Ring Crew Reviews: WWE Survivor Series 2000

• Due to the outstanding response to my previous rundown of the Royal Rumbles from 2000 to 2011 and my favorite Summerslam matches, I decided to do another Big 4 specialty. This time it’s all the Survivor Series from 2000 to 2010. They’ll go up one a day with the final one being posted on the day of Survivor Series 2011, Sunday, November 20th. Hope you enjoy.

• Scheduled Card:
1. Six Person Intergender Tag Match: T&A vs. Crash Holly, Molly Holly and Steve Blackman.
2. Traditional Survivor Series Match: Road Dogg, K-Kwik, Chyna, and Billy Gunn vs. The Radicalz.
3. Chris Jericho vs. Kane.
4. WWF European Championship: Bob Holly vs. William Regal (c).
5. Rikishi vs. The Rock.
6. WWF Women’s Championship: Lita vs. Ivory (c).
7. WWF Championship: The Undertaker vs. Kurt Angle (c).
8. Traditional Survivor Series Match: Edge & Christian & Right to Censor vs. The Dudleyz and The Hardyz.
9. No DQ Match: Triple H vs. Stone Cold.

• Video package focuses on how Triple H was secretly pulling the strings behind Austin’s rundown (because he hired Rikishi because he wanted to do it for the Rock who wanted to do it for the people but none of this is mentioned). This is actually more similar to a TNA vignette than a traditional WWE one but it’s still good.

• Six Person Intergender Tag Match: T&A vs. Crash Holly, Molly Holly and Steve Blackman. TnA are wearing APA shirts for whatever reason. Albert pounds Blackman to start. Blackman avoids a clothesline and a charge in the corner and gets a sweep. Crash tries a crossbody but Albert no sells so Blackman dropkicks him into the cover for 2. Albert takes him down and then takes in Trish, Trish tries a punt low blow but Crash is raised up and Albert eats it instead. Crash trips Trish down and tags in Molly but Trish runs her around and tags in Test instead. Crash back in and avoids a charge in the corner and gets a rana for 2 but runs into a big boot. Test with rights and tags in Albert and they hit a double flapjack. King: “I better not make any short jokes about Crash or he’ll come over here and punch me in the ankle.” JR: “What are you waiting on? A short arm scissors?” Test wants the Meltdown but Crash slides out and the heels collide but still manage to take down Crash. Test tags in Trish who whiffs on an elbow. Molly back in with a hiptoss on Trish and a bodyslam to some pops. More elbows and chops. Trish reverses a whip and Test pulls down Molly by the hair to MASSIVE heel heat. Molly counters a suplex with one of her own. Molly tags in Blackman but Teddy Long didn’t see it so Molly is dragged over to the heel corner for some damage. Albert tries to press slam her but the faces barnstorm in and break that up. The men brawl to the floor and Trish chokes from the top rope and hits an ugly bulldog off the top for 2. Molly comes back with a sunset flip off the top for the 3 to win it at 5:05. Hot match if inconsequential on about every level imaginable. **1/4

• Meanwhile, Edge and Christian totally reeking of awesomeness are hanging out in the back when Kurt Angle interrupts. E&C say they can’t help Angle out tonight with UT because Christian is feeling a bit sick. Angle says it’s all good because he owns UT anyway and just wants to know if they want to go out to celebrate later to drink Molsens. They have that in a non-alcoholic, right?

• Earlier today, Tiger Ali Singh was left off the list to get in the building and the guy with the clipboard wants to see their credentials.

