wrestling / TV Reports

411’s TNA Impact Report 03.19.09

March 19, 2009 | Posted by Randy Harrison

We start out the show with a video package featuring the “highlights” from Destination X, with the only real highlight coming from the finish of the Ultimate X match. The rest of the show is also touched on with AJ Styles’ TNA Legends Championship win, Samoa Joe’s apparent murderous rampage and the Sting/Angle main event all getting time. I’ll give them this, that package made the event seem WAYYYYYY better than it actually was.

After the regular opening video we are LIVE-ish in the Impact Zone in Orlando. Now with PYRO!! The show begins with Kurt Angle making his way down to ringside along with the rest of the Main Event Mafia including a fully mummified Scott Steiner with his face in full mask. As usual, Sting is bringing up the rear of the group and it’s a bit of a surprise.

Random Impact Observation #1: Gotta love breaking kayfabe in the first thirty seconds of the show with Don West saying that he’d never seen Samoa Joe snap like he had “last night”. This show was taped on Monday night so I’ll give them that, but it’s a mistake that THEY’VE HAD UNTIL TONIGHT TO EDIT OUT!! Something like this in a post-produced show is just ridiculous to me. Yeah, it’s only a little slip but it’s an annoying one and one that shouldn’t happen. Period.

Kurt Angle gets on the mic and says that everything he predicted before Destination X came true. Angle says that he told Booker, Steiner, Nash and Sharmell that by the end of the night Sting would show his true colors and whose side he was on. Angle says that Sting proved it by having Mick Foley raising his hand after Jeff Jarrett pulled off the biggest screwjob since Montreal. Angle says that Sting tried to hide it by having Foley hit him with a chair during the match, but you can’t bullshit a bullshitter and Angle is the King of Bullshit according to himself (I’m slightly paraphrasing there.) Angle says he’s going to give Sting ten seconds to explain himself before the Mafia does what they have to do to him. Angle starts the countdown and Sting rips the microphone out of Angle’s hand at seven. He says that Angle’s accused him of being disloyal for the last time and that he’s been true to the Main Event Mafia since day one. He says that the only thing he has a problem with is Kurt Angle and that he owes Angle nothing, getting right in his face and screaming it at him. Sting adds that if Angle would like to continue the story tonight, he hasn’t changed and he’s still all-in. Nash gets in between them and takes the mic from Sting, saying that he agrees that he owes Kurt nothing. He follows that up by saying that Sting does owe the Mafia something. He says that they’ve been with Sting the whole time and they know that the heat has been with Kurt, but when Mick Foley has raised his hand for two pay-per-views in a row, Sting has something to prove. Sting seems incredulous and offers up the Wolfpac signal before asking what he has to do to prove himself to the rest of the Mafia. Angle snatches the microphone and says that he wants Sting to be his partner tonight and their opponents are going to be Jeff Jarrett and Mick Foley.

That brings Jeff Jarrett down the ramp with a microphone of his own. He makes his way to the ring, looking like he means business. He says that he’s told Kurt once and he’s not going to tell him again. Angle has no authority to tell anyone to do anything according to Jarrett and he is just a wrestler on the TNA roster, no more and no less. He says that no one has the authority to book matches except members of TNA management, which makes Angle laugh as he says that that must mean Jeff and Mick. He suggests that Jarrett doesn’t want to book the match because he wants to protect Sting. He yells at Sting about having honor and integrity, saying that he doesn’t have an ounce in his body. He adds that if Kurt Angle is going to screw someone, he’ll screw them to their face before questioning Sting’s example, calling him a liar to close it out. Sting says that he’d love to have the opportunity to be in the ring with Angle, Jarrett and Foley, but that Foley is on the inactive list and that he’s wrestled his last match.

