411’s WWE RAW Report 12.7.15

It’s beginning to look a lot like….

AJ!!!!

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After a recap of The Birth of The League of Nations, we are joined by them in the ring. They have their own entrance video and music. Sheamus is supremely happy. He has spent all day trying to figure out what he would say regarding this Sunday’s match against Reigns. The truth is that it was a waste of time, because all we need to know is right here. He points to the shirt he’s trying so desparately to sell. The crowd WHATs him for a bit. Sheamus wants to say that the WWE has officially entered into the International Era. Four premiere atheletes from four of the greatest countries in the world: Bulgaria, Mexico, England, Ireland. Sheamus says he tried to include America, but they couldn’t find anyone worthy.

YOU ESE chant for Del Rio. The crowd really loves them some Mexican.

The crowd says Sheamus looks stupid, and Sheamus says only those who were laid out last week looked stupid. There are no four men that can match The League of Nations, because they’re the best of the best of the best of the best of the best of the best….

The lights go out.

They come back on.

Bray Wyatt and The Wyatt Family are in the ring!

YES Chant takes some time to start, but they eventually get there.

Bray begs for pardon, and says they haven’t been properly introduced. He introduces himself and his brothers. They don’t care too much about their Nations. Matter of fact, this is all his world and he is just allowing them to breathe in it. The League laughs off Bray. Bray says they come out here and talk about dominance, but The Wyatts didn’t come out here to talk. They came out here for the chaos. Bray removes the fedora, so you know it’s real.

Before they can tango, The Dudley Boyz make their grand entrance. Tommy Dreamer brings up their behind. The Dudleyz will see their chaos, and raise them to the EXTREME! This isn’t just a catchphase, it’s a way of life.

Bray cuts them off by yelling that Bubba is a fool. He wants to gie them a message one last time; they are outmanned, outgunned. Go ahead and do theirselves a little favor, and do not get in Bray’s way.

D-Von says they’re wrong. When you’re extreme, you don’t die…you multiply!

ENTER THE…….

Rhyno.

Well then…

Just as The Dudleyz and Co head down the ramp, Roman Reigns music breaks up the party. He and his fellas enter through the crowd as we go to commercial.

Apparently we have a 16-Man Fatal Four Way Tag Team Elimination Match

Oh, and The Dudley Boyz, Dreamer, and Rhyno are called “Team Extreme”

Match 1: 16-Man Fatal Four Way Tag Team Elimination Match
Team ECW vs League of Nations vs Roman Candles vs The Wyatt Brothers
I’ll go ahead and start with Bubba and D-Von hitting a double flapjack to Luke Harper. D-Von’s the legal man. He gets kicked by Harper, but Dean flies off the top rope, sending Harper to the outside. Del Rio enters with a backstabber to Dean, and a pin for 1..2….NO! Tag to Rusev, and they hit a double back suplex to D-Von. Rusev covers D-Von for 1..2..NO! Rusev attacks Dean, but Dean hops over, crawls under, and tags in Uso 1. Bray Wyatt finally enters the match, and he attacks Uso 1. He clubs the back as D-Von whips Rusev, which is reversed. Bray continues to punish Jimmy. Shoulder tackle to Del Rio. Tag to Rhyno. He rushes in with a belly to belly to Bray, which Cole calls Classic Rhyno. Tag to Braun. Rhyno doesn’t back down, but he gets trucked through quickly. Rusev is met with the same fate. Strowman grabs Rhyno, but he reaches for a tag and Dreamer is in. They double team Braun, sending him to the outside. Tommy goes for a piledriver to Jimmy Uso, but Rusev hits a SUperkick! Fallaway Slam to Jimmy Uso! Rusev shoves Rowan off the apron, and he goes to the top rope. Jimmy is here with a chop. Another. Tag to Jey. Double superplex it looks like. Strowman is here, however, and he heads underneath the pile. He drops the pile of men, and they all land on Tommy Dreamer! The ring clears. Rowan is the legal man. He goes for a kick. Dreamer ducks. Dreamer Driver! Pin for 1…2…3!!!

The Wyatt Family is Eliminated

Bray slinks out of the ring like the loser that he is.

