Acero’s WWE RAW Review 8.22.22

How fun! My Mac decided to update about 1 minute before RAW automatically, so I had to cover the first ten minutes on my damned phone! Forgive the truncated report to start.

It’s Monday…you know what that means.

We are starting hot and heavy, with zero foreplay, as a cameta rushes over to a fighting Seth and Riddle! They’re goin at it until agents come to stop them. They take the fight to not the crowd, up some steps, looking to murder each other, but more goons come to stop them! We end up ringside, and Riddle hops off the barricade onto a pile of men. Order is finally restored as refs and agents hold both men back.

We get a run down of some of the cars then are welcomed, officially, to Raw!

A bit of a pregnant pause is hit and then…

TRISH FUCKING STRATUS IS HERE!!!!!

Good god she looks delicious.

Trish on the stick:

It feels so good to be here, she says, so good to be home. Not just Toronto, either….she’s talking about the ring, between these ropes. It’ll never not feel like home. She’s been thinking a lot lately…

BUT HERE COMES BAYLEY!!! Oh shit…

Back, and Bayley is mid promo talking about loving Trish. They are huge fans. Iyo says she’s been her number one fan for so long. She’s been all over the world, but Bayley is wondering…what is she even doing here?

Stratus says there is a big match happening later. Kind of a big deal. Edge v Priest. So she’s here to support him and before she was rudely interrupted by people clearly not Canadians…

Dakota says we don’t care what she has to say. Iyo says she doesn’t like Trish. Bayley laughs this off. None of them like Trish. They’re kinda sick of her riding the coattails all week long. They’re tired of Trish. This is their ring now. Stratus is the past, they are the now.

Bianca’s music hits. Who is Trish? Bayley ain’t even in the same Stratusphere. Trish walked so they al could run. Thank her because there is no Bayley without Trish.

Trish removes her jacket and tells her she can become formerly retired real quick.

Bailey tries to give them a math lesson, saying three is more than two, but here comes Alexa Bliss and Asuka.

Bailey says she’s good on fighting, and they will go at it at Clash of Champions.

Match 1: Asuka And Alexa Bliss vs Dakota Kai and Iyo Sky

Asuka and Iyo start, but Iyo ain’t down, and she tags in Dakota, smartly building the anticipation for these two. Sky takes down Asuka, head scissors to Sky, Asuka with a whip, and Sky lands outside on her feet, taking a quick break. Ref starts the count and Sky gets back into the ring…at 8, only for Asuka to hip attack her to the outside. Sky hops off the apron, and Bliss hits a baseball slide into her, knocking her on her ass.

We come back and Iyo and Bliss are in the ring. Iyo locks up from behind, slams Bliss down. Bliss reverses, get a quick tag to Asuka. Iyo looks to not want the smoke. Asuka calls her a chicken. They then shout that they don’t like each other. Asuka kicks, Iyo back bends to evade, rolls up Asuka, Asuka tries for a Shining Wizard, but Iyo dodges, grabs the wrist, kicks Asuka in the throat. Nice. Tag to Dakota. Sky sends Asuka down hard. Sky whips, reversed, high knee from Asuka to Dakota. Akua kicks, another, over and over to the face. Tag to Bliss. Her and Asuka double team Dakota, whipping her to the ropes, Bliss with a huge right. Bulldog from Asuka. Cover. 1…2….NO!!! Bliss with a rollup. 1..2.NO!!! Another roll up for 1….NO!!! A third! This one gets 2. Dakota punches the mid section. Sky to the outside. Bliss to the apron! She front flips onto both Sky and Kai! Bliss calls for the title win, grabs Dakota, and sends her into the ring.

Tamina and Dana Brooke are watching backstage for some reason. Dakota kicks Bliss, whips ot the orpes, ducks under, slips to the outside, and pulls the legs out from Bliss. Huge boot to the face of Bliss.

We ARE BACK! Asuka gets a very convincing cover for 1..2..NO!!! Backstage, Nikki, Piper, and Aliyah are watching together. Why? Cuz we only have so many tvs backstage.

