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Csonka’s WWE Raw Review 10.09.17
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Csonka’s WWE Raw Review 10.09.17
OFFICIAL RESULTS
– Jason Jordan defeated Karl Anderson @ 8:25 via pin [**¼]
– Elias defeated Apollo Crews @ 2:45 via pin [NR]
– Braun Strowman defeated Matt Hardy @ 6:30 via pin [**]
– Jack Gallagher & Brian Kendrick defeated Cedric Alexander and Mustafa Ali @ 3:38 via pin [*¾]
– Elimination Match: Emma defeated Bayley, Dana Brooke, Sasha Banks and Alicia Fox @ 9:10 via pin for the right to get killed by Asuka at TLC [*¾]
– Lumberjack Cruiserweight Title Match: Kalisto defeated Champion Enzo Amore @ 8:15 via pin [**½]
– Follow all of my reviews at this link.
– We get highlights from last week’s show.
MIZ TV: It’s the Mizzies part two. No Bo Dallas here, just Curtis Axel. Axel wins an award and dedicates it to Dallas, who is apparently away recovering. Miz then gives the best supporting actors award to Sheamus and Cesaro; they are Miz’s guests. Sheamus and Cesaro thank the Miz and everyone for their awards. They proved that they can go anywhere with their actions last week. Sheamus thanks Roman Reigns for taking his ass beating last week. Cesaro then thanks Rollins and Ambrose, for busting his teeth and giving The Bar the motivation to put them in their place. Miz says the Shield doesn’t want any part of this because their time has passed. Hard work pays off and the good guys sometimes win. Miz gives himself an award, calling himself the true big dog of WWE. They all celebrate their awards as Miz dedicates his award to his unborn child and any child that needs a mentor. Reigns now makes his way out to the ring. Reigns gives them one chance to get out of his ring. Miz says Reigns won’t do shit because it’s 4 on 1. Miz tells Reigns to go and get Dean and Seth, and downplays the Shield reunion. Reigns says who said anything about rumors as Ambrose appears. Rollins now appears. They head to the ring and surround it old school style. And we brawl! Axel is taken out immediately as the Shield cleans house and stand tall. They then kick the shit out of Miz, and deliver the Shield bomb. We get the Shield fist bump and they are back. This was a great opening segment, Miz was a great asshole and the fans responded big time to the Shield reunion.
Jason Jordan vs. Karl Anderson: This is fallout from last week, where the Good Brothers beat Jordan and Hardy. Jordan grounds things and looks for a crossface right away. Anderson makes the ropes, and lays in rights. Jordan escapes, hitting a shoulder block and after a Gallows distraction, Anderson dropkicks the knee of Jordan. Post break, with Anderson controlling, working the arm. Jordan hits a boot, but runs into a spinebuster for 2. Anderson keeps things grounded, Jordan fires up with rights and Saito suplex. He follows with forearms, and then an overhead toss. Anderson thumbs Jordan in the eyes, but Jordan avoids a charge and hits the pop up neck breaker for the win. Jason Jordan defeated Karl Anderson @ 8:25 via pin [**¼] This was solid, with Jordan picking up a much needed win. Booker T’s manic commentary was very annoying and distracting though.
– Angle checks on the Miz as he gets iced down. Angle makes The Shield vs. Miz, Cesaro, & Sheamus in a TLC match as the main event of the TLC PPV.
– Elias arrives to debut a new tune. He buries Apollo Crews and sings his song. As he starts, Titus arrives playing a banjo. Tutus plays banjo poorly and sings even worse.
Elias vs. Apollo Crews: JIP with Elias working the heat, targeting the arm of Crews. Elias hits old school, but Crews fires up and makes his comeback. The standing moonsault gets 2. They brawl to the floor, and Crews hits an apron moonsault. Back in and Elias pulls Crews to he ropes throat first, hits drift away and wins. Elias defeated Apollo Crews @ 2:45 via pin [NR] can we please move away from this match, I’ve had enough.