Back, after a break, and Del Rio is covering Del Rio. Kickout at 1. Del Rio tosses who I assume to be Jey into the corner. Del Rio with an enziguri. Cole confirms it’s Jey. Pin for 1..2..NO! Del Rio tags in Sheamus. Sheamus in and gets hit with a swinging neckbreaker to Sheamus. Tag to Bubba. He blocks a right by Sheamus. Some rights and a whip. Clothesline to Sheamus. Rock Bottom by Bubba! Pin for 1..2…N!O Broken up by Barrett. EVERYONE GETS IN THE RING AND THE CROWD LOVES IT!!! We settle down with Ryhno and Roman Reigns in the middle of the ring. OOOOO, ARTIFICAL BIG MOMENTS!!

Reigns backs up a bit. They lock eyes. They’re about to get down, but Sheamus and Rusev are in the ring and break up the fun. The Dudley Boyz enter the ring! 3D to Rusev!!! Sheamus turns around, and gets body slammed for his troubles! D-Von heads to the top rope! They’re going for the WAZZZZUP but Del Rio distracts! He shoves D-Von off the apron. Bubba goes to attack. BROGUE KICK TO D-VON! Pin for 1..2….3!!!!

Team Extreme has been eliminated

The Hardy Boyz are not here, so please do not get confused.

Dean Ambrose is in the ring. He calls for a fight. League of Nations regroups. Sheamus is in. Tag to Rusev. Cole argues that because it’s Dean Ambrose’s birthday, he wants to fight especially more. Idiot. Dean with the chop and jabs. He hits the ropes. Crossbody. He attacks the head of Rusev with right hands. Dean bounces off the corner and hits a forearm. Running bulldog out of the corner. Dean Ambrose goes up top. He looks to fly. Elbow drop! Pin for 1..2…NO! Dean grabs the head and goes for a Russian Leg Sweep! Hits it, and we’re back to some cologne ads!

Back, after a break, and one of the Usos is trying to fight out of the barrage of chest bumps from Sheamus. Reigns enters to break it up. The ref admonishes him as Barrett grabs Jey’s foot to prevent a tag. Del Rio is in. Kick to the face and a cover for 1..2..NO! Del Rio sends Jey into the corner and attacks with right hands. Tag to Rusev. Rusev with a hard whip to the corner. He locks in a bear hug. Jey fights out of the hold with headbutts, then boxes the ears. Rusev drops Jey. Rusev with a tag to the King. He heads in and kicks Jey in the back then stomps in the corner. He lifts Jey up, backs up out of the corner, then runs for a knee, but Jey moves and Barrett gets hung up on the ropes! Jey stretches forward for a tag. He hops. Tag to Reigns, and the crowd LOVES it! Clothesline to Del Rio, who was tagged in as well. Del Rio with a whip reversal, and Reigns hits another clothesline. Reigns runs into a boot in the corner. Reigns rolls up Del RIo then lifts him and just drops Del Rio on his back. Reigns in the corner, calls for the Superman Punch. He runs, but Barrett hangs over the ropes. Barret gets hit with the punch for his troubles! Del Rio tries to attack, but Reigns drops him over the shoulder onto the apron. Sheamus tries to attack, but Ambrose enters and sends him to the outside! Reigns heads to the outside! Driveby to Sheamus! Rusev is on the side. Ambrose dives onto him! Del Rio is up! He sends Roman into the barricade, but The Usos are in the ring! They dive atop the pile of men!! Reigns sends Del RIo int othe ring. Sheamus distracts. Superkick from Del Rio! Cover for 1…2…NO!!! Del Rio grabs the arm! CROSS ARM BREAKER!!! Jey Uso is on th top rope! He flies off with a splash! Del Rio rolls to the corner and tags in Sheamus! He calls for the Brogue as Reigns struggles on the mat.

Sheamus mocks Reigns’ little Superman taunt. Sheamus runs for the Brogue! REIGNS WITH A SPEAR!!!! PIN FOR 1…2….3!!!!
Official Result: Roman’s Boys
Not nearly as awesome as JBL would have you believe, but still fun.
Rating: **1/2

Backstage, Charlotte and Flair are talking silently. Deviously. Dirtily. Just up to no goodly.

