wrestling / TV Reports
411’s WWE Raw Report 6.27.05
Hello everyone, it is I Larry Csonka subbing, again for the partying Alex Obal. Tonight’s Raw will provide the usual Monday night fix of wrestling, but let’s see what happened last week that led to tonight!
Last week on Raw:
Match #1 Carlito defeated Shelton Benjamin to become the NEW WWE Intercontinental Champion
Match #2 Viscera defeated Simon Dean
Match #3 John Cena defeated Hassan
Match #4 Batista defeated Kurt Angle by DQ
Match #5 HHH and Kurt Angle defeated HBK and Batista
Remember to keep refreshing the page to see all the action as it happens!
WWE Raw Starts…NOW!
Dance to the music…
JR, Coach and the King welcome us to Monday Night RAW!
Kurt Angle will start off our show this evening as he heads to the ring. Angle is all business, no spin in the ring tonight! At WM 21 he made HBK tap, last night at Vengeance, HBK got LUCKY! They are 1-1 and he bets that we all want to see round 3 tonight! It’s not going to happen. He beat HBK at the biggest show of all and that counts for 2! HAHA! They are through. He is here for another man, BATISTA! Last week he didn’t get a chance to beat Batista, because HHH stuck his BIG nose into his business. Angle says he has beaten everyone in this business, and he is the man and no one alive can say anything different.
IT’S FLAIR! WOOOOOOOOO! Stylin and profilin! Angle wants to know what the hell he is doing out here? Is HHH going to babble for 20-minutes while Flair smiles? Flair says he wants to shake his hand. He came out here to re-enforce everything he said. If Angle stays healthy he can be the greatest of all time! Flair wants his son to be like Angle, not him. To be as good as Angle. He’s a MARK for Angle! But, saying he’s the man…Flair doesn’t think so, he goes with HHH. Angle says he knows what he’s up to, and HHH doesn’t get any more shots at Batista because he lost 3 times. Flair doesn’t talk for HHH, and HHH isn’t here because HHH has 30-stitches and a cracked rib and he is physically and emotionally unable to be here. Angle says Flair is looking at the best, and tells Flair to go to the back and drink some Ensure and take a nap before he gets hurt! BURN! Flair asks if he ever crashed in an airplane? He says his match last night was great, but if Angle messed with him, he’ll poke him in the eye or bite his finger off. And if that doesn’t work, he’ll grab him by the TESTICLES! **Jacket off** He’ll hurt Angle if he messes with him. Flair is the dirtiest player in the game. Angle says to be careful or he will ask for a match against Flair, and Flair doesn’t want that. Flair VINCE is home drooling over that match. Angle says first time ever! FLAIR vs. ANGLE! WOOO! WOOO! BATTLE OF THE WOOO’S!
They pimp the final two draft picks later tonight, as well as the Diva search beginning.
We go to commercials.
Back from commercials as JR, King and Coach discuss how great Vengeance was.
They run down the triple threat match with exclusive footage of Christian, Tomko and Jericho arguing. Tonight we will get a 6-man tag. Those 3 vs. Cena and 2 partners of his choice. If he can’t find partners, it will be 3 on 1.
The next match will be a tag with one of the new lottery picks!
Edge w. Lita and Snitsky vs. Kane and ???
Kane attacks right away and clears the ring. He nails Edge with a chair and chases him through the crowd. Bishoff is out to announce the next lottery pick, and since Kane and Edge left, it is one on one.
No Contest
Snitsky vs. THE BIG SHOW!
Snitsky stares him down and they exchange rights. Off the ropes and a boot by Snitsky followed by rights. Boots by Show now and a corner whip and clothesline by Show. Chops to Snitsky now and then Show chokes him with his boot. Head butt to Snitsky. Show in control now and a short arm clothesline to Snitsky. Rights by Show and a corner whip, but Snitsky with a boot. GOOZLE! CHOKESLAM! 1…2…3!
Winner: The Big Show @ 2:30
Commercial time.
We are back with Maria who is with John Cena. She forgot her question. Cena takes the mic and tells her to go and think about her question and come back. His facials were funny. He says Eric Bishoff is afraid of him and he beat Jericho and Christian. Tonight he is in a 6-man tag and he has to find 2 partners, on a program where he has no friends. Someone out there had him back, HBK! HBK says it’s been rough going and hasn’t welcomed him yet, to the snake pit that is Raw. Cena thanks him, and says they are one short, and asks if he “made the call” and the deal has been set and the man is on the way to the arena. WHO IS IT? Tonight will be full of surprises. Maria is back and asks, “Did you find a partner?” It’s fake, but so bad.
JR, Coach and King show Diva finalists backstage.
Edge and Lita are leaving the building as Lita gets her bag. Kane is there! He says he could kill her, she had her fun, now he has his! He will squeeze every last breath from her. This is just the beginning, and have a lot of fun and make her life a living hell!
Commercial time.