Of course, that brings out “Mr. Bang Bang” and he’s got HIS own microphone. Man, this company must run through their whole budget on microphones to fit in all these promos. Foley gets right into Angle’s face and says that Angle kicked him in the nuts. He apologizes for hitting Sting with a chair during the match and asks when Sting was put in the position to make decisions for him and that he’s proven to the world that he can stand at ringside and watch a match as well as anybody. He says that deep down in his heart, he’s not a special enforcer or a businessman but a wrestler and that every once in a while, wrestlers will wrestle. Foley says that as far as tonight goes, he’s all-in too. Jarrett tries to stem the tide and talk some sense into Foley, saying that he needs to re-think it because it’s not what he really wants. Angle cuts him off and asks if it’s not what Foley wants or if it’s really not what Jarrett wants. Jarrett asks if they have to go down this road again and that there’s a locker room full of guys that would love the chance to kick Angle’s ass tonight. Angle says he doesn’t want any of the guys in the back, he wants Jarrett. He asks Jarrett if he’s going to pretend to be an inactive wrestler again like he always does whenever Angle wants him in the ring. He tells Jarrett to man up for once in his life and gets right in his grill. Foley’s trying to encourage Jarrett to do it and the Impact Zone crowd is trying to encourage him and after a pause, Jarrett says that one way or another this thing ends tonight so if Angle really wants him, he’s got him.

After the commercial break we get to see the end of the same segment that opened the show. You know, in case we forgot it in the three minutes that we’ve been in commercial. That leads into a video package featuring Suicide and the highlights of his debut at Destination X including his amazing title win. The package ends asking “What is next for this anomaly?”.

Match One:
Motor City Machine Guns vs. Team No Limit w/Kiyoshi

HELLS YES!! If this one gets more than ten minutes it will be worth the entire night of suffering I went through on Sunday with Destination X. Sabin starts out with Yujiro and they do some flipping and armbar work before Yujiro takes Sabin down with a shoulderblock. Yujiro off the ropes and Sabin tries a leapfrog, but Yujiro catches him into a powerslam for a two-count. Sabin hits a quick knee to the gut as Yujiro tries to bounce off the ropes and there’s the tag to Shelley who comes off the top with a sledge to the back. Shelley tries an Irish whip, but Yujiro blocks it with a blind tag to Naito to boot. Yujiro holds Shelley up in the Hart Attack position for a Naito dropkick that gets two. Quick tag back to Yujiro and he knocks Sabin off the apron before they hit a double-team hip toss into a seated dropkick into a front senton before playing to the crowd. Double-Irish whip into the ropes, but Shelley hangs on. Naito charges and Shelley backdrops him over the top rope to the floor as Sabin makes a blind tag. Shelley with a kick to the gut followed by a dropkick from Sabin and a DDT from Shelley that spikes Yujiro headfirst into the mat! Sabin poses before hitting the cover and that costs him as it only gets two. Sabin rams Yujiro into Shelley’s boots and makes a tag as they double-team again with a great sequence that ends with Shelley holding a reverse neck crank on Yujiro as Sabin hits a low dropkick. Shelley stays in and hits the cover but that only gets two as well. Tag back to Sabin and they whip Yujiro into the ropes for a double-clothesline, but Yujiro ducks it and goes behind on Sabin. Sabin reverses and tries to hold Yujiro for a double-team, but Yujiro ducks a Shelley clothesline and it turns Sabin completely inside out!! Yujiro takes Shelley out with a huge spear and here’s the HOT TAG TO NAITO!! HUGE MISSLE DROPKICK TO SHELLEY!! DOUBLE-SPRINGBOARD CROSS-BODYBLOCK FROM NAITO ON SHELLEY!! Dropkick sends Shelley out to the floor and he turns his attention to Sabin hitting a NASTY German suplex with a bridge!! 1….2…Sabin JUST gets the shoulder up before the three!! Whip into the corner by Naito gets reversed, but he reverses a Sabin charge, backdropping him onto the apron. Springboard forearm shot from Sabin on Naito as Shelley makes his way back into the ring. Sabin turns around and walks right into Yujiro who hits a MANLY spinning uranage!! Shelley drops Yujiro facefirst onto the mat and turns to Naito, whipping him into the ropes. Naito comes off the ropes with a big flying forearm and Naito tries to position both Guns in the corner before going up top. Sabin recovers and knocks Naito off the top, setting him up in the corner for an attempt at the Sliced Bread/powerbomb combo that they hit at Destination X. Naito fights it off and turns onto the second rope, but gets cut off by Sabin. TOP ROPE HURRANCANRANA by Sabin!! Naito rolls through!! 1…2…3!! It’s all over!!