• Traditional Survivor Series Match: Road Dogg, K-Kwik, Chyna, and Billy Gunn vs. The Radicalz. Hopefully everyone knows that K-Kwik is R-Truth and here he’s still singing his entrance song. Billy is coming off rotator cuff surgery and is “The One” at this point. Radicalz are Benoit, Malenko, Eddie and Saturn who has Terri Runnels with him. Saturn and Billy to start. JR provides some backstory that sounds funny as hell but I have no idea what he’s talking about: “Latino Heat made some disparaging remarks on MTV’s Sunday Night Heat about Lillian Garcia that were somewhat distasteful.” Saturn with an eyepoke and tells Tim White to SHUTUP. Billy gets the foot up and a clothesline. Chyna in and they hit a double suplex. Chyna ducks a clothesline and hits some rights and a powerslam for 2. Chyna with a flapjack and the handspring back elbow but Saturn blocks so she gives him a low blow and decks Eddie, “her former fiance” on the apron. She hits a DDT but Malenko breaks up the cover and the match breaks down. Eddie waffles Chyna from behind with the belt and she’s gone at 2:33. Road Dogg now with some rights but Saturn cuts him off with a back suplex and Eddie in with the slingshot senton and he tells the crowd to kiss his ass to MAJOR heat. EDDIE SUCKS! EDDIE SUCKS! Road Dogg tries the jabs but Eddie with a basement dropkick and works the leg and brings in Malenko who has a PhD in leg psychology. Eddie back in with another senton on the leg. Eddie heads up top and tells the crowd to shove it but RD cuts him off with jabs and a top rope suplex. He makes the tag to Billy but he whiffs on a Stinger Splash and the Radicalz work him over. He escapes and pounds his way free to a pop. He hits a press slam and a sleeper neckbreaker on Eddie and he’s out at 6:02. He tries another press slam but Saturn clips the leg and now Malenko goes to work. Truth in and flips out of a hip toss but eats a shoulderblock. They have some nifty counters until they botch a Downward Spiral. Malenko’s Malenko and Truth’s Truth so I’m blaming Truth. Benoit in but Truth avoids his stuff and hits a leg lariat and a flying headscissors and Japanese arm drag. Benoit however ducks another and hits a bridged German suplex and Truth is out at 7:21. Road Dogg in but he gets shoved into the heel corner as well. They hit a double back elbow and Saturn drops an elbow for 2. JR talks about how only the artists formerly known as the NAO are left and then calls them “quite possibly the greatest tag team ever in the WWF.” Anyway he takes down Saturn with some rights and tries a clothesline but eats a Northern Lights suplex and he’s done at 8:50. Billy Gunn is literally The One now. He tries a head of steam but eats a shot from behind on the apron and the numbers game looks like it’s going to be too much. Malenko works him over and taunts so Saturn can Stun Gun him from behind. Benoit lowers the bridge on another whip and dumps him. Saturn tries a superkick but Billy moves and Benoit eats it. Malenko gives him a basement dropkick. Back in though, Billy hits the Fameasser and Malenko’s history at 11:00. Saturn boots him immediately. Billy counters a backdrop with an ugly Jackhammer but Benoit breaks up the cover. Benoit slams him down and heads up top and hits the Falling Headbutt but Billy kicks out at 2. Everyone else has to job to transition moves but Billy gets a false finish to up his cred. After the heel miscommunication, Billy tries to suplex Benoit back in but Saturn trips him up and holds down his foot behind the ref’s back to revert Billy back to zero status at 12:41. Dreadful finish to a solid match but did we seriously need to protect Billy Gunn that much especially when the Radicalz were looking like a well oiled, competent, legitimate and let’s just say FAR SUPERIOR team until that point? **3/4

• Backstage, Rock arrives and blows past Lillian Garcia without discussing his match against Rikishi.

• Instead, we cut to Chris Jericho and “Mitchell” Cole. This is the infamous feud between Jericho and Kane over spilled coffee. Jericho says he was hoping for a Sanka on a Pole match so the winner could spill as much as he wanted. Jericho says this match is not about coffee, it’s about a burning anger inside of a monster waiting to be let out and of course he’s talking about… HIMSELF! CHRIS JERICHO! Strong promo by Jericho as he actually made me care just a tad more.

