World Championship Wrestling (5.6.1989) Review

-Originally aired May 6, 1989.

-Your hosts are Jim Ross and Michael P.S. Hayes. But Hayes clarifies that he’s actually still suspended from commentary because of Lex Luger, and tomorrow he’s going to win the US Title and prove that he never needed Terry or Buddy to succeed.

-I will never get used to hearing “ring announcer Rhubarb Jones.”

RICK STEINER (with Missy Hyatt) vs. MAX MCGIVER
-Rick Steiner’s geeky superfan is at ringside again this week, and shows Rick that she drew Alex on her own hand. Which I guess means Kevin Sullivan got a blowjob from Alex later. Belly-to-belly finishes in seconds.

-And Kevin Sullivan is here to say women don’t belong in wrestling and Missy Hyatt is messing up Steiner’s career AND Eddie Gilbert’s.

-Ric Flair is here with more fabulous babes and tells Steamboat that tomorrow, he can call himself the greatest wrestler in the world for the last time as he walks to the ring.

RICKY “The Dragon” STEAMBOAT (World Champion) vs. LEE SCOTT
-Steamboat wrings and snaps the arm. Bodypress gets an early two-count. Steamboat armdrags Scott into a wristlock. Scott shows some fire and drops an elbow for two. Steamboat fights back with a swank double-chop and a suplex. Steamboat finishes with a double chicken wing to tease that he’ll be doing it again tomorrow.

DESIGNATED HITTER MATCH: ROAD WARRIOR ANIMAL (with Hawk & Paul Ellering) vs. “Dr. Death” STEVE WILLIAMS (with Kevin Sullivan & Mike Rotunda)
-Each man takes turns sitting on a bar stool and his opponent and taking a single unprotected punch from his opponent. Dr. Death wins the coin flip and gets ready to throw the first punch, but instead he clotheslines Animal, and the brawl is on. And then 30 seconds later, the brawl is off. What a weird segment. Start to finish that was about two minutes.

-Steamboat vows not to fall for any of Ric Flair’s mind games tomorrow.

RIC FLAIR (with Hiro Matsuda and some babes) vs. DWAYNE BRUCE
-Steamboat stays on commentary and just kisses Flair’s ass before pivoting to “but I’m faithfully married, so ya know, better.” Flair chops Bruce and dumps him to the floor. JR says that last time these two wrestled, nobody posed to rock music and tried to cover their bald spot. SNAP! Figure four finishes for the Nature Boy.

-Jim Ross is here with Teddy Long, who’s dressed like a waiter. Teddy Long demands to be called Mr. Long and says he is protesting his firing from the NWA. He claims he was framed and theatens to make everyone in the NWA sorry.

TV TITLE: STING (Champion) vs. RIP MORGAN
-Even the fans’ signs are pointing out how bad Sheik’s physique is getting.

-Side headlock by Sting as JR starts touting the debut of the Dynamic Dudes, coming up next. Clothesline by Sting. Attempted stungun goes really wrong, do Sting goes back to the side headlock. Morgan slams him but misses a second rope legdrop. Stinger splash. Sheik distracts Sting before he can apply the scorpion deathlock, and Sheik’s visible struggle to get onto the apron is an unintentional highlight. And then Sting just pins Mornga anyway a few seconds later. Sheik and Morgan beat down the Stinger after the match.

-Gary Hart and Cowboy Mike Brady have some final words for Dick Murdoch before WrestleWar.

-The Dynamic Dudes like pizza and neon clothing. So like us.

DYNAMIC DUDES vs. THE RAIDER & GEORGE SOUTH
-George South hammers at Johnny Ace but gets bodypressed for two. The Dudes work the arm, dynamically, I might add. Double dropkick clears the ring. Shane gets caught in the corner and punched by South. Douglas fights back and the Dudes finish with a double slingshot suplex.

-A Ric Flair/Ricky Steamboat highlight montage that establishes just how bottom-of-the-barrel WWE Network is getting with stock music selections by the time they got to this episode. The track they’re using just has to be titled “Woman in a Leotard saying ‘…And One…'” Also, it’s 30 years past when it mattered, but the Clash of the Champions clip featuring a chyron that says “FREE OF CHARGE” probably shouldn’t have been included in a PPV hard sell.

6.1

The final score: review Average

The 411

Good hour, except for the Designated Hitter segment, which really did feel like they rushed through it and it didn't have the impact I think they were hoping for.