411’s WWE Smackdown Report: 1.27.06

Rey Mysterio versus Mark Henry

As Rey comes to the ring, clips of Rey talking about Eddie Guerrero from the Royal Rumble press conference are shown. He dedicates the rumble match to Eddie. Rey jumps Henry as he climbs to the apron, then knocks him off with a diving punch. Henry gets back in and shoves Rey down, but Rey gets a dropkick to the knee. Henry comes back with a clothesline. Henry shoves Rey to the corner. Rey hits an elbow and some kicks, then flips over Henry and dodges a butt drop. Rey dodges a corner attack from Henry, then goes for a Tornado DDT, but Henry throws him down. Henry places Rey on the top turnbuckle, then punches him down to the arena floor. Henry follows and tosses Rey back in, then covers for one. Henry whips Rey to the corner hard, then stands on him. Henry presses Rey and fakes tossing him out of the ring, but he just flings him back onto the canvas. He hits a splash, but doesn’t cover. Henry starts choking Rey, then chokes him with his boot. Rey fights back with some punches, but Henry gets a clubbing blow. Rey catches the ropes off a whip and heads outside. Henry follows, and Rey hides behind the stairs. Henry kicks the steps, but Rey’s gone. Henry checks under the ring, but Rey slides back in from the other side. Rey goes to the apron and leaps off, catching Henry and driving his head to the guardrail. Rey gets a 619 on Henry around the post, then kicks the second rope as Henry re-enters. Rey gets a legdrop, a baseball slide, and a few running dropkicks to the grounded Henry. Rey goes up and gets the moonsault, but Henry kicks out. He lifts Rey and tries to press him out of the ring, but Rey counters with a guillotine. Rey pulls Henry into 619 position and hits it, but Mark Henry catches the West Coast Pop. He goes for a powerbomb, but Rey slides out. Rey goes to the ropes, but Henry catches him by the throat and hits the Crowdkiller for the win.

Winner: Mark Henry
Match Time: 8:29
Rating: ***
Commentary: Well, I’m not crazy about the idea of Rey losing to Henry, but it made sense for Henry to pick up a win, and Benoit’s busy. Let’s hope Rey takes the Rumble and beats Henry in a rematch, maybe even at No Way Out.

Matt Hardy cuts a promo for the Rumble about how he likes being the underdog. So he’s ecstatic now.

Backstage, Booker T and Sharmell meet up with Randy Orton. Booker offers his help in the No Holds Barred match as his favor, but Orton declines. Orton hints that he’ll use his favor to have Booker throw the Rumble if they’re the last two men.

Clips are shown of the recent Smackdown tour of Mexico. Rey Mysterio, Chris Benoit, and El Hijo del Santo all paid tribute to Eddie Guerrero in the ring.

The Mexicools versus The Dicks versus Vito and Nunzio

The winning team gets into the Rumble. The match starts over a commercial, and we get back with Vito slamming a Dick, then taking a dropkick from Super Crazy. Crazy gets a chinlock on the Dick. The Mexicools get a double hiptoss slam on Chad Dick, then the moonsault/legdrop combo for two. Nunzio tags in and gets a snapmare on Psychosis for two. Tag to Vito, and they get a double hiptoss and a double elbow drop for two. Vito beats away on Psychosis, then tags Nunzio. Nunzio knocks Super Crazy off the apron, and Vito and Nunzio double team Psychosis as the referee prevents Crazy from getting involved. Vito hits a chinlock on Psychosis, then snapmares and tags Nunzio. Nunzio gets a snapmare and applies an armlock. Psychosis gets out and tags Super Crazy, who comes in with a crossbody on Nunzio. He gets a back elbow and a kick, then dropkicks Nunzio and hits a backdrop on Vito. Spinning DDT by Crazy gets two. Things break down with the Dicks taking the worst of it. Psychosis hits a spinning heel kick on Vito. The Mexicools get a double pancake on Nunzio and score the pin.

Winners: The Mexicools
Match Time: about 4:47 shown
Rating: **1/4
Commentary: Not a good match, but the right team won.