In the ring, Sky hits a double knees to the back of Asuka, then springboard dropkicks Asuka down hard. Cover for 1..2.NO!! Bliss interrupts. In comes Sky, Bliss is sent to the outside. Tag from Kai. IN she comes, locking up Asuka and trying to suplex. Asuka turns this into a backslide for 1..2…NO!!! Sky flips with a scorpion kick to ASuka. Asuka misses a hip attack. Big boot from Kai. Cover for 1..2..N!O!! Kai calls for the end, Asuka hits a backfist, tag from Bliss, she comes in for a DDT, kicks the entering Sky! DOUBLE DDT TO BOTH WOMEN AND THEY SELL IT LIKE DEATH!!! Tag to Asuka. We get a side Russian leg sweep/bulldog move combo then Asuka tries for the Asuka Lock, but here comes Sky to break it up! Bliss sends her right back outside. Bliss gets the tag. Bliss sets Kai up for her finish. Bliss to the top rope. Tag from Asuka. Twistd Bliss to Kai, but THE KNEES WERE UP!!!! Sky in to kick Bliss out. Asuka with a kick to Sky. She misses a backfist, hits one, misses a third, Kai hits a forearm, rushes the corner, misses a big boot.

Sky tags herself in. Asuka with the Asuka Lock to Kai!! Kai taps! Asuka thinks sshe won! In comes Sky! Rollup for 1..2….3!!!!

Winners: Dakota Kai and Iyo Sky
The entire story here was simply that Asuka underestimated both women, especially Sky. From the offset, her offense was dodged and overcome. I loved everything but the finish, as a clean win would have helped amplify the point they were trying to make.

Total Rating: 12 Quarters
Match Time: 18:36

Backstage, Ziggler is talking to Patrick. He says yes, he lost, but he just wanted to help Theory, that’s all. Dude’s got it all in front of him.

Here comes Finn, saying Ziggler is the same as Edge and Mysterio; they attach themselves to younger, newer starts, and stick to them to hold onto some relevance. They disguise this as help, but really they don’t need it, “kid.”

Ziggler tells Finn they’re like the same age. Lol.

Ziggler then clocks him in the face, and before exiting (entering?) gorilla, asks Finn if he’s going to sit there on his ass, or is he going to the ring?

Match 2: Dolph Ziggler vs Finn Balor

Lockup! Ziggler with the go-behind. Balor back elbows, misses, Ziggler locks the side headlock again, rope work and Ziggler hits a tackle. Finn backs into the corner, kicks Ziggler, sends him into the corner, misses a chop. Side headlock from Ziggler. They hit the ropes, Ziggler with a dropkick! He hops up in the corner and hits some right hands. Ziggler tries for a neckbreaker Finn pushes him away, drives some punches down onto the prone Ziggler. Finn sends Ziggler into the corner face first. Side headlock takedown from Finn.

We Come back to Finn getting a cover for 1…2..NO!!! Finn stomps Ziggler’s chest in a few times then backs up to await for him to stand. Ziggler is up, turns, and Finn tries for a slingblade, but Zigger rolls him up for 1..2.NO!! kick….runs up for a Fameasser, but Finn turns it into a powerbomb and acover for 1.2…NO!!! Finn backs into the corner, steps forward. HUGE dropkick from Ziggler! DDT! Cover for 1..2..NO!!!! Balor locks Ziggler into a Dragon Sleeper, wanting 1916, but Ziggler escapes, kicks, FAMEASSER!!! Cover for 1..2..NO!!! Finn rolls away, Finn to the top rope! He wants the end, but Ziggler rolls out of the way, dodging a COUP DE GRACE! ZIG ZAG!!! COVER! 1..2…..NO!!!!! HOLY SHIT chant as both men are down! Ziggler grabs the head, they get ot the knees, right hands from each man, back and forth. Big meet in the middle, kick from Finn, tagging the lower abdomen. Headbutt from Ziggler! Ref checks on Finn, Rhea with a cheapshot on the apron! Finn locks the head. 1916! Finn to the top rope! COUP DE GRACE! Cover! 1..2…..3!!!!!