• Chris Jericho vs. Kane. Jericho ducks a few shots and hits some but Kane cuts him off with a knee. Y2J chant from the crowd as Kane hits some rights in the corner. Doane tries calling Kane off but he scares him away. Jericho with an up and over to charge a charge and he dropkicks Kane over to the top and to the floor. Jericho with a baseball slide dropkick as well. Jericho tries a plancha but botches it in getting caught in the top rope and almost kills himself but luckily Kane is there to catch him. More brawling on the floor as JR says that Kane is “like a giant redwood tree.” Kane sends him into the stairs. Back in, Jericho with a Stun Gun and a springboard dropkick and Kane lightly stumbles to the floor. Jericho uses the top half of the stairs and then kicks them into Kane which sounds cooler than it is. Jericho tries a crossbody but Kane catches him and hits a powerslam for 2. Jericho avoids a backdrop with some boots but runs into a flapjack. Kane sloppily boots him around and chokes in the corner and then talks on camera to set up Jericho flipping out of a back suplex. Kane takes him back down with a right. Kane grabs him by the face to put him in a pseudo Gory Special. Kane then drives him back into the corner and hits more sloppy strikes. Kane tries taking the turnbuckle pad off and does it. He and Jericho fight over who will go into it. Kane hits a a series of rights and Jericho awkwardly refuses to go down by holding on to Kane’s singlet so Kane tosses him. This has no heat at all. Kane sends him into the barricade on the floor and then almost botches press slamming him back into the ring. Kane heads up top but Jericho crotches him. Kane recovers and tries a flying nothing only to eat a dropkick. Kane tries a big boot but Jericho trips him up and hits another dropkick and a missile dropkick for 2. Jericho tries a crossbody but Kane catches him. Jericho slides out and school boys him for 2 and Jericho rolls him into the WoJ. Kane just lays there and rests on his forearms before grabbing the ropes. Jericho refuses to release the hold and instead pulls him back to the middle. Kane pulls his way free but Jericho tries putting the hold back on. Kane kicks him free and again the timing is just awful. Jericho with a bulldog and a Lionsault but Kane no sells and catches him in the goozle. Kane with the ChokeSlam for the 3 to win it at 13:35. Shit match. Never EVER pair these two up again as they have zero chemistry together and it’s the worst kind of style clash. *

• Meanwhile, Terri Runnels says she’s met with Triple H and then he’ll met up with the Radicalz later. CUE THE EVIL LAUGH!

• WWF European Championship: Bob Holly vs. William Regal (c ). Regal gets the stick. JR: “I guess we’ll have an ‘ortation.’” That’d be oration if you speak English. Regal makes fun of the whole country over the electoral college fiasco with Bush/Gore. JR: “What do you know about elections?” Nice of JR to get his heat back. Holly interrupts before Regal can say much. JR says Holly’s coming off a legit broken arm courtesy of Kurt Angle but neglects to mention it was his moonsault. King endorses eugenics as he says Holly is not of qualified stock to be the ubermensch: “If anyone could use a little ‘better breeding’ so to speak, it’d be Bob Holly.” Holly hits rights to start but Regal comes back with Euro uppercuts. Holly gets a shoulderblock for 1 but Regal with the takedown and some chain stuff for a 1 count. They exchange armdrags an do the stalemate standoff to crickets. Rather than give a clean break, Holly hits some rights in the corner. He tries a charge but runs into a boot. Regal shoves him into the ringpost and wraps the arm around it. Holly: “AHHHHHHHHH SHIT!” Regal drops a few knees on the arm and torques it. Holly tries a suplex before Regal counters with a hammerlock takedown to stay on the arm but the crowd couldn’t care less. Regal comes down on the arm again and gets the royal wave to boos. Regal goes to the armbar. King: “I get along with my mother-in-law.” JR: “Which one?” The crowd has been randomly trying chants that are dying quickly and I can’t make any of them out. At least, Regal is bringing the goods on the obvious arm psychology to a guy coming off surgery. Regal with an Americana but Holly ignores and gets a crossbody for 2. Holly at least sells the arm on impact. After some more counters, Holly tries a German but Regal gets the low blow behind the ref’s back. Crowd is bored to tears. Regal ties him up in the ropes but Holly gets free and hits a clothesline and shitcans Regal. Holly sends him into the stairs and gets the Euro belt and waffles Regal for the DQ at 5:50. Yeah, whatever. Not exactly the auspicious return to action for Sparky Plug after 5 months off. *1/4

• Meanwhile, Trish approachs Kurt in the back. Did she know this is the start of year 2 of Angle’s WWF’s legacy? Trish says that she notices that Steph isn’t here and wants to know if Angle could handle some “special assistance.” Angle says thanks, but no thanks and Trish can tell Test and Albert he doesn’t swing that way.

