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The winter of our discontent is finally ending, the doldrums fall behind us and the malaise of apathy can at long last drop from our shoulders. Tonight marks the return of our Tribal Chief, the head of the table, Undisputed WWE Universal champion Roman Reigns is finally back on our screens. My apologies for the somewhat purple prose but Smackdown without Roman has been a real struggle at times, mostly because we all know that the main story on Smackdown wont actually advance until he’s present so when he’s gone the narrative momentum stalls quite a bit. In Roman’s absence lesser Uso, Jimmy, has been trying to reclaim a spot in the Bloodline and take over giving the orders, and the result has been a lot of failure. Roman’s handling of the Jimmy situation is going to be key for what happens next, especially with both Crown Jewel and Survivor Series starting to loom up on the horizon. The Bloodline and Judgement Day have been teasing some kind of alliance so I imagine we’ll get some movement on that front. Also the new tag team champions Cody Rhodes and Jey Uso will be on hand, and rumor has it we’ll get confirmation of who was traded to Smackdown for Jey when Jey moved to RAW as well as an open challenge for the tag team belts that Cody and Jey have issued. John Cena will still be around while the SAG is still on strike, LA Knight pinned Jimmy Uso and is riding a heck of a wave right now, Charlotte will almost certainly try to lay claim to another title shot at Iyo Sky, and Carlito returned to align with the LWO at the expense of the Hurt Profits, so let’s see if Bobby Lashley and the Street Profits can recapture a bit of momentum. Triple H is scheduled to make an appearance, Pretty Deadly return after Elton Prince’s injury and they’ll take on the Brawling Brutes, and who knows what else might happen. Anyway that’s the preamble, let’s get to the action.
Up first, here comes John Cena. Cena gets a mic and plays with the crowd to welcome them to the Smackdown “season premier” but right after that our long missed final boss music hits and here comes Roman Reigns. Roman is flanked by Paul Heyman and Solo Sikoa, no sign of Jannetty Uso. Per usual Roman takes his time getting to the ring where he and Cena have something of a stand off. Roman gets a mic from Heyman, and Heyman looks over the freaking moon to be back beside Roman. Roman says if Cena is going to open his show he better do it the right way, then Roman allows Tulsa to acknowledge him. Pretty loud “Cena” chant after that, and Roman tells everyone they’re chanting for a coward. Cena only showed up because Roman was on vacation, and has the audacity to get people calling Cena the greatest of all time. Let’s be honest Cena, we all know Roman is the GOAT. But we’ve done this before and Roman handled it, but they can do it again and tells Cena to leave or they’ll make him leave. Cena considers, he can feel the energy and knows it’s all because of what’s about to happen. Smackdown is unpredictable to begin with, but putting Cena and Roman in the ring together, who knows what’s next. Cena isn’t here to challenge Roman, he’s here to acknowledge him and puts over the 1,138 days that Roman has held the title and Cena calls that the greatest accomplishment in wrestling. Cena isn’t challenging Roman tonight because he hasn’t earned it, but he knows someone who has, and here comes LA Knight to his usual monster pop. Well that’s definitely getting tossed into the deep end for Knight. Roman seems mildly aware of the crowd reaction. Cena hands Knight his mic and Roman’s growing confusion is palpable as Knight wants to talk to us. He asks if Roman is pissing his pants yet, then says Roman isn’t a defending champion, he’s a man standing in Knight’s way. Oh, how rude of him, Knight then has to introduce himself since Roman has been sitting on the couch while Knight has proved that this is his game. Roman seems bemused, and says he’s proud of Knight that after two months people say his name, but Roman has done things that Knight can never even dream of. Who the hell does he think he is standing in Roman’s ring right now. Knight says speaking like that is a good way to earn a past tense reference, and calls himself the fastest rising star in Smackdown history, then Jimmy Uso jumps him from behind. Knight makes his own save and tosses Jimmy. Roman doesn’t move as he and Knight go face to face, Roman thinks about doing something but Heyman reminds him they don’t do stuff for free and Roman heads out with Solo in tow, then tells Solo to handle Knight and forget about Cena. Solo hops on the apron and Knight invites him into the ring, Solo just tells him they’ll fight tonight. Knight picks up his mic and for those of us who don’t speak moron Solo offered a fight later, well if Solo wants a fight then Knight will turn him upside down and use him like a mop, and that’s not an insult it’s just a fact of life. . . yeah! Pretty good segment there, Knight held his own in there with Roman and Cena and Knight might make for a suitable opponent for Roman at Crown Jewel.