We are back as Steve Cook just Im’ed me and says the 3rd partner should be Marty Jannetty! Cool choice Steve!
They pimp the Angle vs. HBK match later.
Chris Masters is in the ring. He says he has NO RESPECT for anyone here on Raw, he ups the challenge to $14,000! He wants someone, anyone to break the Masterlock. So who will it be? Tajiri is out to accept the challenge! WE WANT MIST! Masters says this is American money, worth more than the Japanese yen. He is the MASTERPEICE! Tajiri says he understands, and Masters is a MASTER JACKASS!
KICK to Masters! TARANTULA TO MASTERS! Buzzsaw kick misses, but gets the handspring elbow. Masters with the Masterlock. Tajiri fights, but he is out!
Masters with the mic and says it doesn’t matter who you are, nobody can break the Masterlock! From this day forward he demands respect! He asks Tajiri if he will respect him? GREEN MIST! BWAHAHAHA! Tajiri escapes the ring as Masters rolls around on the floor.
More pimping of the Diva Search II.
Commercial time.
We are back as Carlito comes to the ring.
Carlito’s Cabana
He welcomes to the debut of Carlito’s Cabana on Raw. Says he made a huge impact already, and will replace the Highlight Reel as the #1 show on Raw, and there will be NO FOZZY music here. He also replaced Shelton, who he beat again last night, as IC champion. Not all news is great, Eric says earlier tonight that his guest is the final draft pick for Raw. Raw’s streak of great draft picks has come to an end, this pick is a lemon. After drafting Carlito, you can only go down. The next pick is…R…V…D! He’s wearing his ECW shirt and knee brace. Carlito says WOW…Rob Van Dam. ECW and RVD chants. Carlito says he guesses Eric was right about him being a lemon. Oh yes, the last time he say RVD it was at ECW ONS. Carlito says RVD was whining and complaining at the show and all he ever got to say was “cool.” He also says “dude” a lot. RVD says he is real funny, a lemon you call me? When he thinks of Carlito he thinks of fruit! Last time he saw Carlito he got his ass kicked by the ECW superstars! He did speak at ONS, and now people want to know what he has to say. No one has seen anyone like RVD and his high-risk maneuvers. That’s what makes RVD one of a kind. Sure he took a minute off, and Carlito doesn’t need to worry about RVD, he has to worry about Raw being taken to the extreme! And the return of MR. MONDAY NIGHT! Carlito says that was cute, but he is still injured and Carlito likes that. Carlito attacks RVD’s knee and grabs the table and takes off RVD’s knee brace! He rams his knee off of the steel table he has in there. Then he spits apple on him!
Up next is Angle vs. Flair!
Commercial time.
We are back as Kurt Angle and Ric Flair come to the ring.
Ric Flair vs. Kurt Angle
Flair taunts Angle a bit, WOOOO! Lock up and a headlock take down by Angle. Flair escapes and then a headlock take down by Flair and Angle escapes. Off the ropes and Flair holds on and struts. Angle charges Flair and he backdrops him to the floor. Flair follows and chops to Angle. Back in the ring we go and Angle did not like the chops. Lock up and Flair with a sweet take down into a hammer lock. Angle escapes and gets a half nelson and slaps Flair. Flair BITES HIS FINGERS! 2 points for the escape. Flair pulls at Angle’s nose! Beer tap submission there, very technical. Single leg take down by Angle and Flair gouges Angle’s eyes. Chops to Angle, and Angle with the European uppercuts and Flair set to the floor. Flair rams Angle off of the steel steps and then rolls him back in. Angle rolls out the other side and Flair chases and chops away at him. Rights by Flair but Angle fires back and gets a belly to belly to Flair on the floor! We go to commercial @ 4:41.
Back @ 7:40 with Angle working an arm bar on Flair. Angle rammed Flair to the steps and Flair took a HARD bump on the replay. Chops by Angle now and then rights. Angle clotheslines Flair to the floor and he tries to regroup but Angle follows. Chops by Flair and back in we go. Rights by Angle now, and off the ropes goes Flair and a HIGH backdrop gets 2. STF by Angle now! Flair tries to crawl out, and BITES HIS HAND AGAIN! 2 points for the escape. Flair over and chops away at Angle, but a right takes Flair down. Flair to the floor and Angle chases. Eye poke by Flair, but Angle gets a backdrop to Flair on the floor. DAMN! Back in and Angle covers for 2. Flair with rights, and then chops to Angle. Off the ropes and an elbow by Flair. Flair fakes an elbow, Angle rolls and Flair waits and then drops the elbow! Knee drop by Flair, and here he goes up top! DON’T DO IT RIC! Angle leaps up and nails Flair with rights. They went for a superplex, but didn’t happen and Flair falls to the floor. Back in and an ANGLE SLAM for 2! Ankle lock on Flair! Flair tries to escape and TESTICLE GRAB! 3 points for that escape. AGAIN! Dirtiest player in the game baby! Chop block to Angle! FIGURE FOUR ON ANGLE! Angle tries to escape, he rolls it but Flair locks in still and finally Angle gets the ropes! Chops by Flair again and then rights to Angle. Angle fights back and GERMAN TO FLAIR! Flair grabs the ref to stop #2, GRECO ROMAN NUT SHOT! Stalling suplex by Flair 1…2…NO! Chops to Angle again in the corner. Flair knee breaker to Angle but he gets the ANKLE LOCK AGAIN! Flair tries to get the ropes…but Angle pulls him back and drops to the grapevine! Flair taps!