Further backstage, Sheamus is walking around with his title. Renee Young rushes to him to ask if he’s going to lose on Sunday, too. Sheamus takes offense. Sheamus quotes Vince McMahon, then says Reigns was the closest he’d ever get to be beating him for the title. He says we may have witnessed a miracle. At TLC, he’s going to smash Reigns’ face in, rip his hair out, smash his teeth, grind them down, and he may just do it in less than 5 minutes and 15 seconds.

Renee is all, “Shut up” and asks if Sheamus learned a lesson from all of this.

Sheamus says the only lesson is the one that he’ll teach Roman later tonight in front of the entire world.

FURTHER backstage, Cody Rhodes is wearing 3D glasses. He says some stuff. He says he’s going to eviscerate our All-American Hero, Jack Swagger. He smells something. It’s Titus! Titus tells Cody that he needs to get him some. He says Stardust needs Stardust time. He asks if Cody can read. Cody: “At the highest level.” hahaha. He also suggests strong wine. Cody says he will not rest until the universe is eclipsed with darkness and sorrow. Titus holds his hand up in the fae of Cody. Cody talks around the hand. Titus says he’ll see Cody out there. Cody is confused by this.

The following match is Dolph vs Kevin Owens, but before Owens heads out, Breeze is here to make an appearance.

Match 2: Dolph Ziggler vs Kevin Owens
Lockup to start. Owens forces Dolph down. Owen gloats. Dolph tries to shoot the leg, but Owens grabs the head and drops to a knee. Dolph rolls Owens over for a pin. Gets a 1. Backstage, Ambrose has a tub of popcorn and a jack and coke. Owens with a takedown. Turns this into a front faced headlock. Dolph escapes and works the arm. Owens in seated position. Grabs the head, turns into the hold and backs against the ropes. He shoves Dolph. Dolph shoves back. He goes into the ropes to break a hold. Dolph is held back. Owens enters. He rushes forward with a side headlock. Drops to a knee. Push against the ropes, and Owens wit a shoulder tackle. Pin for 1…NO! He locks the head from behind. Dolph escapes. Failed pin attempt and a front face lock into a headlock. Dolph turns him over into a pin. 1…2…NO! Dolph locks the head. Owens with a forearm to the back .He breaks the hold. Go behind. Dolph goes for the leg and locks from behind as well. He hooks the leg to prevent forward movement. Owens escapes and sends Dolph into the corner. Hard chop in the corner. Owens with a forearm to the back. He pulls back on Dolph’s head and clubs the right side of Dolph’s face. Owen with a whip to the ropes. Dolph comes back with a chop to the face. Right hands. Owens misses a clothesline. Dolph goes for the DDT, but Owens shoves him away. Owens with an attack, but Dolph hits a dropkick. Splash in the corner. Goes for a superkick, but Owens rolls out of the ring. He’s on the apron and hangs Dolph up, sending him into the middle of the ring. Owens rolls to the outside. He heads to the other side of the steps as Dolph chases him. Dolph with a headbutt, but he runs into a kick. Owens goes for a body slam, Dolph lands on his feet. Owens turns him. Fallaway Slam into the barricade!!! Owens grabs Dolph and sends him back in the ring. Cover for 1…2..NO! Another pin for 1…2…NO! Another! 1…NO! Owens mounts Dolph and gets some hard right hands. Dolph turns on his belly, so Owens socks the back. Owens with a right. Dolph holds his fists up. Owens with another right. Dolph hits Owens with a hard right to the face. Left. He tries to fight back, but Owens with an elbow to the face! Cover for 1…2..NO! Owens rubs the forearm across Dolph’s face. HARD chop from Owens! Body slam to Dolph. Owens hits the ropes. Goes for the senton, but Dolph rolls out of the way! Owens is up first. He goes for a right. Dolph blocks and hits one of his own. Again. He gets a few more right hands in, whips Owens, this is revesed. Owens with a splash attempt, but Dolph moves. DOlph goes for a splash, but Owens moves! Owens grabs Dolph and tosses him into the corner! Dolph’s shoulder hits the ringpost hard!! Dolph tumbles to the outside. Dolph is up at 7. He’s trying to get into the ring. He makes it at 9!!! As soon as he rolls in, though, Owens hits a rolling senton!!! Pin for 1…2…NO!! Owens argues with the ref.