– Enzo arrives, does his usual shtick, and says he and Angle were getting along well because he had a no contact agreement. But Kalisto then arrives, and somehow he gets a title match at TLC. He says Angle should come to the ring right now. Angle arrives, and Enzo says he is the cash cow. He brings out his agreement from last week, and questions how Kalisto gets a title shot. Kalisto wasn’t a cruiserweight when he signed the clause, so he’s free and clear. Enzo claims he was hustled and demands respect. Enzo says he’s the biggest star in the locker room and says Angle should be making him happy. Angle now says the TLC match is cancelled, and will take place tonight. Enzo agrees, but says he will do so only if it’s the main event. Angle agrees. But before he leaves, Angle makes the match a lumberjack match, and puts the clause on hold. Enzo was his usual braggadocios and annoying self, while Angle had no time for his bullshit. I can’t tell if putting the cruiserweight in the main event is an attempt to push them or to tank the third hour during football season so the “stars” don’t have to take the blame.
Braun Strowman vs. Matt Hardy: Strowman’s all like, you wanna be broken? You got it. Matt tries to fight, but Strowman just overpowers him and kicks his ass. Post break, Strowman does his run into the post like an idiot spot. Matt hits a tornado DDT and twist of fate, covering for 2. Strowman then hits the chokeslam and running powerslam: Matt Hardy= Deleted. Braun Strowman defeated Matt Hardy @ 6:30 via pin [**] Welcome to Fucked, population Matt Hardy. Match was solid, Strowman killing dudes is fun.
– Post match Strowman carries Matt to the back, likely to eat him. But the Shield makes the save, and they all have issues with Strowman. Strowman says fuck it and attacks. The numbers get to him and, and they Shield bomb that big bastard through the announce table. The Shield took time to change into their new shirts, get that merch money boys. I have no issue with Strowman getting taken out that way, he destroyed Dean and Seth in back to back week, and has a ton of history with Reigns.
– Charly interviews the Shield. They are back and stringer than ever, and will take on the world if they have to and they are the workhorses that run the business now.
– Mickie James is here to talk. Since she came back to Raw, she was worried she didn’t fit in. It’s all Bliss’ fault; she’s been making jokes trying to take cheap shots at her. And last week, Bliss runs away and hides behind Jax and gets involved in her match. James runs done Bliss for being a little girl and age is only a number, and all she cares about is the number 7, because at TLC she will be the 7 time women’s champion. Bliss arrives, and apologizes and put together a special video for her. It’s in black and white like a world war II news film in the theaters, with the narrator, burying James for being old. Bliss calls her grandma and tells her to go and get some rest. At TLC she will run circles around her. James tells her to bring her biscuit butt to the ring. Bliss heads to the ring and then backs off. James attacks and tosses her in the ring and James lays in ground and pound. Bliss manages to escape as James stands tall. Mickie has shown great fire in her promos, and that newsreel gag was great. They are doing a good job building to the match.
– Asuka debuts at TLC. Banks and Bayley are with Kurt and Bayley wants the match. Banks says she deserves the match. Alicia Fox arrives and complains about only having one shirt. She wants the match, Dana Brooke arrives and she wants the chance. And now Emma is here and she wants the match. Kurt books Bayley vs. Dana Brooke vs. Sasha Banks vs. Alicia Fox vs. Emma with the winner getting Asuka at TLC. Odd that there was no Nia involvement.
Cedric Alexander and Mustafa Ali vs. Jack Gallagher & Brian Kendrick: Gallagher attacks Ali, allowing Kendrick to work over Alexander. Kendrick and Gallagher work quick tags, working the heat on Alexander. Alexander eventually makes the tag, Ali runs wild and hits the rolling neck breaker for 2. Kendrick cuts off Ali and hits a sloppy ass sliced bread for the win. Jack Gallagher & Brian Kendrick defeated Cedric Alexander and Mustafa Ali @ 3:38 via pin [*¾] Not very good, as it was rushed and disjointed
– Since Ambrose said the Shield could beat any 3, 4, 5 or 6 men; Miz talks Angle into allowing him a 4th man on his TLC team, and that man is BRAUN.