Winner:
Rhea continues to be a determining factor and this was great. Not only did it have some time, it won a crowd over that was somewhat quiet to start. They were fully engulfed, and to be fair, so was I.
Total Rating: 15 Quarters
Match Time: 12:45

Aliyah is backstage with Sarah, and Sarah asks her if she ever thought she’d be where she is at.

Aliyah is about to answer, but here comes Bayley and her girls. She wants to take over the interview, and asks if Aliyah has been taken notes? IT doesn’t matter, though, because they’re going to win the whole thing. Also, where is Raquel?

Aliyah says its none of her business. Bayley tells her it’s stupid of her to come to RAW all alone.

But here comes Trish to Ding Dong Bayley and asks when she will be back in action? Aliyah challenges her to a match tonight.

Bayley and girls walk away, and here’s Pearce with a photo of Dexter and some security guards.

Here come Alpha Academy. Gable says that they are officially welcoming new students, and he wanted to start his search here in Canada, but all he has found is toothless, washed up hockey players. He found no talent in Canada, all he’s heard about is some geek named Austin Matthews. Too bad he’s an American, and he doesn’t have the talent to wash Otis’ jock strap. Anyway, he’s holding an open challenge. So he’s beggin Toronto to send him their best.

KEVIN F’N OWENS IS HERE TO ANSWER!!!!

Match 3: Kevin Owens vs Chad Gable

Owen goes in with the punches, then sends Gable to the outside. Owens rolls out and is met with some right hands. He fires back, chops Gable towards the seteps, hits another right. Gable rolls into the ring as we get a KO chant. Gable corners Owens, hits a few elbows, locks up with a side headlock. KO shoots Gable off, and Gable comes back…right into a wall. Owens grabs Gable by the ear, says, “Give me that cauliflower ear, buddy.” Lol. Nice. Gable reverses and chops Owens in the corner. Whip to the ropes, Gable kicks, huge clothesline from Owens. Senton to Gable! Gable rolls to the outside! Owens follows, and is met with a big T-Bone Suplex! Gable to the apron, Owens trips him up. Locks the head, wants to powerbomb Gable on the apron, but Gable with a back body drop! Gable locks up. GERMAN ON THE APRON!

We are BACK and Owens and Gable are exchanging right hands in the cnter of the ring. Gable nearly gets the upperhand, but Owens fights back. Gable kicks the knee, Owens locks the head and suplexes Gable onto the knee, head first! Owens runs to the top rope! He looks to fly, Frog Splash from Owens onto Gable! Cover for 1..2…NO!!! Owens shoots for the pop-up, Gable goes bhind, Owens tries for a Stunner, but Gable hits a German! Cover for 1..2….NO!!! Owens is farrrr, but Gable still heads to the top rope! He flies off the top rope with a headbutt! Cover for 1..2…..NO!!!! Both men to the top rope. Owens headbutts Gable of the top. Gable flies back up to the corner, locks the head, Owens turns this into a spinning suplex OFF THE TOP ROPE!!! HOLY SHIT I LOVE WHEN HE DOES THAT!!! Cover for 1..2….NO!!! Owens back to the top! He flies with a senton. KNEES UP!!!!

Gable runs to the top rope, goes for a moonsault, lands on his feet, SUPERKICK FROM OWENS!!! Shoots Gable up! POP UP POWERBOMB! Cover for 1..2….3!!!!!

Winner:
That was amazing, tight, beautifully put together, full of energy, and made me miss Kurt Angle just a little. Amazing.
Total Rating: 16 quarters
Match Time: 10:53

Otis attacks Owens from behind immediately! He sends Owens to the corner, goes for a shoulder, but Owens moves aside and Otis is posted! He sees Gable struggling to stand on the outside. He grabs Gable, sets up for a powerbomb, but Otis runs in with a clothesline to Owens! He sends Owens into the ring. O

KICK! WHAM! STUNNER!!!!

Gable enters the ring! KICK! POWERBOMB TO GABLE ONTO OTIS!!!!!!

Owens walks up the ramp, saying it’s his show, and he’s back. Love that.

Backstage, Finn wants to talk to Rhea about beating Dom so much recently, that he thinks Dom is starting to like it. As for Rey, he is “Six-One-Mine.” Priest says that only leaves one legend to deal with…Edge. He knows the cheers will be deafening, but this will be his last match in Toronto. All the cheers will turn into screams as Edge meets his Judgment Day.