Winner: Kurt Angle @ 17:11
Angle leaves the ring as the ref tends to Flair.
JR, King and Coach pimp the 6-man for later tonight.
Diva Search II stuff is next.
Commercial time.
We are back with the Coach to announce the Diva Search II whore…er, ladies. Long live the Bimbo Battalion ™.
He announces Christy Hemme and she comes out like she is on crack. They bring them out as King goes crazy.
Hemme and Coach say that being a Diva is a huge honor. Coach brings up Hemme losing, and then she threatens Vince telling them to hit Coach in the nuts. They get 30-seconds to…uh oh, Big Vis is out. He’s wearing his PJ’s. Coach says that this is not Viscera’s time. Vis says everyone is tired of Coach, I’m not. Vis wants to see hot, sexy action. Vis says they need to know how to loosen up and get sexy. Especially when it comes to big Vis. Hemme agrees. Hemme says they should strip to bra and panties. Coach says he thought of it and says they get 30-seconds to explain and strip down.
Ashley is a little punky and a tight little body.
Leyla says she didn’t know underwear was a requirement. She has none on.
Summer says “y’all.” Nice body.
Kristal isn’t bad.
Elisabeth goes with simple white undies.
Simona is hot blooded Italian. Not bad.
Cameron is actually wearing clothes. She’s apparently all natural, I’d have to verify that.
Alexis is last. She isn’t here to play nice. She’s a woman that will get raw and pounds a beer and steals Flair’s catchphrase. GIMMICK INFRINGEMENT x 2!
They dance with Vis, Coach is jealous.
THE SARGE IS OUT! Next week the contest officially begins. He wants all of them to report for duty, and he means chin up, and CHEST out! Is that clear? Next week on July 4th, they will run an obstacle course. The Slaughter Bikini Boot Camp. Next week, they’re all his! AND THAT’S! AN ORDER!
Hemme tells them to dance more.
Commercial time.
We are back with Todd Grisham who had Batista with him. Batista has holes in his back and head and he is in pain, he feels like he was in a war and HHH took something from him, that Cell took something from him that he will never get back. Todd asks if it was worth it and Batista says you bet your ass it was! He is still the champ and it doesn’t get any bigger than this!
Jericho, Christian and Tomko discuss who the partner could be. They bring up Jannetty and say he is in jail. Then Nash, but they say he’d rip a hamstring getting into the ring. They tease Rock, without saying his name and go to commercial.
Back from commercial
Cena need to speak. THE CHAMP IS HERE! He brought friends! Two more members of the chain gang! He brings out HBK. HBK with the mic and the 3rd man is his favorite tag team partner, the one, the only…Hulk Hogan.
BAH GAWD DREAM TEAM!
Christian, Chris Jericho and Tomko vs. John Cena, HBK and Hulk Hogan
JIP with Jericho beating down Cena. Corner whip and Cena gets the boot up. Clothesline to Jericho. Tag to HBK and chops to Jericho. Jericho with chops and off the ropes and a reversal and forearm by HBK! He nails Christian but Jericho with the running Enziguri to HBK. Jericho chokes out HBK and tags in Tomko. Power slam to HBK gets 2. Tag to Christian now and he boots away at HBK. Neck breaker to HBK gets 2. They work HBK over in the corner and the ref holds Cena and Hogan back. Jericho in now and Hogan cheers him on brother. HBK elbows out and off the ropes and Jericho with a knee to HBK. Hogan didn’t like that brother. Christian in now and then tags in Tomko. Rights by Tomko and then chokes HBK. Tag to Jericho and he slaps HBK. HBK with rights , but Jericho gets the running bulldog. Lionsault misses! HBK crawls…TAG TO HOGAN BROTHER! Rights to all 3 by Hogan brother. Clothesline to Tomko. Cena takes Jericho to the floor. Christian and Tomko double team Hogan! YOU BROTHER! Double noggin knocker brother! YOU! Rights to Tomko, big boot brother, leg drop brother 1…2…3 brother!
Winner: John Cena, HBK and Hulk Hogan @ 6:35
They celebrate as HBK puts on Hogan’s bandanna. Hogan tries to leave, but Cena brings him back in to pose. Cena poses with him. HBK poses with Hogan’s bandanna on as Cena takes the belt and leaves and bows to them.
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