– Finn Balor arrives. He says that this is Balor club, and brings up Wyatt and sister Abigail. He then says that Wyatt is desperate for attention. Balor isn’t afraid of Wyatt, and the demon isn’t afraid. We see Wyatt’s empty rocking chair, and he then appears and says to be afraid of her. He then spoke about Abigail choosing him and the season of the witch is here, and she’s here. Wyatt “transforms” into Abigail, talking with a black scorpion like voice and wearing a shroud over his/her face. He/she says the demon can’t win… Bray is on some gooooooooooooood shit. Unfortunately this angle and its promos keep getting worse. I just do not find this entertaining and find it to be a huge waste of Balor. This is like that one friend you have that goes trick or treating, changes costumes and thinks no one notices.
Elimination Match: Bayley vs. Dana Brooke vs. Sasha Banks vs. Alicia Fox vs. Emma: Emma backs off and allows the others to fight it out. Fox then goes after her, but Dana makes the save. I guess she and Emma are friends again. Nope, Dana attacks Emma and Bayley is back. Dana hits a sloppy slam and cartwheel splash that mostly misses. Bayley to belly on Dana and she’s gone @ 2:25. Banks rolls up Bayley for 2. Bayley lights her up with forearms, but Fox hits the axe kick and pins Bayley @ 3:15. Post break, Emma and Fox work over Banks. Fox and Emma of course argue, and start trying to pin each other. Banks hits a dropkick on both, and runs wild, getting the Banks statement on Fox and tapping her out @ 8:30. Emma then rolls up Banks and wins @ 9:10. Emma defeated Bayley, Dana Brooke, Sasha Banks and Alicia Fox @ 9:10 via pin for the right to get killed by Asuka at TLC [*¾] This was sloppy, disjointed and not good at all.
– Balor is interviewed about Sister Abigail, trying to sell this shit and telling us he now knows what he has to do.
– Next week…
NEXT WEEK: The #BigDog @WWERomanReigns and The #MonsterAmongMen @BraunStrowman will be locked inside a #SteelCage on #RAW! pic.twitter.com/xolK31Zf1q
— WWE (@WWE) October 10, 2017
– Charly interviews Kalisto, who talks about Eddie& Rey being his inspirations. And that is why he has to stop Enzo.
– The cruiserweights arrive for lumberjack duty.
– Enzo cuts a pre-match promo, burying the rest of the cruiserweights.
Lumberjack Cruiserweight Title Match: Champion Enzo Amore vs. Kalisto: JIP as Enzo is in control and yelling at the lumberjacks. Enzo then punts Kalisto in the gut. Kalisto battles back, hits a springboard high cross for 2. Enzo tossed to the floor, makes it back in and slams Kalisto to the buckles on a cradle. Kalisto sent to the floor and Daivari & Gallagher attack him before rolling him back in. Enzo covers for 2. He then grounds the action, but Kalisto battles back, blocking the kick and hitting the spiked RANA for 2. Enzo cuts him of with a stomp out of the corner, and Enzo kicks Ali and the lumberjacks brawl. Enzo gets cut off, Kalisto takes him up top and superplexes him onto the cruiserweights on the floor. Enzo crawls away and back into the ring. Kalisto back in as well. Enzo counters salida del sol and hits soul food but Ali breaks up the pin. Enzo and Ali argue and Enzo lays him out and crotches Kalisto. They battle up top and Kalisto hits a super salida del sol for the win. Kalisto defeated Champion Enzo Amore @ 8:15 via pin [**½] Well that was unexpected. One would imagine that they aren’t done with Enzo just yet (we likely get the rematch at TLC), but we’ll see how they follow up tomorrow night but for now the division is wide open again. This wasn’t bad, it was more angle than a match, and had its entertaining portions.
– The cruiserweights celebrate with Kalisto as Corey Graves gloriously celebrates the fall of Enzo.
– End scene.
– Thanks for reading.
~GLORIOUS~