Toronto native, Aliyah comes out for her upcoming match.

Bayley is slow to come out, looking a little sad for a moment, before hyping herself up.

Match 4: Aliyah vs Bayley

Bayley slams Aliyah down hard, as I realized I’ve been spelling her name incorrectly the whole night. A Quick CTRL+H and we are…back to Bayley who has the ear of Aliyah in her hand. She corners Aliyah and hits some knees, squashing her down in a seated position. Bayley grabs the ears again, Cover for 1..2..NO!!!! Bayley stomps the chest of Aliyah, another kick to the shoulder. Right hand to the face. Suplex and a cover for 1…NO!!! Bayley with a chin lock from behind. Bayley snapmares, stands up, Aliyah rushes the corner, Bayley side steps and hits some right hands. Leg sweep from Bayley, she hits the ropes and hits a clothesline. Cravat from behind. Aliyah turns into the hold but Bayley sends her into the buckle hard. Aliyah tries to fight b ack hard, cornering Bayley, then trying for a crossbody. Bayley catches her, though, and lays her across the ropes, then drives double knees down into her. Cover for 1..2..NO!!! Cravat, again, from behind. Aliyah is able to shoot Bayley to the outside, she hits the ropes, slides under the ropes, Bayley catches her, lifts her up, but Aliyah with a Stratus-like bulldog! She heads into the ring! Thesz Press! Bayley sends her to the corner, whip to the corner by Aliyah, she grabs Aliyah, but Aliyah slips into a submission! Single leg crab, and that was a weird exchange. Bayley grabs th hair, pulls Aliyah off of her. Stomp from Aliyah.

Monkey flip sends Aliyah flying. Bayley with a faceplant that Corey calls Rose Plant. Cover for 1..2…3!!!

Winner: Bayley
That certainly got a little sloppy there at the end, with Bayley moving slowly and Aliyah getting a bit too excited, but the right person won, even if she seemed a bit bothered at the last minute.
Total Rating: 6 Quarters
Match Time: 6:34

Match 5: The Miz and Tommaso Ciampa vs Bobby Lashley and AJ Styles

Ciampa and Styles to start. LOCKUP! Side headlock from Ciampa. Huge blow from AJ stops Ciampa in his tracks with a dropkick. Tag to Lashley, they go in to double suplex, but Aj hands Ciampa off to Lashley like a baws and Lashley drops Ciampa down hard. He grabs the head, Ciampa gets a tag. Miz with a few kicks in the corner. Lashley shoves him away, Miz misses a right, Lahley tries for a back suplex, Miz lands on his feet, looks to hit his finisher, but Lashley back elbows and tags in AJ. Strikes send Miz to the corner. Big splash in the corner. Firemans and Aj drops Miz right on the knee. In comes Ciampa, who gets a right hand. Lashley in, presses Ciampa over the top rope to the outside onto The Miz!

We are back and Miz hits a huge clothesline in the corner. Ciampa with an attack on AJ. Tag to Miz, Cover for 1..2..NO!!! AJ tries to fight bak, goes for a tag, but Miz lifts him up on the shoulders and corners him. Tag from Ciampa. Right hand to Aj. Aj elbos out, right to Miz, another elbow, Ciampa pulls him to the outside of the ring, Miz swings with a dropkick to the outside. Ciampa sends Aj over the barricade hard. Miz and Ciampa applaud. Laslhey runs over to protect Aj, but Ciampa sends Aj into the ring and locks in a cravt. Tag to Miz. Miz flexes again, totally mocking Lashley. Miz with a chin lock from behind. AJ reaches for atag. Miz drops him with a DDT. Cover for 1..2..NO!!! Miz drags AJ away from Lashley, tags in Ciampa. They wishbone e AJ then Ciampa locks in another cravat. AJ elbows out of it. Ciampa turns AJ, AJ with. Jawbreaker. Tag to Miz. Miz misses a clothesine. Pele kick to Miz! HOT TAG TO LASHLEY! Tag to Ciampa! Shoulder check. Another, clothesline in the corner. Back elbow from ALsahley. Clothesline to Miz in the corner, one for Ciampa, lock up of Miz. DDT/Flatliner combo! Lashley calls for a spear, but Miz gets pulled out of the ring. Lashley leaves, lifts Ciampa, sends him flying into the ringpost! He sends Ciampa into the ring. Bobby ready for a spear1 Ciamap turns, Miz pulls HIM out of the ring! Lashley leaves the ring. HUGE CLOTHESLINE TO THE MIZ!!! Lashley to the apron, Ciampa in the ring. He grabs the head. DDT TO LASHLEY! Cover for 1..2…NO!!! Ciampa ocks up for Fairy Tale Ending, Lashley escapes. SPEAR TO CIAMPA!!! Cover!! 1..2…NO!!! Miz in to stop the pin! AJ in to send Miz outside and flies over the top rope with a right hand!