No Holds Barred: Chris Benoit versus Randy Orton

Hands are batted to start, and they lock up. Benoit backs Orton into the corner, but they come out. Orton gets a waistlock, but Benoit grabs the arm and tries to force Orton off. He turns it into a top wristlock, but Orton goes under and takes a hammerlock, then goes back to the waistlock. Orton grabs a headlock. Benoit shoots him off, but Orton comes back with a shoulder. Benoit goes for a hiptoss, Orton tries to float over, Benoit grabs a waistlock, Orton blocks a German attempt and goes to the ropes as we go to a commercial. Back on, they lock fingers, but Orton gets a kick and takes Benoit over with a headlock. Benoit slides out and goes for an armlock, but Orton rolls out and gets up. Lockup, and Benoit grabs the arm. He takes a wristlock, then grabs a standing armbar. Orton rolls out and pops up into a chop. Benoit hits a few more, then takes Orton down with a headbutt for two. Benoit goes back for the arm, but Orton grabs him and they goes against the ropes. Orton fires off some punches, then nails a European Uppercut that sends Benoit out. Randy follows and slams Benoit’s head on the announcers’ table, but Benoit comes back with a chop. Orton hits a kick and rams Benoit’s back into the apron. Apparently, this is falls count anywhere, as Orton gets two on the floor. Orton rolls Benoit back in and covers with his feet on the ropes for two. Orton stomps, then hits a snapmare and a chinlock. Benoit gets up and throws Orton off, but Orton hits a big dropkick. Benoit goes out of the ring, and Orton follows, taking a trashcan lid out from under the ring. He whacks Benoit across the back with it, then pulls a trashcan out from underneath. Benoit gets a drop toe hold on Orton, then slams him head-first on the steps. He chops Orton twice, then slams his head on the announcers’ table. They brawl behind the table, with Benoit chopping the shit out of Orton. Randy Orton comes back with an eyerake, then drops Benoit on the table for two. Orton rolls Benoit back in and gets two kneedrops for two. Orton goes back to the rear chinlock. Benoit escapes and tries to scurry away, but Orton hits a chinlock. He tires of that and goes for stomps, then leaves the ring and gets a steel chair. Back in the ring, Benoit ducks a chairshot, scoops out Orton’s legs, and goes for the Sharpshooter. Orton punches Benoit, then flings him off. Orton gets a jumping kneedrop for two. Orton gets a rear naked choke. He turns it to a front facelock, but Benoit gets up and hits a Northern Lights Suplex. Orton rolls out and Benoit follows. He hits a knee, then slams Orton to the steps again. Benoit gets a knee, but Orton fights back with punches. They brawl up the aisle, with Benoit sending Orton back to ringside with chops. Benoit whips Orton and gets a running forearm, then hits another and gets an elbow drop for two. Benoit hits the Three Amigos, then slaps his chest. Benoit seats Orton up top and chops him, then climbs up. Orton hits clubbing blows, but Benoit fights back with headbutts. Benoit hooks Orton and takes him over with a superplex. Both men are down, and Benoit’s first to his feet. He goes for the crossface, but Orton gets up and runs both of them out of the ring. Orton grabs the trashcan again and clocks Benoit in the head as we go to another commercial. Back on, Orton has a headlock on the canvas. Benoit gets up and out, then hits some chops. Orton gets an eyepoke and the 3.0. Orton heads outside and elbows Benoit on the apron, knocking him to the floor. Orton pulls the safety mats up. Orton sets Benoit up for a Piledriver, but Benoit backdrops him onto the concrete. Interesting note: Cole mentions explicitly that the Piledriver is banned in WWE. Benoit grabs a chair and throws a monstrous shot, but Orton moves. They head back in the ring, where Benoit dodges a strike and hits the Rolling Germans. He goes up top and hits the Diving Headbutt, but Orton pulls the trashcan lid in the way. Orton stalks Benoit, then goes for the RKO, but Benoit pushes him off. Orton hits the ropes, and Benoit nails him with the lid. He slaps on the Crippler Crossface, and after several seconds, Orton taps!

Winner: Chris Benoit
Match Time: 26:08 (including commercials)
Rating: ****1/4
Commentary: Very nice match, best I’ve seen from Orton in… well, possibly ever. Still, some of the comebacks were a little weird, like Benoit reversing the RKO and getting the Crossface so soon after driving his head into the garbage can lid. Still, superb stuff.

Animal is backstage, talking about all of his accomplishments. He says he’s gonna win and go to Chicago to take the title. Nah.

Finlay versus Funaki

Finlay slaps Funaki, then gets a front facelock and a clothesline. Butt drop follows. Finlay gets some trash talk, but Funaki kicks him in the face. Finlay fights back, as you might imagine, getting a kneedrop and a bodyslam. He twists Funaki’s wrist, then slams his hand on the mat. Finlay grabs an armlock. Funaki punches back, but Finlay pulls him down by the hair. Funaki gets an enziguri, then gets a rollup for two. Finaki whips Finlay and gets an inverted atomic drop. Funaki goes for the bulldog, but Finlay flings him off the top. Finlay gets a reverse Emerald Fusion (I can’t remember the name of the move) for the pin. Finlay continues a beatdown, leading to a decision reversal. A pissed-off Finlay pushes Tony Chimel down, cuts a decent promo, and hits the move on Funaki again.