Back, and I didn’t get to pee. Owens with a short clothesline. Pin for 1…2..NO! Owens is very displeased. He locks a hold in fro mbehind. Ambrose is still watching backstage. Breeze is still ringside drinking appletinis. Ziggler drops, hitting Owens jaw with his head. Owens rushes the corner, but Ziggler moves. Owens hits the post. Owens rushes forward and gets clotheslined from Dolph. Splash in the corner. Neckbreaker from Dolph. He hits the elbow drop and pins for 1…2.NO! Ziggler is up first. He goes for the DDT, but Owens shoves Ziggler over the ropes to the outside!!! Breeze is standing near the announce table again. Ref hits the count of five, and Owens exits the ring, apparently not wanting to win by countout. DDT BY ZIGGLER!!! Ziggler grabs Owens at the count of 6. He sends Owens back in the ring. Dolph enters at 8. Pin for 1….2..NO! Both men up. Ziggler goes for the Fameasser, but Owens dodges and hits a release German Suplex!!! Dolph in the corner. Owens goes for the cannonball! Dolph moves!! Owens collides with the corner! He turns. FAMEASSER! Pin for 1…2…..NO! Dolph goes for the Zig Zag, and Owens holds the ropes. SUPERKICK to Owens! Dolph bounces off the ropes! SUPERKICK by Dolph!! Dolph falls on Owens! Pin for 1…2……NO!!!! Ziggler grabs the head of Owens. He pulls Owens up. Dolph with a right hand. Owens falls to the mat. iggler lifts him for another one. Owens drops.

Owens pushes Ziggler to the ropes. POP-UP Powerbomb! Pin for 1…2…..3!!!!
Official Result: Kevin Owens
Good match, although it did have some sort of idontknowwhat missing.
Rating: ***1/2

Immediately after the pin, Ambrose’s music hits. He comes out with his popcorn and soda. Owens yells for his music to be played. Dean enters the ring with his treats. Owens wants his music. Dean tosses the popcorn and soda into the face of Owens, then leaves the ring.

Who did it better?

The Wyatt Family – the team that Tommy Dreamer just eliminated – is on the big screen. He claims that there are four blind mice, lost. He turns to Braun. Strowman says he has a dream. He becomes Tommy Dreamer’s nightmare. He will squeeze the life from him until he gasps his last breath. Wyatt tells him to show Dreamer what it truly means to be extreme. RUN.

…..
…..
….

Guys….seriously…..run. Geez.

The Miz is backstage with Neville. He tells him that with the proper packaging and right direction, Miz Productions can take Neville to the Next Daniel Bryan. Just to give him some A-List treatment, Miz wants to introduce Donny Deutsch. His show airs after RAW tonight. It’s the best show ever. Miz interrupts and says MizTV is the shit. Donny says Miz is chump change, but he’ll get to Donny’s level eventually. He invites Neville on his show. Miz give Neville his cardigan. It’s cute. goes well with Neville’s hair.

