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BG Says: PWG (Please Don’t Call It) The O.C.

February 22, 2008 | Posted by Brad Garoon
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BG Says: PWG (Please Don’t Call It) The O.C.  

(Please Don’t Call It) The O.C.

May 6, 2006 – La Habra Heights, California

Disco Machine and Commissioner Dino Winwood tackle commentary, and as usual be sure to switch the audio channel over to hear them.

Rocky RomeroVS. TJ Perkins
Rocky Romero VS. TJ Perkins
They lock up and right to the ropes. They trade leg kicks until Perkins puts on a half crab. Romero quickly counters to a lateral press for 1. Perkins puts on a wristlock and holds on through a bodyslam. Romero counters to a modified cloverleaf. Perkins escapes so Romero puts on a leglock. Perkins gets to the ropes. He puts on a cloverleaf and wrenches on Romero’s lower back. Romero comes back with leg kicks. Perkins counters a chinlock to a hammerlock. Romero hits a flying mare and puts on the bow and arrow. Perkins counters to the cross armbreaker but Romero quickly gets to the ropes. Romero gets a takedown for 1. Perkins blocks a takedown and hits a back heel kick. He hits a bodyslam and a kneedrop. Romero returns fire with a hard kick to the back. He keeps the pressure on with kick to the chest for 2. Perkins blocks a gutwrench suplex and hits a back suplex. He kicks Romero’s chest and back. Romero fires up and they trade slaps. Perkins kicks Romero to the mat. He hits the uranage suplex. He hits a brainbuster for 2. He hits a bodyslam but misses a slingshot senton. Romero puts on the octopus stretch. Perkins gets to the ropes. Romero kicks his gut and hits a knee kick for 2. He puts on the Gory Special but Perkins counters the hold. Romero puts on the anklelock but Perkins counters to a roll up for 2. Romero blocks a DDT but Perkins catches him with a pair of kicks and a roll up for 2. He sets Romero up top but Romero fights him off and hits a flying knee kick for 2. They trade kicks until Romero hits a German suplex for the win at 14:48. This was more of a throwback to Zero-One junior matches than it was your typical PWG opener, and I can’t tell you how much I appreciate that. Perkins really should only compete in this type of match, because it’s what he’s best at.
Rating: ***½

Austin AriesVS. Chris Sabin
Austin Aries VS. Chris Sabin
Aries was in Austin Starr mode here. They take turns taunting a fan to start. They trade holds as Winwood comments on the size of their thighs. Super gay. Aries kicks Sabin’s head to escape a hammerlock. Sabin chops him down while holding a wristlock. He gets a roll up for 2 and Aries retreats. The fans taunt Aries for his resemblance to the Macho Man. They knuckle up and Sabin hits an armdrag. He hits a running forearm in the corner. He blocks a blind charge and hits a head scissors takedown. He dropkicks the back of Aries’s head. Aries comes back with a neckbreaker over the second rope. Sabin falls to the floor so Aries follows him out with a double axe handle off the top rope. Back in the ring he hits a slingshot senton and an elbowdrop for 2. He hits a jumping back rake. He hits the Powerdrive Elbow to the back for 2. He hits a bodyslam and a kneedrop. He rewinds and hits it again in slow motion. In hindsight I can see why Jake Ziegler found that annoying. It gets 2. Aries hits a neckbreaker for 2. He hits a pancake and holds on with a facelock. He puts on a chinlock. Sabin fights out but Aries goes to the eyes. Sabin kicks his face. He hits a pair of clotheslines but Aries cuts his momentum off with a back elbow. Sabin hits the Tree of Woe dropkick for 2. He hits an enziguiri. He hits a running powerbomb for 2. The match comes to a close when both men block each other’s finishers and Aries rolls Sabin up with a fistful of tights at 15:40. I was expecting a lot more from these two. I was never into Slim Jim Aries so the fact that the character dominated this match did little for me.
Rating: **¾