Winners: Team No Limit (pinfall, Naito roll-up on Sabin) ***1/4

(As advertised, this was a great spot-fest and featured some beautiful moves and solid work from all four men. The reason why this one ends up rated a little lower than you’d expect is because they didn’t get a lot of time to tell a story and instead it just turned into a non-stop array of spots. Call me old-fashioned, but I think this match would have benefitted greatly from a good heat sequence with Yujiro in the ring taking a beating for five minutes or so before getting the hot tag. Maybe we’ll see them get twenty minutes or so at Lockdown to paint a bit more of a picture. Don’t get me wrong, this was entertaining as hell, I was just left wanting a little more.)

After the match, HERE COMES BEER MONEY!! They lay waste to Yujiro and Naito, dropping both of them with beltshots to the head!!! They kick both of them through the ropes to the outside and they grab the microphone. Robert Roode calls out Team 3D and here they come!! They make their way down to the ring and as Brother Ray tries to talk, Roode cuts him off. Roode says that they just need to listen instead of talking. He says that he and Storm respect Team 3D and all that they’ve done for tag team wrestling and in their eyes, 3D is the best team there’s ever been. Roode says that they’re TNA World Tag Team Champions and they’ve proven themselves night in and night out and yet they’re still disrespected. He says that people look at them like they’re a joke or a flash in the pan and says that next month at Lockdown, they’re going to put their belts back on the line against Team 3D in a city very near and dear to Team 3D’s hearts. A city where it all began for Team 3D. Roode says that when they beat Team 3D in Philly in their own backyards, only then will Beer Money get the respect they deserve. Brother Ray thanks them for saying that they’re the best tag team in the world because it’s the truth. He says that in Philly, at Lockdown, they’re going to do it the right way as they see the TNA World Tag Team Titles and raise with the New Japan Tag Team Titles. Ray calls it one match for world tag team domination before adding that Philadelphia is their backyard and where they became one of the most legendary tag teams in the world. He closes by saying that in Philadelphia, Team 3D will become the twenty-two time world tag team champions and Brother Devon adds in a “TESTIFY!!” to boot.

We come back to Impact in the executive office with JB and he’s got Mick Foley behind the desk. They use the segment to hype TNA Mobile and it sounds like it’s about Danny Bonaduce. Jeff Jarrett busts into the office and asks Foley what the hell he was thinking. He says that he didn’t bring Foley into TNA for this and says that he was backed into a corner by Foley. Foley says he loves him some pumpkin pie and that if he was forced to take the entire month of October without pumpkin pie he could probably do it unless someone was shoving it in his face and telling him no. He says that he didn’t get involved in TNA to be a special enforcer or to be in boardroom meetings, he got involved because he loves it. He says that he sees great matches in TNA and that it reminds him of how great he used to be and that once he’s gotten his little taste of it he’s going to be fine and be back to the happy executive shareholder he used to be. He says that wants the old Jeff Jarrett to go out there and have some fun, adding that Sting is the current TNA World Champion and that Angle, Jarrett and himself are all former champions meaning this could be the biggest main event in Impact history. He tells him that it’s good business and good business makes everyone happy as Jarrett still looks leery despite the pep talk of sorts. Tenay and West comment on the friction between the two men and then it’s time for a commercial break!

Random Commercial Observation #1: That “Buzz Ballads” record set they keep advertising on Spike during Impact should come with a free case of malt liquor and a tribal armband tattoo. I’ll admit to knowing pretty much all of those songs and actually even liking a couple of them, but I think I’d be too afraid of being turned into a typical fratboy asshole by buying the whole set.

Coming back from the break, we get to see the disaster that was the finals of the One Night with ODB contest from Destination X. That leads to a shot of the winner, Cody Deaner, in the crowd as he gets ready to cheer on his main squeeze.