Match 3: Team B.A.D. (Naomi and Sasha Banks) vs. Brie Bella and Alicia Fox
We’re starting with Alicia’s forehead vs Sasha’s. Sasha shoves. Aliia chases. Sasha uses the ropes to break the hold, tries for a leg scissors, but Alicia grabs the legs and pulls Sasha up then puts an L to her forehead. Sasha hits the ropes. Tilt-a-whirl backbreaker. Sasha with a tag to Naomi. Naomi in with a hard takedown to Alicia. Naomi hops under a leap frog, and Alicia hits another tilt-a-whirl backbreaker. Pin for 1…2..NO! Naomi rolls out of the ring for a break. Sasha checks on Naomi. Brie and Alicia Fox hit a double baseball slide. They look for cheers, but the crowd isn’t having it. Alicia heads to the outside and sends Naomi in the ring. She follows. Tamina on the apron. She grabs the weave and brings Alicia down hard. Naomi with stomps. She tags in Sasha. Sasha puts her boot up in the corner. Naomi sends Alicia into it. Sasha mocks Brie then hits a few kicks in the corner. She tags Naomi back in, and this time Naomi holds the boot up. Naomi with a hard dropkcik in the corner. She drags Alicia away from the ropes and covers for .1..2…NO! Cravat from behind. Alicia turns into the hold. Naomi drops her. She grabs the hair and sends Alicia into the corner. Tag to Sasha, who, again, puts the boot up in the corner. Snapmare from Sasha. She pulls back with a chin lock. Alicia with an arm drag. Clothesline from Sasha. Pin for 1..2..NO! Sasha with a body slam attempt, but Alicia falls back ad goes for a rollup. 1..2..NO! Sasha shoves Brie off the apron then looks to toss Alicia into Naomi’s boot, but Alicia reverses and Sasha runs into Naomi’s boot! Tag to Naomi. Tag to Brie. Brie with a bulldog! Some boos from the crowd. Brie sets up the kicks. Yes kicks to Naomi. Dropkick to Naomi! Brie Mode. Knee to Naomi! Cover for 1…2…NO! Sasha is here to break it up. Alicia is in the ring to interrupt, but Sasha sends her out.

Brie sends Sasha out. Sasha grabs the foot of Brie long enough for Naomi to hit the Rear View and pin for 1…2…3!!!
Official Result: Team B.A.D.
Oh Sasha…
Rating: **

The match ends, and NEW DAY is here!!!!! Team B.A.D. seems confused. New Day head out with their unicorn horns. They head to the ring. Team BAD looks to fight. New Day tells em not to worry. Team BAD stare at the guys horns. The ones on their head. New Day has some extra horns! They gives a horn to each of the ladies, then fist bump. We get a New Day Rocks chant, and Sasha shaking her ass, hereby making me completely vulnerable to any and every wish she commands….

Let us rejoice in the twerking of Sasha until I find the unicorn one.

New Day cuts a promo regarding this Sunday that I miss due to having to pee. It was New Day-tastic.

The Usos are ringside with Cole and Co.

Match 4: New Day vs Lucha Dragons
Kofi and Sin Cara start. Sin Cara works the arm from behind, then chops Kofi. Whip to the ropes. Kofi holds on and tags in Big E. Sin Cara with a dropkick to Big E, sending him off the apron. Kofi tries to attack, but Sin Cara ducks a clothesline and dives through the ropes…right into the waiting arm of Big E. Belly to Belly!!! Woods lays down on his side and plays the trombone in Sin Cara’s dace. hahaha.

Back, after a break, and Big E gets a tag to Kofi. Sin Cara gets Kalisto in. He lays in with some kicks. Springboard super spinning burrito!!! He looks to dive onto Big E, but Kofi sends him to the outside. Tag to Big E. Big E drops down to the mat and lifts Kalisto. He runs, and drives him hard into the barricade! Big E sends Kalisto in the corner and stomps. Tag to Kofi. Kofi stomps while Woods preaches on the outside. It’s beautiful. Tag to Big E. Stomps. Tag to Kofi. Whip-assisted dropkick to Kalisto in the corner. Kick to the back of the head from Kofi. Pin for 1..2..NO! Kofi looks to attack Sin cara, giving Kalisto a chance for a hurricanrana. Tag to Big E. Tag to Sin Cara. Springboard crossbody off the ropes! Blind tag to Kofi. Sin Cara hits the ropes. Springboard moonsault!! Sin Cara goes to cover Big E, but Kofi is the legal man! Kick to Sin Cara’s face.

Ringside, Woods blows the trombone in the face of The Usos. The Usos beatdown Woods near the table!! “Beat him like he stole somethin!”

Kofi screams from in the ring. We get a rollup on Kofi. Pin for 1..2….3!!!
Official Result: Lucha Dragons
How heelish, Usos…how oh so very heelish.
Rating: *

The Usos stole the unicorn horns and trombone.

Backstage, Young asks Reigns if he’s worried about the lesson he’ll learn later tonight. “What is he, a professor now?”

…….

Reigns claims he can teach Sheamus what it feels like to be blistered by chairshots, or fall 15 feets onto a mountain of tables. He’s going to teach Sheamus what it feels like to be former WWE Champion. That’s just at TLC. As far as tonight, if Sheamus wants to teach him a lesson, we’ll see who goes to school and who doesn’t.