Commentary runs down the card for us as we head to break.
Post break we get a super dramatic entrance for Pretty Deadly before their Abba knockoff hits. Also please stop doing that slow motion effect, it’s just off putting.
Match #1 – Tag Team Match: Pretty Deadly (Elton Prince and Kit Wilson) vs. Brawling Brutes (Butch and Ridge Holland)
Butch and Prince start us off, Butch quickly goes to the fingers of Prince then stomps on his arm. Ridge tags in, and Prince dives away to tag in Wilson. Wilson gets run over by Ridge then Butch tags back in to hit a double stomp then a low dropkick. Butch kicks Prince then slams down Wilson and kicks him in the head. Butch dives onto Wilson, and Ridge grabs Prince for some Bodhran Beating as we head to break.
Wilson is landing punches to Butch as we come back from break. Butch fights back with chops and Prince tags in to club him down. Some mounted punches from Prince. Stomps from Prince then he tries Bodhran beats but Butch counters with finger attacks as Corey Graves drops an Ashley Madison reference, because that’s timely. Wilson tags in but Butch makes his own save then Prince stops Wilson from falling off the apron, leading to Butch kicking them both. Prince and Ridge both tag in and Ridge runs wild for a bit before grabbing Prince off the top rope with a military press into a powerslam and Wilson breaks up the pin. Butch wipes out Wilson with a Shining Wizard and they move to the apron where Wilson back drops Butch. Ridge then suplexes Prince who starts clutching his knee. Prince clutches his knee while complaining about his back, Ridge wants to keep fighting and winds up kicked by Wilson then Prince with a school boy to get the pin.
OFFICIAL RESULT: Pretty Deadly won in 9:06
Rating: 2 stars
Thoughts: The Brutes are glorified jobbers without Sheamus so the outcome was never in doubt, if you enjoy Pretty Deadly’s schtick you probably enjoyed this more than I did and that’s completely fair.
We get a recap of Carlito’s return at Fastlane, then in the back Kayla talks with Carlito. Carlito describes his return as cool. Bobby Lashley interrupts, he was waiting for the apple and then says Carlito’s return was amazing, especially since the last time he was on TV Bobby was beating him up. Carlito agrees that happened a long time ago, and would like his return match to be against Bobby, Bobby declines and the Street Profits show up with a chair to lay him out. Bobby grabs the chair and goes to kill him but officials are here to break it up, Bobby warns Carlito not to bite off more than he can chew and we go to break on that pun.
Carlito is still down in the back, the LWO check on him and here’s Bayley to complain that Adam Pearce isn’t helping set up a party for Iyo. Zelina Vega steps to Bayley, they jaw jack and naturally we get a match.
In his locker room Roman sits, and Jimmy is here. Roman asks what Jimmy is doing, Jimmy says he’s trying to be Roman and he’s calling plays when Roman isn’t here. This amuses Roman who asks what he’d do right now. Jimmy wants to get Jey, Roman says Jey is the past and doesn’t matter. The titles matter, and Jey running around with Cody as his partner is just a slap in the face to their existence. So Jimmy gets handle that, and Roman is the only one calling plays, but he and Jimmy to fist bump. I guess we’ll have to wait for Roman to eviscerate Jimmy until a later date.
Bayley heads to the ring, that match will be up after this break.
Post break we get a recap of Iyo retaining her title at Fastlane and then Zelina Vega heads to the ring.
