wrestling / TV Reports

Smarks Velocity Report 6.15.02

June 19, 2002 | Posted by G.P. Ryan

Two years ago year this week: Godfather over Essa Rios, Perry Saturn over Gangrel, Hardcore Holly over Stevie Richards, Eddy Guerrero & Chyna (who?) over Kaientai.

Last year: Rios over Sean Evans, Raven over Brad Hunter, K-Kwik & Jacqueline (wonder why they teamed them up) over Haku & Ivory, Jerry Lynn over TAKA Michinoku.

TV-14-DLV, Cole/Tazz.

Well, you see I didn’t realize Velocity had first-run matches for the first show, then I mislaid the next week or two’s tape, so there you go. And oh yeah, I get the feeling I won’t be seeing the announced Austin-Flair match at an upcoming house show. Call it a hunch.

Tag title: Billy & Chuck (w/Rico) v. Mark Henry & Randy Orton. What a big title match. Henry is big and strong, blah blah. Orton throws a few nice dropkicks, but a second hiptoss on Billy is reversed to a DDT and Orton takes unremarkable abuse for a couple minutes. Billy charges into a boot, double knockdown, hot tag Henry, who powerslams Chuck for 2. Orton with a Cactus clothesline on Gunn, but Rico distracts Henry, who falls prey to the Jungle Kick and Fameasser as Chuck pins him at 5:17. Leaves me with indifference.

Rikishi v. Albert. I (heart) the 2x play button on my remote, let me tell you. Albert gets all fast paced, oh wait. Albert smacks him around and avoids the buttdrop on a failed sunset flip. Rikishi gets in a shot, but ends up outside after a pair of charges. Albert puts the beats to him back in with splashes, but charges into a Samoan drop. Corner charge misses, pump kick for 1, 2, Johnny Ace. Albert goes up top for a change, and gets crotched for his trouble. That’ll learn him. Now the buttcharge hits, banzai finishes at 4:01. A good sign that the matches get some time, at any rate. I’ll take what I can get at this point for positive aspects. Less of the Rikishi, please.

From Raw: Vince beats Flair for ownership.

Fabulous Moolah and Mae Old wander out, as Cole plugs Moolah’s autobio.

Jamie Knoble Boy (w/Nidia) v. Funaki. Nidia is a horrible actress, yet this whole bit is strangely compelling because of it, I guess. Makeout session and Funaki schoolboys him for 2, but gets flattened with a lariat. Knoble keeps working the back. Nothing much to see, Funaki with an abdominal stretch but Knoble hiptosses out. Mini-comeback by Funaki, but Knoble goes dragon screw, sort of inverted figure four for the tapout at 4:20. Didn’t impress much, maybe some other time.

Clips: So HHH-UT wasn’t seen as drawing enough to headling Judgment Day, but is good enough for KOTR?

Kurt Angle v. Hardcore Holly. Angle still has the wig here, of course. Angle jumps him to start, but Holly puts the beats to him. Angle gets suplex happy, but Holly pops off a DDT. Holly with the standard babyface offense, pair of nice clotheslines, dropkick for 2. Powerbomb for 2. Holly tries his own overhead suplex, but Angle goes into the Germans, but Holly reverses after one for 2. Anglelock, so much for the hold when even Bob freaking Holly won’t tap. He rolls over and kicks away, gets a belly to belly for 2. Alabama Slam, but Angle rolls him up with the ropes, in a decidedly non-kosher pinning position at 6:17. Got pretty darn good.

Seems to be some more net time than on Metal, so that’s a good thing. I don’t ask for too much. Back next weekend, most likely.


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