Apparently, THE WORLD is wondering if Charlotte is turning.

Miz is out to host MizTV. He brings up Paige supposedly being a guest. Not sure why. He then introduces Flair and his son Charlie.

Charlotte claims that this is not how you introduce a legend, then says Miz should pull a Tyra Banks and quit his own show. She introduces the 16-time World Heavyweight Champion, the ONLY Two Time WWE Hall of Famer, and the greatest competitor to ever step foot in this ring. She says Miz has ten minutes on Rolex time.

Miz calls this adorable and brings up a few months ago when Charlotte was in tears, gushing over her BFFs. This is much different than the arrogant miss thang in front of us today. Ric must be proud. Ric says every day, she is growing confidence, learning how to live as a champion. He plans on seeing Charlotte retain her title, because he’ll be there this Sunday. Miz calls this breaking news. He brings up the rumor mill, and this “new attitude” of Charlotte, saying people have called her self-serving, egotistical, bla bla bla.

Charlotte questions why this attack? Is it because she’ll do whatever it takes to keep her title, or is it because she’s not a man. She then tells Miz she feels sorry for his wife. Miz stands up, removes his glasses. He says he sees what Charlotte is trying to do, but changing the subject is not going to distract Miz. This isn’t about him or his wife, it’s about Charlotte and her controversial win at Survivor Series. After all those things Paige said, Charlotte remained silent, but what does Charlotte have to say in return.

Charlotte says if she has anything to say, she’ll say it on Sunday. MIz says that Flair has taught Charlotte well. Paige interfered with Charlotte’s friendship with Becky Lynch. This is her forum to respond to Paige, and she wants to turn it down? Why won’t she answer the question.

Flair stands up in between Charlotte and Miz. Flair says we’re not going to bump the ratings of Miz TV here. Miz brings up what Paige said, how Flair is an old far, hogging the spotlight, and that the only reason Charlotte is here is because of Flair.

Charlotte says the only thing lower on the food chain than Miz is the backstabbing, two-faced, gothic piece of trash. Sunday, Paige doesn’t have to worry about being champion ever again, because Charlotte is going to destroy her for everything she has said about her and her family. Paige will be lucky if she ever wrestles again after Sunday.

Miz is so glad that Charlotte said that, because Paige is actually here….

That kinky little elf is here with a mic, while Miz gloats as if he’s Jerry Springer in his first year.

Paige says that she is here, and she is all Charlotte’s. Flair tries to tell Charlotte that this is a ploy to upset Charlotte. Flair says that they are champions, and they look to head out of the ring. Flair stays in. Paige taps his shoulder, then slaps Flair right in the face. She mocks the strut. Charlotte stands ringside in awe. Flair turns to his daughter, says “Get her!” Charlotte slides in the ring and tries to attack, but Paige makes it to the outside and heads up the rmap, gloating.

This is her house.

Rusev’s little name graphic looks 1999 ECW bad.

We get a mini promo where Lana forgives Ryback, and it was an accident.

Match 5: Ryback vs Rusev
Bell rings, and Rusev rolls to the outside of the ring. He holds his back, and paces a bit. Rusev heads to the steps. He’s back on the apron, and heads back in. Rusev continues to stall, pulling the ropes. We finally lock up. Rusev ends up to the outside. Ryback flies over the top rope atop Rusev. He spins in the freakin air. Byron nearly negates the awesomeness of this by calling Ryback “Flyback.”

Back in the ring, Ryback covers for 1…2.NO! He shoves Rusev in the corner. Hard elbows. Ryback with a suplex. Pin for 1..2..NO! Ryback ends up on the outside again, but this time it’s because Rusev sends him over the top ropes. Ryback hops on the apron. Rusev grabs the arm and hangs it up on the ropes.