Match Two:
Raisha Saeed and Awesome Kong vs. ODB and Taylor Wilde

ODB and Saeed get things underway with a lock-up and they trade go-behinds before Saeed makes the ropes for a break. Saeed with some right hands and a HUGE titty slap on ODB before she tries for a big clothesline, ODB ducks it and drops Saeed with a big bodyslam before tagging in Wilde. Wilde off the top with a double axehandle to the arm of Saeed and she follows it up by coming off the ropes with a tilt-a-whirl headscissors. Tag to ODB and she locks in a headlock on Saeed before Saeed shoots ODB off into the corner. Kong holds her by the hair in the corner and Saeed hits a running charge before tagging in Kong. Kong chokes ODB with her boot and rams her into the top buckle before ODB fires back with some shots. Kong with an Irish whip into a HUGE AVALANCHE!! Tag to Saeed and she hits the surfboard stomp on ODB following it up with a pin attempt that gets two. Saeed works the step-over toehold before getting kicked off into the corner. Saeed tries an elbowdrop and misses it leading to both ladies bouncing off the ropes to hit a double-clothesline. Crowd gets behind ODB and as Saeed makes the tag to Kong, ODB makes the hot tag to Wilde. Wilde hits a forearm and a pair of dropkicks, but Kong is still standing. Missle dropkick from the top rope and DOWN GOES KONG!! DOWN GOES KONG!! Wilde gets the pin and gets two, but Saeed breaks it up and makes the save. Saeed and ODB hammer away at each other on the floor while ODB takes a hit off the flask and in the ring Kong has Wilde up in a military press slam. Wilde slips out and down Kong’s back, hitting the crucifix!! 1….2…3!! Upset win for Wilde!!

Winners: ODB and Taylor Wilde (pinfall, Wilde crucifix on Kong) **

(Not too shabby a tag match actually. They did a good job of having Wilde do what she does best by fighting from underneath before getting the upset. It’s a shame to see that TNA has all of this talent and they just let it wither on the vine while guys like Foley, Jarrett and the rest get twenty minutes at the beginning and the end of every episode of Impact.)

After the match, Kong takes out ODB and Wilde. IMPLANT BUSTER ON ODB!! Cody Deaner jumps the rail and tries to save ODB, getting right into Kong’s face. Kong looks like she doesn’t want to catch stupid from the hillbilly and backs off to glare at them as she heads up the ramp. Samoa Joe is on his way to the Impact Zone and he’s got Sheik Abdul Bashir in his crosshairs!!

We’re back and we’ve got JB in the Main Event Mafia locker room. JB says he’s been Angle’s best friend since he’s come to TNA and he says that last Sunday night he took some notes during the main event at Destination X and he had an epiphany. He shares the notes with Angle, saying that Jarrett as the referee was knocked out by Angle and spat at by Angle. Angle laughs at that one. He says that Angle gave Foley the Angle Slam and kicked him in the balls really hard. He talks about Sting now, saying that Angle tried to bash his face in with a steel chair and then recaps everything that Angle did during the match. JB says that after everything he did on Sunday night, he has to think that at least a little bit of what he did led to him losing the match. Angle says that he had no choice than to do what he did because he was three-on one and it was like going into war with a cap gun. He says that tonight in the main event, they’re going to find out for sure whose side Sting is on and that Sting’s going to find out that Angle’s the Godfather of the Main Event Mafia for a reason.

Match Three:
Sheik Abdul Bashir vs. Samoa Joe

At least Joe didn’t bring his knife with him. Joe charges the ring and drops Bashir with a big boot, following it up with a flurry of punches that sends Bashir to the floor. Referee Rudy Charles tries to warn Joe about the punches with Bashir in the ropes, but he gets popped with a huge uppercut that sends him flying. Joe heads to the outside and grabs Bashir, hammering away at him again before ramming him headfirst into the announce table. Joe drags Bashir through the arena to the backstage area of the Impact Zone as the bell rings. Um…yeah.

