wrestling / Columns
The Happy-Go-Sucky Wrestling Report: 05.20.09
So I should warn you this week. I’ve spent a little time learning html, and I’m anxious to use it. In fact, I’ve spent so much time trying to figure out html, I ran out of time to think about what I was going to write here.
So enjoy the most html coded, picture filled, Happy-Go-Sucky Wrestling Report yet! Speaking of code…Cue Banner!
News: The WWE may move Raw to Colorado Springs in light of the Denver Nuggets game next Monday.
Happy: Why does it seem like every time Kobe Bryant comes to the state of Colorado, bad things happen?
The positive here is that at least the WWE has a backup plan and aren’t really getting beat up by the media. In fact, from what I’ve read and watched on TV, it seems like almost everyone is actually on the WWE’s side, including ESPN, which is a bit shocking.
I’m not an expert on Colorado’s geography or anything, but I am pretty sure that Colorado Springs isn’t that far of a drive from Denver. So the majority of those 10,000 tickets that were sold in advance should be in good shape.
However, if Vince decides to be stubborn, as he should be, Vince has said he will send his trucks to Denver regardless of whether the NBA will change the date for the game or not. In fact, Vince has said that he would “hold it in the parking lot if he had to”. And I have to tell you, I think that would be the greatest thing to ever happen in the WWE. It would be interesting to watch and after all the publicity the WWE has got from this little conflict, people would watch. The WWE has the chance to cash in on some rare good publicity, so I’m all about that!
Not to mention it would be a GREAT way to promote the Extreme Rules pay-per-view.
And can you imagine all the skits the WWE could pull off? They should totally send Santina Marella to the game and have “her” flash Kobe. Wait, it’s Kobe…in Colorado…that might not be a good idea.
Go Sucky: It’s really kind of tough to see anything positive coming out of this, especially from a wrestling fan’s point of view. The truth is, no matter how “big” a game Game 4 may be for Denver, the WWE would probably still outdraw them. This is in no part the WWE’s fault, especially since they signed the contract and did all the legal mumbo jumbo way back in August.
The real blame goes on the arena’s owners. You want to talk about shaming your city and your venue. Back in August, the NBA season hadn’t even STARTED, and they were already assuming that the Denver Nuggets wouldn’t be in the NBA finals.
And the NBA has been pretty useless too saying they can’t change the date and they are sure the Nuggets and the WWE will find a way to deal with it. That says to me that the NBA is pretty much saying, we ain’t doin’ jack and you’re out of luck Vince. It’s the NBA and the venue who screwed this up and they should be the ones forced to find “alternatives”, not the WWE.
So I wonder who Vince is rooting for this year?
By the way, does anyone else think this is the work of Owen Hart’s ghost? Maybe a little payback for all those times we called him a Nugget? What’s even weirder is all this will happen just 2 days after the 10th anniversary of his death! Spoooooky!
News: Ric Flair wants to return to wrestling.
Happy: No matter how old Ric Flair gets, and how less coherent he becomes, Ric Flair will never EVER be able to walk away from wrestling forever. I think we all knew this was coming and I think a lot of wrestling fans will welcome him with open arms. There’s a lot of unfinished business the WWE can pull off with Ric Flair, including making Ric the oldest WWE Champion of all time (perhaps by beating the youngest WWE Champion of all time?).
The positive I can find in this news bit is thinking about the WWE “reorganizing itself”, which we talked about last week. A lot of younger guys, if the WWE holds true to its word, will be making their way up the ranks fairly quickly. A lot of guys from FCW will be on their way up and the WWE may be adding a 5th show, and who knows if they’ll make it into a 4th brand. (With a Rise and Fall of WCW DVD coming out soon, I wouldn’t be surprised if we had a WCW brand with Ric Flair heading it up).
But I digress. Who better to learn about the business than a walking wrestling museum in Ric Flair? Even if Flair is only in the occasional wrestling match, I don’t see it being such a bad thing. Especially if it’s what’s best for the company and is helping mold younger wrestlers.
Besides, who else will we ever be able to get Evolution vs. Legacy? I sure hope they come out to the old Evolution theme!
Go Sucky: I’ll go ahead and state the obvious here. If Ric Flair returns to wrestling, and starts jobbing out to young nobodies, then his Wrestlemania 24 sendoff will be eternally tarnished, as will his Raw tribute the following night.
I understand Flair has burned out of his tour de gymnasiums, and that’s fine and good. But he doesn’t have to actually WRESTLE. There are GM positions opening up on a regular basis these days. Flair would be PERFECT for a GM role again.
Better yet, I’d love to see Ric Flair become the mouthpiece for a young up and coming superstar. Someone like Jack Swagger. The two of them cutting promos together would be fun…and slippery.
There are so many things that Ric Flair could do to protect his legacy and still be involved in the wrestling business. I really hope he changes his mind and stays out of regular competition.
News: No titles changed at Judgment Day this past Sunday.