Back to the show, and Ryback tries to press Rusev, but can’t hack it. Rusev works the left arm a bit more, wrapping it around the ropes and putting the boot to it. Rusev with a whip to Ryback, sending him into the corner. Rusev with a cover for 1..2…NO! Ryback grabs the left arm. Twists it, drops it on the shoulder. He hits shoulder to shoulder. Rusev with another attack to the shoulder, but Ryback hits a Belly to Belly to create separation!!! The audience is hungry. They would like to be fed. More. Ryback with a tackle. Another. He ducks a clothesline and hits a battering ram to the chest of Ryback. Ryback shoves Rusev into the corner. Shoulders a few times, then a whip. Reversed, but Rusev hits an elbow. Ryback goes to the 2nd rope. Dropkick to Rusev. Cover for 1…2..NO! Rusev leaves the ring. Ryback follows, and chases him. Rusev circles the ring. Ryback follows closely. Ryback TRUCKS Lana down! Lana reaches for her leg.

Ryback tries to help Lana, but she tells him to get away. Rusev sends Ryback into the steps. The ref rings the bell for the double countout.
Official Result: No Contest
Surprisingly fun match
Rating: **

Rusev stomps the back of Ryback. Lana’s cry turns into a grin, and she takes a few steps forward to prove she is not hurt. Rusev locks in The Accolade.

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We return to a match already in progress, which is code for “Who cares.”

Match 6: Stardust vs Jack Swagger
Swagger has the Patriot Lock in. Cody reaches the ropes to break the hold. Del Rio’s music hits, and Swagger is distracted enough for Stardust to send Swagger’s arm into the ring post. He enters the ring and attacks the back of the leg. Stomp to the chest. Cody with the kicks in the corner. Cody hits Swagger with a knee, then a right hand to the face. Kick to the gut. Cody with another right. He pulls back on the mouth of Swagger. Titus explains that he wants Cody to return to the way he once was. Swagger with clotheslines. Swagger goes for a Swagger Bomb, but Cody has his boots up. Swagger is able to turn and slam Cody down. Pin for 1..2…NO! Cody with a kick. He drops to the mat and kicks Swagger’s head.

Cody goes for Beautiful Disaster, but Swagger grabs the leg. Patriot Lock. Stardust taps!
Official Result: Jack Swagger
Well then…
Rating: 1/2*

Right after cody taps, Del Rio enters the ring and smacks Swagger in the back with a chair. Stardust stands up. Del Rio turns and hits Cody in the midsection with the chair. He attacks the back. Del Rio heads to the outside. He’s about to attack some more, but Swagger has a chair of his own. What COULD THIS POSSIBLY LEAD TO!?! They smack each other’s chair. Del Rio nearly trips over Zeb then heads to the back. Swagger yells at Zeb. He places Zeb’s right hand over his heart, and asks “What about this.”

Zeb revs his scooter up and heads backstage. That oprobably shouldn’t be funny, but it is.

We get Adam Rose’s new little segment, where he calls neville Dumby and makes fun of Tommy Dreamer’s tan form last week. A bit funnier than last week, but still relatively pointless. And let’s face it, knock knock jokes are funnier than last week.

Backstage, Del Rio is taking offense to the crowd laughing at him tripping. He tells Zeb that he should have gotten out of his way. Del Rio tells Zeb that he doesn’t need him. He tells him to stay in the back from now on. Zeb tells Del Rio to stop being such a hot head. Del Rio says he doesn’t need Zeb again. Zeb says if it wasn’t for him, Del Rio would not be the champion right now. Del Rio tells him to shut up, and if he keeps running his mouth, he’s going to use the chair on him, just like he will on Swagger this Monday. Again, Zeb scoots away. Del Rio throws a chair at some pipes while Zeb moves at roughly .5 MPH.

Smoking can cause cancer, and so can The Bellas.

Match 7: Tommy Dreamer vs Braun Strowman
Dreamer on the offense with right hands, but its short lived as Braun just tosses him sideways. Tommy tries to hype himself up. He attacks the back, hits the ropes, and runs int the mountain of a man. Braun attacks the back. Braun with a boot to the face against the ropes. Shoulder thrust in the corner. High knee. Shoulder again. Braun attacks the back. Knee to the back in the corner. Braun with a whip to the corner, hard. Tommy tumbles down. Boot to the face. Bodyslam from Braun. He cinches the shoulder. Tommy tries to fight back, hits the ropes, goes for a clothesline. Dropkicks the leg. DDT attempt, but Braun holds on and locks in the bearhug.