Winner: Not A Damn Clue 1/2*

(It gets a half-star because that running kick on his way into the ring was pretty swank. I get that they’re trying to make Joe the angry guy that’s going beyond any wrestling match and into straight up violent territory, but since he’s made his big comeback he’s 0-2. There’s got to be a way to do it where he can be violent as hell yet still picking up wins because if he keeps losing like this week after week, people are going to start thinking he’s an idiot for making himself lose all the time. That’s just my two cents on it.)

Lauren’s in the back with The Beautiful People and she asks about Cute Kip and where he is, with Velvet Sky saying that Kip is on a probation period until he learns that no one is above the Beautiful People. Angelina says that Madison is going to be tested by the Beautiful People because no one can just walk in and become one of them. She says that it takes years of hard work and dedication to being the most beautiful creatures to grace God’s Green Earth. Sky says that they’re not interested in the 1-2-3 tonight and that they’re only interested in leaving the mark of the Beautiful People on “The Governor”. They say that it’s initiation time for Mi Pi Sexy and the hazing will begin for Rayne if she doesn’t take The Governor out for good. Love says this week it’s the Governor and next week, it’ll be the beast. That leads to a video package of the AJ/Booker match at Destination X and they try to put it over as a huge win for Styles and a huge win for his career. That leads to Jim Cornette in the ring introducing the new TNA Legends Champion, AJ Styles!! Cornette congratulates him for winning the belt, saying that it started out as a vanity belt for Booker T, but when he signed the contract he signed over the possession of the belt to AJ Styles if AJ won. Cornette tells him that not only is he the Legends Champion, he’s also the proud holder of a $200,000 belt. AJ says it’s a small step for AJ, but a giant leap for TNA and the TNA Originals. AJ says that the Originals have to come out to the ring and do it for themselves against the Main Event Mafia. He talks about how the Mafia took a lot from them, but he took a little bit back from the Mafia. He says that the belt is now going to represent faith, hope, respect and most of all it’s going to represent TNA. He adds that as long as he’s the champion, he’ll give anyone who deserves a shot at the belt a match because he’s a fighting champion. He’s also the one, the only, the original, AJ Styles! That brings out Booker T and Sharmell and they’re on their way to the ring to address the situation themselves. Booker gets into AJ’s face, saying that he’s talking a bunch of nonsense because he paid a whole lot of scratch for that belt. Booker says that Styles isn’t going to defend that title against anyone because while Styles might have the belt he doesn’t have the title. He finishes by saying that he’s going to be first in line for a match with Styles. Styles cuts him off, saying that he didn’t understand a word that Booker said and that he’s going to give a shot to a deserving WRESTLER. He calls Booker a paper champion before asking what he’s going to do. Sharmell gets involved, saying that Styles stole the belt and that Booker is going to get his belt back in his own time. They face off and talk trash before Sharmell and Booker make their way to the back. Styles gets in a great line off-mic saying that he’s going to slap the weave off of Sharmell’s head. That was fantastic.

Match Four:
Madison Rayne w/The Beautiful People and her purse vs. The Governor

Rayne charges and hits a quick go-behind, following it up with a paintbrush before locking in a headlock. Governor shoots Rayne off into the ropes and hits a drop-toehold into a single-leg crab. Love gets up on the apron to distract the referee, allowing Sky to get into the ring for a big kick to the back of the Governor. Rayne grabs a front-facelock and hits some knees to the face before covering for a two-count. Irish whip in and Governor ducks under a reverse elbow, hitting a flying cross-body for a two-count. Rayne comes out of it with a big boot to the face and she throws the Governor into the corner before distracting the referee. Love and Sky work Governor over in the corner before Rayne brings her in for a pin that gets two. Governor reverses a clothesline into a neckbreaker and hits a spinning back kick as Rayne tries to charge into the corner. Clothesline from the Governor into a jumping kick to the chest and she hits the BUTT BUMP to the face of Rayne in the corner. She drags Rayne into the middle of the ring and covers but can only get two. Rayne reverses an Irish whip and distracts the referee again allowing Love to trip the Governor up from the outside. Rayne tries for a vertical suplex, but the Governor gets a small package for the three-count!! Don West complains about a fast count and Mike Tenay sounds disgusted at his nonsense.