Joey Ryan comes out and dubs himself the Hardcore Wizard because of his victory over the Necro Butcher. He reveals that an injury to Davey Richards will postpone the scheduled tag title defense. That fact got him wondering why the tag champs haven’t been stripped of the belts. So he looked at his own championship contract and discovered that he only has to defend the belt once ever sixty days. As such he will not defend the belt tonight, but will compete in a tag team contest. He brings out his new friend and tag team partner Scorpio Sky. These two apparently get along because they like each other for who they are. The homosexual overtones are not lost on the crowd. Sky busts out the Zoolander “brother” explanation and a big group huge breaks out. They call out Ryan’s number one contender B-Boy and tell him to get a partner. Frankie Kazarian predictably answers that call. Winwood comes out and gives the match his blessing.

B-BoyFrankie KazarianVS. Joey RyanScorpio Sky
B-Boy & Frankie Kazarian VS. Joey Ryan & Scorpio Sky
The heels don’t want to start with their respective rivals, so the match begins with Ryan and Kazarian. They trade takedowns to start. Kazarian gets distracted by Sky, allowing Ryan to attack him from behind. Kazarian and Sky fight on the floor. Kazarian tricks Ryan into hitting a baseball slide on Sky. Back in the ring he tricks Sky into nearly sodomizing Ryan. Sky and Ryan get back on the same page by embracing and staring at each other longingly. That allows their opponents to attack them from behind. They lift Sky up and shove his crotch into Ryan’s midsection. They hang Ryan in the Tree of Woe and drag Sky’s crotch into Ryan’s face. Ryan falls onto Sky in a suggestive position. Jade Chung distracts B-Boy so he chases her around the ring. Back inside B-Boy stays in control with a Manhattan drop on Sky. He knocks Ryan down and DDTs Sky into Ryan’s crotch. Kazarian tags in and hits a dropkick. He lifts Sky as if to deliver a vertical suplex but then sets him down and hits a clothesline for 2. Sky bails and Ryan attacks Kazarian from behind. Ryan tags in legally. He pokes Kazarian’s eyes. He hits a dropkick for 2. Sky tags in and boots Kazarian’s head. Chung chokes Kazarian with the referee distracted. Sky hits a dropkick for 2. He puts on a chinlock. Kazarian fights out so Sky hits a knee kick. Ryan tags in and rubs Kazarian’s face in his chest hair. Sky tags in and gets caught with the Sling Blade. Ryan and B-Boy tag into the match. Ryan tries to run away but B-Boy hits him with a back suplex. He catapults Sky over the top rope to the floor. He hits Ryan with a running forearm and a dropkick in the corner. Kazarian hits Ryan with the corner-to-corner dropkick for 2. B-Boy shoots Sky to the floor again. Kazarian hits Ryan with a springboard legdrop. B-Boy follows with a top rope legdrop for 2 when Sky saves. Kazarian hits a bicycle kick but Sky catches him with a neckbreaker. Sky hits B-Boy with a second rope hurricanrana for 2. Kazarian tags in and pummels Sky with clotheslines. He hits a leg lariat. He hits the Wave of the Future for 2 when Chung distracts the referee. Ryan hits Kazarian with a superkick for 2 when B-Boy hits him with a baseball slide. B-Boy tags himself in and hits a double stomp to the back of the head. He hits the Go2Sleep for 2 when Sky saves. On the floor B-Boy whips Sky into the post. Back inside Kazarian makes a blind tag and gets a sunset flip on Ryan. B-Boy follows that with the Shining Wizard (after no-selling a powerbomb he’d received three seconds prior), giving Kazarian the win at 18:13. If this match taught me one thing it’s that I need synonyms for the word crotch. The pacing down the stretch was strange, but the bulk of the match was consistent in both action and homosexual overtones.
Rating: ***