Match #2: Bayley w/ Iyo Sky and Dakota Kai vs. Zelina Vega
Bayley mocks Vega’s height and Vega then starts working her arm. Vega shoves her shoulder first into the corner then hits an arm drag. More arm drags from Vega then some elbows before Bayley lands a clothesline to slow things down. Sliding clothesline from Bayley gets a 2 count. Vega avoids a belly to belly suplex and hits a head kick, then drops Bayley into the bottom rope to set up a low 619. Kai fails on an interference attempt and Vega hits a Meteora for a near fall. Iyo blocks the refs view, allowing Bayley to hit a Rose Plant and win.
OFFICIAL RESULT: Bayley won in 2:40
Rating: 1.5 stars
Thoughts: More or less a squash, but with the structure I can’t quite rate it that.
Post match Iyo and Bayley attack Vega, but predictably here’s Poochie to menace them away and make sure we all wonder what she’s thinking when she’s not on screen.
After this break Triple H will talk.
Post break there’s confirmation about LA Knight vs. Solo Sikoa.
Here comes Triple H. Trips has a mic and basks in the crowd adulation for a few long moments and admits there’s a big part of him that misses that. He puts over the crowd and the WWE’s schedule, man he’s turning the color of Country Time pink lemonade just from talking. Anyway he’s here to put over an unsung hero of WWE, the man in the ring with him right now, Adam Pearce. Over the last three years Pearce has done a great job doing a thankless job, he’s overseen both RAW and Smackdown and he just wants to thank Pearce for that. With that in mind no one should do the job that Pearce is doing alone, and Trips is happy to announce that Pearce is getting a promotion to be the new general manager of RAW. Which means Smackdown needs someone to manage it, Dominik Mysterio interrupts this for no good reason. Dom says Fastlane wasn’t a success, Judgement Day got screwed out of their titles, Trips asks the fans to stop booing because he needs to hear this very important dialogue. Predictably this gets more sweetened boos as basically Dom wants to know why the tag team titles are booked for both Smackdown and RAW. Trips says he thought they were pumping in the boos but it’s legit, fortunately Trips can read lips and got the jist of things. But here’s the thing, Pearce is in charge of RAW, Dom needs to talk to the Smackdown GM, Nick Aldis. The former TNA champion is here in a blue suit and thanks WWE for the chance. He and Pearce shake hands in the spirit of competition then says it’s nice to meet Dom as he’s a big fan. . . of his dad. Aldis brings up the Jey to RAW move and says that the person joining Smackdown is, and Dom interrupts to draw this thing out much longer than necessary. Dom promises to slap whoever it is, cue Kevin Owens. Well that’s a tad underwhelming. Owens gets into the ring and Stuns Dom right away, then shakes hands with Aldis, then he complains that Dom didn’t slap him. I have no idea why that was so long.
In the back the Bloodline watch TV, and Roman isn’t happy with Owens being on his show. To say nothing of Jey and Cody on his show, or Jimmy on his couch. Roman just told him what to do, and now Jimmy is still here on the couch drinking Roman’s water. Jimmy asks if he’s serious, Roman laughs and says no, but imagine if he was. Jimmy then heads out, careful not to get between Roman and the camera, and calls on Solo, which Roman tells him to stop doing as we head to break. Once again I must reiterate, Jimmy isn’t Jey in terms of either crowd connection or chemistry with Roman.
Post break we get a video for Dragon Lee.
In the back Piper Niven and Chelsea Green complain to Nick ALdis that people think their titles are cursed, they want new belts. Aldis blows them off because Charlotte is here and clearly she’s more important. He says Charlotte should have won at Fastlane, and she’ll get a title shot next week. Jade Cargill is here though and stares down Charlotte and they awkwardly talk at each other.
To the ring here comes Jey Uso to a big pop. It’s nice to have the talented Uso back on Smackdown. Cody follows, and acknowledges a “Do you feel him sir” sign in the crowd. Credit to this crowd, they’ve been hot for the first hour. After this break we’ll get that tag team title match.
Post break we get a recap of Cody and Jey winning the belts then here come Grayson Waller and Grayson Waller-lite.