Winner: The Governor (pinfall, small package) *1/2

(Perfectly acceptable Knockouts match and probably one of the better singles matches with the ladies that I’ve seen on Impact in a while in terms of two women looking like they know what they’re doing in the ring at all times. Mostly seems like it’s here to set up a post-match angle, but it was good while it lasted. )

Sure enough, Love and Sky attack the Governor after the bell, dropping her with punches and kicks as Rayne digs into her purse for something. Love hits the Lights Out and Rayne hands the bag over to Love. She opens it up and she’s got scissors!! She hands the scissors over to Rayne and they start cutting the Governor’s hair!! Sky shrieks for her to cut more and more and she just keeps on cutting. Those scissors look pretty damn dull as they’re barely able to cut through the hair and even Don West cracks a joke on it.

From there, we get a video package for Lockdown, which is actually pretty damn cool as they have it set to Bullet With Butterfly Wings by the Smashing Pumpkins. Too bad the event will probably not live up to the packages leading into it. Tenay and West talk about the main event and apparently we have word that Samoa Joe has Sheik Abdul Bashir in the back of the Impact Zone. Bashir is strung up by his heels and Joe has the knife in his hand, saying that no one wants Bashir in TNA. He suggests that Bashir go back to where he came from and that he should tell everyone that anyone who gets in the way of the Nation of Violence will have the same thing happen to them. He makes Bashir hold the knife in his mouth and then says he forgot one vital part of the lesson. Joe grabs what looks to be a broomstick and goes PINATA ON BASHIR’S ASS!! Bashir cries like he’s being interrogated by Jack Bauer and screams for help as Joe leaves him twisting in the breeze.

Random Impact Observation #2: This actually makes a bit more sense in terms of getting Joe over as an ass-kicker and at least he didn’t do anything stupid with the knife this time, but it seems like they’re going to have to be careful that they don’t cross Joe too far over the line. It’s a short leap from dangerous ass-kicker to heartless bully and they’re tip-toeing on it as we speak. The people won’t get behind someone that’s a bully and they’ll have to remember that going forward.

TNA Rough Cuts is up next with Brother Devon and he talks about how wrestling struck a chord with him at an early age. He talks about his training with Johnny Rodz and how he met Brother Ray in the beginning. He adds that they lived ten minutes away from each other, but didn’t know each other. Devon talks about how he and Ray met in ECW and how they came together to form their team. He says that they’re true brothers through thick and thin and that they compliment each other and balance each other out really well. He says that he thinks that Team 3D have survived for so long because they have the same goal. He says that they both understand that if you don’t dance together in this business, you won’t get anywhere. We go back to the video packages, bringing up all of the Sting/Angle static all over again. That leads to a shot of Jenna Morasca in the crowd and it’s time for tonight’s main event!!

Match Five:
Kurt Angle and Sting vs. Mick Foley and Jeff Jarrett

Random Impact Observation #3: With the Impact Zone being in Orlando, at least they’re in the right place for a senior citizens match. That might sound harsh, but these are spots that could easily be going to some of the guys in TNA that could actually use the rub instead of guys that are on their downsides.

The bell rings and Jarrett and Angle get things started. Lock-up and Jarrett pushes Angle into the corner, leading to a clean break. Angle kicks Jarrett in the gut before grabbing a side headlock, but Jarrett shoots him off into the ropes. Angle takes Jarrett down with a shoulderblock and goes right back to the headlock. Jarrett shoots Angle off again and tries for a reverse elbow, but gets taken down with another shoulderblock. Side headlock from Angle, whip off by Jarrett, reverse elbow and a punch missed by Jarrett, but he gets a drop toehold before hitting Angle with the charge as Angle’s on the second rope. FARGO STRUT TIME, BITCHES!! Jarrett tries it again and Angle moves off, missing a clothesline that allows Jarrett to hit a dropkick. Arm-wringer from Jarrett and he tags in Foley but Angle breaks free of the arm-wringer and heads over to a neutral corner. Quick go-behind from Angle on Foley and Foley reverses it, taking Angle down with a waistlock before riding him a little in the middle of the ring. Foley celebrates and the Impact Zone crowd chants “Foley” while Sting looks on. Angle charges and Foley drops him with a clothesline followed by another clothesline that sends Angle over the top to the floor. Main Event Mafia security attack Foley as he makes his way down to the floor and Foley hits the double-noggin knocker but the numbers are too much. Angle grabs a steel chair and WAFFLES Foley with a shot to the back before hitting the ANGLE SLAM ON THE FLOOR!! Team 3D come down to brawl with the Mafia security and Jarrett is out to the floor to check on Foley. Commercial break time!!