After the match Kazarian demands that Winwood grant him a title shot since he just pinned the champion. B-Boy grabs the microphone and reminds Kazairan that he’s the number one contender. Kazarian says he’ll give him a shot once he’s the champion, but just to make it clear he wants Winwood to declare a clear number one contender. As much as it pains him to say it because Kazarian has been bothering him lately he has to give him his due for pinning the champion. Therefore B-Boy is being bumped down a spot in favor of Kazarian. He’ll receive a title shot after Kazarian gets one. Ryan comes out from the back and lays B-Boy out with the title belt. Sky hits Kazarian from behind with a steel chair. Kazarian gets up so Sky lays him out with a shot to the face. He gets on the microphone and promises to do what Vince McMahon couldn’t… cut Kazarian’s hair. Chung pulls a pair of scissors from her boot and Sky cuts off Kazarian’s ponytail! He goes for more hair but Human Tornado makes the save.

Before his match with American Dragon, Steen expresses his disappointment in everyone for remembering Colt Cabana’s birthday but forgetting his. He won’t wrestle until American Dragon sings him happy birthday. Dragon starts to sing but then decides Steen doesn’t deserve it. He says if Steen wins the match he’ll sing to him, but if he loses he has to leave PWG forever. Steen accepts!

American DragonVS. Kevin Steen
American Dragon Bryan Danielson VS. Kevin Steen
Steen is overwhelmed by Dragon’s speed and intimidating aura early on. Dragon puts on a cross armbreaker but Steen quickly gets to the ropes. Dragon puts on a leglock and takes his time releasing when Steen gets to the ropes. Dragon destroys Steen’s arms, prompting him to bail. Back in the ring Steen stomps on Dragon’s foot and puts on a wristlock. Dragon counters to a dropkick. He dodges a dropkick and gets a roll up for 2. They knuckle up and Dragon hits a palm strike. Steen palms him in the corner. Dragon slaps Steen across the face. Steen bails again. Back in the ring they knuckle up again. Steen hits a monkey flip for 2. Danielson hits a monkey flip and puts on a triangle choke. Steen quickly gets to the ropes. Steen bails and exploits the 20-count. Back inside Danielson puts on the rear naked choke. Steen gets to the ropes. Danielson hits European uppercuts. Steen hits a crescent kick for 2. He chokes Dragon in the ropes. He tosses Dragon to the floor and they brawl to the bleachers. Dragon rams him into the wall and rolls him back into the ring. He hits a kneedrop for 2. He hits the thigh stomp. He hits a dragon screw and puts on a leglock. Steen returns fire with a back suplex for 2. He hits the somersault legdrop for 2. He goes to the eyes but Danielson comes back with chops and uppercuts. Danielson puts on a half crab but Steen gets to the ropes. He stands on Steen’s face, shouting that he can be a bad guy too. He hits a neck wrench suplex and climbs the ropes. The diving headbutt comes up short. Steen hits a clothesline and the cannonball in the corner for 2. He gets a roll up for 2. He hits the Code Breaker and climbs the ropes. A senton hits knees and Dragon puts on a chinlock. Steen gets to the ropes. Steen blocks the airplane spin and rolls Danielson up for 2. Danielson hits the roaring forearm and a dragon suplex for 2. He puts on the Cow Killer but Steen rolls through it for 2. Steen counters a diving European uppercut to a gutbuster. He hits the fisherman neckbreaker for 2. He climbs the ropes but Danielson crotches him and hits a back superplex for 2. He puts on the Cow Killer but Steen counters the hold (though he’s too fat to bridge). Danielson easily escapes and hits a tiger suplex for the win at 23:07. I was expecting a lot going into this and was disappointed. It wasn’t bad but there wasn’t a cohesive enough story to keep me entertained for twenty three minutes.
Rating: **¾

Dino Winwood comes out after the match to talk about whether or not Steen is really going to have to leave PWG forever. He leaves the decision up to Danielson, but reminds him that tomorrow is indeed Steen’s birthday. Steen pleads with him, saying that after PWG all he has left is CZW, and that’s a sad existence. Danielson asks the crowd and they demand that he stay. Danielson says that his own birthday is in a couple weeks, so Steen can stay if he sings to him while doing the Booty Dance. Steen chooses the Booty Dance over CZW, but asks that Chris Sabin come out to teach him how. Sabin had already left so it’s up to Dino to teach him the dance. The ensuing spectacle is much more entertaining than the preceding match. Steen throws in the Worm for good measure.