Winner: Funaki
Match Time: 2:43
Rating: **
Commentary: Not much happened, but it worked to establish Finlay. He lost to Funaki, though. Hee hee.

Backstage, JBL tries to comforts Jillian over her Boogeyman fears. She tells JBL that she had a “small beauty mark” on the side of her face, and Boogeyman bit it off. JBL reassures her and they head to the ring- with Jillian leading.

Lashley cuts a rpomo about winning the Rumble and the title. Not much there.

JBL versus Scotty 2 Hotty

JBL checks under the ring prior to his match. JBL starts with an eye poke, then gets some punches. JBL gets a running shoulder, but Scotty gets an armdrag and a dropkick. JBL comes back with a big boot. Clubbing blow by JBL, and he slams Scotty to the buckle. He whips Scotty across, but he ducks a charge, gets a superkick, and goes for the Worm (how ironic). JBL hits the Clothesline from Hell before the Worm, but The Boogeyman’s music hits and the turnbuckles start smoking. No Boogey, but JBL is frightened. Worms fall to the center of the ring, and The Boogeyman sneaks up behind JBL. JBL bumps into the Boogeyman, who advances on him. JBL falls back into the worm pile. Boogeyman eats a bunch afterwards for good measure.

Winner: No Contest
Time: Who the hell knows
Rating: Call it *1/2
Commentary: Oh, that Boogeyman.

Backstage, Melina meets with Theodore Long. She makes like she’s seducing him, but then shows that her ankle is taped up after Angle’s attack last week. She tells Long that he did nothing about Batista, and now he has two strikes against him.

Krystal interviews Mark Henry and Daivari. The gist is that Henry’s gonna win the title, and they know Angle’s weaknesses.

Kurt Angle versus MNM

The bell rings over the commercial. Angle and Mercury lock up, but get backed to the corner and things get broken. Angle takes Mercury down with a headlock, but Mercury gets a headscissors. Both men get up, and Mercury conferences with Nitro. Angle gets a takedown into a front facelock. Mercury gets a hammerlock. Angle goes back to a headlock. Mercury shoots him off, but Angle comes back with a headlock. Mercury takes a powder and comes back in. He tags Nitro, who gets grabbed by the arm by Angle and thrown down. Angle lands a knee to the arm, then grabs a Fujiwara Armbar. Angle gets a hammerlock, but Nitro elbows him off. Angle throws Nitro to the corner and catches him with several punches. Across the ring, Johnny boots a charge, but Angle gets a backdrop. MNM double team with knee shots, taking Angle down. Nitro punches away on Angle in the corner, but Angle fights back with a European Uppercut. Nitro whips Angle and Mercury pulls down the rope, sending him outside. Melina kicks Angle, and Nitro heads out to toss him back in. Nitro gets some fists, then rams Angle to the corner. Tag to Mercury, who hits a running shoulder. Mercury gets a kneedrop, then distracts the ref as Nitro hits a blow over the apron. Mercury gets stomps, then a shoulder to Angle in the corner. Angle fights out, getting punches and whipping Mercury across the ring. Angle charges, but Nitro pulls Mercury out of the way and Angle goes shoulder-first into the post. Mercury covers and gets two. Tag to Nitro, who gets a running knee on Angle in the corner. Nitro squeezes him against the bottom rope, and Mercury chokes him as the referee is distracted. Nitro goes to a choke tags Mercury, and MNM hit a double gutbuster. Tag to Nitro, and they go for the Snapshot. Angle fights MNM off, then hits a German Suplex on Mercury. Mercury rolls out of the ring, and Melina hands him a roll of quarters. Angle beats on Nitro in the ring, taking him down with a clothesline and getting an overhead belly to belly suplex. Mercury and Nitro switch places, and Mercury nails Angle in the face with a punch. Mercury covers, but Angle kicks out at two. Mercury goes for a DDT, but Angle gets out and hits the Angle Slam. He suplexes Nitro out of the ring, then puts the Ankle Lock on Mercury. Mercury submits to the hold.

Winner: Kurt Angle
Match Time: 8:36
Rating: **3/4
Commentary: Say what you will, but I’ll never be a fan of jobbing the tag champs to any one guy.

Post-match, Henry and Daivari head out. Angle is ready in the ring. Angle struggles at first, but nails Henry with the Angle Slam. He slaps on the Ankle Lock, but Henry throws Angle off and out of the ring. Angle is shocked as the show ends.