steer Windham back to the ring because he’s been sufficiently put in his place and he’s so dazed he can’t find the apron on his own. Gilbert slingshots him back in and stays on him. A bodypress off the top gets two.

-Windham goes to the floor and is starting to look terrified. Windham gets lucky with a powerslam for two. Gilbert fights back with rights but gets booted down. Elbow to the jaw, and the commentators call it a night and get ready to move on to the next match BUT EDDIE KICKS OUT HOLY CRAP! Dropkick by Windham but Gilbert hangs on. Gilbert goes for a Thesz press but on impact, Windham applies a claw. Gilbert hangs on and fights back to his feet. JJ heads up to the apron and Barry shoves Gilbert into him, with JJ raising a knee, and Barry capitalizes with a cradle for the cheap win. Good story all the way through.

-Ric Flair comes out to congratulate him, and Gilbert complains about the ripoff loss. They tease a brawl in the ring, with Bam-Bam emerging right as we cut to credits and end the show.

6.6
The final score: review Average
The 411
Pretty good collection of matches for the go-home show. Windham vs. Gilbert was OK, I guess, but frankly, I could have used 20 more minutes of Jim Cornette's puppy adventure.
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