Super DragonRoninAlex KoslovVS.
Disco MachineNemesisBino Gambino
Super Dragon, Ronin & Alex Koslov VS. Disco Machine, Nemesis & Bino Gambino
Dragon certainly looks out of place here. He’s in this match because of Davey Richards’s injury. Disco and Ronin start. Ronin puts Disco on the mat and kicks his back while holding a wristlock. Disco hits a head scissors takedown and a dropkick. Gambino and Koslov tag in to the match. Gambino wants to test himself against Dragon. Koslov and Dragon oblige him. Gambino gets a takedown and tries to stay on top on Dragon on the mat. Dragon goes to the eyes. Gambino blocks a blind charge and hits a head scissors takedown. Dragon hits a back elbow and tags to Koslov. Gambino hits an armdrag and tags to Nemesis. Koslov keeps Nemesis on the mat with an armbar. They fight over the hold until Nemesis hits a tilt-a-whirl backbreaker. Dragon tags in and shoves Nemesis down. Nemesis hits an armdrag and puts on a headlock. Disco tags in and hits a basement dropkick. Nemesis and Gambino also hits dropkicks. Dragon bails and slugs Disco when he goes for a dive. He catapults Disco into the bottom of the bleachers. Koslov tags in and hits an elbowdrop back in the ring. Ronin tags in and chops Disco in the corner. Dragon tags in and hits a vertical suplex for 2. Koslov tags in and hits a vertical suplex. He hits a kneedrop for 2. Ronin tags in and hits a forearm. He hits a back suplex for 2. Dragon tags in and stands on Disco’s crotch while he’s in the Tree of Woe. He hits a ToW dropkick. He hits a kneedrop and climbs the ropes. Disco knocks him to the mat and tags to Gambino. Gambino takes Ronin out with a clothesline and a dropkick. Dragon keeps Nemesis and Gambino from double-teaming Ronin. Koslov tags in and puts on a chinlock. He puts on a Mexican surfboard in the ropes, allowing Dragon & Ronin to chop him. Dragon & Ronin sandwich Gambino’s face with dropkicks, getting 2 for Koslov. Ronin tags in and hits a forearm in the corner. Dragon tags in and hits the Burning Sword. He puts on the Mark Nulty Special but Gambino gets to the ropes. He holds Gambino up for the Curb Stomp and lets Koslov hit his Russian dance kicks before completing the move. It gets 2. Gambino comes back with the Stroke. Koslov and Disco tag into the match. Disco hits a back bodydrop. He hits a dropkick. Nemesis & Disco hit stereo dropkicks on Ronin & Koslov. The entire babyface team hits the entire heel team with suicide dives. Back in the ring Disco hits Koslov with a pair of snap suplexes and a facebuster for 2. Nemesis tags in and hits a neckbreaker for 2. Gambino tags in and walks into an eye poke. Ronin tags in and hits the elevated forearm. He hits a twisting suplex and tags to Dragon. Dragon comes off the top with dropkicks to Disco & Nemesis while hitting a senton on Gambino for 2. Koslov hits Gambino with the Russian legsweep into a crossface. Nemesis breaks it up. Dragon tags in and walks into a stunner. Gambino hits an enziguiri for 2. Nemesis tags in and hits the Death Penalty for 2 when Koslov saves. Disco tags in and gets caught with a Blue Thunder Bomb. That gets 2 for Dragon. Ronin tags in and gets hit with the Chokebreaker. That only gets 2 for Disco. Gambino tags in and gets hit with a powerbomb. That gets 2 when Disco saves. Koslov dives onto Nemesis & Disco on the floor. In the ring Dragon & Ronin beat Gambino to the mat. They hold him upside down and kick him to mulch. Ronin hits the DVD and Dragon follows with a top rope double stomp to the back of the head for the win at 27:09. The heel teamed gelled exceptionally well here. The match didn’t need to go as long as it did, so while it was never boring it failed to keep the crowd engaged.
Rating: ***