• Rikishi vs. The Rock. See, Rikishi and Rock were tight, except not really, but anyway Rikishi said it was Rock’s idea for him to take out Stone Cold and Rock took that kind of accusation personal. The build up to this involved Triple H and Rikishi running down Rock with a Lincoln Continental, Rikishi starting to wear white FUBU suits, and Rikishi giving him the Bonzai Drop so Rock is selling bruised ribs here. Rikishi’s heel music sounds like the Nation’s old theme. Rock comes running out from the back with rights and a backdrop. Rock gets a chair and brings it in but Tim White pulls it away. That’s enough distraction for Rikishi to cut him off with a superkick. Crowd chants huge for Rock already. Rikishi with a back elbow and an Atomic Legdrop. JR: “Rikishi and Rock grew up in a family… a HUGE EXTENDED FAMILY! . . This is a CIVIL WAR!” Oh the HORROR! They could have met at barbecues and reunions! Rikishi with some right hands in the corner and Rock is selling the hell out of this. Rock comes back but walks into a side slam for 2. Rikishi stalks around with more boots and then talks on camera so Rock can shitcan him and send him into the stairs. Rikishi sends Rock into the stairs and then the barricade. Rock tries countering but they bump the ref with another shot into the barricade. Rikishi finds Triple H’s sledge under the ring and bangs it on the ringpost to prove it’s real. Rock avoids the sledge with a right hand and a Rock Bottom. Rock’s out of it but a delayed cover gets 2 as the ref recovers. Tim White finds the sledge and disposes of it. Rock with more rights but Rikishi goes back to the gut with a headbutt and another. Rock tries more right but runs into a Samoan drop and the standing Bonzai for 2. ROCKY! ROCKY! Rikishi hits the Runaway Samoan Semi and the Stinkface. Rock no sells the stench and hits a running clothesline. Double KO spot. Rikishi recovers and goes for a superkick but Rock ducks and gives him a spinebuster. Rock hits the People’s Elbow and Rikishi sells it by doing the Movin’ like Bernie. Rock sells the ribs and the delayed cover still gets 3 at 11:20. Punch, kick, comeback, rib shot, punch, comeback, rib shot, comeback, ref bump, comeback, rib shot, no sell, victory. Decent mainly due to Rock’s selling and general aura but nothing worth watching. **

• Post-match, Rikishi gives him a few Bonzai Drops just because he’s not leaving a main event level feud without kicking and screaming.

• Triple H is hanging out with the Radicalz in the back. Foley busts in and says that the Radicalz are banned from ringside but Triple H is fine with it, so Foley makes the match with Austin No-DQ. Still no reaction from Trips so Foley leaves.

• WWF Women’s Championship: Lita vs. Ivory (c). Ivory is in Right to Censor which has some seriously underrated music. Lita overpowers with some hairmares to start. Cue the Lita chant as she gets a hiptoss and an ugly go behind that goes nowhere. She runs a few back and forths before hitting an enzuigiri. Ivory hits a couple of right hands and potatoes her. Lita gets a cut above the eye hard way. They redo the go behind spot so Ivory can block an ugly O’Connor roll. Lita takes her down with a clothesline for 2. Ivory boots in the corner and chokes her chest. Ivory with a leg drop and elbow drop for 2. King: “I bet ya the one thing Ivory’s good for she’s not good at.” JR: “What do you mean, cooking?” King: “Not exactly.” JR: “WWF cookbook fix her right up.” Ivory with more shots and a suplex for 2 as JR suggests they stop the match. Lita comes back with a headscissors and a standing rana for 2. Stevie Richards comes out to boos and Lita dumps Ivory to the fall and then hits a crossbody on both of them. Back in, Lita with another crossbody for 2. Lita heads up and tries a moonsault but Stevie pulls Ivory out of the way. Ivory gets the belt as Stevie distracts the ref. Lita ducks a waffle attempt and hits a back suplex. Lita takes off her shirt to arguably the biggest pop of the night for her cleavage. She goes for the moonsault but Ivory gets the belt up and Lita eats it. Ivory drapes the arm to retain at 4:53. JR: “A backdoor victory for Ivory!” 1/2* for Lita’s hardway gash. There have been some real crap finishes tonight.

