World Championship Wrestling Review (4.8.1989)

-Cold open: A slow-motion replay from Clash of the Champions, proving definitively that Ric Flair got a foot under the ropes.

-Huh. We’re still using the old opening.

-Originally aired April 8, 1989.

-Your host is Jim Ross, blue-screened into control room for a “special edition.” Jim Herd will be here later in the show to weigh in on the wacky finish.

-We take a look back at the NWA legends’ dinner seven nights ago. Again, the way that Terry Funk just blends into the group of old retired legends is a stroke of genius in hindsight.

-Back to the Clash of the Champions, to re-watch the closing minutes of each fall in the World Title match.

-JR concedes that Ric Flair got ripped off, and we go to a statement from Flair’s attorney, demanding a rematch within 30 days, or else lawsuits are coming against Jim Herd, Ted Turner, and Ricky Steamboat.

-JR plugs tonight’s house show in New Haven, Connecticut by saying hello to all of the great NWA fans who live in the Stamford area. Them’s fightin’ words.

-We head back to the Superdome for the closing minutes of a dark match at the Clash, Lex Luger defending the US Title against Lex Luger. Michael Hayes shows up and interferes. Luger rallies and wins with a torture rack, and good god, this must have been a terrible match if they only saw fit to give us two minutes on a two-hour show.

NON-TITLE:LEX LUGER (US Champion) vs. KENDALL WINDHAM
-We finally head to Center Stage Arena for our first actual match of the week. Kendall gets shoulderblocked and heads to the floor to pout. Kendall makes Luger chase him, but Luger no-sells the attack on the apron. Kendall tries a bodypress but Luger slingshots himself back in as Kendall leaps and Kendall crashes to the floor in a neat-looking spot. Back in, a press slam attempt goes miserably wrong and Lex finally turns it into a hot shot before they try it again and Luger gets the press slam he wanted.

-Kendall ducks a charge and Lex tumbles out to the floor. Back in, Kendall connects with a big boot and chops Luger. Luger fights back with rights. Michael Hayes leaves commentary and tries to cost Luger the match, but Luger instead just blows it off and finishes Kendall with a powerslam. Meh.

SHANE DOUGLAS vs. BOB ORTON, JR. (with Gary Hart)
-Orton is wearing a t-shirt with “Bodacious” airbrushed on both sides. Bob Orton. Bodacious. Shane catches Orton in headscissors. Great spot as Orton heads to his feet with Douglas still holding the headscissors, and basically just airplane spins him in that position before backdropping him off. High hiptoss by Orton. Douglas comes back with a suplex. Side headlock by Shane Douglas. Douglas tries shoulder rams; but Orton fights him off with a sweet counter, just wrapping his arms around Douglas in mid-ram and making it a shoulderbreaker. He throws Shane Douglas out to hard camera side for a smooth transition from Techwood Studios to Center Stage. All we need now are some wadded-up looking flags and it’ll feel like home again.

-Back in, Orton gets two from a backbreaker, then switches to a chinlock. Shane turns an attempted piledriver into a backdrop. Hiptoss and a dropkick by Douglas on the comeback trail. Missile dropkick by Douglas gets two. Douglas goes up again, but Orton meets him up there and superplexes him off and gets the pin, clean as a sheet. Douglas then grabs the mic and spends 45 minutes blaming everybody except himself for the loss.

THE DANGER ZONE
-Paul E. Dangerously whips out a Roddy Piper impression before abruptly switching to his natural voice and assuring us that the Danger Zone segment is not an imitation of anything. He’s given Jack Victory the week off because he doesn’t need a bodyguard this week. His guest is Sting, who sneaks up on Paul and terrifies him with some “Wooooos” from behind. Paul threatens him with a phone shot, and Sting just gives him a Moe-style bop on the nose and takes off. Both of them seemed to be having fun out there.

-We head to New Orleans and the US Tag Team Title match. The post-match shenanigans, according to JR, “have necessitated a taped fist environment.” I’m turning that into a PowerPoint slide after I’m done watching this show.