Human TornadoVS. Colt Cabana
Human Tornado VS. Colt Cabana
Tornado is worried about the referee’s pre-match handshake with Cabana. Cabana overpowers Tornado to start. He works over Tornado’s arm. They go for dropkicks at the same time. Tornado kips up but Cabana has trouble doing the same. He asks Tornado to help him and then betrays Tornado by hitting an armdrag. Tornado bails so Cabana follows him out with a dropkick. He goes for a moonsault but Tornado runs back into the ring and hits the Pimp Slap. Cabana thought she was free since it was his birthday. It’s never really free Cabana. Cabana puts on a headlock. He gets a roll up for 2. The referee forcibly lifts Cabana up when he won’t release Tornado from the pin situation. If this wasn’t a comedy match then that would have bothered me. They knuckle up and Cabana easily overpowers Tornado. Tornado dances his way out of the knuckle lock. He trips Cabana and hits a pair of armdrags and a dropkick. He hits the House Party. He hits a butt splash. Cabana blocks the New Jack Swing. They fight over a catapult in what looked like a GREAT cover for a botched spot. Cabana hits a headbutt to the groin; a big mistake against Tornado. He hangs Tornado over the middle rope and punts his back repeatedly. He hits the Flying Asshole to Tornado in that position for 2. Tornado hurricanranas Cabana over the top rope to the floor. He hits the Wall Dive and lands on a ton of chairs himself. Back in the ring they trade chops. Tornado hits a neckbreaker for 2. Cabana blocks DND and a tornado DDT. He can’t block a roll up and Tornado gets the win at 11:33. The match went for comedy and succeeded in that endeavor. Outside of that it wasn’t much.
Rating: **½

Scott LostChris BoshChris HeroClaudio CastagnoliVS.
Super DragonKevin SteenEl GenericoQuicksilver
Scott Lost, Chris Bosh, Chris Hero & Claudio Castagnoli VS. Super Dragon, Kevin Steen, El Generico & Quicksilver
Los Luchas were supposed to team with Cape Fear in this match but they didn’t come to the show. No specific reason is given as to why mortal enemies Steen and Dragon were put into their place. For my own piece of mind I’m going to say that Steen was just grateful to still have a job with PWG and Dragon was probably feeling good after his win earlier in the evening. Lost tries to attack Quicksilver before the bell but Quicksilver avoids him. Quicksilver hits a standing moonsault for 2. He hits a head scissors takedown. Hero tags in as Quicksilver hits a leg lariat on Lost. Hero hits Quicksilver with a slam. He chops him down and then hits a forearm. Quicksilver hits a pair of armdrags. He hits a head scissors takedown. He gets a roll up for 2. Generico tags in and puts on a wristlock. Hero hits a forearm and tags to Castagnoli. Castagnoli hits a European uppercut. Generico hits a dropkick. Bosh tags in and runs into a chop. Generico hits an armdrag and a leg lariat. They trade armdrags. Generico hits an elbowdrop for 2. He grabs a wristlock and then walks the ropes. He kicks down Bosh’s teammates and then brings him to his own corner for his own teammates to chop Bosh. Finally he dives off the ropes and armdrags Bosh to the floor. Lost hits Generico with a gutbuster. The Kings swing Bosh into Generico and then slam him into the Earthquake drop for 2. Lost tags in legally and hits a vertical suplex for 2. Generico hits a back suplex and tags to Steen. Lost hits him with a leg lariat. Steen comes back with a powerslam for 2. Bosh tags in and they slug it out. The crowd chants their names with each punch. Steen puts on the Gory Special and swings Bosh into a backbreaker. He hits a senton for 2. After a tense stare-down Steen tags to Dragon. Dragon & Steen take turns holding Bosh for the other to slap him. Dragon hits a back suplex for 2. He sets Bosh up top and then catches him coming down with a low blow. Quicksilver tags in but gets caught in a Kings of Wrestling double-team. It gets 2, though I don’t think Castagnoli was actually legal. Hero tags in and flings Castagnoli into Quicksilver in the corner. Hero slams Quicksilver and hits a senton for 2. Lost tags in and hits a dropkick for 2. He hits the Superman Spear. Castagnoli tags in and holds Quicksilver up as if to hit a delayed vertical suplex. Instead he throws Quicksilver at Dragon.