Happy: Well it’s about freakin’ time! After all of them changing hands just 3 weeks ago at Backlash, if they had all changed again (like many thought they would), I would have just given up on prestige!
I see a lot of people leaving comments every time ratings go down that the champion of that brand should change. But I disagree. I think more people would watch a brand if the champion had been champion for awhile and there might be a slight chance that they may get beat. This will hopefully mean that by the time Extreme Rules comes about in a few weeks, all the champions will have at least held the title for over 30 days (which is a lifetime in Edge years). That idea, mixed with the Extreme Rules of the pay-per-view, should make for a better pay-per-view than Judgment Day for sure.
Go Sucky: The WWE really dug itself into a hole when they changed all 3 titles on a B-list pay-per-view in Backlash. It’s my opinion that people who spend the money on pay-per-views want to see one of three things when they spend that 50 bucks or so. They want to see good wrestling, good spots, or a title change. They can get decent wrestling and decent spots for free and of course the occasional title change. But when you spend that kind of money and nothing of note happens (excluding Flair’s return), it leaves you with an empty feeling and makes you think twice before spending that kind of money on a wrestling pay-per-view ever again.
Shows like Wrestlemania, The Royal Rumble, Summerslam, and Survivor Series are all wrestling staples, and are usually annually worth the money. But when you’re talking about shows like Backlash, Judgment Day, Cyber Sunday, No Mercy, and so on, you’re talking about shows that aren’t always going to get good buyrates. So these shows need something a little extra to boost their buyrates. Bad wrestling, little storyline movement, and no title changes really won’t help these “smaller shows” in the long run.
News: TNA is apparently no longer booking Bobby Lashley until he signs a contract.
Happy: Well dur dur dur TNA! Why would you do that in the 1st place? Lockdown was a good pay-per-view for TNA and the fact that they had Lashley come in and hyped this “former world champion signing with TNA” to get people to buy the pay-per-view, only to have him not sign at all is just retarded.
Bobby Lashley really has nothing to offer TNA and the fact that he showed up and pointed at people a couple of times would be well worth forgetting ever happened. Lashley really turned some heads last week with his third MMA victory. If he has more victories like that, he won’t need wrestling anymore. He can just take a look at Brock Lesner and see his future.
Go Sucky: I have a pet peeve about not finishing storylines. Imagine how I felt when ABC cancelled Pushing Daisies before I ever found out if Chuck’s dad was ever killed again?
We may never know if TNA was pushing Lashley toward joining the Main Event Mafia, or the Front Line. And to have that happen during one of the most popular periods for TNA is just bad business. TNA will hopefully learn their lesson from this and move forward like it never happened. Contracts are our friends mmmkay?
Mmmmkay.
News: The WWE may be heading toward a new “submission style” pay-per-view. Names being discussed for the event include WWE Submit & Quit, WWE Total Submission, WWE Submission Sunday and WWE Breaking Point.
Happy: I’m digging it. I’m not sure if I particularly like the names of the pay-per-views, but that’s the last thing I care about when it comes to a wrestling pay-per-view. (Unless of course it’s Wrestlemania, then I care.)
The fact that the WWE is planning an event like this is a positive step toward them keeping their word about “re-making” themselves. Last week, the WWE said they wanted to focus more on wrestling, and with a submissions only pay-per-view, they’d have no choice!
Not to mention that one of those “small, minor” pay-per-views we talked about earlier might actually take on some meaning. One Night Stand/Extreme Rules has done really well for the past few years and I can see an MMA crowd who also watches wrestling being attracted to this kind of match. So we get rid of one crappy pay-per-view, and get something different. It’s a winning situation in my opinion.
Go Sucky: However, a full night of nothing but submission matches may just overwhelm wrestling fans. I mean, we’re not really used to this much WRESTLING are we?
Honestly, that’s all I got. Other than the quality of finishes, which we’ve all come to know and loathe with the WWE, this is a pay-per-view that should really help change things around for the WWE, at least once a year.
Rapid Fire!
News: Lacey Von Erich was diagnosed with meningitis over the weekend after being hospitalized for a massive migraine headache.
God bless the Von Erich’s. What is it about tragedy following the Von Erich family? Here’s hoping for a speedy recovery for Lacey.
News: Raw scored a 3.6 rating, up from 3.3 last week.
Vicki vs. Santina = Win!
News: The Great American Bash will just be called “The Bash”.
Soon to follow, pay-per-views named “Rumble, Way Out, Series, Mercy, and Cyber”. Although I expect that last one might be trademarked by some porn studio.
News: Jeremy Borash Twittered that Kurt Angle was recently contacted about appearing on next year’s Dancing With The Stars.
Next week on Dancing With The Stars…
News: So Cal Val will join Lauren and Jeremy Borash backstage on Impact and on the road.
The Bob says keep your eyes in their sockets JB.
And that’s going to do it for this week. Until next week my friends, may your lives be Happy…or Go Sucky!