RICK STEINER (with Missy Hatt) vs. PAUL BROWN
-Backdrop by Steiner. He battering-rams the jobber into the turnbuckle. He sends the jobber upside-down into another corner, and a belly-to-belly gets the win.

-We go to one of the matches missing from the WWE Network’s version of the Clash, Road Warriors defending the World Tag Team Titles against Mike Rotunda & Steve Williams. Road Warriors shove Teddy Long out of the way before they hit the Doomsday Device on Mike Rotunda. But Teddy Long just stays in the corner and refuses to count the pin. And then Steve Williams slips in and rolls up Hawk, and Teddy Long counts the fastest three in wrestling history and books it out of there to give the belts to the Varsity Club.

ROAD WARRIORS (with Paul Ellering) vs. KEITH STEINBORN & GREG BROWN
-Jobbers get murdered as Michael Hayes defends Teddy Long, saying anybody can have an off-night at their job. Doomsday device finishes.

CAPTAIN MIKE ROTUNDA & “Dr. Death” STEVE WILLIAMS (World Tag Team Champions, with Kevin Sullivan) vs. DON SANDERS & GREG BROWN
-Varsity Club mocks the Road Warriors by charging the ring and attacking in the same style and oh my god, one of the jobbers in this match is the jobber that just ate the Doomsday device. Holy shit, what are the odds that Randy Hogan, Tony Suber, El Negro, and both Mulkey Brothers would all have flat tires on the same day and they’d have to resort to that? Oklahoma stampede by the good doctor, and the double underhook by Rotunda finishes.

TV TITLE: STING (Champion) vs. RIP MORGAN
-And here’s where the journey to find something for Rip Morgan to do is leading us this week. Sting slams him and boots him. Side headlock is clamped on. Morgan slams him but misses a legdrop and this crowd just gives negative damns about Rip Morgan. Bodypress by Sting. Stinger splash and the scorpion deathlock finish this one.

-Jim Ross welcomes Jim Herd. Herd declares that the rematch will happen on May 7, with a one hour time limit, and three judges in the event of a time limit draw.

RANDY ROSE vs. JACK VICTORY (with Paul E. Dangerously)
-Funny transition as Jim Ross in the studio calmly tells us that we’re going back to the arena for the next match and we switch straight to JR in full-blown “Good god almighty!” mode, as Rose comes off the top rope and attacks Victory on the floor to start the match, then whips him with a belt. Rose chases Paul E. around the ring until he runs into a clothesline from Victory. They fight it out in the ring until Rose misses a corner charge and tumbles back out to the floor.

-Back in, Randy keeps fighting for his life and comes off the top rope with a clothesline that looks to finish, but Paul E. swoops in with a cell phone to the head that knocks Randy out cold, and Victory rolls over to get the pin. Fun brawl!

-Off to another “lost match” from the Clash, as Bob Orton pins Dick Murdoch with exactly the same finish that Ultimate Warrior and Rick Rude did that same day.

GREAT MUTA (with Gary Hart) vs. TWO JOB GUYS
-Muta (with JR emphasizing that he’s received clarification on the pronunciation) puts one jobber out with the Japanese leg sleeper. Moonsault finishes the match.

-We get pre-taped words from Ricky Steamboat and Ric Flair about their upcoming rematch, with JR hastily shoehorning in an explanation that although Jim Herd only officially made the announcement today, the combatants were notified and thankfully, the news was not leaked to CNN, which is why we’re hearing about it for the first time today. Steamboat admits that giving Flair a rematch after seeing the instant replay is the right thing to do, while Flair assures us that, yes, in fact, he is the man.

5.3

The final score: review Not So Good

The 411

Pacing of the show was all over the place because of the way the show basically got thrown into a blender in post production, to the point that I actually needed to take a break while I was watching. Randy Rose vs. Jack Victory was a pleasant surprise but the rest of the matches were pretty forgettable.