• Meanwhile, The Coach is hanging out outside of Rock’s dressing room for updates on his condition,

• Next, Kane is walking and Jericho jumps him with a chairshot across the back and then dumps Kane into a garage door and some steel pipes.

• WWF Championship: The Undertaker vs. Kurt Angle (c). JR mentions that for the last 6 years the WWF strap has changed hands. For those of you uninitiated, in his first year, Angle won the Euro belt, IC belt, King of the Ring, and the WWF title. Taker’s justification for why he got the title shot in the video package: “Although I don’t dress like Satan anymore, I’m still down with the devil and will go medieval on your ass.” Also: “You’re standing in my yard and I’m the big dog that runs that yard.” Angle starting attacking UT with a chair and Jerry played up his mean streak. Every single champ has come out first for what it’s worth. Kurt gets the stick and to commemorate his first year in the WWF he wants a moment of silence for everyone to remember their favorite Kurt Angle win. Before Kurt can get into describing his Euro title victory, BikerTaker interrupts. REV THE BIKES, TONY! JR plays up this being UT’s 10 years in the fed and 9 years since winning his first world title at SS. UT’s entrance scares Angle out of the ring and then UT takes the belt to pose with it. If Angle’s going over, at least UT will let everybody know who the real star is. Angle stays on the outside to regroup. JR: “Angle doing a good deal of stalling.” King: “WAIT A MINUTE! The word is ‘psychology,’ not stalling.” JR: “Well, he’s not got in the ring yet; the match has not started” King: “The match hasn’t started yet. Why would he get in the ring? That’s not stalling.” JR: “Well, what do you want him to do? Get a burger? How about ribs?” Their exchanges use to be so money. UT slides out to get a chair and Angle finally gets in the ring but hides behind Hebner, but it turns out UT got the chair to give it to Angle. Angle waffles him with the chair on the back while UT takes off his coat and THEN the bell rings.

• Angle with rights in the corner and pounds UT down and then stomps a mudhole. UT no sells and throws Angle into the corner for some rights and then hits a big boot and leg drop for 2 but he pulls Angle up. UT with a slam and an elbow and AGAIN pulls Angle up. Alright, enough of this crap. UT does Old School. He sends Angle off who takes a breather to boos. Angle does the heel runaround as Taker gives chase only to eat some shots back in. Angle finally ducks a shot and hits a German suplex for 2. Angle clotheslines him over the top and tries an ax handle but UT catches him. Angle: “OH MY GOD!” UT rides him into the ringpost and does it again. Hebner’s a bystander in all this. King: “What about the latitude allowed by this Hebnerized Earl Hebner?” Back in, more lowerback shots from Taker. Taker tries a big boot in the corner but gets hung up so Angle goes after the leg and wraps it around the ropes. UT fights back with rights and Angle brings him into the corner for more punches and kicks and talks pretty loud on camera. Angle runs out of the corner only to get caught in a fucking Fujiwara armbar takedown by UT. That’s right, an Olympic gold medalist is technically outwrestled by a biker from Texas. Anyway, Edge and Christian come out to distract Hebner. Angle taps behind the ref’s back to further bury him. UT releases the hold only to get Stun Gunned by Christian. UT of course no sells that and goozles Angle until he boots the leg a couple times. Angle with a single leg and targets the leg some more. Big Angle sucks chant as he hits a clothesline on a seated UT for 2. Angle bridges into a cover for 2 and then goes back to the leg grapevine. Angle’s leg work here is leaving a lot to be desired. UT uses the good leg to boot his way free. He does the Zombie powder out to beat Edge and Christian up the aisle. Earl ejects them but leaves the ring. UT gets Kurt with the ChokeSlam and covers but of course no ref. Delayed cover gets 2. JR: “NOOOO! DAMN! Undertaker’s had the match won twice!” Try four times including the pull ups on the cover at the beginning. Angle school boys him for 2 only to get taken down by another clothesline. UT with a Russian legsweep for another 2. Angle rolls to the floor and rams UT’s leg into the apron a few times. Angle puts on the Figure Four. WOOO! Fans chant that Angle sucks. UT reverses the hold and Angle barely makes the ropes. UT hits a Bulldog powerslam for 2. Angle slides out of another and trips UT and drops more elbows on the leg and then brings him over for the RING POST FIGURE FOUR! That’s always good for a 1/2*. Back in, UT flapjacks him into the top turnbuckle for 2. Earl’s about to see a low blow so UT shoves him away and then Angle with the BLATANTLOWBLOW! UT counters to a Tombstone attempt but Angle reverses to get back to the apron only for UT to knock him down. Kurt crawls under the ring but UT pulls him (or someone related to him, in this case Eric Angle) back out. UT hits the Last Ride and Earl counts to 2 but then stops and tries UT something is rotten in the state of Florida. The real Kurt crawls back in the ring and school boys UT with a handful of tights to retain at 16:04.