We’re back to action with Angle getting a near-fall on Foley before we see the Angle Slam on the concrete floor from before the commercial. Angle hammers away at Foley, kicking at the legs and knees before trying an Irish whip. Foley collapses and looks to be in terrible shape as Sting looks at Angle and asks for the tag. Angle refuses to tag in Sting and turns his attention back to Foley, hammering away with right hands before coming off the ropes with a big clothesline. Angle gets the pin and covers for two before pulling Foley up by his flannel. Sting objects and yells at Angle to just pin him and get it over with, getting into the ring and into Angle’s face, but Angle just stomps on Foley’s balls while the referee isn’t looking. Sting gets into his face and tells Angle that enough is enough, but Angle shoves Sting off the apron into the guardrail!! Jeff Jarrett charges into the ring and hits some right hands into some clotheslines on Angle before hitting the Tennessee Pedigree!! Enziguri on Angle by Jarrett and he sets Angle up for the Stroke!! Angle reverses and rolls it into an anklelock, but Jarrett rolls out and nearly sends Angle crashing into the referee. Jarrett charges and Angle gets out of the way as Jarrett levels the referee with a clothesline. Angle’s to the outside and he’s got a steel chair, but Jarrett kicks him in the balls to break it up. Jarrett gets his guitar from the outside and sets up to hammer Angle with it, but Sting grabs it to break it up. Foley has a steel chair and he’s up on his feet looking for Angle, but Angle bails. Foley menaces him with the chair and wheels around to WAFFLE STING IN THE FACE WITH THE CHAIR!!! FOLEY COVERS AND GETS THE 1-2-3!!! Jarrett looks shocked at what’s happened as Foley sits on the mat and grins. Jarrett tries to figure it all out and we see Foley standing tall as Sting lays on the mat.

Winners: Jeff Jarrett and Mick Foley (pinfall, Foley chairshot on Sting) **

(Not as terrible as I thought it was going to be, but it still wasn’t that great. Having Angle work the whole match for the Mafia team made sense because he was the only one that was going to be able to drag this one into watchable territory and he and Jarrett did well in that regard. It was a little overbooked in the middle and at the finish, but it was at least solid which puts it ahead of about 90% of Destination X.)

We come back from our final commercial to see Sting finally getting to his feet in the ring. We see the Foley chairshot on Sting and Sting’s got a microphone in the ring. He says that if Mick wanted back into the game, all he had to do was ask. He doesn’t know what inspired Foley, but now he’s inspired by the two chairshots. He calls out Foley and says that two weeks ago he watched him on Hardcore History saying that Sting made his career. Sting says he’s going to be responsible for ending Mick’s career before saying that they need to go back to school for old time’s sake in the steel cage at Lockdown. He finishes with “Lights, Camera, Action! It’s Showtime, Mick!!”. We head to the back as JB is with Mick Foley and Jeff Jarrett and Jarrett says he doesn’t know what the hell is going on. JB asks Foley about the challenge and what happened to Foley and Foley asks JB to do the funny eyes again. He says that it was a gut decision and he’s proud of his actions and that the inspiration for it all was Sting. He says that Kurt Angle beat the crap out of him and that’s fine because that’s how the game is played. He says that he heard Sting telling Angle to “just pin him” and Foley calls Sting a condescending son of a bitch saying that he is in no position to decide when Foley’s had enough. He talks about the cage and says that what Sting calls hell, he calls home and that at Lockdown in the Six Sides of Steel, he’s going to tear Sting apart. Have a nice day!! That’s it, that’s all, that’s all there is from Orlando!!


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Randy Harrison

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