Match #3 – Tag Team Title Match: (c) Jey Uso and Cody Rhodes vs. Grayson Waller and Austin Theory
Waller and Cody start us off, Cody with kicks and a punch, then a Kitchen Sink knee lift. Waller tags out, but Cody quickly tries a Figure 4 on Theory and Theory scurries away. Once again Waller tags in and Cody goes for his arm then tags in Jey. Waller tries to headbutt Jey, that doesn’t work. Blind tag from Theory and he catches Jey with a backbreaker. Jey punches Theory into a corner, then punches Waller but Theory is able to toss him into a ring post and send us to break.
We come back to Theory working a rest hold. Jey fights back but gets slammed down by the hair. Some corner stomps from Theory then Waller tags in. Jey fights out of the corner but Theory cuts him off with a backbreaker to set up the Demolition Decapitation and a near fall. Again Jey fights back, hitting an enziguri and both men are down. Double hot tag and Cody gets to run wild on Theory for a bit including a snap powerslam and a disaster kick. Waller gets ejected but tries the rolling Stunner only to eat a disaster kick. Theory with an uppercut then his cross legged neckbreaker and Jey breaks up the pin. Jey superkicks Waller off the apron, then one for Theory to set up the Cody 1-D, Jey dives onto Waller for good measure and Cody ends things with the Cross Rhodes to win.
OFFICIAL RESULT: Cody Rhodes and Jey Uso won in 9:21
Rating: 2.5 stars
Thoughts: Perfectly acceptable match, Theory and Waller were never really in it but weren’t treated like total jobbers either.
Post match Jey and Cody are heading back up the ramp when Roman’s music hits. No Roman, just Jimmy and Solo who stare down Jey and Cody before Roman and Heyman do show up. Cody and Roman go face to face and Aldis comes down to get between them and beg them not to brawl tonight. Nice to see Cody and Roman still have that spark between them as we head to break.
Commentary runs down next weeks show, Charlotte vs. Iyo, and Santos Escobar takes on Montez Ford.
To the ring, here comes LA Knight to another big pop.
Match #4: Solo Sikoa vs. LA Knight
They tie up, Solo forces Knight into a corner then Knight avoids a cheap shot and lands strikes. Solo tosses Knight into the corner again but Knight fights out of it only to run into a back elbow from Solo. Knight counters a suplex with a neckbreaker for a 1 count. Some rope running and an awkward clash between them, not sure what happened there. Knight tries to lift Solo but Solo is too big and they he chops away at Knight. Knight dropkicks the knee of Solo then hits a low single leg dropkick and clotheslines Solo out of the ring. Dropkick through the ropes from Knight and he starts brawling with Solo around the ring. Back to the apron, Knight tries a suplex but Solo blocks and clocks him with a right hand then rams him into the ring post as we head to break.
Solo is working a nerve hold as we come back. Knight fights free, he tries a slam but Solo is too heavy and falls on him. Belly to belly from Solo gets a 2 count. Solo hits a corner hip attack, then some headbutts in the corner as well. Back to the nerve hold for Solo, Knight fights free and lands a back elbow out of the corner then a second rope bulldog for 2. Solo shoves Knight into the ropes and hits a Samoan drop for a 2 count. Knight tries a Sunset Flip, can’t get Solo over but he avoids the big sit counter and both men are down. Solo misses a corner avalanche and Knight then avoids a Stinger Splash and Solo hits the ring post. Knight starts in with the punches to wobble Solo, and he eventually drops him with a flying clothesline. DDT from Knight then corner stomps and a running knee strike. Knight wants another one but runs into Solo, Solo tries a Samoan drop but Knight avoids and hits a tilt a whirl powerslam and the Yeah Elbow. Solo avoids Blunt Force Trauma and we get a double clothesline spot to put both men down. Here’s Jimmy to get involved but Cena intercepts him with an Attitude Adjustment, Solo with a Samoan Spike to Cena but that opens him up for Knight’s Blunt Force Trauma and Knight pins Solo.
OFFICIAL RESULT: LA Knight won in 12:34
Rating: 3 stars
Thoughts: Solid match, Solo doesn’t eat pins very often so Knight getting one over him is still a pretty notable win. The action was good, Solo still struggles in some singles matches as he doesn’t have a lot of connective tissue to his ring work but only time can fix that.
Post match Knight is celebrating, only to get Speared into next week by Roman. Roman poses over Knight as the episode ends.
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