• Could a match do any less for a world champion than this one did? There are some recent contenders for futility in making your world champ look competent as well (Swagger-Show to name one) but this is the worst I can remember off the top of my head. I could even go along with the rest of the match if UT hadn’t no sold a chairshot and pulled up Angle TWICE at the beginning to completely cut the legs off of the match before it even got a chance. Angle still wasn’t there yet and would greatly vary his offense over the next few years, but this did him no favors. If this didn’t have a watchable second half, it’s probably in the DUD range. *3/4

• Traditional Survivor Series Match: Edge & Christian & Right to Censor vs. The Dudleyz and The Hardyz. Bling Bling Buchanan and Goodfather are representing RTC and are tag champs. Bubba and B2 to start. Crowd wants tables already. Bull pounds away in the corner but Bubba gets the boot up and clotheslines him down for 2. Devon in with a back elbow and a flying shoulderblock for 2. B2 comes back with a big boot and tags in Goodfather who also gets a boot. Goodfather with a shoulerblock to crickets and then chokes. Christian tagged in and sends Devon into the turnbuckle. He tries a charge but runs into a boot. He comes back with a Paroxysm but it’s double KO. Edge and Matt in. Matt with a Side Effect and then knocks down all the face. Matt with a sleeper neckbreaker for 2. The match breaks down as the Hardyz and Dudleyz hit quadruple DDTs on the heels. The Dudleyz go for the tables as the Hardyz hit Poetry in Motion. Matt wants the yodelling leg drop but Val knocks him off and Edge hits the Edge-o-matic and Matt is gone at 4:01. Jeff in and jumps Edge and then quickly tags in Devon. Edge flips out of a double suplex but eats a neckbreaker from Devon. Devon with a clothesline for 2. Christian and the heels almost collid so Devon can hit another clothesline. Bling Bling hits him from behind and that allows Christian to hit the Unprettier and he’s gone at 5:10. Bubba in with a backdrop and tags in Jeff. Jeff with a NICE double jump Arabian press for 2. Christian comes back with a boot and then throws Jeff into the ringpost. The crowd still wants tables as Bull hits a press slam. Bull with more right hands but whiffs on a Stinger Splash. Bubba in with some clotheslines and then gives a side slam to Goodfather and has backdrops for the rest of the heels. Bubba slides out of the way and Edge accidentally Spears Bull and he’s gone at 7:32. Bubba hits the BubbaBomb on Edge and Christian tries a splash but Bubba moves and Edge eats it in an horribly contrived spot. Bubba covers and Edge is gone at 8:00. Goodfather tosses Jeff but Bubba manages to fight off both heels temporarily but Goodfather hits a DVD and Bubba’s gone at 8:41. Jeff goes after both only to get whipped into a big boot from Goodfather. Jeff gets whipped into Goodfather and knocks him off the apron. Jeff avoids a charge and throws Christian into the ringpost. Jeff heads up top and hits the Swanton and Christian is out at 9:40. Goodfather wants the Ho Train but Jeff avoids. Goodfather and Val Venis collide on the apron and Jeff covers for the win at 10:05. About like the opener, fun and the crowd was into it but meaningless once it’s over. **

• Post-match, the RTC is put through tables.

• Meanwhile, Austin is walking and Triple H meets secretly with the Radicalz again.