In about 2 seconds, Tommy Dreamer knocks out and the ref calls the match.
Official Result: Braun Strowman
Boring squash
Rating: NR

The moment you’ve been waiting for….

Back to RAW, and Reigns is in the middle of the ring with a ladder. He says this brings him back to his first day. He and The Shield’s first match was at TLC. He says they started at the bottom, and now he’s here. He climbs the ladder and claims that he got higher and he could see thepromise land. Then, at Survivor Series, he won the title. He brings up the 5:15, and says he ended up down at the bottom of the ladder again.

This brings him to Sheamus. He is taking back what’s his come Sunday. He tells Sheamus to stop wasting time and come out.

Sheamus is quick to head out and say that Reigns has a nice little imagination. He wonders if Reigns is trying to intimidate Sheamus. Sequels are in these days, and at TLC, it’ll end just like Survivor Series did; with Sheamus standing above Reigns as the champion.

Reigns tells Sheamus he is standing right there. “Come on.” Reigns says he thought the Irish like to fight, he must have been mistaken. Sheamus says that’s true. Reigns says Sheamus is still talking. Sheamus says he will fight Roman, just not tonight.

Reigns continues to call out Sheamus, says he thought Irish men have potatoes, and Sheamus is just smuggling some tater tots…..

There was a famine, Roman! A FAMINE!!!

Sheamus is about to run up three tables laid against the apron as the crowd chants tater tots.

THIS IS WHY!!!

Reigns continues to laugh off everything Sheamus says, and tells him to man up, come in the ring, and show him how to do it “son.”

Sheamus says if he goes in, Reigns will just hit him with a chair. Reigns calls Sheamus tater tot, and drops a chair to the outside of the ring. Sheamus calls this cute. He points out the table that’s in the ring. Reigns says he really does want to powerbomb Sheamus through a table. Reigns tells the crowd that he’s gotta get him in the ring first, then proceeds to remove the table he just promised the crowd he’d powerbomb Sheamus into out of the ring. He continues to call Sheamus tater tot. Sheamus points out the ladder still in the middle of the ring. He wants it gone, and maybe he’ll consider going into the ring and kicking Reigns’ head off. Reigns pretends to toss the ladder over the top rope to Sheamus, then laughs it off. Sheamus looks worried. Reigns turns, then really does launch the ladder over the top rope towards Sheamus. Sheamus dodges it. Crowd chants tater tot.

Reigns wants to know if Sheamus is a champion, or just a footnote. He says if Sheamus doesn’t get in the ring, the only thing he’ll have left is the dumbass shirt that he’s wearing. Sheamus rushes the ring. Reigns attacks with rights. He tosses Sheamus RIGHT OUT OF THE RING….after 10 minutes of trying to convince him to get INTO it. Reigns tosses Sheamus into the barricade, then goes through all the work to remove the top from the announce table, even though there are tables all around the ring. Sheamus reverses and sends Reigns head into the announce table. Sheamus sends Reigns into a ladder, then clotheslines him over the barricade. They’re in the crowd, now, and Reigns hits a right hand then toses Sheamus into a trash can. We’re near the stage now, and Sheamus is hitting Reigns with some uppercuts. There’s a table set up nearby against a ladder. Reigns tosses Sheamus into it. It does not break. On the ramp, Reigns grabs Sheamus by the head and sets up for a powerbomb. Sheamus reverses, and drops Reigns on his back. Sheamus removes his shirt (which you could by on WWESHOP right now!) He whips Reigns into a pile of chairs, then grabs one and hits Reigns on the back. Sheamus with another chair shot to the padded back of Reigns. Reigns sells it down the ramp, then grabs a chair, and just tosses it into the face of Sheamus. That was pretty cool. He grabs another, and hits Sheamus with it. Sheamus heads around the ring towards the announce table. Reigns follows. Sheamus with a gut punch, then whips him into the barricade. Sheamus removes the monitors from the commentary table. He goes for a powerbomb, but Reigns hits a Superman punch! He goes for a Spear! Sheamus steps aside! He sends Reigns over the table! Reigns is up! He spears Sheamus through a table!

End Show…….