THE HOODED FIGURE GRABS AT AJ FROM THE CROWD!!! Security gets a hold of him and pulls the guy into the crowd! AJ looks on, confused, then runs right into a boot from The Miz!

ANOTHER HOODED FIGURE!!! It’s Dexter!!! He grabs Miz with a sleeper!!!! He pulls MIZ into the crowd then down some steps!!!! The bell rings for the DQ!

Winners: The Miz and Tommaso Ciampa via DQ
Although I appreciate the attempt to give plenty of time for these guys, this did run a little long with the rest holds that kind of weren’t needed if Lumis was going to be a factor.
Total Rating: 12 quarters
Match Time: 13:44

Ciampa attacks Lashley from behind, AJ on the apron. Flies. Phenomenal Forearm!!! Lashley calls for a spear! Ref has left the ring, but the guys don’t care. SPEAR TO CIAMPA!!!

Holy shit, we come back and GARGANO IS HERE!! WTF!

He talks to the cam, saying he missed us! Gargano poses in the corner. Wow.

He grabs a mic and takes in the cheers from Toronto.

JOHNNY WRESTLING chant

Gargano loves it, skipping around the ring real quick.

Gargano says, “Well surprise, everybody!”

It’s been nine months since he’s been in a ring. First of all, thank you for reminding him who he is. His name is Johnny Gargano, and he was kind of a big deal in NXT. He’s a former NXT Champ, 3 time NA champ, tag team champion, first ever Triple Crown, and as a matter of fact, he won those tag team titles in this very building. It’s great to see Toronto again. Since he’s been gone, there’s been a lot of questions about where and when he’d show up again, and he had the same questions. For a long time, he had to ask if he even wanted to do this anymore. But one day, while playing with his six month old Baby Wrestling, he remembered he had big, impossible dreams: becoming the IC Champ, the US champ, the WWE Champion, and wrestling at Wrestlemania. Then it hit him; what type of father would he be if he didn’t teach his son that even the biggest, most impossible dreams can come true. If you work hard enough, you can get anything you want, he promises. When he left, he said, you will never fail if you bet on yourself, and that is what he is doing here tonight in Toronto. He stands here incredibly proud to say that Johnny Wrestling is back in the WWE, and we are just getting started.

A-Town….DOWN.

Theory is here to interrupt! Johnny seems happy to see him.

Theory seems annoyed. He wonders if this is real. It’s been what, nine months? “WHO’S YOUR DADDY” chant. Lol.

A lot has happened in the past nine months.

Johnny says, yes, he’s changed a lot of diapers and he’s also watched Theory. He’s changed so much.

Theory says he knows, every body knows. He became the US Champion, the youngest one to be exact. He’s competed at Mania, and he is on his way to becoming the new Undisputed WWE Universal Champion. Almost as if all the things Johnny has dreamed of….Theory has already done them. It’s…he couldn’t have done any of this without Gargano. When they were in NXT, Johnny took him under his wing, and now he looks around at all of these idiots saying WHAT, and they’re on RAW. It’s almost like he is the vet, and Johnny is the rookie. Think about it…he can stand behind Theory and be his caboose! He can carry Austin’s bags, or even better, carry the briefcase until he cashes in. Seems like Theory can show Gargano “The Way.” They’re untouchable! Let’s do the high five!