Things break down, and it couldn’t have happened at a better time because the match was starting to really suck. The Kings and Arrogance hit a four-sided dropkick attack on Quicksilver. They pile on Dragon while keeping his teammates at bay. Hero puts Quicksilver in a chinlock. Castagnoli tags in and hits an elbowdrop. Bosh tags in and fistdrops a paper cup into Quicksilver’s face. Hero tags in and slaps Quicksilver to the mat. Castagnoli comes in but Quicksilver fights off the Kings and tags to Generico. Generico hits Castagnoli with a missile dropkick. He hits Bosh with a swinging DDT. Steen hits Lost with a powerbomb, getting 2 for Generico. Hero drops Generico into a European uppercut from Castagnoli. The Kings fling Bosh onto Steen on the floor. They go to the floor for no reason, opening them up for stereo dives from Dragon & Quicksilver. Steen climbs the ropes and hits a somersault dive onto everyone. Generico hits a springboard moonsault onto everyone. Back in the ring Lost hits a superkick and the Ace Crusher on Dragon. He puts on the Sharpshooter but Generico pulls him away and hits the Half & Half for 2. Bosh hits Generico with a stunner and a backbreaker for 2. Quicksilver hits Bosh with a piledriver for 2. Castagnoli hits Quicksilver with a European uppercut. He hits a climbing enziguiri and then drives Quicksilver to the mat with his knee for 2. He trades shots with Dragon. Dragon catches him with a backslide for 2. He hits a roaring forearm and climbs the ropes. He hits the double stomp to the back of the head. Steen climbs the ropes and hits a 450 splash for 2. Hero sets Steen up top and pulls him down with the Cravat Breaker for 2. Generico sets Hero up top but Hero fights him off. Bosh hits Generico with a neckbreaker and the Screwdriver for the win at 25:20. This was one of the most disjointed and sloppy main event I’ve seen to date in PWG. These guys should all be ashamed. It didn’t seem like anyone cared to be in there, and I hope that’s the case because otherwise it was a really off night for everyone.
Rating: **

Highlighting the BONUS button on the main menu will reveal the following backstage shenanigans
Quicksilver pops up behind Kevin Steen. He and Generico, wearing matching black briefs, thank Steen and offer him a lap dance from Generico. Steen gives them credit for being a good tag team, but says that he and a red cup that was thrown into the ring during the main event are going to win the tag titles together. Quicksilver thinks that’s stupid and Steen eventually agrees. Just creepy stuff from everyone involved there.

Colt Cabana cuts a promo. He fakes his own audio issues. The trick would have worked better if you couldn’t hear the people in the background talking, but I guess it’s still kind of clever.

The 411BG Says

Main event aside this was a very solid show. Everything aside from the main event hovered around ***. The opener was really fun and very different from everything else. The main event failed to deliver completely. What a bomb. That said aside from the opener nothing here is interesting enough to go out of your way for, and that match won’t be for everyone.

Make sure to check out The Cool Kids' Table as well as my archive.

 
Final Score:  6.5   [ Average ]  legend

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