• No DQ Match: Triple H vs. Stone Cold. Triple H’s music is some remix that’s between his “My Time” theme and “The Game” music, although it’s VERY close to the “My Time” theme and is basically just a heavier version. Austin is using the Disturbed music. They slug it out to start and Austin wins that one. Austin with a back elbow and sends H into the turnbuckle. A few more turnbuckle smashes and now JR unveils Austin’s diabolical plan that he teased on Heat. Austin will outwrestle Triple H and pin him with the Stunner in the middle of the ring. King’s not buying that fairy tale and expects it’s more sinister than that. Trips cuts him off with a thumb to the eye and now sends Austin into the turnbuckles but Austin comes back with a knee. Austin targets the lower back with knees and forearms. H cuts him off with a jawbreaker but Austin gets the Thesz press and an elbow drop. H rolls to the floor and Austin follows and sends him into the barricade up the aisle. More brawling and Austin grabs a metal stand but H rams it back into his face and now sends Austin into the barricade. H stays on the offense and brings Austin behind the curtain but Austin changes his mind and fights back and clotheslines H on the floor. Austin teases a suplex but instead H counters to his own snap suplex on the floor. H brings him back ringside for a toss into the stairs and into the SAT. Austin recovers and now sends H into the stairs. Austin waffles him with a TV monitor and H blades. Austin with more rights and flips him off. Austin locates his beer cooler and gets out a cold one and then blasts H with the cooler. Alright, this is funny. Austin: “I’M THIRSTY!”

• Austin takes a few swigs and then hits him with the can. Austin gets another and then smashes H into the can and into the stairs. Austin brings him in and gets the ring bell but H cuts him off with rights. They trade rights and Austin wins that one but H gets a low blow and an eye gouge. Austin no sells and goes for the Stunner but H nicely counters to a neckbreaker AND it has the built-in psychology. H with some rights and then wedges Austin’s head against the ringpost and takes him down with a clothesline. H covers for 2. H telegraphs a backdrop but gets another neckbreaker for 2. Austin recovers with a spinebuster and goes for the second rope elbow but H moves. H chokes in the corner and then they bring it back to the forth and H goes into the barricade. H slides out of a hotshot and gets one on Austin instead. H teases a piledriver on the stairs but instead Austin backdrops him through the announce table. Crowd pops but that was pretty tame. Austin mounts with GnP. Back in, H begs off Flair-style and Austin polls the crowd and they say kick his ass. Austin pounds him down and hits the Stunner. Austin decides NOT to go to the cover. So much for JR’s inside scoop on his plan. Austin gets a chair and puts it on H’s leg for the Pillmanizing. Hebner begs with him to reconsider and Austin does and instead puts it on his neck to a HUGE pop. Austin heads up top but H rolls to the floor to avoid. They brawl up the aisle. JR: “THESE TWO MAGNIFICENT STALLIONS WITH RIGHT HANDS!” Austin gets the advantage and they continue to fight to the back and behind the curtain. H eats a whip into a drink machine but the Radicalz are there and jump Austin and pound him down. A slew of refs come out and pulls the Radicalz away. Meanwhile, Trips is in the parking lot getting into a car. Benoit lures Austin back to the parking lot. Austin disappears and H demands Benoit go get him and drag him back out there to run him down. Austin blindsides H’s car with a forklift that’s impossible to miss except for those at home that couldn’t see it in camera view. Austin raises up the car and then flips off H. Austin: “GIMME A HELL YEAH, YOU STUPID SON OF A BITCH!” Austin then terminates him with extreme prejudice and drops the car down on its roof for the homicide at 25:03.

• Thankfully, H would sell a 50 foot fall longer than Giant getting shoved off the roof by Hogan. Giant’s selling lasted about an hour. H would be off TV for about 2 weeks, thus all the “Triple H no sells death” jokes of the time. I guess this was good enough to be match of the night, but more by default than anything else. Average brawl around ringside for about 20 minutes. Trips tried using some neck psychology but that was overran by the match’s story and the absolute necessity for vehicular overcompensation. I know I’m crazy but I preferred Austin’s ass-kicking of Rikishi at the previous PPV, No Mercy as it was shorter, more satisfying and more about Austin’s barely under control insanity than about a stunt like this. **3/4

The 411: A Kreski era, Big 4 PPV with 9 matches including Rock, Austin, Triple H and the Radicalz in action? Must be awesome right? Not exactly. Even the best matches here only rub ***. Proceed with caution.
Final Score:  5.0   [ Not So Good ]