Theory stands with his hand out, screaming “HIT ME WITH IT JOHNNY!”

SUPERKICK FROM GARGANO!!!

Match 6: Edge vs Damian Priest

We come to RAW and the match is already goin down. Priest is sent to the outside and smiles about it. He re-enters and they lockup. Edge from behind, into a side headlock, rope work and priest shoulder checks him down. Edge hits his own, hits the ropes again, Priest tries to hop over, but Edge stops the run then shoves Priest on his ass. Edge sends Priest over the top rope to the outside. Priest to the apron. He enters the ring.

Another lockup. Edge with a go behind. Edge shoves Priest int othe corner back first. He works the left arm. Priest tries to shove him away. Rope break from Priest. Foot stomp and a right hand from Priest. Headbutts from Priest in the corner. Edge to the outside, Priest as well. Clothesline to Priest! Edge lifts Priest. POWERBOMB TO THE EDGE OF THE BARRICADE!!!!

We are BACK and Edge dodges a move from Priest, causing him to fall flat on his back. They meet in the middle of the ring with a clothesline, another, double boot and both men down! Flapjack to Priest. Clothelsine, another, whip to the corner by pRiest, Priest misses a splash. He hits the apron, hangs over a rope, and Edge hits the ropes then a swinging neckbreaker. Cover for 1..2.NO!!! Edge to the top rope, Priest to the outside. Edge flies! Axe handle to Priest! Edge breaks the count at 6 and heads back outside to grab Priest. Priest with the GOOZLE!!!! He chokeslams Edge against the ropes! Priest has Edge on his back, looking for the finisher. RAZOR’S EDGE ONTO THE TABLE!!!!!

We get a PIP here.

We are BACK and Edge and Priest are in the middle of the ring. Priest shoots him to the ropes, Edge spins into a Reckoning! We see Beth in the audience. Priest stands tall, proud, in the corner, Priest waits…Edge stands…Priest wants a SPEAR! He tries for it, but EDGE with A CHOKESLAM!!! Cover for 1..2…..NO!!!! Preist kicks Edge INTO Charles Robinson! Edge turns into a chokeslam from Priest! There’s no ref!! Priest rolls to the outside. He grabs a chair! Another chair! Priest slides it into the ring! He goes for a Conchairto! EDGE MOVES!!! He rolls out of the ring, pulls the legs out from Priest, and Priest lands on the chair! Edge grabs the chair leg and busts out a piece of it! CROSSFACE TO PRIEST!!! He pulls back on the mouth of Priest! Edge moves the chairs. Priest holds onto the piped piece. He runs for a spear. Priest clocks Edge in the head!!! He tosses it. Ref crawls in! Cover! 1……2…….NO!!!!

Edge with a Canadian DESTROYER!!! WTF!!!! SPEAR TO PRIEST!!! Cover! 1….2…..3!!!!!!

Winner: Edge
On the one hand, a hometown hero winning a stellar match just makes sense, but on the other hand, this doesn’t make Judgment Day look good, and they kinda need to at this moment. The possible saving grace is that a) Rhea looks bad ass after the match and b) we now have a trusted creative lead to possibly help save them.
Total Rating: 14 quarters
Match Time: 18:58

Edge isn’t done. He wants a Conchairto! He grabs the chairs. BUT RHEA WITH A LOW BLOW!!! Finn is her! COUP DE GRACE!

Finn grabs the chair, looking to finish Edge off. BUT BETH PHEONIX IS THERE TO STOP IT! She grabs a chair and enters the ring. She threatens chair shots for all of them! Rhea screams as Finn and Priest hold her back! Nice touch.

Judgment Day leaves the ring as we end the show.

End Show

9.0

The final score: review Amazing

The 411

I can't believe I'm about to say this but...the WWE did everything right tonight. Matches were incredible, especially the first 1.5 hours, storylines moved naturally and organically, wrestlers showed CONSISTENT personality and motivations, they both built towards next week, and future weeks, and they closed the show with a main event that sent the fans home happy in arena and at home. My only gripes about tonight were minuscule and simply not important enough to deter from the quality of the episode, which is something I usually say on Wednesdays. I know...I'm still in shock.